Loving the Competition: Prospects in Competitor Groups

Hello and welcome to Mastermind Mastery, the podcast for professionals who want to create and run successful peer advisory councils, or as we call them, PACs for short, or they're also known as peer groups or business mastermind groups. I'm your host, Tina Corner Stolz, founder of Elixir Council, where I've been in the industry running groups since 2005 and now help those like you with education, certification, and support wanting to do the same. At one time, I ran 10 groups, nearly 100 members, and sold my groups For a Good Multiple and recently released my second book, Your Seat at the Table: How to Create and Run Your Own Peer Advisory Councils, published by Forbes, and grateful to you that it's an Amazon bestseller. I invite you to join each week where we share strategies and techniques to successfully launch and become a master of running your PACs. You'll hear insights, perspectives, do's and don'ts, learn from my and my guests' mistakes, successes, and get the inside track to key takeaways. Each time we have a guest.

We'll be having a bit of fun. So are you ready?

Let's get going and dive into today's episode.

Welcome everyone to another episode of Mastermind Mastery. I'm Tina Corner Stolz and I'm your host today. And the topic is what to do when you have a prospect that says, well, I'm already in another peer group. That is when you should celebrate. So we're going to talk today about actually how is it that that prospect who's already in another group can actually be in yours also or instead of. And it's not a time when you actually walk away. It is a time to celebrate the fact that they are in a group and there's an opportunity that they might also or instead of be in your group. Now, I know you may not think that that's realistic, but I can tell you, since doing this since '05, it is extremely realistic. And that more often than not, they would go into a group that I was running instead of saying no. They were happy with where they were. So today you're going to learn on what to do about that. So I'm going to give you some inside tips. About how to have the conversation to indicate where they are on actually considering your group and how to have just that initial conversation with them and how it can turn into an actual sell. So I was inspired to do this podcast today because yesterday I had a conversation with a prospect that was in another group. And amazingly so. I will tell you that story as we go along, but amazingly so, not only a group, but had scouted multiple groups. And there was some interesting things that happened during our conversation that you can expect is normal when you do have a conversation with those that are already in a group, or they used to be in a group and they aren't, or they're considering, etc., etc., right? So I'm sure many of you out there been in this scenario. And my goal today is to make sure that you have the mindset that instead of saying, oh darn it, they're already in another group, they're not a prospect for me, that that is not true, that that's head trash. I want you to get rid of it, and I want you to celebrate the fact that they are in a group. And now you can have such a much more fun conversation, because I love it when I run across somebody who is in a group, because now we get to talk shop. And we get to talk about what they like and what they don't like and how their experience has been, because now they truly understand what it's like to be in a peer group. So what do you do when you're talking to someone that is a prospect, in your opinion, for your group, and they say they're with, lack of a better word, a competitor? So what I do first is just say, well, that is really great, and I want to know more. So Do you mind telling me about your experience? So what is it like? And I love this because I'm listening for both experience, good and bad. So what do you do with that? So when you're asking, may I ask about your experience, it's just a wide open door. Okay, it's a door that You're listening for how they start off the conversation. Do they start it off with something positive? Do they instead start with something negative? And that will tell you a great deal. So why is that? Okay, here's some philosophy for you that actually is proven out. So it could be theory, but I will tell you it works. So when I'm listening, and let's just take, for example, the conversation I had yesterday, and I said, oh, that is great, and tell me about your experience. And he actually started off with a negative. And that tells me when somebody starts off with a negative that clearly their mindset is they're not happy with where they are, right? Because that's the first thing that comes out instead of something positive. Now, if they reverse, start with something negative— okay, then— I'm sorry, with something positive— then their mindset is they're more on the positive side, the plus side, that their experience is more of a positive than it is a negative. Now, that's just, you know, not quantitative data. It's just interesting, and I want you to pay attention to how they start when they're talking about the fact that they are in a group. Now, the other thing to think about sometimes when they start off positive is could be simply because they don't want to sound all negative about the concept because they believe in it and they don't want to start a conversation off that way. So they'll tell you some of the things that they do love, and then they'll go in some of the things they don't love. So what I do is when I'm listening I'm really listening and observing about why they're saying what they're saying when they're saying it, and I'm writing down on a piece of paper. So whether it's paper, whether it's in your tablet, whatever it might be, everything that I'm hearing, I'm writing down both what they love, okay, and what they don't love. And why am I doing that? Because I'm listening for what they want and what they don't have. So when they're telling me about what they don't love and I'm writing that, I'm thinking, okay, will them being in my group solve that? When I'm listening to what they do love and what they want more of, I'm listening for, okay, if they were in my group, would they get it the same or better? Because I'm also listening for what they are looking for that maybe I can't provide for whatever reason. Now, what could that possibly be? Maybe they're looking for, you know, particular type of members in the group, and that's not the type of members I have. Maybe they're looking for, you know, they want speakers, and maybe you run groups that just don't have that option. That's not what your main focus is. Maybe they're looking for groups that don't have speakers, but that is a focus of yours. And so there you go, that's another thing. Maybe they can't meet on Tuesdays because of some obligation of a regular leadership meeting in the, in the company that they have, or maybe it's, um, you know, travel that they have to do on that day, whatever it is. And so that kind of rules them out on being able to attend your meetings on that particular day. So you're listening for all of that. And I will tell you, the majority of the time, of what they don't like, I consistently hear is they don't like how the meetings are run. So again, if you have listened to any of my podcasts, you know that I always talk about the number one reason a member leaves a group. The number one reason is the moderator. Okay, now when you're an awesome moderator, you're going to have the normal reason why people leave a group— illness, they move, they sell the business. Okay, like tangible, you know, that's why they're leaving. But anything else of any other reason, it's because of you. So don't make it about you, and your retention rate will skyrocket. Okay, so if you— side note here— if you are having members terminate for none of those reasons I just mentioned— they sold their business, they moved, they are ill, like tangible, you know, this is why they cannot participate in the group— and it's something else, it's financial, it's, you know, they tell you something like that, or they tell you, you know what, they're just too busy, or whatever, it's, it's you. Okay, so it isn't that saying, it's, it's not you, it's me. It is you, all right? Because if they were getting tremendous value, none of those other things would matter. So going back, yes, that was one of the things he did say. It's one of the things he said as his journey to get to the group that he was currently in, was that he didn't like how the meetings are run. Like, he went to go to a meeting and of one organization and the energy level wasn't there. He went to a meeting of another organization and he didn't feel like if they were really his peers, um, he found that they weren't his peers because they weren't running a company or they didn't found the company, that they were really senior leaders and things like that. And that's not who he wanted to be around, and that truly isn't his peer group, right? They aren't his peers. So the group was poorly put together or it was poorly run. Again, if you have prospects that are coming to meet your group and they don't join, you got to look yourself in the mirror because is it how you're running the meeting and is it the guidelines that you're not adhering to? Are you letting bad habits happen, people showing up late or leaving early, etc.? Or maybe they're talking over each other or whatever it might be. So now let's go back. I'm back to he's talking. He's talking about what he is looking for, what he doesn't like, etc. So yes, he did start off negative, and he did talk about some of the things that he did like. And when that is happening, what I encourage you to do is say, ah, yes. Oh, tell me more about that. Oh, why is that? Has it always been like that? Oh, I can see why you would say that. Point is, you're interjecting so they know you're listening and you're understanding. And this may sound super simple, but my point that I want to underscore here: you are not interrupting. You want to keep them on that topic as long as you possibly can, because so many times the last thing they say is the most profound thing. And you want to make sure you don't cut them off, you don't have them end their conversation too soon, because that one last thing most likely is the most valuable for you to hear. And so if they're talking along and it feels like they're done talking, you go, well, is there anything else, you know, that you want to share about your experience? and that could be the big boom that you get. And yesterday that happened. It's always so funny to me because I'm like, this is all like clockwork and so predictable so many times. And what do you think that was? What was the big boom? I would love to hear what you guys are all thinking right now. So this big boom was the last thing he said is Oh, and I've given my notice, and actually my, my last day is, um, tomorrow. What? What? Score! Love that. I go, oh, well, really? You know, so why? And I wanted a summary from him. As to why, as to why he gave notice, because that then told me of everything he told me, the priority in his mind of what's important and he wasn't getting right. So when you're talking to a prospect who says they're with a competitor, the key things again you're looking for and that you're writing a list down is you're looking for opportunity of where it is you could be a better fit for them while determining if they're a good fit for you. Keep in mind, this is a discovery call. So discovery call means it's a discovery, a discovery to determine are they a good fit for you and you them, right? So you just keep letting them go when they're done and you ask your own questions and then you get the boom. And then what do you do, right? So at that point, I have heard then kind of his story, and I repeat it back. Okay. And I said, you know, Shannon, well, here's what I, I heard, and I want you to tell me if this is correct and if I missed something. I heard, for example, what you love is you love the peer group concept. For all the things that it is. You're excited to go to your meetings because you said you have a COPI every single month, which we love because truthfully every business owner has a COPI every single month. And if you're a new lister and you're going, what in the heck is a COPI? It's a challenge, opportunity, problem, or idea. C-O-P-I, right? Challenge, opportunity, problem, idea. Bring to the group, get it processed. He goes, I have, I have them all the time. I have them every month. He goes, I don't have— I don't expect them to be processed every month, but I have them every month. Perfect. I said, so what I'm looking for though is that you have 2 copies that you haven't been able to get resolved in the group that you're currently in. So for example, his were ESOPs because he wanted to take his company into an ESOP, and the other had to do with, um, let me think because I just drew a blank what the other one was. Hmm. Oh, expanding into a market that could double his volume. It's a good way to think about it. He wanted to expand into the southern hemisphere where it was warm there when it was cool here, and that would even out the curve of his sales. And he wasn't getting good feedback on how to do that. So he's looking for those two things that he really wasn't getting great feedback on. And one of the things he said is, I've gotten some feedback, et cetera. And he's kind of— I go, so, but the bottom line is you've gotten feedback that you didn't feel was good enough to take action on. And he goes, oh, yeah, that's true. So the point is, what I did was summarize. I said, here's what you're looking for. You're looking for a group that can help you on those two things, right? And you're looking for a group that has energy, that there's diversity, because you've talked about that, you, um, diversity in thought. You're looking for diversity. And what I also hear is diversity in skill set. So there might be members in the group that are great in regards to sales and marketing, some that are finance backgrounds, operations background, etc. And I go, so that will give you diversity as well, and you're looking for that? Oh yes, I am. He didn't even know. He didn't realize some of the things that were missing. Yet when he talked, it was clear that's what he was missing, because that is the definition or the interpretation of some of the things he was missing. I said, so, and being local, you want organizations that are local to you because of the local market but are doing business also elsewhere. I said, and so I went down my list and he was like, yes, yes. I go, did I get it all? Yes, you did. I go, perfect. I said, because that's the group that we have. I said, so you're a great fit for the group and the group is a great fit for you. So I just explained how the group can be a great fit for you. I said, so, but I need to know a little bit more if you're a good fit for the group, right? And that goes into a whole another conversation, and that's a different podcast. So you are in the catbird seat, not them. You're looking for that right fit, just not anyone. But when they are in a group, you never know— are they already out the door? Are they still two feet in because they're also looking for something else? There is probably 10% of our memberships, and it could be a little bit more, that are in more than one group because they will supplement their group experience with a different group experience for a reason. So a group isn't an all-encompassing group for everything. So that's why there's industry groups, okay? That's why there's niche groups in those traditional groups. So many times we have members in multiple groups because they want the industry group that meets every, you know, 2, 3 times a year, but really driven on metrics in that specific industry. You can't get that in a group that's local. And what you get in your local group, you can't get in the industry group. You can also have— so the point being that you can also have niche groups and traditional groups, and it's common for somebody to want to be in more than one. For the reason that the value they get is very different. And when you find somebody like that, they are truly continuous learners. And the majority of time— and I can't even think of one time against this— they will be your best members. They get it. They know what it takes to be a great member. And I'll give you this one thing that Shannon said yesterday was At the end, he said, you know what, I respect that we need to have the further conversation if I'm a fit. He goes, because I want to make sure I'm the one who gives more to the group than what I get. Ding, ding, ding, right? Perfect mindset, remember. But he understood it's a two-way street, so you can have prospects in an existing group with a competitor that are wonderful fits for you and will say yes. What I want to embark on you as we close out is that the key is to really ask about their experience. And I encourage you to use that word versus what do you like, what you don't like, etc., because saying tell me about your experience Leaves it open to them to tell you what's on their mind and gives you clues as to what's important. And it doesn't insinuate that you're getting ready to badmouth the competition, because you're never going to go there. You are never going to go there. You're always going to talk about what it is that you do really, really well, what your strengths are. What is— what's different about your group? And you're going to articulate that because how you articulate it, it's going to determine if that person is a great fit for your group and will get value and a longtime client. And the majority of the time, the answer is yes, right? So today's episode, hope your key takeaways are: use the word, your experience, do not shy away when somebody says they're with a competitor. That's when you jump in with two feet. Full force, because normally they will turn into a member because they understand what the deal is. You're going to then summarize at the end what you heard, get their commitment on that, and that sets you up for why it is your group is going to be a great fit for them, because you're going to align it with what you heard, with what they— their needs are, which they confirmed you got correctly when you summarized. So that's today's episode, Celebrate the Competition. And until next week, you go make it happen. Hey, moderators of peer groups, thank you for listening to today's episode.

To get access to show notes and exclusive content and resources, go to TinaCornerStolz.com or www.alexcounsel.com, where You can also become part of our online exclusive community, attend our academy where there are over 13 modules of how to create and run a successful peer advisory group, mastermind group, as well as free resources, white papers, checklists, and more. And you can even contact me there as well. If this episode resonates with you and you know someone who can also benefit benefit from listening. Please share with them by taking a screenshot or post it on your social media. I also love reviews and appreciate hearing from all of you, all of you who are doing this wonderful work of running peer groups. Please tune in next week for the next episode of Mastermind Mastery, and I will close by sharing something my mentor did after every learning moment with someone he connected with. He reached into his pocket and he shared a shiny pebble with anyone he passed knowledge to and asked them to forward that pebble knowledge on. Now I encourage you to pass on a pebble, the takeaways you learned today, to either your existing groups or fellow peers. Now go make it happen.