Vishen LakhianiFounder of Mindvalley | NYT Bestselling Author | Transforming Lives Globally

Dr. Shefali demolishes Vishen's idea of parenting

8 Jul 2022 · 1 min

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Transcript excerpt from a July 8, 2022 YouTube conversation between Vishen Lakhiani and Dr. Shefali about parenting practices. Vishen describes structured "daddy time" activities (reading encyclopedias, watching documentaries for 30–45 minutes) and expresses uncertainty when his son later withdraws; Dr. Shefali critiques the nature of that parent–child interaction, contrasting presence "spirit with spirit" versus effortful activities.

When my kid was 7 and 8 and 9 and I would ensure that I would spend half an hour to 45 minutes, one on one daddy time with him, and we'd watch a documentary or we'd read an encyclopedia. Then when he turned 9 and 10, he just told me he didn't want to do that. In a way, I'm kind of relieved that he wants to do his own stuff because then I can do my own stuff, but I don't know what's right and what's wrong.
You know, when you said I spend time with my son, or when we spend time with our children, we're thinking it means that we're going to be together, spirit with spirit. But when you describe what you do with your son, it sounded very like effortful and purposeful chemistry. Said, I heard, then I heard. What were the other things?
Reading an encyclopedia.
Reading an encyclopedia. And then what else? What was the third thing you said?
Watching a documentary.
Watching a documentary. I wonder why this kid.
I am so glad Hayden is not in the room.
Yeah. Another thing I never let my child do is listen to my.