Your BIGGEST Limiting Factor Is...

Now there is a harsh reality that exists for all of us, and that is the fact that we are our own biggest limitation. Now within that, the nuance is that ultimately it's our belief in self that tends to hold us back the most. Now of course, when it comes to change, we can change on 3 different levels. There's the level of self, there's the level of others, and there is the level of environment. Now, if any one of those three aspects isn't set up or conducive to the outcome that we want, to the goals that we want to achieve, then unfortunately it's going to make it very difficult for us to actually reach that goal. Or if we do get there and that thing hasn't changed, that thing within self, others, or environment, then we're going to find it very difficult to maintain this new reality. Now, the catch is, as I just mentioned, the big, the real big struggle is our belief in self. Many of us believe in the idea of the thing we want to achieve. Oh yeah, I want to lose 30 pounds. I want to be ripped and have a six-pack. I want to get out of pain. But the catch is we often don't necessarily believe that it's available to us. We believe it's available. We believe others can achieve it, but we often don't believe that we can. And that might be because of past experience where we've tried to get there before and we failed. Or it might just be based on the fact that right now we have so many other things going on and so many things that we're trying to juggle and plates to spin and all the rest of it that we feel as though right now this thing is— there is just no way it's possible for me. But often underneath the surface is what is actually driving that belief is our expectation, because unfortunately, we don't get what we want. We get what we expect the outcome to be. Now, the reason for that, of course, is because if I expect to fail, if I believe that it's not possible for me to achieve my goals, then I will want to prove myself right, which means I will show up in ways that ultimately make that the reality. Oh, I don't believe I can make it, but I don't want to be wrong, so let me do these particular sabotaging behaviors or fail to take the actions I know I need to take keep talking about, yeah, I'm going to, I'm going to, but then not actually do it, because that will then prove me right. That will then, without even realizing, give me a sense of uplift. Oh, actually, I feel good because I was right about that thing. See, I knew I wouldn't fucking make it. I knew I'd fail. I've just done my first 90 days, didn't get the result that I want. No, I wouldn't. So in some respects, that gives us an opportunity to feel good, even though it's only small. But it, it ensured a positive outcome in the respect that I was correct I would fail versus me taking the uncertain path of actually committing to the result that I wanted, knowing that there's a possibility I might fail. Now, there is always a possibility we might not make it, but when we believe we won't, as I say, we will act in accordance with that belief and therefore make it a reality for ourselves. So at some point, we actually have to sit back and go, well, do my current mindsets, do my current beliefs in myself actually serve the outcomes that I want? And of course, quite often we're going to find, well, no, they don't. Because it's no good for me to believe that it's not possible for me to make more money, or it's not possible for me to, to have a great relationship with my partner, and it's not possible to have great relationship with my kids and be a strong leader and a great role model. That's not possible. But if I do believe that it is possible, or if I think there's even the slightest chance, well, that gives me an opportunity or a window I can move into in order to start creating that as a new reality. Now, of course, in the beginning, the steps may have to be real small, and that's not a problem. We just need to prove to ourselves through action, through outcome, that the reality that we want is possible, that by me stepping up and showing up for myself, I am possible. The outcome I desire is possible, and therefore it may become a reality for me to achieve my goals if I actually stay consistent with these small actions. Of course, those small actions over time will probably have to change, evolve, and become new things, maybe bigger things. But we obviously have to build that belief in self first We have to establish some level of certainty within ourselves that will encourage us to stay committed, something that's going to allow us to build some momentum once that motivation at the beginning wears off. Because part of the reason the motivation wears off is not just because our motivation is temporary, which it is, but it's also because the underlying overriding belief that we can't do it, that I'm going to be a failure, That is what eliminates motivation. Like, you can watch motivational videos and all those types of things, and we have those moments of inspiration and we feel like, yeah, I'm gonna fucking do this. And then that little bitch on your shoulder, that little bitch voice starts nagging in your ear. You can't do this. There's no way you can do that. It's a nice idea, but it's not really for you. And then of course what happens is over time, that voice, that belief overrides the inspiration and the motivation that we had. The motivation depletes, and then the momentum, any that we manage to build up, will often wear off if we haven't accumulated enough data. When I say data, I mean results. So if we haven't got that data which proves to us that actually me taking action will lead to the outcome that I want, if we haven't done enough to build that up, then of course we again reinforce that belief that it's just not possible for us. So my question for you guys is this: Where in your life do you know that you're not showing up for yourself and you're constantly allowing yourself to believe that it's not possible for you, and therefore it's keeping you stuck where you are? Now, once you've identified that, what we want to do is go, okay, well, what can I do? What action can I take that will actually start proving to me that I can win? So we need a small action that you can take in relation to your goals that will start to accumulate some small wins. Let's say, for example, it's health and your goal is to lose 30 pounds. That's a great goal. Cool. We want to lose 30 pounds, but we know there are lots of things that perhaps need to be done in order for that 30 pounds to be lost. Where can you begin? What small step can you take that will help you start moving towards that? Could be as simple as, right, well, from tomorrow I'm going to start walking 10 minutes a day. Could be I'm going to increase my protein in my meals. Could be I'm going to drink more water every day. I'm going to make sure I drink at least 1 liter of water every single day. Doesn't matter what the thing is, it wants to be something that's significant enough that it will actually start to move the needle, but not so big that it's impossible for you to maintain. Because we need to try and build some momentum up front so that you can then start stacking the bigger habits on top of, because you'll have more belief in yourself and more ability, or therefore capacity, to handle a greater load with bigger behaviors, bigger habits, and bigger potential obligations that you set for yourself that will actually move you towards your, your result at a much quicker pace. But in the beginning, quite often we have to think big in terms of our goal but act small in terms of our daily habits and behaviors, because that's what allows us to build that momentum, but more importantly, build the belief that we can actually do this. Because without the belief, as I say, unfortunately we just stay stuck where we are wishing that we could have it, but feeling unwilling and unable to actually follow through on the things that we say we're going to do, and therefore reducing our trust in self, reducing our confidence, our self-esteem, and ultimately our belief. And again, remaining stuck in life, wishing and wanting for more, but being unable to attain it. So that's what I'll leave you guys with today. Where in your life do you know you need to step up, start taking some small actions, and start proving to yourself that you know you can fucking win this game? Once you've established that, establish a specific and small habit that you can start to build and work on over the next few days to start accumulating some momentum and start proving to yourself that you're a fucking winner. Thanks for watching, people. As always, if you have any questions, drop them in the comments below. And if not, I look forward to chatting with you all in my next video. Take it easy.