In this 43‑minute YouTube vlog, Tilly Lockey and her friend Tia answer a series of audience‑submitted questions covering common teenage challenges. The video opens with light‑hearted banter before moving into practical advice on how to get through down days, emphasizing the pitfalls of social‑media comparison and the value of self‑care days. They then discuss finding personal style, encouraging experimentation rather than adhering to fixed fashion labels, and stressing confidence over others' judgments. The duo tackles romantic uncertainty, advising honest communication, reading body language, and taking gradual steps when confessing a crush. They address feelings of invisibility within friend groups, recommending direct conversation and, if needed, seeking new friendships. Throughout, they promote a positive mindset by focusing on oneself, limiting toxic influences, using daily affirmations, and turning social‑media scrolling into goal‑oriented inspiration. The vlog also touches on coping with bullying and school isolation, suggesting speaking up or finding new circles, and balances academic pressure with enjoying teenage years, urging viewers to live in the moment. The episode concludes with a call to be one's own cheerleader, stay authentic, and engage with the channel.
Chapters
Tia, I've just realized we're like twins with the hair.
I was just about to say that. I think we look really alike right now.
We look so cute. Okay, anyway, hi everyone, it's Tilly and welcome back to my YouTube channel. Today we have a very special guest, me. It's Tia again. Today we are going to be giving you all advice. I basically took to my Instagram story— if you don't follow me on Instagram, I'll leave it down here. Definitely make sure to do that. It's Tilly.Lockey on Instagram, @gibtillyahand on Facebook, @gibtillyahand on Face— Twitter. But my Instagram is where I put on my story claiming to be an advice giver connoisseur, I guess, and I do not take that term lightly. I think I am very good at giving advice.
I'm also very good at giving advice.
I basically asked everyone to send me any kind of situations in their life, or just in general, that they wanted me or us to give our advice and our thoughts and opinions on. And I got quite a few really, really good ones, which I was very, very happy about. So yeah, today we're going to be giving our advice on these topics, I guess. But let's just get into it. Okay, so the first one that we got is advice on how to get through down days. Getting through down days—
first of all, everybody has their down days. You just need to keep that in your mind first of all, just to know that you're definitely not alone. I think that you just need to have like a day of just like pushing all the stressful stuff aside and just kind of like have a day to yourself.
Something that I kind of always think of and go back to is the fact that when you see on social media like all these people doing photoshoots for social media, they will always have— guaranteed, they will always have their best photo out of the bunch and they'll always have their worst photo out of the bunch. And they're not going to post that worst photo for everyone to see. They're always going to choose the best photo, so you cannot like really compare yourself— another cat— you can't really compare yourself to what you're seeing online because a lot of the time it is like heavily edited, like filters, all sorts, like any kind of acne or imperfections all removed. Unfortunately, it's not very authentic. Really important to remember that everybody has their bad part, everyone has their good part, and and what you see is oftentimes only the good stuff. Sit down, like, take a day or even just a couple of hours and just like really, really focus on what you want to do. You just need to take a little self-care day for you.
Sit in your pajamas, watch Disney films with ice cream, and you'll feel a lot better.
Sorted. Okay, this next one I really, really like. It made me feel very fashionable and like a fashion icon or something, which I'm definitely not. But anyway, it says, I need to find my style with clothes. How do I find a style that represents me. Well, I personally love style so much because I think it's just a way to express yourself. Our little dog down here is dressed as an elf because there you can kind of see his elf costume here. Yeah, Buddy the Elf, as in like the actual movie, because his name is Buddy. I think it's really, really great to experiment when you're trying to find your style. Like, I personally don't really have this one style, and I think it's okay for you not fit in this like boho or grunge kind of label. It's not got to be this set thing. I think advice on trying to find your style is honestly just to experiment. That's all you can really do, and just see what you feel good in, what you don't feel as good in.
You can't get like scared of people judging you and stuff.
Like, 100%, that's who cares.
Like, your life, it's actually— it's like your body, so why would on earth Why on earth would you care if someone was like saying, oh my God, what is she wearing?
Like, honestly, fashion— be individual, do it.
Yeah, be unique, be different. You don't have to look the same as everybody else. Like, and if they judge you, you obviously know that they're not a great person and to just keep your distance from them.
Yeah, get that negativity out of our lives. We do not need it. Your friend, he called me negative.
No, no, no.
Um, okay, I feel like Everybody is really stylish. It's just about finding what is the style for you. Okay, next one is: I'm crushing on this person who talks to me a lot about personal stuff. Do I confess? Don't really want to be messing with people's love lives, but also I kind of do at the same time. So I think if they're talking to you about personal stuff, sometimes that can just mean like they want somebody to talk to and they trust you. So I'm all for, all for expressing your feelings and confessing your love for one another, but I do think it's important to think about like, uh, obviously what the other person's intentions are as well. So it kind of depends what the type of stuff they're talking to you about.
Like, I totally agree with Tilly that if you do feel like that. It's totally way better to be honest because then they can either say, oh yeah, I do like you, and it can end up something great, or they can be like, oh, actually, I think we're just— I think we're a bit better as friends.
Yeah, if you truly value the friendship and they do too, then it shouldn't make things awkward. I just think you only live once and it could be your soulmate, you know? So like, you might as well say something about it. If you're not ready just to be like, hey, so I kind of like you, instead I think maybe like I don't know, drop hints here and there.
You don't need to go like full-on, hey, be my boyfriend. I think to just start off, you could just start kind of hanging out with each other more alone than like in groups and stuff.
Yeah.
And the more time you spend alone, the more the relationship should grow.
Take note of any type of conversations you have and like body language, all of that jazz. Yeah.
And then the more you— and more that you spend time together, the more you'll realize like what the person's feeling.
Whether they laugh at your jokes, even like if they're not funny, look into your eyes. Yeah, eye contact, like all that jazz. And if you find that you're getting that in return as well, it is time, my love. Do it. How can I get my friends to stop acting like I'm invisible?
I think you just— if you feel like that, I mean, they might be doing it without actually realizing that they're doing it, like completely unintentionally. So I feel like it's best to just bring it up as soon as you feel like it. Like, don't drag it, otherwise you'll just feel worse about it. And I would be like, oh yeah, well, we kind of don't agree with what you do, this blah blah, or it could be more like, oh my God, I'm so sorry, that was like, we didn't even realize that you felt that way. And things could get sorted straight away, and it should rekindle your friendship, hopefully.
And if it doesn't, then good riddance. Like, you know that it's good it's your time to go. I kind of resonate with this a little bit because I feel like the second I got into secondary school, like, I had the same friendship group like my whole life basically. And I feel like as soon as we got into secondary school, everyone kind of just changed, or maybe I just didn't change with them in the same way, if you know what I mean. And I never really made the transition very well. Um, but I always felt like I had this friendship group like my whole life. I basically, I started going and I just didn't say a word, which is crazy coming from like me saying that in my house because people—
she is so loud. Yeah, she talks for England and she never shuts up. So to, to, for her to be like, oh yeah, I just never spoke at school, that like shocks me because she is so loud.
Very.
She never stops talking.
Okay, okay, ever. Okay, okay.
Or singing.
Okay, I'm being bullied again. I was just really, really unhappy at school because I felt like I was just like completely irrelevant to everybody there and nobody actually wanted me there and I was just a nuisance. It was probably me overthinking, but I bet a lot of people can relate to that. But I think the best thing to do in this situation is just to speak to your friends and figure out if what they're doing is intentional or it's completely by accident. And, and if not, go get some new friends. Sorry. How can I be a more positive person. Again, I feel like you give out— you receive what you give out. Give out what you, you give. I don't know. Yeah, I'm not sure. I feel like the people that you surround yourself with will like definitely reflect on how positive you are. That's what I'm trying to say. Like, if you're around people who aren't hyping you up and they're like, oh my gosh, that's— you're so embarrassing.
What are them pants?
Why are you wearing literally 'What are you wearing right now?' Like, they are bad people to be around, and they're not bringing out the best of you in you in the slightest. I think the best thing to do is to get some new friends if that's how you feel. You— to be more positive, you honestly just need to focus on yourself. Like, I've been noticing a lot recently that everybody— unfortunately, we live in a world where we do like compare ourselves quite a lot, and I feel like I've been doing that a lot more than I want to be recently, and I kind of just found that if I'm like scrolling on TikTok, if I'm on TikTok with the intention of getting inspired for my next post, like myself, you're focusing on yourself. So when other times you would scroll through and you'd see somebody who's really, really pretty, like beautiful, and you'd be like, oh, why, why don't I look like that?
You know, I want to dye my hair that color.
Yeah, her hair is so much prettier than me. Oh, they've got a relationship that I don't have, and making me really sad. I feel like if you instead of thinking it like that, you should think of it like you're going on TikTok to find inspiration for your next move for yourself. Yeah, it becomes a lot more like goal-oriented.
And yet for you, um, like instead of saying like, oh, I wish I could be like that, you can be more like, I can be like that if I want to be. Like, I can do this, I can do that.
Take it as motivation to like get that, you know what I mean? On the topic of focusing on yourself as well, I feel like everybody has a passion, whether you know what yours is or you don't know what yours is yet. Everyone's got a passion, so you honestly just need to do what makes you feel happy. If you're really into art and find joy out of that, focus on that a lot more.
Like, literally, as soon as you wake up, do your little yawn, get out of bed, look in the mirror, and just smile at yourself and go, you look good today.
Yeah, that's what I was about to say. Pop a few compliments.
You look good today.
You look fine, babe. My girl.
Oh my God, so good. You woke up like—
I literally look at you 'Your skin is glowing, you are my favorite person.' Oh my goodness, you're incredible. Okay, catch you later, boo. That's what you need to be like. And it sounds really, really strange, but trust me, as soon as you start doing that, you will literally feel so much better in your own skin. I really like this one as well. It is: 'I've always been a great student, but I don't think it's worth all the hard work.
My life feels boring.' For me personally, I actually enjoy school. I know that's so weird, but I actually like revising and stuff, and people think I'm weird for it, but I do.
I mean, I wish—
Tilly hates it, but I really like it.
No, I wish I was like— I'm— I, I don't like it because I'm jealous of it, that's the thing. But like, if she's working, I'm like, good for you. I think sometimes as well you just need to remember to live in the moment. This person says, my life feels boring, and that's what you don't want because because you're supposed to be living your like peak years right now. Teenage kicks, you want to make the most of it. Like, do not spend all your time being wrapped around like stressed about this and that. You need to take your time to like live.
As much as it is, as much as it's great to like have the good grades and stuff, it is really not the end of the world if they're not as great as you hope they were. I just feel like you need to have that good balance between schoolwork and social life and then focusing on yourself as well in the middle. And since it is the teenagers, you just need to live 'em, girl. Just live 'em. Or boy.
Or boy.
Or whoever.
You. Everybody wants A*s for everything, but you need to know that it's not all about that and you can still live your life. Don't feel like on your deathbed when you're like 92 2 or something and looking back and think, damn, I wish I lived my teenage years when I had them. So I'm just looking at the timestamp now and it's like 43 minutes, so I'm gonna have some fun editing this, but I'm gonna wrap it up now. We can honestly talk for England.
I know, we talk that much, we should make a podcast.
We could— oh my God, we could definitely make a podcast. Who would listen to a podcast for us? Nab on about things for absolutely ages. I really hope any of you resonated with this advice. I really hope it helps you in a way. But moral of the story is just to focus on yourself. You should be your own best friend, be your own cheerleader, and yeah, just do what makes you happy. I really hope you like this video. Make sure to like, comment, and subscribe if you did. Turn on the notification bell, and I will see you all next time. Bye!
