You're stuck because you treat everything else as non-negotiable and yourself as optional. The speaker argues that self-care isn't selfish, it's what gives you the capacity to show up for others. Make yourself the first priority, not the last.
Now, one of the biggest problems that we tend to face when we're trying to burn the belly fat, lose the excess weight, and ultimately increase our energy and our confidence and our self-esteem is the fact that we refuse to make ourselves non-negotiable. It's like we've got all this stress, this, this chaos, this obligation and so on going on in our lives, all these different things that we know we have to do in order to keep every fucking thing going and spinning all the different plates. You know, we'll put all our time, effort, energy into those things because we see them as non-negotiables. A lot of time, I have no choice, I have to do this thing, or if I don't do it, no one else will, and all the rest of it. But the same rules apply with yourself. It's like if, if you don't take care of yourself, no one else is going to do it for you. So it's essential if we truly want to get results, whether it's in the, in the respect of wanting to lose weight, if we want to get out of pain, if we want to reverse chronic disease and illness, it doesn't matter what our health goal is. If we're not willing to make us one of our non-negotiables, then unfortunately, the only thing that we're actually entitled to is the ability to stay exactly where we are. So it simply means if you're overweight, cool, you get to stay overweight. If you're unhealthy, cool, you get to stay unhealthy. If you're in pain, guess what? You also get to stay in pain because you refuse to step up and do what you know you need to do in order to move forward with your results. Now, I know it can be a tricky thing. Often we, it's like, I know what I have to do, but I just, for whatever reason, I can't seem to make myself a priority on a daily basis. You know, I get started, I do a few days, and then shit hits the fan again and I fall off, and all these other things seem to be more important, even though I know it in a logical sense they aren't. I know I need to take care of me first, but I just can't bring myself to do it. And often it's because we've given our power away. We've said, okay, well, these things that are external to me are more important, and I will gain more emotional fulfillment by satisfying these things first. The catch is that's not true, because when we're overweight, we're unhealthy, we're tired, we're lethargic, we feel like shit, we look like shit, we've got low self-esteem, low confidence, we won't step up and do the things we know we want to do. That doesn't fulfill any emotional need, even though we're doing these things on the outside and satisfying all these other demands that we have in our life. We think they're going to lead us to a positive result, but they don't because we know deep down in here, we know that we're supposed to be taking care of us first. And I say this all the time, we're not taking care of us first because we're selfish. We're doing it so that it creates the ability to be selfless. We have to be at a point where our cup runneth over. I say this all the time, but we have to have an excess and abundance so that we have more to give to others. If we don't, all these other things that we claim are a priority and that we're, you know, we're making sure that all these things are taken care of first, well, we're not able to show up as our best to serve these things. So they don't get the best of us, we don't get the best of us. So ultimately we're all fucking losing out. So what we need to do is have the balls ultimately and the courage to step up and go, you know what, I am equally as important as all these other things going on around me. And in fact, I'm even more important to the point that I will make me the first non-negotiable. Now, when I say the first non-negotiable, I don't necessarily mean, oh, well, you have to take care of you first thing every single day. You have to fit you into a schedule that works for you, but you just have to make sure that you are actually included in that schedule, in that timeframe or that structure that you have for your day. You have to be accounted for somewhere so that you actually get the outcomes that you want so that you can give more both to yourself and to other things in your life. So my question for you tonight is, what will it take for you to make you the non-negotiable in your life?
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