How Energy Intelligence Unlocks Your Leadership Power

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Are you ready to go from stuck to stoked? Does your company or team need a big dose of focused energy to jumpstart your goals? Or maybe you personally need more joy in your work life? I'm Susan Drumm, and this is the enlightened executive where your personal evolution sparks your leadership evolution. Each week we spotlight cutting edge strategies to help executives and entrepreneurs grow in leadership and in life. Today, we're going to focus on managing your energy and rediscovering your purpose to realize your full potential with my guest, Marley Williams. Marley is an interactive keynote speaker, an energy intelligent expert and joy instigator whose journey into transformational leadership began as a camp counselor. With a master's degree in education and two decades of facilitation and leadership experience, Marlee partners with extraordinary individuals and organizations ready to elevate their energy and activate their purpose. Her mission is to empower change makers and leaders to fully realize their potential. And she hosts the let's Lead Together podcast. And she's also the creator of the Connect Deck, a powerful tool for fostering meaningful conversations. Marlee, welcome to the show. I'm so excited to have you.

Oh, my goodness. Thank you so much for having me. I am super stoked to be here.

I want to hear all about your background because, okay, first of all, Marlee has so much energy. That's what makes her just want to jump off the stage when I've seen her. And, and so I'm here to kind of understand what's been Marley's journey and what have you learned about yourself. And then we'll get into how, because you have so much energy, how important it is that you've seen leaders need to. Managing, need to manage their energy. Right. And what that looks like. So let's dive in. Tell me a little bit about the story of Marley.

Thank you so much. Well, I'm, like I said, I'm excited to be here. And you know, when I think about my leadership journey and what really was the catalyst for that, it was after my freshman year of college. You know, I went to college. I had no idea what I wanted to do when I grew up like most 18 year olds, right. But, but I had a mentor my freshman year of college who ran the leadership center on campus. And her name was Sarah Thompson. And I thought that Sarah Thompson was like the coolest human being on the planet. And I went to this leadership retreat with her, like the first week of school. And she had talked about this thing called Outward Bound. I grew up in the suburbs of Chicago, I had never heard of Outward Bound before, but I like that moment inspired me to be like, if I'm going to be as awesome as Sarah Thompson, I better go on this Outward Bound thing. And so I started to look into it and she did a 14 day Outward Bound course. And I was like, go big or go home. 50 days in the wilderness.

Oh my gosh.

So I signed up for this. It was the summer after my freshman year, in between freshman and sophomore year of college 19, I decided to go on this 50 day Outward Bound course. And it was this leadership summer semester. And so the focus was really around leadership and using the outdoors to find yourself and learn about yourself as a leader.

And for people who don't know about Outward Bound, maybe share a little bit about what that experience is.

It's funny, I'm like, I essentially decided to go into the middle of the wilderness with a group of people that I didn't know for 50 days. And so it was an outdoor education program where they have all sorts of different wilderness activities. So my, my 50 day course included one week whitewater rafting on the Desolation, a week of whitewater rafting and kayaking. It was, and I remember it was called the Desolation Canyon on the Green river in Utah. That was like the start of the course, followed by a 21 day backpacking section in the Gore Range in Colorado, followed by two weeks of rock climbing in Vdevoo, Wyoming. And then we completed with a four day group trip that was kind of like our graduation where we were out in the wilderness by ourselves to like use the skills that we had learned for four days, like navigating through the wilderness. And so it was like, yeah, whitewater rafting, climbing, backpacking, hiking, mountaineering, like all of that stuff. And I had never done any of that before. I mean, my big joke is like the closest thing I got to camping was going to the KOA campground, which, you know, there's a pool, there's a coffee shop. So like, this was way outside my comfort zone. And I felt like it's like listening to the call. Like I felt inspired to go from Sarah, like learning and getting to know Sarah, being really curious about just leadership and development and then just wanting to figure out like who I am. I wanted, I literally, it was kind of one of those, like, I want to go into the wilderness and find myself and figure out, you know, what I'm made of or what I'm capable of or like, yeah, like using the wilderness as a means for personal growth and personal development. And transformation. And so that was really, like, the catalyst for me. And I remember coming home after that Outward Bound course and telling my parents, like, I figured it out. I figured out what I wanted to do with my life. I want to take people in the woods and make them cry. Essentially, becoming a wilderness guide.

That's what you did.

And so I wanted. So what I. That really inspired me to want to become a wilderness guide.

Yeah.

And be the person that changed my life. Those Outward Bound instructors, I felt like Sarah Thompson saw something in me. Those instructors saw something in me. It's like sometimes someone sees the greatness in you before you see it in yourself. And I was like, I want to do that for other people. It's like, I want to see the greatness inside people before they see it in themselves, to help them uncover and discover that and to use the outdoors as a tool for transformation, Essentially. I think that it's so powerful to step away from all of the noise and the dings and the rings and the distractions. And really, when you tune out the noise of the world and you tune into yourself, it's like, what's there? And who are you? When all of that is stripped away? That's Is a powerful place for transformation.

And I'm curious to know how you transform. I mean, obviously transformed of knowing and having something you were passionate about, that you wanted to pursue as a career. What did you learn about yourself in that process that was illuminated to you?

I think that it was the. What I got to see was there again, their insight, their reflection of me. It's like, I feel like I, from that experience, was able to identify as a leader. Like, that I have the skills. And it's like they were able to give me the language and help me understand how I showed up as a leader. Like, it was like this whole. There was a lot of feedback was a big part of the program. And so it's like, every day, the leader of the group would change. And so you'd get practice and you'd get these opportunities, and you'd get feedback of, like, what worked and what didn't work. And so it's like, I felt like it gave me the confidence to consider myself a leader and then to believe that I had what it took to help do that for other people. I think when I came back from that Outward Bound course, I was like, it's like when you have no idea what you want to do, and then you're like, this is it. Like, I found it. I figured it out. Like, it was It. It, like, there was this, like, fire lit up in me when I got back, and I was like, I want to find the best outdoor education program in the country. And so I. I applied to all of these different programs and schools and visited campuses. And my junior year, I ended up transferring schools because I was going to school at the University of Illinois in Champaign, Urbana, which is, like, my dad calls it, pancake land. Not a lot of, like, mountains or hiking around there. Yes. So I ended up transferring to the University of New Hampshire, where they had one of the best outdoor education programs in the country and got to study alongside, like, incredible, like, incredible teachers and mentors and guides. And, like, I was. So it's one of the phrases I love is, if you spot it, you got it. Mm. Meaning, like, I saw something in them that was in me, but it was, like, more developed, like, more fully expressed. And it's like, I, like, like, geeked out on how do you create transformation? Like, that was really. This question is, like, through the outdoors. Like, through challenge courses and climbing and the metaphors. And I'm like, I. It was like, when I, I. I got to major and study something that I was just, like, so freaking lit up about and got to be around people who were, you know, they were in the field. They were amazing professors, they were amazing mentors.

And so I'm curious, what did you learn that about how you create transformation in the outdoors?

Yeah. I mean, to me, I think it's like, the outdoors in and of itself is a powerful place for growth, but it's the person who's guiding the experience who changes everything. It's like, you can go out for a day of rock climbing and say, I went rock climbing, or you can go out for a day of rock climbing and say, that day changed my life because of the way it's facilitated. It's like, the container that that person is holding for. Like, what is the intention? How are they creating psychological safety individually and for the group? How are they creating safety for you to be able to take risks, to ask powerful questions? It was like. And I specifically wanted to major in outdoor education and not outdoor recreation. So outdoor recreation is like, I'm gonna go skiing with my buddies and, like, have fun. Like, the goal is fun. The goal with outdoor education, to me, was transformation. Yes. And it's like, I would see people have this ability to help someone shift their mindset, their perspective, their way of being just through. Again, a powerful question and how they showed up. And it was, to me, as I look back on it, it was really their energy, like, how I felt around them. I felt inspired, I felt moved, I felt motivated. I felt like, you know, this ability to test and challenge myself, to push my own limits, to step outside my comfort zone. But it was because I felt safe to do that.

So that's a great segue into all the qualities that a great leader does in other environments, not just the outdoors.

Right, right.

In firms and companies and startups and established companies. So tell us a little bit of how you transition then, and you bring some of that learning and lessons into what you do now for those types of leaders.

Yeah. When I think about this idea of your energy as a leader, one of the questions that I ask audiences is what shows up when you show up, when you walk into a room, it's really understanding what is your energetic presence that you bring? And to me, it's a combination of these four things. It's your presence meaning, like, how present am I? Am I checking my phone? Am I tuned out? Am I there physically, but totally checked out mentally? So presence. And that's one of the things that the wilderness does. It's like, here we are. It's 20 degrees. That will bring you into the moment. Right. Like just being in the elements. Right. But having presence, authenticity. You know, it's like people can feel it when people are not being real or fake or putting on this, like a performance. But it's like there's a. There's an authenticity and a genuineness to it that I think builds that trust and rapport. So it's presence, authenticity. The third one is capacity. When I think about someone who's resourced as a leader, it's like I have the capacity to meet this moment, to meet a challenge, to embrace success. It's like I have the capacity to hold it all because I'm resourced. And then the last piece is vitality. This kind of just like, I think something that I would see in my Outward Bound instructors and my mentors is this, like, kind of zest for life, this vitality, this like, sense of joie de vie. I don't know how to. It's kind of this, like. It's an energy that. That. That permeates everything versus, like the opposite of vitality is like someone kind of being like, meh, right, like, like feeling like the tone is flat. It's like a hat. So when I think about what does it mean to energetically power, powerfully show up for your people, it's kind of assessing. Am I present? Am I being authentic? Do I have the capacity to hold whatever is happening in the moment. And am I bringing the energy and a sense of vitality to the table? And so that's kind of as I've been almost recognizing the pattern, like you do, looking back, of what has inspired me as a student or as someone, like when I was in a position where I had a boss or a mentor or a leader, what helped me be the best version of myself?

Yes. And then that's what we want out of our leaders. So I'm curious. Let's delve into these four things a little bit more, because as I'm listening, I'm listening for where do I see leaders struggle the most? Certainly the first one. I think in today's world, we all struggle with presence. Given there's so many different ways to reach us. The phone, the email, the WhatsApp, the right. And all the things that pile up. Anytime we give our divided attention to something, we all know that that's continuing in the background. But the one that I think is the hardest is your third point, which is, do I have the capacity to be with whatever shows up? And I think that this is a place where a lot of leaders might say no, because I am stretched thin as it is. And so that's where I lack the capacity, because I just feel overwhelmed or frazzled or there's just so many priorities that nothing's a priority. How. Let's say they identify, like, that's the. That's the.

The piece.

What would you suggest they do to kind of rethink about their capacity and how they show up or how to get this piece that's so important in terms of your energy and what you bring to the table?

Yeah. I think it's such a good question in a world that's, again, it's demanding more of us more, often with less time, with less resources. And you. You know, I think about this framework that I've created to help leaders lead what I call fully charged. Because when we are energetically drained and depleted, we feel defeated. Like, there's no way that I can, you know, handle the things that are coming at me. And to me, you know, leadership isn't what we do and how we show up when things are easy, it's how we show up when they aren't. And it's really about the capacity to meet this moment. And there was a quote that I heard once that, like, you know, it's like, you hear those quotes, they're like, I just get you right in the heart. And someone said, I wish I Remember where I heard this for the first time? But it says when you choose you, others get the best of you and you bring out the best and others. And as someone who has been a recovering people pleaser my entire life, that is very counterintuitive. What do you mean, choose myself? It's like I have to show up for everybody else. That's what leadership is. And I think that shifting the narrative around, like your number one job as a leader is to resource yourself.

Right. And so getting clear on what is it that resources yourself, getting clear on that.

And these are getting to more like the tangible tools around energy intelligence, which I have a framework for, which is fuel, focus, filter, fun and frequency. And so the idea of how do I build my capacity? The first part is fuel is knowing how do you generate your own energy? We've been taught as leaders for so long to manage our time and time blocking and calendars and color coding and all this stuff. And at the end of the day, we're still exhausted. So it's like, that's not helping our capacity. That's what makes us feel like there's no way I can handle anything else. But if we start to look at our day of like, what's draining my energy and what's sustaining my energy, what's giving me energy and knowing, it's like again, being self aware. Like if everything, every single thing on my calendar, if I were to, if I were to give that a positive, negative or neutral, a positive is. It's giving me energy a negative, it's draining my energy. And neutral, it's like it's just something that I do that it could go either way. At the end of my day, if every day is like it's a negative five, you know, if you were to add them all up.

Yeah.

It's like the goal is, is net neutral. Like maybe things are kind of balancing it out. And I'm feeling like I have some neutral playing ground. Bonus is it's we're net positive at the end of the day. Well, yes, but most people aren't.

No, most people aren't. But I want to put in another piece here, which is sometimes you can have the same circumstances and someone views it as depleting and someone has a different perspective. So I've often, I've seen leaders who get depleted and when we look behind it, it's the story they're telling themselves about what's happening.

Yes.

Not necessarily what's happening.

Yeah.

So I think the trap in this is to be like, well, I just need to be in circumstances, that's all energizing. Well, that would be ideal. Great. And if you can find it, kudos to you, man. That's awesome. Go for it. And in the circumstances where you are, are there ways in which you can perceive a situation such as not so depleting because that's in your control?

Right. And that's one of the things. It's both the things that we do day to day. And it's like, can I take a five minute break and walk around the block or make sure I've actually eaten lunch not at my computer. Right. Like, there's these little things that I can do. But it's also, like you said, our thoughts. What am I thinking about the things that I'm doing? Oh, here we go again. I have another staff meeting. Here we go again. I have to lead this client call. Here we go again. You know, it's like, ugh. Ugh. Like when everything feels like a have to, what we're thinking about those things, it can feel really hard and heavy and draining. So one of my biggest mindset hacks is turning our have to's into get tos. Like, as a leader that you are in a position of privilege in a way of like, I get to inspire my team today. I get to have a really powerful client call to help them transform their life or their business. Like when we shift from have to to get to, even if we kind of have to grit our teeth through it because it doesn't always feel like that. I have to pick up my kids from school. I get to, I have to cook my family dinner. I get to cook this nourishing meal for my family or I get to order in if I don't want to cook.

Right.

Like, it's like, it's a simple mindset shift from going from like, have to and hard and heavy. When we say I get to, we can come from a place of actual gratitude for being in that role and knowing like the impact that you're making every single day. And I think that we forget that. But it isn't always just the things that we're doing. It's how we're thinking about the things that we're doing that can either drain us, deplete us, or motivate or inspire us.

Right. And in managing energy, I've noticed it is important to pay attention to what are some of those things that you can do for yourself that are going to energize. Like for me, I can't. I've got to meditate first thing in the morning if I do it really does set up my day well and there are times where I can't do it. So I, you know, I'm racing for an early airport or I, and I notice the difference of when that happens. So when sometimes it feels like oh, I've got so much to do, I don't really have time to sit there and meditate. Well then I realize actually my day is going to go a lot better if I can just spend the 15 minutes now. And that's ultimately what, what I've discovered more recently for this year I'm, I'm working on shutting everything down by 7:30. Now typically I've been in this pattern of you know, I'm in back to back meetings, then you know, go to dinner, then come back, then get to my email until 9 o'clock at night or whatever, sometimes later and, and I'm like, if I really want to get restorative rest, I've got to learn to shut it down. So, so I've got to figure out another way where I'm adding that time where I'm spending responding to emails. Maybe there's different ways I can respond to emails. I can have my assistant respond to a few more than I'm doing or there's other places that I'm putting time blocks for restoration in my calendar.

Right, exactly. It's like blocking out your calendar for whatever those non negotiables are for you. And sometimes we think that we have to have like this like two hour long morning routine and it's realizing like even If I have five minutes, maybe normally I do it for 15, but it's like getting to that point where like this is something that I do. It's like when I choose me, others get the best of me. It's like realizing when you're doing something like that, it's like I know my day is going to be so much better. It's, it's kind of this, it's counterintuitive. It's like slowing down to speed up because we were in this urgent respond right away to everything and it's like this is what I do to start my day on purpose and this is what I, this is having an end time in this 24, 7 world where someone sends you an email at midnight and this expectation and this pressure that you're going to respond, what are the part of that is the filter? What are the boundaries you put in place for yourself to protect your energy? Right. It's like how are we fueling our energy, nurturing our energy. How are we then protecting our energy and protecting our time and putting that on the calendar? Rest, recover, meditate actually and treating it as just as important as an important meeting with a client. Because you are your most important client for sure.

For sure. And I wonder then if there's just one thing. And I would just encourage leaders to pick one thing that you want to do differently and try that will give you restoration. Right. What is that one thing that you're going to add in? Like for me it's the, it's the. No, try to be off screens by 7:30. What's that one thing that you're going to shift? Because I know we sometimes feel like, oh, I need to do all these things, but like just keeping ground on one is going to make a huge difference.

Yeah.

What else do you see in terms of leaders managing energy where you know, kind of real tactical, specific suggestions that they can do so that they are bringing their full self and really impacting their teams?

Yeah, I think that what you said is so important. It's like knowing yourself well enough and like, you know, not making huge changes. But these small, I call it like a 1 degree shift of like what is one small thing that I can do to elevate my energy or to increase my energy. And part of it is like kind of like having a check in with yourself. You know, it's not assuming that every day is going to be a 10 out of 10. It's like checking in and saying, wow, I'm at a 6, what would shift it to a 7? And I think that the biggest piece that I see is people are just unaware of their energy. They have no idea. And so I think it's like I always say, with awareness there's freedom and choice and without it we just keep doing the same thing. And so I think it's the power of the pause and checking in before a big meeting or before going into your day, like, where am I at? Where's my, like just doing a little like moment to pause and check in. And sometimes it's like one of my favorite little hacks is I call it an emergency dance party where it's like, okay, maybe it's one of those days where I am not feeling it. Maybe I didn't sleep well, someone caught me off in traffic. Like things are not going well, but I still gotta show up. And what I say, bring the weather. Because that's what leaders do. It's like, I'm gonna bring the weather, I'm gonna Set the tone and the temperature and the energy. If we don't check ourselves, we will wreck ourselves and other people. It's like, check yourself before you wreck yourself. If I don't check in with myself and I'm not aware of my energy and something, again, all of those things piled up and then we bring that into the meeting. We have frantic energy, we have chaotic energy. We're complaining, we're stressed out. That permeates everything and everyone. So I think the biggest invitation that I would have for people is to do that pause to do that check in. And again, for me, it's like the emergency dance party. And it's like, headphones are great. You can be anywhere. It's like, do you have the playlist thing of putting on a song that gets you into a state, gets you into the zone? So the emergency dance party music for me can help shift or change my state. It might be taking a walk around the block.

Yeah.

For some people, it's literally grounding your energy and, like taking three deep breaths before you. Like after one meeting, before you go to the next. I think it's like we just kind of go, go without that, that check in and then we're just, you know, we're depleted, we're running on empty, and we're. We're not aware then of, like, the impact that our energy is having on the people around us. So awareness is always the first step.

It is. And also in pattern recognition, you know, my first step is to powerfully pause before you zoom out so you can see the pattern. But powerfully pause really has to do is you're checking in, but see if you can name the emotion you're feeling right now, whatever it is. Because naming it kind of gets you present to the circumstances you're dealing with right now. And so that's one piece that I think is critically important. When you take that beat, it's hard to know what to do in that beat. But understanding how to check in and saying, what am I feeling Right. Well, where can I love? I do love your energy. And you're someone who brings the energy, which is why I wanted to have you on here, because I wanted to understand what is it about? And you talk about it. What is it about that that you see? Leaders are most falling down. So where can people learn more about you and your work?

Yeah, well, you can find me everywhere at Marley Williams. So on Instagram. My website's marleywilliams.com and I would love to stay connected and support you in elevating your energy intelligence so that you can lead fully charged.

Excellent. And we'll have that in the show notes. Of course. We're excited that you came on to share your incredible energy as well. If you like this episode, you're also not going to want to miss my interview with Natalie Nixon, who helps us discover why creativity, not control, is the next frontier of leadership. Let's lead the way. Hope you enjoyed today's episode, and I'd like to point you to the next important step. Hit the subscribe button and the bell to get notified when we release new content. I'll see you on the next episode of the Enlightened Executive.