Heart Meditation For Intimacy | Psalm Isadora

The most shocking thing in this world is that everyone is walking around starving for more and real intimacy, and yet we're all ashamed of that natural desire. And we've all been taught to numb and to suppress this desire for intimacy and connection on all levels of our relationship, from being a parent to being a friend to our families to sexual relationships being more sacred. And everyone is so hungry, and yet there's such a huge taboo that it's the last thing that we talk about. And so I see people doing all this work to, you know, open their hearts or open their minds, but everything's still stuck in their heads. And you're not going to make real and lasting breakthroughs until you actually include your body. And Tantra is this tool that I learned and I studied all around the world. I went searching because I had a very deep wound and trauma around connection and intimacy. I had come from abuse and sexual abuse, and it had made me feel broken and. And abandoned. And so I had put a wall up around my heart. And that may not be as extreme for you, but I promise you, 99% of the people in this world have these intimacy blocks and have these walls up. Whether it's something in your childhood that encoded a abandonment fear, or whether you've been in relationships where you felt a betrayal or disappointment or. Or you feel like you're the one who ended up being guilty. We all have these shame blockages that are keeping us from being real and from being able to move from being stuck in our heads and really awakening into our hearts and our bodies and tapping into our natural desires. And Tantra is awakening through the senses. Now I'm going to teach you a little magic tool that I traveled around the world to learn. I literally got on a plane and flew to Istanbul because I wanted to study with a Sufi master there, because Sufism is the path of love and opening your heart. And I knew how shut down I was from my traumas and from my intimacy blocks. And I felt like I was living my life in black and white. And I knew that there was so much more that my spirit came to experience in this world. And I knew that I wanted to be able to connect to other people with deeper intimacy and being able to just be myself. And now that I teach, I've taught tens of thousands of people, and so many of them have this feeling that their life is so. So small compared to what it could be, that they're just cramped up inside this life that they could be living, and they're not able to follow their Dreams and their desires, and they even have shame around their dreams and their desires. And so I went all the way to Istanbul and studied with the Sufi teacher. And he taught me the most beautiful meditation I have ever learned. And it helped me to break through something so deep in myself. And so I want to share that with you in this video. And it'll only take a few minutes of your time. If you do it with me right now, it'll change your day. It'll give you a huge aha moment where you're stuck in these intimacy blocks and not being able to open your heart to receive and to connect more deeply. And the thing about that, right, the surprising thing about always trying to protect yourself is the main person you're hurting is yourself. When you're holding back so much and you're not actually keeping yourself from pain like you think you are, you're actually living in that same moment of pain for the rest of your life. Because whatever that moment of pain was for you, of abandonment, of betrayal, of disappointment that froze inside of you and not wanting to feel, that has crippled you from having new experiences and actually experiencing what you want, which is intimacy, which is authenticity, which is love. So this meditation my teacher taught me, I felt like it took me from living in that black and white to living in Technicolor. And I see this happen all the time. I teach workshops and I'll just see a woman come in with all this self doubt, and it's literally, you know, like her skin is gray, she has a little cloud over her head, and you don't even know. You think that's who that person is. She walks around her life, everyone meets her, that's who she is, but that's not who she is. And after we just do this meditation in less than five minutes, it's like they have this completely glowing feel from the inside because their spirit wakes up. So I'm gonna teach you this amazing meditation that's gonna help you have that same experience in less than five minutes. But I wanna first tell you that real change like this, you know, it's not just like some bumper sticker I hear people say all the time, you know, move from fear to love. And everything is a choice between fear and love. But what I see those people doing is trying to escape their pain and make everything okay by getting addicted to these high feelings of bliss or love. And you can't love someone enough or anything enough to not feel your pain, to escape your pain. Because I think what we're really doing is redefining a deeper kind of love and intimacy that actually involves being able to hold these contrasts and struggles of the human experience, to be able to feel all of that pain in a real way, and even though you felt that pain, to let it go and to love beyond that pain and to let any pain you've experienced pass, actually open you up to such a deeper kind of compassion and intimacy. And first, I would say the first gift is you let go of all those things you're holding onto and all the shame you have around that. And the first thing you'll experience is actually having a breakthrough in loving yourself and being intimate with yourself, which you might not have been for a very long time if you're always trying to be in control or trying to be perfect. So we're going to go through this exercise, and the other thing that Tantra brings us is the idea that we can be magicians, that you can take pain and turn it into compassion and intimacy and vulnerability. And there's a Tantric saying that everything in this world is poison or medicine, depending on how much you take and what you use it for. So I'm going to teach you to be a magician and to take these moments in your life where you experience pain that shut you down and shut your heart down, got you locked in this fear in your mind. You're so afraid you're going to experience the same pain again that you don't leave yourself open to anything new. So therefore, your whole life is simply repeating that same pain. It's the opposite of what you want. And I'm gonna teach you how to take that, that little bit of that poison from that pain. Just like a vaccine, you take a little bit of a poison, it actually helps you to build up that immunity and resilience to resist that disease. So we're gonna go back and experience just a little bit and allow yourself to feel that pain that you froze. And by feeling it, your heart will finally be able to untow, open and let go and be available to new experiences and to new intimacy. So this, this meditation, the Tantric heart meditation, and there's a very powerful visualization. So I want you to just close your eyes and put your hands on your heart. Now, one thing in Tantra that's also important, this is a different meditation than the other meditations you've probably been doing, because all these programs and all these meditations, they're always working with your mind. And they say, oh, your mind is so powerful. Your mind is creating all your beliefs. But what they're Bypassing is your body. Your body is real and your body never lies. Your mind actually is very clever, and it will make up all kinds of stories to avoid feeling. But your body feels all the time. And in fact, most, most of you, your body is screaming for you to feel, screaming for you. Remember me? Your body's like, hey, remember me? And when you find yourself trapped in moments of depression, all you have to do is tap into your body. Your body is joyful, your body is grateful to be alive. That deeper place in your soul and spirit is so grateful to have a body. I literally wake up every day and I say, thank you. Thank you, God, for my body, which is beautifully and wonderfully made. And through this body, I can connect to other people. And yes, sometimes it's painful, yes, sometimes I get disappointed, but that's the experience of being alive. Don't you want to feel? I always tell people, imagine that you went to a movie theater and you bought a ticket to watch a movie. And you walk in and it's just somebody staring back at you, totally calm, totally peaceful, right? That's how we think we're supposed to be. It's how we think we're supposed to be in every moment, controlling our experiences, controlling our reactions. Or we think that's what we're supposed to be in meditation. But that would be a really boring movie, right? You would be mad that you paid the price for that ticket. Well, I want you to imagine that your spirit, your soul, bought a ticket for your lifetime in this body. And this body is literally that vehicle to help you experience the world, to go on this ride, this movie of your life. And just try and remember. When you go see a movie and something horrible happens, or there's a love scene, or somebody cheats on somebody, or there's betrayal or abandonment, you feel something and maybe you cry, or maybe you're stirred to being angry, but you remember it's just a movie. It's like a great song or music. We pay for these experiences of movies and songs to help us feel. So just start doing that every day. Let go of the control of shutting down your heart through your mind and get out of that fear state and back into love, this deeper kind of love that can feel pain and experience more. There's actually a. One of my favorite quotes is that which is to give light must be able to withstand burning. So I want you to burn with the desire to feel more in your life, to have a more intimate, vulnerable, sensual life, and to be more connected to yourself, your body, to your Family to your friends, to your lovers, to your partners. To have something sacred in all of these sense, consensual connections, and to flip the script on all these ways you've learned to be ashamed of being human and to feel, because that's actually your real power. And to tap back into that power, you have to let go of some of that control, get out of your mind, and get back into that place of feeling. So the Tantra heart meditation, we're going to go through it, and I want you to know you can do this with me in the full form of the video and also use it anytime on the spot when you feel yourself shutting down and locking down from fear and helping you move through that feeling into love and into compassion and into intimacy. So I want you to take your hands and just close your eyes and touch your heart. So just touch. I call this the Tantra touch. Just touch gets you out of your head and back into your body. We have so much shame around our bodies, so just letting go of any shame of just your own body and falling in love with your own body again. Your body is here to feel and to experience. And there's nothing more beautiful in this world than two human bodies connecting. Something that we've been taught to feel ashamed about is actually our most sacred and beautiful experience, that our spirit and our soul can feel through our fingertips and feel through these magical nerve endings just touching your heart. I want you to feel how that begins to release oxytocin. Just scientifically proven, that touch around the heart releases this love and bonding hormone. And what oxytocin does is it tells you, I am safe to love, I am safe to bond. Most of us have been broken in our ability to be vulnerable and to create healthy, loving, intimate bonds. So with your hands here at your heart and feel that oxytocin filling your body. If you don't feel it, don't worry. It just means you need to practice this a little longer. I've worked with thousands of people who've had amazing breakthroughs. And sometimes on the first day, you just have to feel your numbness and have no shame around that touching your heart, I want you to take an inhale and an exhale, just letting go of any tension. You feel silly for doing this exercise or silly for anything. Just sound is like a thief. It steals the tension from your body. Now I want you to visualize in your heart is your soul. So in this Tantra visualization, your soul is the king or the queen and the ruler of your life. And as the ruler of your life, your soul, should make all the decisions, especially the important decisions about relationships or making changes in your life or taking risks in your life, because your soul is fearless. Your soul is connected to that infinite source, and it knows that you live forever. So there has no fight or flight in your soul. And your soul is sitting here in the throne room of your heart. So just visualize your soul, the king or queen, the ruler of your life, sitting on the throne of your heart, the throne of emotions and feeling and connection and bonding. And guarding the door to your heart, to the throne room is your mind. Visualize your mind as the servant whose job is to guard the door, to open and close your heart. But the problem is, for most of us, our mind, the servant, has locked the door to our heart, and now our mind of the servant, is making the choices for our life. The problem with that is our mind comes from fear and survival and fight or flight. And your mind can only make decisions based on past experiences. And for most of us, in our past, we've had moments of abandonment or disappointment that taught our mind to shut down and to lock this door to our heart. But the problem is, every day and every new moment, we treat and reenact that same moment of abandonment or pain because we're too afraid to step forward and try anything new or to unlock our hearts and be vulnerable again. Think about how that affects every new opportunity in your life. If your mind is too frightened and has locked the door to your heart. So I want you to just visualize talking to your mind that's guarding the door to your heart and saying, it's okay. I want you to first let go of any shame for the pain you may carry from the past, any abandonment, any ways you've learned to shut down and numb yourself from feeling or being vulnerable. It's okay. You did that for a reason. But now you're here and you're stronger and you're ready. Say it's okay, mind, unlock that door. Turn the doorknob. Open that door. Open my heart. And as you open the door to your heart, take a deep inhale and feel your heart expand. And exhale, just letting go all that pain and control from holding onto the past. And inhale. Open the door a little wider. Feel a little bit more. Feel it safe in this moment to open your heart and feel and exhale, just let that go. And inhale, I receive. Exhale, I give back. Inhaling, I receive love. And exhaling, I give love back. Now I want you to take this moment to do something very powerful and flip the script on your past and on your reactions. I want you to visualize the person who you first felt abandoned with. And first learn to shut your heart down and lock this door. And visualize them as if they're standing right in front of you. And feel how your body shuts down. Your body never lies. And you're not going to change this by just trying to change your beliefs and your thought patterns. You're going to have to go back and feel where you became frozen in your body. Just take an inhale and breathe in what that person elicits in your body. Inhale. Maybe it's sadness or grief or you tighten up. It's okay. Whatever you feel, even if you can't feel, if it's too scary, breathe in. That's what it feels like, that it's too scary. Breathe it in and give yourself permission. And exhale. Let it go and take three breaths right now. Inhaling. I breathe in this difficult feeling or emotion for everyone else who's ever felt this way. And exhaling. I send cooling relief to everyone else who's ever felt this way. I'm not alone. I'm not isolated in this pain. Inhale. I breathe in this difficult feeling. I let it open and melt inside me. And exhale. I send cooling relief to everyone else who ever felt this way. And inhale one last time. Inhale. I breathe in. If that person standing right in front of me. And I retrain my body. It's okay. It's okay. I don't have to shut down or put up a wall. And exhale. Sending back that cooling rel. Good. Now I just want you to take three new deep breaths, new energy. Inhale. I'm worthy of receiving new love and vulnerability and intimacy. And exhale. I am worthy of giving love back. Inhale, Breathing in. Now that you've opened the door to your heart. I'm worthy of receiving love. And exhale. I'm worthy of giving love back. And inhale. I'm not afraid of new experiences and a happier future. And exhale. I can give and share. Good. I want you to just take a moment now and open your eyes. You feel different. I feel really different. You know, I teach this because this is what I had to learn and in my life all the time. Even as a teacher, I feel when I shut down and I try and be a good teacher or a powerful person and I forget these moments when I just put down my guard and let myself be intimate with myself, that those are the most powerful that is what makes me powerful, and that is what makes you powerful. And so if we can together begin to create a world where instead of isolating around these stuck places in ourselves and these intimacy blocks, instead of having shame, just let go of all that shame around the body and the feelings and the emotions and just know that we're here to have this deeper love, deeper intimacy that comes from being able to feel pain and love beyond that pain and know that sometimes you have to make boundaries. And my teacher said there's some people you have to love at a distance with an arm's length out because you can see who they are. And that's wisdom. Sometimes wisdom is not wishing people were who you wanted them to be or that abandoned little child, and you always waiting and reenacting unhealthy patterns, that pain, you know, over and over again, waiting for someone to come save you. And instead take this moment, do the Tantra heart meditation. Give that love to yourself. And by doing that, you'll be able to share such deeper intimacy and vulnerability with everyone you meet, whether that's your children or your friends, your family or even people at work, or if it's, you know, a romantic relationship. And learning to actually drop all that shame and experience sacred sense and sacred sexuality again, flip the script on all the shame that has been programmed into you. Because I know just even talking about these things can be controversial. It's so crazy to me that this is controversial, that actually being real and authentic about being human and having desires and living in these bodies and having sensuality, that this is what we're ashamed of. You know, we've gone crazy. This shouldn't be controversial. And I want you to know, Tantra people have all these misconceptions of. Tantra is about, you know, something unachievable or ancient or having sex for nine hours sounds great, and it is possible, but that's not what it's about for most of us. This is about getting out of your head into your body, letting go of shame, letting go of that madness of being ashamed of our bodies and ourselves and actually owning our desires so that we can live the life that our soul came to live in this world, go from living in black and white and go from living in the smallness to living in Technicolor. And I work with thousands of people, and when they fall asleep on their life, when their mind shuts their. Their heart and their soul falls asleep, there's real repercussions. They have chronic fatigue, they get illnesses in their bodies, they get depression anxiety, they can't connect with their family. They're losing all that time in their life. So you have a lot to lose by trying to always be in control. You have a lot to lose when you don't wake up your soul. So this tantra meditation, this tantra heart is going to help you to have that breakthrough. And I promise you, when I say living your life in Technicolor, that means living your dreams. Whether that's success in your career or going after the things you want or attracting the right partner or finally feeling worthy of being loved or being a better parent. Whatever it is, this is going to bust that door open and break down where we have shame and help you to have that deeper intimacy and that deeper mind, body, spirit, connection that you can reclaim. So enjoy this and do it anytime that you want to have this amazing, amazing feeling of intimacy and love and connection. I'm Salma Zadora.