Utkarsh NarangFounder, IgnitedNeurons · Your best doers become your worst managers as you scale. I turn them into leaders so your best people don’t leave.

Why Do We Think About Ourselves So Much?

14 Jul 2025 · 1 min

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Utkarsh Narang explores why we're self-focused like eight-year-olds, and what changes it. In early adolescence, the brain shifts attention outward. As we form close friendships and relationships, we prioritize others over ourselves, though our sense of self keeps evolving throughout life.

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So what I'm hearing you say is that that 8-year-old, you spoke about things being me, me, me. And I think my hypothesis again is that for some of us, that stays throughout our lives as well. And then there is— I was talking to someone just last week. When we think about me as an individual, we sometimes forget the interactions that we have with the environment and how that shifts us. And so it's a very complex relationship that we have with me and with others. But how do you think that relationship for you has evolved over the years? From going that 8-year-old who's me, me, me to wherever you are today?
Yeah, I think that's— it's a different journey for everybody, but there's a similar underlying kind of neurobiology that at certain stages of your development— so say you start to become a teenager, you start to think a little bit more about the world outside of yourself. It's not everything's about me anymore. It's, oh, you know, these things are happening in the world. And, you know, you start to become a little bit more concerned about the bigger picture things. And then, you know, you form those best friendships in those teen teen years and then onwards, you start to think about life partners and things like that. So I think it becomes a little bit more important to prioritize your connections with others the later in development you are. So it's not just about yourself.