Google Underwhelm

You're watching the VSpot, your home for the e-com nearly news. Thanks, Amazon. BFCM is now a 12-day event going by the ad moniker Black Friday, Cyber Monday, Cyber Tuesday, Cyber Wednesday, Black Thursday, Black Friday again, Black Saturday, Cyber Sunday, Crime Monday. Let's do the news. Just reaching us here that a German court rules Google must pay €572 million for violating antitrust rules in price comparison sector. Disappointed, Google was without comment for almost 2 hours, during which time they earned enough money to pay the fine. Other big news yesterday that was dropped is Google yet again— Google entered the race for the Agentism program and launched their Agentik Commerce product by smears. The cool kids call it Google Underwhelm. Underwhelm is a first cousin twice removed from Google Shopping, a second cousin to Google Circles, and a distinctive fragrance, and not dissimilar to Google Marketing Live. Bloggers and analysts the world over have written literal column inches on the subject matter. We are so excited and buzzing to keep our sponsorship rolling with Omnisend, the email platform that's not officially Vinny-proof. It's officially Vinny-proof. No needless jargon, no alphabet soup of nonsense, just one acronym that matters: ROI. That's money in my pocket is what it means, because merchants are making $68 for every $1 invested in email. Yeah, they're not embarrassed by this, this partnership. It's just It's just that it's Black Friday, Cyber Monday, month, week, year, whatever it's called.

You know, that's why they're not talking to me.

Yet their CS team is still churning out the human hello. Tip of the cap to all of you guys and girls. That's the 2 minutes you're not getting back this week.