Do you really want to win?

Do you really want to win? Now, I ask this because many of us will say that we want to win. Oh, I want to get these particular results in my body, or I want to get these particular results in my business. And we say that's what we want, but yet unfortunately we still show up as if we're trying to lose. Now, ultimately we're not really trying to lose. What we're actually trying to do is avoid losing. But then by doing so, and therefore not fully committing to winning, we end up losing in the process because we then don't take the actions that we know we should be taking, which means we don't get the outcomes that we wanted or that we said we wanted. And then we get stuck in this place of uncertainty and of course feeling like a loser. The more that we do that, the more we show up in that manner, the more we will ultimately feel like we're losing. Sorry, people, uh, got a little one running around the room now. So once my distraction is removed, we shall get back to it. So yeah, my point is, unfortunately, many of us will show up claiming that we want to win, and even in our mind committing to the idea of winning. I am going to fucking do this. Like, these are the steps I'm going to take. I'm going to show up differently tomorrow. I'm going to go to the gym. I'm going to tear it up. And I'm going to burn off the calories I know I need to burn and start building a strong body. I'm also going to show up in my food. I'm going to stop eating this junk food shit, and I'm going to do what's required in order to make sure that I've constantly got healthy, nutritious food available to me so that I don't fall for the trap of settling for convenience and comfort foods. But then what really happens is the next day comes around and we hit a bit of a snag and we go, hmm, That was harder than I thought to get this shit nailed down. Maybe I'll leave it till next time. And then unfortunately, every time we say I'll leave it till next time, that's us now not showing up as a fucking winner. That's us choosing to lose. We make it seem like we had a good reason or a good excuse. Oh well, it's because this, that, or the other happened. Oh, you know, my boss needed me to work late. I had to work overtime, so I now didn't have time. Oh, my partner or my kids needed me to take them to, to their friend's house, or whatever it might be. Silly little excuses, which are generally day-to-day things, tend to get in the way, and we use those as our perfect opportunity to sit back and continue losing. So for example, my daughter, as you just saw, just come running in the room. I could have been like, ah, fuck this, I've just screwed up the live, my kid's now got in the way, and called it a day. Because of course there's going to be this big interruption in this video now. But doing that would be choosing to lose, because I'm here to win. I don't know about you guys, I hope you're here to win, and I'm here to obviously help as many people win as I can. But small interruptions and things like that that take place, we can't let them defeat us. I could have been frustrated, pissed off with her, and all the rest of it, but what's the point? She came in the room, I'm doing a live, oh well, I just move on, you know, because that's what we have to do. Sometimes we just have to either work around a thing that's getting in the way We work around it, or if we can, we put things in place to make sure that they don't happen. Now, of course, 99.9% of the time, you know, I don't have my daughter run in the room. That's because I put things in place. I let my partner know I'm about to go live, so can you please stop Nymera from running in the room? And she does that, and we're all good. Tonight, she's just been in the bath. I didn't tell her I'm about to go live, so what happened? She comes straight out of the bathroom and wants to run in the room. But we have to adapt sometimes. And like I say, I'm here to show up and win and to help you guys win. So I can't then go, oh well, screw this, cancel the live and start again. We just roll through. And you guys have to do the same when it comes to getting the body you want, the money that you want, the relationships that you want, and so on. Unfortunately, the process is not linear. It would be nice if it was, oh, I just do this, this, this, and then everything just falls into place magically. But it's just, it's not that simple. Unfortunately, life does throw up crossroads and barriers and obstacles that are continually going to get in the way. But we don't necessarily just have to be committed to the actions. We don't have to just be committed to, to the outcomes. We have to be committed to winning. Now, here's the beauty of this idea of winning. Winning can be different for all of us. Now, what I mean is we can redefine what it means for us to win. So, for example, my goal might be to lose 30 pounds, and I might be committed to losing 2 pounds a week in order to reach that 30-pound target. So initially up front, my, my, my marker for knowing if I'm winning or not is, am I losing 2 pounds per week consistently? Now, I might get to the end of a week, jump on the scale, fuck, I've only lost a pound. But I could see that as a failure and, oh shit, I lost this week, which is perfectly fine if that's how you want to play it. Or you could go, but did I show up and do the things necessary? Did I get my food on point? Did I show up and exercise? Did I make sure my recovery was on point? Was my mindset work in play? And so on. And then what we might find is all of our behaviors that we needed to take were actually nailed down. So therefore, technically, from a behavioral perspective, we did everything we needed to do to win. And part of the change is, yes, the physical change we want to see in our body, but it's also the behavior change that's required from us as a being. So if I'm doing that and I'm showing up and taking those, those actions and acting in those ways and those habits and so on, that's also a win. So I might jump on the scale and not have lost the 2 pounds, but I could still be considered a winner because I did what was fucking required to actually lose some weight. Now I might then also reassess and go, hmm, I've jumped on the scale, I've done the same things I was meant to do, but this week I haven't lost a pound or 2 pounds. Sorry, why is that? So we can look into it deeper. We can go, well, I still won my war, my weekly war with myself where I had to take this, this, and this action. But it didn't lead to the outcome. Why is that? And there could be a simple reason. Oh, well, maybe some other things went on that got in the way and prevented it. Maybe it's the fact that you've reached what we call a plateau, or you're approaching a plateau where results are starting to slow down. Then in, in that case, it might be a case of, all right, well, next week I need to take another additional action. Maybe I need to go a little bit more focused on my food, or maybe I need to train that little bit harder. Maybe I need to add in a training session or maybe I need to add in or remove some certain aspects of my meal. Perhaps I need to add in another meal, which we sometimes have when we reach a plateau. It's because we're not actually now bringing enough calories on board. Or it could be that I maybe need to increase protein or something like— there are lots of things that we might have to tweak if we're reaching that point. But ultimately, it's not just about the outcome on the scale or the outcome in the bank account and so on. It's also about the outcome of, of us and how we're showing up, who we're showing up as. Am I showing up as the person I need to become in order to live this reality that I see for myself, in order to first make it a reality and then of course to maintain it as a reality as I move into that version of me? Then of course at some point we'll go through this whole process again because we're going to get there and that result will become normal. And then we're going to see a new vision for ourselves where we want a new game, a new thing to win. And again, we get to define what that winning is to us. We don't have to sit there and go, oh well, I didn't get this or that this week, and I didn't take that action, so therefore I'm a fucking loser, and feel bad about things and feel bad about ourselves. We can find areas where we may be winning that helps to keep us on track and keep us in a more positive mind frame so that we can continue to move forward. Now, of course, there is one nuance around this. We can't lie to ourselves and make shit up or find meaningless things or meaningless wins to make us feel good if we're not actually getting the result that we want. So there is a nuance. Of course, we can redefine winning, but we don't want it to just be things where we're just ticking boxes. If it's literally just ticking boxes to massage our ego that's no good. The boxes we want to be ticking that we're actually tracking and monitoring are the ones that are actually going to move the needle. Oh, these are the actions that are going to get me results, not these are the actions that are going to make me feel good and make it appear as though I'm trying to get results, because of course there is a difference there. So my question for you guys is, where are you showing up with the idea that you want to win but acting as if you're trying not to lose, and therefore losing. Because this is what we often do— we don't commit to the win, we commit to avoiding loss. But as a result of focusing on the loss, we end up driving ourselves more towards loss because that's where our mind is focused, around this idea of loss, and not a full commitment to win. I'm gonna show up and fucking win because that's what I'm here to do. This is the outcome I want, and therefore I will take ruthless action in order to achieve it. So that's my video for you tonight, guys. As always, if you have any questions, drop them in the comments below. Or if you're stuck in this place where you're like, you know what, I do want to win, but I'm not exactly sure how it is for me that I need to show up in order to get these wins, drop me a comment in the DMs, drop me the word Kickstart, and we can jump on a call and I can build out a blueprint and a framework for you to show you exactly what you need to do in order to move yourself forward and ensure that you consistently win week on week, month on month throughout 2024. Thanks for watching, people. As always, I appreciate your time, and I look forward to chatting with you all in my next video. Take it easy.