A comedian argues Canada should annex Minnesota, citing over 1,000 lakes, harsh winters, a French state motto, hockey obsession, and the fact that it already uses Canadian electricity. The only thing left is paperwork and health cards.
Okay, if Trump and his goofs don't want Minnesota, we will take Minnesota. Canada. We're taking Minnesota. Fuck it, it's ours now. Residents, please form an orderly line. What am I talking about? You guys already line up by default like us anyway. You're practically already Canadian. You're physically welded to us. Over 1,000 lakes. Winters that are like ours but with better marketing. Your history was the fur trade, like us. Your state motto's in French. L'Étoile du Nord. Star of the North. Okay, if that is not a province waiting to be reclaimed, I do not know what is. Look, we annex you. The only thing you would have to change is some letterhead. We're already your biggest export market. Minnesota's been rehearsing for this its entire life. You ever heard of Minnesota nice? That's a thing. It's like a documented social norm. Polite, emotionally restrained, deeply conflict avoidant. You even apologize like us. Watch this. This is how a Minnesotan pronounces the phrase "absolutely not." You ready? Well, that's interesting. The only difference between you and us is the pronunciation of a couple of vowels. Forget annexation. This would be a zoning adjustment. Canoes are not recreational in Minnesota. They're transportation. Your state bird is already the loon. You already use our electricity. Your official sport is hockey. Your roads just disappear disappear for half the year and nobody panics. You say sorry when you bump into furniture. Am I the only one seeing this? The only thing that's left is paperwork, a health card, and teaching you how to complain about the Leafs correctly. So come on over. We'll break out the ketchup chips.
Ten times Canada helped the U.S. with its wildfires, instead of whining about the smoke. 
