Do you make this common mistake?

Most people trying to transform their body start from desperation, which leads to extreme diets they hate and quit. The cycle of hating your body, hating the process, and burning out keeps you stuck. A sustainable approach integrates moderate changes into daily life instead.
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Now, the truth is many of us make plenty of mistakes on the journey towards our goals, and that's fine. The catch though is this one mistake that I tend to see amongst a lot of people when they're trying to reach their health and body transformation goals is that they will come at it from a place of desperation. They've spent so long in this body that essentially they fucking hate, they're disgusted by, that they become very desperate to change it. And although they've spent often many years, sometimes even decades, stuck in this place with their body, they now want an almost immediate result. It's like, what can I do? What click of my fingers can I make that's going to get me the instant result that I want? Because I'm sick and tired of fucking living like this. I'm sick of looking like this, feeling like this. So what can I do that will quickly get me a result? Now, the catch is with this desperate energy is often it makes us do relatively extreme things. We take silly extreme approaches with diet and often over-restrict calories, go on some kind of starvation diet, or we will choose some kind of extreme training program that requires us to do multiple hours a day sometimes, or at least an hour a day every single day, and it's all this high-intensity, go, go, go, go, go type stuff. Now, don't get me wrong, there's a place for it. There may at times even be a place for calorie restriction, but in the grand scheme of things, taking these extreme approaches because we're feeling desperate about being stuck where we were and we really want to get away from it— I hate being there, I want to be here. The catch with that is you've tried to leave a body that you hate by using a process that you're going to hate as well. It's like nobody really wants to fucking starve themselves into weight loss. Nobody really wants to beat their ass to death every single day with some kind of extreme training program in order to get to their weight loss goals. Nobody wants that. Yes, of course you don't want to be stuck overweight and unhealthy, but at the same time you don't want to completely ruin your lifestyle ruin your enjoyment with food, ruin your enjoyment with exercise, just to quickly get to this result that you will probably never ever sustain or keep because of the type of crazy approach that you took in order to get there. Now the catch is, as I say, if I hate myself, I feel desperate. I take desperate measures, choose a program or a diet that I hate, therefore cannot maintain it. And when I find that I can't maintain it, I then fall out of love with the idea of health as well. Health is too much. It's too extreme. It's too difficult. I fucking hate it. It's hard work and it's a process I don't enjoy. So why would I want to do it? So we end up stuck, sorry, where we were for even longer. And of course, because we've now tried this thing, often on multiple occasions, we've tried to get in shape. We've maybe even managed to get there at times and then lost it, got there, lost it, got there, lost it. We start to lose trust in ourselves. We lose faith in our belief that we can actually achieve it and keep it. So it's like, "Oh yeah, I know how to lose weight. I know what I have to do. I just have to cut back my calories and move more, right?" Cool. That might be an approach you could take, but the catch is, as you found, it doesn't fucking work. At least not in the long run. Yes, it might get you to the weight loss result, but it didn't actually build a body that you were proud of. It didn't give you the strength that you've required. It didn't necessarily build the fitness that you desired, but it got your scale weight down. Cool. So it ticked maybe one box. But as I say, you've now got a lifestyle that you've either got to maintain with this extreme diet and this extreme program that you never actually wanted anyway. You just wanted the outcome. So now you can hate the process of losing weight as well as the reality of being overweight. So we get caught in this common mistake of creating multiple things in our life which we're desperate to get away from. I want to get away from the body I hate. I want to get away from the stupid diet I've had to use. I want to get away from this ridiculous program I've had to use. And then as I say, we find that we're constantly running, so we keep sabotaging ourselves and fucking up, or so it seems, but it's not really that we're fucking up or failing. It's because we don't want to do it. It's like, why the hell would you want to starve yourself and why would you want to beat your ass with a program that isn't gonna give you lasting results anyway. So we need to be careful, guys. We need to kind of go, okay, well, there's a lot of shit going on around me. I'm seeing other people losing weight, but most of the people that we see lose weight, lose it, gain it back, lose it, gain it back, lose it, gain it back because they do the same shit. They make these silly mistakes, often not even realizing. They think that's the only way because they see others, their friends and silly stupid gurus and experts online claiming that's the way forward. Oh, just go on 800 calories a day and fucking essentially die whilst, you know, walking around. You've essentially become the living dead. Great. You lost some weight, but now you feel even more like shit. Your metabolism's broken. And anytime you try to eat anything that's off plan, you gain double the amount of weight back. Like, what is the point in that? What's the point in that approach? Why take an approach that cannot be sustained? Now, of course, When we take an approach that can be sustained, the catch-22 is often it takes a little bit longer. Doesn't mean results are slow, but they may be slower because we don't necessarily get that extreme weight loss on the scale and, "Oh my God, I just lost 10 pounds in 1 week. Wow." Now, the thing is, cool, you might have lost 10 pounds in 1 week, but can you keep it off? Have you become the person that can keep the weight off? And in many cases, we haven't. But when we take a process that's slightly slower, a process that we actually enjoy and can actually fit into our lifestyle without it actually being a burden and turning into something that we hate, then we find that it's much easier for us to become the person that we need to be that actually just lives that lifestyle. We can still have all the fun and all the enjoyment of all the snacks, treats, and sweets that we may have wanted, but we now don't have a body that we hate. We actually have a body that we're perhaps proud of, that feels awesome, that essentially is fucking weaponized and allows us to dominate our day each and every single day, and I've actually built it into my life in a way that's not invasive. It's not a burden to me. It's not a stressor. It's just a natural part of who I am. Now, of course, that's going to take some specific actions, and of course, if you want help or guidance on that, just reach out to me. I'm more than happy to give you help specific to where you are right now that will help you move forward. You just have to drop a comment below or reach out to me in the DMs and I'll more than happily do that. But the point is you don't want to keep making the same mistake over and over again. That's why we keep getting the same result. That's why we keep ending up stuck where we are. So we need to make sure that we do something different. Yeah, okay, you might hate where you're at right now, but don't come at this from an energy of desperation. If anything, use inspiration. Like, how much better could I be if I did this shit properly? Because I've got the option to take the low road again and do the same old shit and end up in the same old place. Or maybe I could make a new choice. Maybe I could do it differently and do it better in a way that will allow me to keep the result. So I'll just leave that with you guys tonight for you to think about. You know, we're heading, well, we're into 2024 now, but we've got this whole year ahead of us and many of us are going to have goals that we're chasing down, whether in our body or balance or being, or our business, but think about the approach you're planning to take. You can take many different approaches, and there are extreme ones, and there are less extreme, and there are manageable, and there are impossible. But at the end of the day, you need to take one that you can sustain, one that you will actually maintain, and one that you'll enjoy. Because if you hate the process, you'll continue to hate yourself as well as the thing that you think you need to do in order to get the result. So that's my message for you guys tonight. Of course, if you want me to dig into this deeper, let me know in the comments. Or if you have any particular questions of your own, drop those in the comments too. And if not, I look forward to chatting with you guys in my next video. Take it easy, people, and chat to you soon.
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