Aaron Doughty: Stop Waiting for Your Dream Life! How To Start NOW

Stop waiting. Just start. What are you waiting for? The more you wait, the more you're in the vibration of waiting to. The vibration of waiting and the vibration of being are two very different vibrations, no doubt, because there's no future by the time the future gets here, it's this moment right now. So as I'm waiting, I'm waiting, I'm waiting. I'm in the vibration of waiting. It's just, you stay there. The moment the reality shifts is the moment you start being it. And when you start being it, that's when you can trust the process of the divine. And I think with the Divine, it's something that as you have the courage to take the steps in that direction on your path, it reveals itself as you go. If you try to figure it all out before you do anything, that'll keep you stuck forever. And a big part of this transformation, a big part of this journey is about making the choice to live according to ideals and values that you choose to live by. But it comes with a commitment and a willingness to let go of the old story of how you see yourself. So in 2020, anybody that's listening to this right now, focus on the values of how you choose to be of this highest vibrational version of you.

Aaron Doughty, welcome to the podcast.

Thanks for having me on, Matt.

Wow. It truly feels like a time warp because I can remember, like, many years ago, I was in this place of my life where I was like, should I start? Should I stop? Yeah, should I start? Should I stop? This is the first episode of the entire new year, which is so amazing. Episode 600.

Awesome.

I'm really, like, pinching myself.

Just congratulations on 600 episodes as well.

Thank you. I'm pinching myself because there's a part of me that's like, wow, what if I never started? Yeah. Well, what a loss that would be to myself, to my soul, to. To this audience, to the world, if I didn't actualize my gifts.

Right.

So it's a really special jumping off point for this conversation, man. Over 2,000 plus videos that you've done on YouTube and probably by now close to 2 million subscribers. Like this, this little clip that I found in preparation for the podcast, it was you saying, like, okay, well, stop waiting, just start. Literally, stop waiting, just start. And I thought, what a great way to start the new year for all the people that are maybe facing themselves for like the 20, 30, 40, 50th time. Yeah. Do you remember when that concept came online for you? Like, I'm not waiting Anymore. I'm literally just going to start.

Yeah, and think about this too. Like, you could have waited to start and this would be episode maybe 240 or something. Do you know what I mean? Like, maybe eventually with your path, you would have started regardless. But the fact that you started when you did start is a reflection of where you are now. And same for me, like my. I've. I knew back in 2017 when I made the choice, and in February of 2017, while working my 9 to 5 job selling women's shoes, I made the choice to start. And that's when things started to grow. That's when, in a way, the timeline opened up. I think about it in the form of like, almost like a timeline in a way, because we get in life a reflection of who we are being. And when I was being a 9 to 5 job goer, my reality was 9 to 5 job goer selling women's shoes. I thought, felt, and acted equal to that reality. The moment I started was the moment I started to be a new version of myself. And as I committed to that timeline is as I had the courage and the fears that came up. There were a lot of fears, like I'm sure there were with you too, where once you start putting yourself out there, you're like, what do people think of me? What if I'm not. I don't feel credible enough? Imposter syndrome comes up, all of these blocks come up. And normally what will happen is those blocks will come up and it's common to then say, oh, there's something wrong. There's a. There's this fear, when in actuality, the fear, it's never going to go away. It's just as you move through it, your sense of what brings you fear kind of expands. So it almost expands to include that. So for me, when I started stepping into that version of myself, it's like I started to redefine myself and. And as I started to learn and break through the blocks and the stories, like, I don't know how to edit, I don't know how to do this. What'll this person think of me? All of these things. As I committed and had the courage to do that, it began to redefine myself in many different ways. So for me, the exact moment was also something we were talking about a couple minutes ago before the podcast started was like the moment of what drove me to make that decision was probably pain. It was the pain of. Of me realizing how similar my childhood dynamic was to the 9 to 5 job that I Had. So growing up, I had control in my life from 7 to 15. Had an ex stepmom that was very controlling. Weren't allowed to have friends. My brother and I had to earn going to school activities. We would like sneak food just to get enough food to eat because we were given like a bowl of cereal in the morning, TV dinner at night. So we were very malnourished. When my dad divorced when I was 15, my brother and I gained like £20 basically within like three months, you know. But that control, and here's some interesting things too. Life wasn't fair. Some 7 to 15, my dad divorced her. All of a sudden I had all this freedom. There's something a little bit anxiety that came with that freedom too. For some reason. It was like Stockholm syndrome. Well, then the managers and the. The place, like the place I worked was just Nordstrom's in women's shoes. And then I went to Barney's New York in women's shoes. And those are pretty much my two jobs before I went full time on YouTube. The managers at the job that I had were controlling. You had to suck up to get the schedule that you wanted. In the same way with my ex stepmom that you had to kind of suck up if you wanted to go to like band camp or some shit. It was like the. The childhood dynamics were so similar and I was aware. I was like, whoa, I'm like walking on eggshells around management. And it was corrupt too. Like when I was at Nordstrom's, especially if we were to go up to the H R and say something about the way that we were being treated by the manager. And she could. She should have got fired way before she did, but for the things that she'd make people cry, the way she would talk to people. If we went up to upper management and said anything, we would get in trouble. We would get like. It would get it even worse. We. One lady went up to HR once that I worked with and she started getting closing shifts every single day, which is the worst shift to get as commission jobs. So to close wasn't good. So she would like tattle, I guess, or tell hr. She then got caught and she was protected by upper management, this manager. So what happened is they would then get it worse, right? When I was 7 to 15 years old, if we were to tell someone about what was happening in the household, we would get in trouble. We'd get it even worse. So I'm like starting to become aware. I started meditating, started becoming aware of just how Similar it was. And I woke up to that. And then what happened is I got in trouble for something where I. Working at Barney's New York in women's shoes. It was so slow that a lot of us would like, we'd go into the. It'd be for like five hours, not a single customer come on the floor. So sometimes we'd go into the back stock room and we'd be on our phones and one person would be on the sales floor and one person would be in the back. So the floor is still being covered. I was in the back on my, my cell phone once and we all were a lot. And we were actually encouraged to do business out of our phone. So it was kind of this weird thing. But basically what happens, I get brought up to the. The managers, I get called up to the office. The store manager, the HR manager and my department manager are there and they have this projector up on the screen and they aaron, we want you to watch something real quick with us. And I'm like, okay. I knew I was getting written up for something. And basically what they did is they had a. They had like a 10 minute video of me on my phone and the camera was going straight down and you could see what I was scrolling on Instagram with. You could see that I was scrolling on Instagram. And for the first minute I'm like, okay, I get the point. You guys can write me up. I guess I wasn't supposed to be on my phone, even though we're supposed to be in our phones and if someone was on the sales floor, you can still write me up. And they're like, no, we want us to sink in for you. So they wanted me to sit there for another like 10 minutes and watch in silence this awkwardness as I'm like scrolling through Instagram as they can see what I'm scrolling through on Instagram on this camera.

And.

And in that moment, it was so painful and I felt so belittled. And I realized that this is also the way I was treated growing up. There's this like, kind of background correlation there that in the moment, what I decided is I decided in six months from now, I am not going to be talked to like this ever again. Like, I will do what it takes to where I don't ever have to get talked to like this again. I will be my own boss. That experience right there was one of the motivating factors where I realized I do not like working for someone else. And working for someone else isn't the worst thing I realized, you know, I had a commission job because I liked having somewhat control over my paycheck. I never liked, like, this is how much you make, and this is how much you'll always make.

Sure.

But it was interesting because the. The moment I decided that was the moment things started opening up for me. And then as I was on my spiritual awakening journey and I was watching YouTube videos of other creators that had already started, I'm like, why not me? That was the first thing is like, why not me? Like, of course I'm like, well, that's this person. That's.

Who are you watching? Who was it?

Ralph Smart? At the time, it was Ralph Smart. Teal Swan.

They're like, swan.

Yeah. Yeah. They've been. They've been in the game a long time. So back in 2012, all the way to 2015, 2017, they were like, in the space. When I got in on YouTube and I started making Law of attraction videos, it wasn't the plan to make Law of attraction videos. It was a plan of just making videos. And then what would happen is I just started kind of making videos on many different topics. And then Law of Attraction videos. I realized I was passionate about sharing what I was learning while working my 9 to 5 job, because I started every day. I went into my commission job. You start at zero. So every day I get to practice the Law of Attraction and I notice patterns. If I go in and my intention is to make money, and I want to make $5,000 in sales, because that's $500 a commission. If I have that intention or if I have the intention of adding value and having fun and connecting with my customers, I get a different result. So I would. I would share that on my channel. So I wasn't the guru at the top of the mountain that lived in the. Had a Lamborghini and lived in, like, a fat crib. Yeah, I was living at my dad's house, but I was vulnerably sharing what I was learning with the Law of Attraction while selling women's shoes. And that became my content. And as I was sharing that, more and more people were interested in that. And then I just kept making videos that the people wanted more videos of, and I was passionate about making. And it kind of took on a life of its own through starting. So when I started my first video ever, it's was on, like, how to find your purpose or something. And in the middle of the video or the very bottom, it says first blog post. The only reason it says first blog post is because I didn't know how to edit and I almost wasn't going to put the video up because I'm like, it says first blog post. It's embarrassing. Like, yes. So instead what I did is I said, screw it, I'm starting anyways. And every day I'd made a video because I committed to making a video every single day on YouTube, no matter what. Back in February 2017, within three months I was, you know, my, my YouTube channel started to pick up. Within six months, I had a hundred thousand on YouTube plus. And in August of 2017 was when I put my two weeks in at my nine to five job. My last day of work was the Conor McGregor Mayweather fight. I don't know if you remember that. The boxing fight match.

Yeah, yeah.

I want. I lived in Vegas, born and raised. So like, at working on the Strip, it was in Vegas, so it was going to be busy and it was commission job. So I said, I want to work. So before I put in my two weeks, I scheduled a month before to get that data open so that I could. My last day was the Conor McGregor Mayweather fight. I, two weeks before that, put in my two weeks. And that was a huge moment for me, was going in and my managers and people kind of knew I had a YouTube channel because they could, like, it was kind of getting around that I did because I was starting to grow. I had like 50, 60, 70,000 subs. You know, I, I remember thinking, they're going to be like, happy for me, you know what I mean? Or like they're going to care at all, you know. But I remember going in, I'm like, I just want, you know, I'm. I'm putting in my two weeks. Here's why, you know, and one person was. But everyone else was just like, you know, you're not. It was almost like, you're dead to me. You're dead to me kind of energy. And I'm like, okay, well I'm. I'm done with this energy, you know. But anyways, so what I did is my last day was the Conor McGregor Mayweather fight. I opened that day, think I sold $6,000 with a shoe. So I made like 300 bucks or something like that. Or actually that was smaller commission than Nordstrom's, but it was something, you know, I made good money and then went to my friend's house afterwards, watched the fight, and that was my last day ever having a 9 to 5 job. But that kind of like process for me was fueled a little bit by the pain of not liking the situation I was at.

Yeah.

And also being able to see, if I don't start, if I stay where I'm at, I don't start. My future is looking at me, right in front of me. The people I worked with that sold women's shoes, they're awesome people, but most of them didn't want to be there. They were 50, 40, 30. You know, I was, like, 28 years old when I were 27, 28 years old when I went full time. So everyone I worked with was in their 30s, 40s, or 50s. Only one person loved selling women's shoes, and guess who that was.

Al Bundy.

Yes. The top salesperson, because he enjoyed it. Yes.

Yeah.

Yeah, she enjoyed it. She loved it. She was super passionate about it. Whereas everyone else was just there because they felt trapped. Like they. They had to. That's all they knew how to do.

So good.

So it's like I was looking around. I'm like, if I don't start, this is what happens. And, you know, you want to know partially what it was too, now that I think about it. There's a book that Gary Vaynerchuk wrote called Crush it, and it was all about, like. It was just that, the hustle mentality that I needed to hear, because I was, like, for years, this spiritual guy that was, like, studying spirituality and stuff and meditation, and it was like this think better thought philosophy that I was trying out. Like, think about it, think about it, think about it. But nothing was happening. And then what I needed to hear, though, was to crush it, to take massive action. And then in 2017, I started taking massive action. And that's when things. So it's massive action mixed with alignment of, like, a purpose and having the vision.

Yeah.

But massive action was what I needed to hear because I was the guy that was kind of, like, meditating and hoping, and I had, like. I was visualizing all these, like, things. I was like, I'm gonna meet Tony Robbins one day or. Or this person. We're selling women's shoes, you know? And it's funny because I ended up eventually helping Sage Robbins, his wife, and I ended up helping Jack Canfield, who's also motivational speaker. It was super cheesy. I remember telling him, one day, I'm gonna do what you do. And it was. I looked back. I can't believe I said that. But funny enough, like, years later, I get invited to a mastermind in Costa Rica that he was doing, that he was. That he was a part of. And I remember thinking, to myself, man, things have come full circle because I was like, I'm gonna. I'm that cheesy guy that's like, one day I'm gonna do what you do. And he. He gave me his card and was like, I. He teaches, like, people how to speak or something. He gave me his card and said it was like $20,000 to go to Scottsdale to do this. I was like, I don't have $20,000. I'm not gonna do that. You know, I'm not doing it. But I remember that experience and just like, how I really thought, like, someone was gonna put me on or it was like this, this fairy tale idea, not realizing that it's all about who you become in the process. So because of that, though, I had to let go of a lot of the visions, the ideas. You know, there's people that want to manifest the lottery and all these things, and it's like so far off from like, what we're actually, I think, meant to be doing and the person that we become in the process of starting. But starting is really the thing that opens up a new timeline. Starting is the thing that puts you into a new energy. And the thing that stops that starting is the self sabotage, the imposter syndrome, the fear. Basically everything that feels familiar to childhood, you know, everything that feels safe, what.

We consider safe, but it's not 100% childhood. There is an amalgamation of, like, current life experiences that all stack on to the imprinting that creates the beliefs about who we actually are.

Absolutely.

So I can flashback and be like, okay, for me, money was pain. Money meant suffering, money. My dad loved money. He was disassociated from his family. My mom was manic bipolar. She always used to say that rich people are evil, rich people are bad. So for me, I had this massive money story that I got to get over in order to be doing what we're doing now. If I would have believed, if I would have continued to believe that story about what money was or really my worthiness when it came to money, you and I would not be sitting here. There was some kind of like a. I'm curious how you feel about this. There was some kind of deep heart centered soul choice point inside of me that it wasn't just my away from the pain, it was also towards the pleasure that I knew was possible.

Right.

They were both like, kind of at play. And. And for you, when you were like, okay, I will not be shamed anymore. I will not be recorded and shamed in front of a bunch of managers, there was also probably an equal or maybe even greater than part of you that knew that there was this life of abundance.

Oh, 100%.

Which one was the fuel source? Were they both the fuel source?

I'm someone that generally. That generally likes to just focus on the good of, like, the motivation towards whatever I want. At the same time, I was just aware that that painful experience was, like, kind of what woke me up to then focus on how good things could be. So for me, and I've said this in different ways, and I always stand by this, but the biggest shift in my life that ever happened, and the biggest shift I think happens in anyone's life, for the most part, seems to be a common trend, is when you start doing what you love and you buy your time back, that is even more rewarding than if you go from. From making like 50,000 a year to 100,000 a year, to 10 to a million a year. Like, the biggest shift is when you buy your time back. That's what it was for me. So for me, when I was working eight hours a day, sitting around where it wasn't that busy, and I'm like, what am I doing here? Especially when I started making videos because, like, I could be making more videos, the vision I had was being able to eat lunch when I want to eat lunch, not being told, you have only an hour to eat lunch. That for me was like, ooh, that felt like freedom. Being able to travel and go where I want to go when I want to go there, not having to get two weeks of vacation a year, that felt like freedom to be able to share my ideas on YouTube and to be able to, like, eventually knowing that I want to do live events and I want to interact with people in a different way to, like, impact people in that way. There was definitely visions of that. You know, like when in 2017, when I had the vision of it, one thing I did, living in my dad's house, I remember my sister saw it and she made fun of me for it, was I got on what you call it Photoshop, a YouTube channel of somebody that had, like, 200,000 subs, and I edited their photo and my photo, put my photo over it and put that as the desktop of my computer. So every day I look at it, be like, visualizing 200,000 on YouTube or something like that. Actually, I think it was like 134,000 or something like that. That's what the number was, something like that. Some odd, odd number. And it was just my photo over that on My wallpaper. One time, my sister came into my room and she's like. She thought it was real. Like, just sit on the desktop. You know what I mean? She's like. She was like, super surprised, and I was like, no, it's. It's this. It's just a. It's just this thing that I'm doing to visualize it. You know what I mean? But, like, visualizing that goal was definitely something that, like, brought me a certain level of fulfillment, a certain level of. Of drive. But for me, it's always been freedom. Freedom from. Whether it's a job or freedom from limitations or freedom from posture syndrome or whatever. But the freedom from that is also representative of doing what I want, when I want to do it with no one else telling me what to do. Me getting to be my own authority, I. I love that I could never go back to anything else once I've had a taste of that. But I. That's what I. That's how I choose to live my life. That's how I love living.

That choice, though, that you made in 2017. And I'm speaking to everybody who's watching or listening right now that's like, okay, it's a brand new year. Am I going to live a mirror of last year's year again? Or am I actually going to take a deep breath, fly 30,000ft above my life, and look down at what needs to be moved, what needs to be let go of? There is a massive, massive, massive inventory process that we all get to go through. Yeah, I did for sure. I know you did. And all of us do. When there's like, almost like a Radio Flyer wagon filled with concrete of shit that's killing us.

Yeah.

We look at it and we're like, well, I'll take care of it eventually. What is it that that is in our psyche? I don't know if it's a negativity bias, if it's just the imprinting of our past from childhood that keeps us stuck where we are. But almost after a while, like that Radio Flyer wagon with the concrete in it, it becomes normal. It's like. It's like, oh, this is just how it's supposed to be, you know? What is that about the human psyche with, like 2,000 plus videos and leading people and also being interviewed and interviewing, being on probably podcasts with other people, being in roundtables with people like Jack Canfield and whatnot. There has got to be, Aaron, a common thread that allows us to finally cut the cord of that wagon with the Stuff that by the way, we filled it up in the first place.

Right? Yeah.

How do we do that?

Yeah. For, for me, what it's been a process of is really going inwards to look at these patterns, to look at the patterns and to become aware of them. So like metacognition, like becoming aware of what I'm thinking of, becoming aware of what I'm feeling, and also becoming aware of the reflection I'm getting in my life and what that reflects back to me. It's like a process of self inquiry. A lot of it too. Like I remember, even with the whole 9 to 5 job situation, I remember realizing I, that I had this like big resentment towards my childhood because of 7 to 15 thing and ex stepmom thing. But then realizing that there was always a level of control in my life that was there until I became aware of it. Once I became aware of it, it's like the spell started to break. And so it was after my ex stepmom left my life at 15, I had a girlfriend in my life, an ex girlfriend for five years. And she was jealous. She wasn't physically abusive or manipulative like the ex stepmom, but she was very jealous and controlling. And for five years she was in my life. At the end of that, I broke up with her. And within one week of breaking up with her, I was working in brass plum shoes at Nordstrom's. I got which is like the cheaper shoe department. I got transferred to a better shoe department, designer shoes for women's shoes, which is more commission, more money. And I go over, I get transferred within one week of breaking up with that ex girlfriend. And then I go to a department where that manager was the one I was talking about, where she was controlling, manipulative and protected by upper management. So I remember looking at my past and noticing a core thread of these different patterns and then asking myself why? What about this is familiar for me? This is must be a familiar energy. And the thing that got brought back to my mind is there was this moment back in, when I was 15 years old, when my dad was divorced, my ex stepmom, where we had just moved out of this house and we went with my brother and my dad and we lived in this like small two three bedroom house. It was a three bedroom, 1100 square foot house with my grandparents, with my sisters and my dad and my brother. And we were just living there until we found another place where we figured out the divorce stuff. We go back to the house that I like grew up at to get Our clothes. And I remember in this weird moment, my ex stepmom and her mom were like throwing their clothes at my brother and I in the dirt and stuff like that. And it was like this dramatic thing. But in that moment, what was really weird about it is as dramatic as that was the memory of like me being in that house with my brother and us having to sneak food or us having to like sneak watching television where one of us would have like our finger on the remote control where it said previous channel. So if someone came home from work, we would push the button back to the channel it was on so they didn't know what we were watching television. We throw the remote and run outside. What came to my mind in that moment was that even though we. That was like the way we lived, there was something about it that felt safe. And that's what they call Stockholm syndrome. So in an interesting way, when I was 15 years old, I was allowed to have friends. All of a sudden I. I went from having. Being allowed to have no friends to all of a sudden being allowed to have friends, being allowed to watch television, being allowed to eat enough food and have second third helpings, being allowed to go to school activities, not having to earn it. It was like a whole new world. But with that whole new world came anxiety. And I remember that anxious feeling. It was like there was a part of me that preferred to be with my hand on the remote with previous channel. Like, like in that. In that. Because it felt safe. It was the known. And in a weird way, once I had my spiritual awakening in 2012, I looked back and I could see that I always had someone in my life to give me the parameters of control. Even though it was no longer my ex stepmom, I could see that it just different people. I would attract this into my life because it felt safe, it felt familiar. So the process for me has been a lot of looking at the patterns in my life, like somebody, let's say. And does it always come from childhood? I don't think we need to be like Sherlock Holmes, like going into our childhood and looking for problems that may not even really be active anymore. But in general, it is interesting to me that a lot of the patterns I notice in people's lives, whether it's people that watch my YouTube channel or my own lives, there's a reflection from childhood that, that it comes from, like when you were talking about, you know, the, the money beliefs from your parents, even though your dad really liked money and that made him emotionally unavailable or disassociative. Because of it, there were still meanings that you derived from that experience that came from childhood. Sure, Right.

Of course.

Even. And even though it evolves as you go on, you know, as you get older, you evolve your sense of identity, your sense of what money is through reference experiences. But I find that a lot of times, unless we do the inner child work or we. There's like a. In my. For my case, there was like an inner child part of myself that felt very scared to, like, be in the unknown. I felt very scared to express themselves because I was told children are meant to be seen and not heard growing up, you know, so, like, there was these aspects of myself that I could tell were kind of frozen back in time. So for me, it's been a process of just becoming aware of the patterns, whether it is in my childhood or it's in my immediate life. Like, if someone's a people pleaser, for example, probably maybe did stem from childhood sometimes. Because people pleasers sometimes come from parent pleasers.

Yeah.

You know, but nonetheless, it's like, why am I. Why am I changing myself to make someone else happy? Why am I being fake to, like, get someone else's validation or approval? And we don't ask ourselves the questions like, why do I even want their validation or approval? Yeah, what does their validation approval mean to me? Can they even really give it to me? And these are things that as we start to ask ourself, we start to kind of unravel the belief systems. Because at the fundamental core, I believe that our beliefs create our reality. So getting to the core of those beliefs are where the power is. And those beliefs a lot of times are stemmed from childhood in the sense that we adopt the belief of our parents. Many of the patterns we have, we adopted for them subconsciously. And we either reject it, sometimes we reject it, sometimes we embrace it. And sometimes we're not even aware that even rejecting. Even if we reject what they. The patterns they have, we end up still kind of carrying that energy.

Well, because literally, I think it was Confucius, if you hold resentment, you're the one getting burned.

Exactly.

So you're actually attached to your dad, to your mom, to someone else because you're the one holding it. It's burning my flesh if I'm choosing to hold the hot stone.

Yeah.

And that's the trippiest part about most things that you've said ring so true. But I want to, like, challenge you because it's fun.

Yeah.

There's so much about childhood being like a permanent imprint. Do you believe that because of neuroplasticity and also your own training, that we fundamentally can change it permanently in the other direction. So, for example, if somebody has been through severe sexual trauma, severe physical abuse, severe mental abuse, I mean, you shared what was, what was real for you. And look, I'm not here to say that capital T, lowercase T trauma is better than or less than. There's varying degrees of trauma, whether it's micro trauma or macro trauma. Do you think that with the right kind of support, with the right kind of healing tools, that people truly can go the other way permanently?

I believe it is possible. I believe it is possible that our stored and the learned behaviors, emotions and energies that we experience as kids that may be reverberated stories and patterns of energy in the body. I believe that as we process them and integrate them, we can release it from our field and we can become more free. And I think that with when it comes to this energy as well, it's something that neuroscience is starting to look more and more into. When it comes to quantum physics, where every time we look at something that happened in our past. And we remember a past experience, it's like we take it out of our memory bank. We look at the memory, or what we think of as the memory. We slightly change it based on the story we have about it, and then we put it back in the memory bank. So by the time we've thought of something, 10 times, 15 times, 20 times, 100 times, 500 times, it's a completely different memory than what actually may have even happened. So as we do the inner work in the present moment, what gets interesting to me and kind of the work of where my content's headed nowadays. Is like, little bit different than kind of the traditional route. Where I'm really looking at what quantum physics is showing us about the present moment right now, which is that right now, this moment exists. And every time we connect to the past. What if the past is. Is. It isn't as solid as we think it is? What if there are an infinite number of what quantum physics is showing us? There's an infinite number of parallel realities that exist. There are many different timelines we could experience in the future. But by the time it's the future, it won't be the future. It'll be this moment right now. But when we start, we kind of activate that timeline to come into our aware. But what if in a similar way, as we change in the present moment, we also change the past that we connect to? We think of our Past as this solid thing. But there may have been us that had many different versions of our own past. So in an interesting way, that's something I'm. I'm kind of playing around with now in especially guided meditations. Because guided meditations for me have been one of the most powerful transformative thing that I've either experienced myself or I do with group last amounts of people. One of my favorite things to do is live group meditations with hundreds of people in a room. It. There's something about the ma. The energy of it. There's something about the belief of it, the, the mind and heart coherence of it that just has this effect that creates a safe container where people just start popping and these like, like miraculous things happen where people say these crazy, like they have crazy transformations. And it's just, I believe, from the safe space and the, the open of possibility of what could happen in a meditative state. But nonetheless, like the way that people relate to their past can change dramatically based on meditation, energy, emotion inside of the body, but also reframing and recontextualizing, which is kind of a mental thing that sometimes I, I think it is like a very much a body thing. Which is why breath work is so powerful, because when you release it. I've had experiences where, when I do breath work or when I get certified in breathwork even, I had crazy life changing things happen afterwards as I released energy that was inside of my body that I believe came from my mom's side, my mom's lineage of the family.

Oh, this is so big. Wait, I gotta stop you right here because. Okay, what you're talking about is literally reprogramming your somatics.

Yes.

So that you are integrating and releasing some of the blockages, big or small, that were potentially even at your level, holding you back from creating. And that can definitely be something that no matter where any creator is, they can do that. Because it's almost like. And I wonder how you feel. It's almost like when you start to reorganize all of the different blocks in yourself to where you actually truly, energetically, physically, spiritually become a conduit that's clean and clear, then anything that is destined to happen can happen. But when you're blocked, when we're kind of like almost like when you plug a plug into the wall, if it's dirty, no electricity will flow.

Yes.

So when we do that clearing, whether it's breath work or guided meditation, I know that a lot of people in our circle have gone very deep into Dispenza. I don't know if you've done that, but. But I wonder how you feel about this when you reorganize, Aaron. When I reorganize, Josh, the world reorganizes itself around us. It's not just a spiritual concept. There is some quantum science behind it.

Yes.

When we change us, the world changes how it meets us.

Yes.

It's real. I mean, I've experienced this, for sure.

Yeah.

What do you make of that?

I agree completely. I think that it's. It's always been interesting to me that the biggest shifts in my life have come as a result of big inner shifts within myself and the degree to which I'm able to own a lot of those patterns, as well as something that was like a perception I was seeing the world as. It's true that, like, our world changes as we change, which is why a lot of times people are like, I want to change the world. I want to change the planet. I want to do this or do that. But it's like they're going out to do that and that. It's not. They're searching for something that. That's backwards. It can only happen from the inside out.

Yeah.

So the. In a lot of. I will say this as well. I think everybody has the ability to do this. But in 2017, when I started with daily videos, it was like a part of me was opening myself up to allowing information to come through because I had intention, an intention of adding value to other people. So in an interesting way, I believe that our vessel becomes more clear. It's like the universe will use you to add value to more people, because at the fundamental core, I believe we're all one consciousness. So it's like the universe goes where you can remain pure in the intention to add value to the whole. So when people ask me, especially when I started making daily YouTube videos, because I made daily YouTube videos for three or four years straight, every single day, no matter what. And people would say, how do you do that? That's crazy that you have this ability to do it. And I'm like, what are you talking about? Like, it's not hard. It's just a natural part of my identity. But also, I just show up every day in the ideas come. I don't plan out my videos months or weeks in advance. Like, I made a video this morning before I came here, and I just got in front of the camera and just a video came through, and, like, it just happens. I'm not saying that because it makes.

Me cooler and you also sharpen that skill over time.

That's probably a part of it as well. But Even back in 2017, it's like the more I showed up for other people to add value, the more ideas were given to me. And what I've realized, though, is that my content, the times it's remained stagnant are times that I've remained stagnant. So if I want my content to evolve, what I had to do is I had to evolve and I had to grow more spiritually. I had to grow more or. Or go deeper within myself. And part of the way that looked, too, is like, my old identity. So I had the identity of that 9 to 5 job back in the day. Then I shifted into, like, being a YouTuber, and that was my identity. And I was making lots of videos in that frequency. But then eventually that got kind of boring where that's all I was doing and I wasn't really growing because I'd made so many videos. It kind of felt like clockwork. I sharpened that axe so many times.

Yes.

That last year I was like, I knew, I've always known that my eventual thing I move into is live events, running live in person events. And there were blocks to even starting that. There was like, I got to expand the team, you know, online. There's no real big expenses. I do it on Zoom, and 99% of it is profit or whatever. Like, now doing a live event, you know, you might have to put 80 to $100,000 down just to own. Just to have an event space that can hold 500 people.

Yeah.

You know, so it's different. And there were lots of blocks. But as this. This last summer, I did two or three events back to back. And as I did that, it completely shifted my identity. But interestingly enough, as well as I got into the frequency of that part of myself, it grew my sense of, like, self, my sense of presence, it grew my content, it grew everything. Because everything in our life is a reflection of our energy. And anytime anything stagnant in my life, it's because there's some part of myself that's stagnant. There's some part of myself that's stubborn, that's not letting go of something, that's not looking at something, that's trying to remain safe in the familiar. And no longer is the familiar the ex stepmom situation or the 9 to 5 job situation, but now the familiar is the control I put on myself to make daily videos of this thing that, like, the way that I'm relating To it isn't resonating anymore. Now it's. It's. I've shifted it to where now it's. It's more so like, how am I growing? I'm still making YouTube videos, but I'm doing it in a very different way now. Where now it's back to the basics of it. It's an end. It's an end of itself. It's like the passion of adding value to people. Not, like, how many views can this get? Which sometimes happens on the path to success. Where then it's like becomes about the outcome, about the pressure.

For sure. Like, if I interview this person or if I do this thing, then I'll get this many followers. Like, holy 2017, 2018. For me, I was that guy.

Yeah.

I was him, y'. All. Like, I would do anything I could to grow.

Yeah.

And then in like 2019, when I got with Carrie Michelle and then 2020 when she got pregnant, I just let all that go. Yeah.

What was it you think that helped you let it go? Was it just the.

I'll tell you what it is.

Yeah.

There. There was a part of me that knew that I was about to step into being a father.

Yeah.

And that any kind of self serving, egoic growth for just growth's sake was not going to be what I wanted to show my son.

Isn't that interesting that it was for someone else or for someone else.

But it was also because I had experienced from my father the imprinting of. Well, this is what happens when you make money or an external locus of a goal. The number one thing.

Yeah.

Instead of, I deem success and I wonder how you feel. I deem success as like health, wealth, wealth, meaning, like also time rich and money rich. And then also the quality of my relationships, both intimate friendship and personal. If I have all of that, I'm successful. It doesn't fucking matter if I have a million subscribers or not. None of that shit matters.

Yeah.

What really matters is like, do I love my day? Can I come to the studio and do a great podcast and go home? And can I enjoy myself? Like, is it actually enjoyable? And the old way of like chasing the numbers. No, that's not enjoyable because there's always like this, like, almost like a breath roller coaster where I could never, like, catch my breath. And now I'm just like, the least thing I ever want to be is famous. I don't give a shit about being famous. I want to be known. But because I want to be known because I'm coming from a place of peace and honesty.

Right.

And then I can show that to my kids and then when I'm gone, maybe they carry that on in some way. Yeah, but that's really success. And yeah, you know, for, for everyone like, who's like recapitulating about what their 2024 is going to be. It's like, hey, really take an honest inventory of what you actually think success is. It's great to have a goal of, you know, 100 and 100,000 views. That was your initial goal with your copy paste, right? 134,000.

Yeah.

There's. There's somewhat of a timeline that I think we all must go on where we have to go through, through these kind of egoic phases.

Yeah.

And then once you get to a point where some people go into philanthropy, at that point they're like, okay, I've made all my money, so now I'm going to give back. I just want to call on that. I think we can have better self awareness along the way.

100. And enjoy the process along the way.

Yes.

For so long I was so it was interesting because it. Based on everything that you're saying right now, I. It's. It's been true in my life as well. When it was that there was the ego was always looking to one up wherever I was, because where I was just wasn't good enough. So once I hit 100,000 on YouTube, I was like, well, okay, but what about 200,000? You know what I mean? And then I hit 200,000, I was like, well, 250,000 is like a quarter of a million. That'd be cool. And I want half a mil. And then it was like this thing. And every single time I hit that number or the, you know, everything grew to that number. It felt zero different. But I still felt like it wasn't enough. And there was this part of myself that both wanted to add value to people, but I think part of the deeper aspect of my shadow was that part of adding value to people was my way of being worthy and being enough. So like, I didn't feel like I had like a fair childhood and I didn't feel enough growing up. So if I can add value to all these people that watch my videos, they're going to see the value in me and they're going to tell, give me all these nice comments and things like that. It was like a subconscious thing. I wasn't conscious, like make videos, got to get views, got to get attention. It was the subconscious thing under the surface. But I remember that Once the, for a long time, eventually it was the gold play button on YouTube, the million plaque. And I remember that for a long time I'd focus on that and I could tell that my energy was literally butchering up the vibration of my channel. Like I could tell that I was making videos. Some of them that you knew would.

Be clickbaity or something.

Exactly, clickbaity. Or like I thought that would just get views. You know, what's funny is eventually I was like really trying or wanting that and then eventually I just said screw it and I let go. And funny enough, once I let go of outcome and once I let go of even that knowing kind of knowing beforehand, once I get the gold plaque button, it's still not gonna feel any different. That's when things started growing even faster. So it's almost like the more you can let go of the control, the more you can let go of outcome. The more things come, the more, the more synchronicities come. So for you, it was like you realize you were having a kid and you couldn't be in that selfish energy anymore. And it was for them. For me, it was like also the pain of real life. Not the pain, but like every time it was kind of like an apathy. Every time it got to the point to where when I got the gold plaque button, I almost didn't even allow myself to celebrate it because I was so kind of ashamed that for like months I, you know, for a while, like years ago, I was like really visualizing that.

Huh.

But for me, I guess that was also a symbol of the impact because the thing I'm really passionate about, like my degree of success is am I in the frequency of doing what I love and does that add value to other people? Because I really do enjoy simplifying esoteric concepts that add value. So a lot of the, in my business, even when I'm talking to my team, a lot of the decisions we make are around, does this, is this going to impact more people? That's. Those are the questions. I always love impacts. Like I could have. There's so many things in business I could do. Like one of them, everyone in, in my niche would have. Like a lot of people have like, you know, a thousand hour coaching packages and this and that for like high level coaching. I don't do that because I'm not passionate about that. And I just like to impact more people so I don't put my energy into that. Yeah. But part of that I think is the self awareness of what does help fulfill me and what fulfills me is what I really love doing is I love doing large group containers of like creating safe space for people to heal and through live in person events. Live zoom, like. Like live Zoom, like chat 21 day challenges and things like that. And live global meditations. Like last week or a week and a half ago, when everything was going on in the world, I wanted to get a group unity meditation together. And I have this belief, or it's kind of a more esoteric concept, but the collective consciousness we're all connected to, when we bring in that clear our vessels and bring in high vibrational energy, it comes into our reality and it has a powerful effect on not only us, but also reality. So when everything was going down and everything was so politically charged and everything, it's like let's get together on the YouTube channel. And we had three. I promoted it for two or three days. We had 3,000 people that were live in the moment there. But then we also had. It was. It was really cool. We had somebody in Japan who transcribed some of my videos and dubs over it in Japanese. And she was live streaming my video, my live. The live meditation. She had 900 people in Japan doing the meditation as well. So we had 4, 000 people meditating on unity, peace and love and bringing that energy into their bodies to also send it into the planet with all this chaos that's happening. And the people that did it had such powerful experiences through the. Not through me, through the group energy of us all coming together. And it was so cool to experience that, that it's like there's something there when it comes to the safety or the group intent and tension or the group energy. But for me, that is so fulfilling. Like it was at the end of it. We did this meditation. At the end of it. I put on Imagine by John Legend, John Lennon, like. Like in. You know, towards the end. And we all just kind of soaked in that energy, you know, it was so emotional. People were crying, I was like tearing. It was just this experience that was like collective. And I think when we move into that energy of wanting to add value for other people and to be a part of something greater than ourselves, it just. It's like the universe just comes through in a different way. You know, with the Maharishi effect, for example, the meditation effect, the Maharishi effect, when 5,000 people get together and meditate on peace and love in the world, it can decrease violent crimes by a substantial percentage for days afterwards. So the Schumann resonance, which is the frequency of the planet is something that can measure this. So I'm passionate about doing large group meditations to where we influx the Schumann resonance. And we can create that in the world. Especially when there's chaotic energy happening and everything set to divide people, to create more division or to create more, you know, fear and anger and all this energy, we come together. That's how I think we really change the planet. And also there's a side effect that happens to the people that do it. So it's like, it's not that we're all just selflessly doing it for everyone else that's part of it, but we get the benefit of bringing that energy into our bodies and clearing our vessel, which then clears what we perceive of like we were talking about a little bit ago.

I feel like we get stuck in human beings. I don't know if you consider yourself to be a human being at this point. We get stuck in a dichotomy of like, it either has to be this way or this way.

Right.

And I remember when I went through NLP training this year, they talked about, like, this false dichotomy that so many of us operate on. And some people in the spiritual world might call it like the illusion of separation. Right. There is no such thing as love and there is no such thing as fear. There's just these two things. You either choose one, I think that's in the middle. I think it's more something like a singularity. And I think God experiences God's self in unlimited ways. There is no way to describe exactly why you and I are here doing what we're doing. There's no way to describe it. Unless you are just coming from a place of curiosity and love.

Yeah.

There's no other way to describe it. Why do horrible things happen to people in the world? Why do we even need this Maharishi effect? Why do you even need to do what you do? It's because you are an opposing force to, I guess you could say the evil or the darkness or the lower vibrational frequencies that exist on planet Earth. It's like we need the balance. We need the show to go on in some way.

You know, what's interesting about that is because there. There's a lot of, like, conspiracy theory, you know, perspectives and all of this stuff that of everything that's happening in an interesting way. I believe that what if when we signed up to be a part of this, you know, we forget who we are to remember who we are? You know, spiritual awakening? If we believe that. Right. What if the people that are here that are playing the parts of the people that are the control faction and all of these things. What if they're playing a part that allows us to have the experience where we're having so that we can all wake up in our own ways to collectively shift into a new level of consciousness on the planet? Like, what if they're serving that purpose and without them, it. We wouldn't have as much to learn.

Yeah.

You know, which. Which even brings the. The. The perspective back to even the childhood stuff, because I very well may not be here in front of you today if I didn't go through the controlling stepmom thing from 7 to 15. So it's like, it's an interesting thing because it's like we may sign up to have these kind of experiences to grow and to learn and so that we can become who we came here to be. And there's no telling whether I would be or you would be here based on your child, your past, of everything you went through. Like, it's all kind of. We don't understand it.

Yeah.

But I think it's all part of the macrocosm, microcosm and the same thing. They're play people that are playing the parts of this control faction of all this stuff that's happening. Maybe there's the shadow government, all this. Who knows? Like, I know there's conspiracy theories and all that. I don't really associate myself as much of studying those things like crazy because it doesn't put me in the right state for me to do what I want to do. However, if it is true or if it isn't true, it's interesting because I believe it could be just we kind of reduce resistance when we kind of accept it as playing a part versus, like, they're doing this to me and I'm angry and we need to get together.

And, yeah, I've definitely fallen into that. Yeah, I think that's part of. I think that's part of the human experience too, is like, yeah, we fall in the ditch. I don't know if you've ever seen that little clip of the lamb, like, falling in the ditch, and the farmer gets him out and then he goes.

Right back in the ditch again. I'm like, do you remember, you see that on Instagram? Or was it the lamb that they get out and then it just goes and gets right back into it.

Yeah. I'm like, we do that as human beings. We. And I wonder why we do that. Because, man, you know, something that came to me when I Was. It was my very last ayahuasca ceremony. Was my 12th ayahuasca ceremony. Thank you, Ayahuasca. My time is complete with you. But on this ceremony, I was shown something where if I'm on the bleeding edge of life, if I'm actually living and I'm really alive, I don't even question why I'm living.

Yeah.

And I think that the fact that we are. We're so afraid of death, we're so afraid of our own mortality as human beings that we question, what's the meaning of it all and why am I here? And it's like that's actually the wrong line of thinking. I think a better line of thinking and a better line of questioning is how do I maximize my experience? Or the beautiful way that you said it, how do I be in the frequency of doing what I love? And how does that be of value to other people? Yeah. I mean, that right there, that is a lifetime of discovery and questions. Just that one statement you just said. And in my opinion, that is a much more powerful question of why are we here? What's the meaning of life? What's the purpose? Those are actually mysterious questions that I don't think the creator ever wanted us to answer. Because if we knew the answer, then maybe what I was shown in ayahuasca, if we knew why we were here, maybe we wouldn't live it to the fullest anyways.

Right.

We actually knew.

Yeah. Yeah.

What do you make of that?

I think that our highest excitement, the frequency of what we're excited about, of our passion, a lot of times that can maybe be also relevant to, like, adding value to other people. But when we're in that frequency, if we just follow that frequency, it's the path to what we could call our highest vibration or our highest timeline or whatever we want to call that. But following that passion, following that energy is really the key to just about everything. Like, I'm looking at my life now and what I'm doing and having businesses and all of these things, and it's like, if I can just get to where I put more of my energy, more of the time in my zone of genius, of what I love, that amplifies my life in so many ways. Like, when I'm in a high frequency, I meet different people.

Yes.

Different people. Text me. When I'm in a high frequency, I. I find myself naturally running into people. I run into different people synchronistically. When I'm. When I'm doing more of what I love, when I'm in a different place where I'm doing what I think I need to do or I'm stressed out. You'll sometimes attract similar people or find yourself someone texting. It's really weird how it works, but when I take it all down to me, like, like in. In my own life and what I've noticed for a lot of people, because people always ask me, how do I elevate my vibration, how do I raise my vibration? It's really about following your passion, following your highest excitement, being in the frequency of that energy more often. And when you're following that, whatever it is in the moment doesn't have to be one overarching thing. Like, I'm Aaron dottie. I make YouTube videos. I need to make videos 100, you know, 100 hours a week. It's more so about following what's most excitement in the moment. Sometimes it's sometimes to go meditate, to walk barefoot on grass, to go for a walk, to go talk to someone, go hang out with someone, go dinner.

Eating a turkey sandwich naked.

Could be, could be, could be. That could be the most exciting thing.

Hopefully in the sun, right?

Yeah. Butthole signing, you know, that would be cool.

Well, the reason I'm. The reason I asked you about that is because you've done so much content from what I've seen. I haven't got to view it yet. Yeah, I will definitely look forward to checking it out. On manifesting. And I remember when I originally watched the Secret, I think it was like 2007 or 22.

Yep.

And it was like, you know, be, do and have. And then I went to the MIT training in 2014 and it was like be, do and have. And I keep hearing this be, do, have over and over and over again. And then finally at some point it clicked, Aaron. And I was like, okay, it's actually backwards. I actually need to be. I get to be the very thing that I want. Because I've heard you say this a lot. And I've also heard a couple other friends say this. And it's like you don't get what you are.

Yeah.

You get how you're being.

Yes.

You actually get back mirrored to you energetically and also financially.

Yep.

And relationally and intimacy wise, like all of that stuff gets mirrored back to us because of how we're showing up in the world. Like how we're truly being.

Yeah.

Instead of just what we want or what we desire. Can you like unpack that a little bit slower than you normally would? Because for sure, if this, if people could get this one concept.

Yes.

Then it could truly revolutionize their entire year, hands down. Just this one thing about be do have.

Yeah. So for be do have, we get in life a direct reflection of who we are being. And in 2017, when I was explaining earlier I was being a 9 to 5 job goer, I made the shift where I decided from this point, moving forward, I'm going to be a full time youtuber. Not once I get a hundred thousand subs, then I'm going to be a YouTuber. Not once I have this number of comments or this number of videos out there, then I'll be a YouTuber. It was literally the moment you start it, the moment you are it. That was the mantra that I live by. And that's the mantra I still live by. The moment you start it, the moment you are it. Sometimes people are like, you know, they want to be an artist. So it's like it's not that you will be an artist or. No, it's not that you will. You must have the art studio, you must create art for and do it for like three years, then you can be an artist. You take on the identity of it now by making the choice. And once you make the choice to be it and you're being it, not because it's going to get you somewhere else. I wasn't being a YouTuber because it was going to help escape me from my job. Even though that was something I wanted to do, I was being a full time YouTuber because that's who I choose to be. It's an end of itself. And a big part of this transformation, a big part of this journey is about making the choice to live according to ideals and values that you choose to live by. So in 2020, for anybody that's listening to this right now, focus on the values of how you choose to be of this highest vibrational version of you. What do they value now? I look at and I was able to look at the 9 to 5 job going version of me to the YouTuber version of me. The 9 to 5 job going version of me didn't like it, but was used to and familiar. Having a manager tell me when to come to work and what to do. I didn't like it. I would resist it, but it was familiar. That was that version of me. The YouTuber version of me had to be self motivated. The YouTuber version of Me had it. No one was going to tell me, aaron, you got to make a video today. It was a commitment I made to myself and my own level of integrity that I'm going to make a video every single day no matter what. What happened is through those daily videos of making those, it began to change my sense of identity. I started to see myself differently. I'm like, oh, I'm actually a hard worker and I'm someone that could put my mind something and then do it. And through that commitment to myself, I literally became it very quickly because I made the choice to be it. And the thing that holds people back from being it is they have a story about who they are. They have a story. I'm a 9 to 5 job goer. My dad was a 9 to 5 job goer. This is who I am. And what's funny is in this moment right now, you are who you choose to be. Right now. Every moment's a new moment. Every moment. The cells in our body are dying and being reborn every so many years. Not one cell in our body that was in our body years ago is in our body today. We're constantly dying and being reborn. The thing that keeps us stuck in an old reality is the story that we tell ourselves about who we are and what we are is rigid in that story. So when it comes to letting go and shifting our vibration of who we're being, we have to become aware of the story and the self image about who we are and how we see ourselves. Because I saw myself as a 9 to 5 job goer. That was my life for a long time. And then I made a switch. I saw myself as a YouTuber. Another thing that I'll mention is it was actually in a meditation living at my dad's house. I was meditating, walking to the bathroom of all places. And I had this download this idea, whatever we want to call this insight. If you make a video a day for a year, your life will completely transform. I don't know where it came from. Could be grace, could be from my.

I didn't hear from a coach or anything at that time.

No coach. Make Gary Vaynerchuk.

Because that's what they say now is what they say. What they say if you make a video every day now, your life will transform.

Which is probably. It's.

I've heard many.

Somewhat true, somewhat true. But it's. For me, it was like it was like a higher self thing or like some spiritual component to it. And then I look back because I didn't know marketing at the time either. I didn't know how to make thumbnails. Like, I learned all that stuff as I committed to the daily Videos, but that video a day for a year, I committed to that. And that commitment changed my sense of identity within three months, within a month or two. And then within six months, put in my nine to my, my, my nine to five job, two week notice. And then from there, my whole entire life completely continued transforming. But it comes from the commitment and a willingness to let go of the old story of how you see yourself. Like a book, like Psycho Cybernetics, for example.

It's the OG OG One of the best.

That was when I first read that in 2012. I was working that 9 to 5 job and I realized I saw myself as like a average sales employee. And I realized once again, I was thinking feeling equal to an average sales employee. I'd go into work every day and the top salespeople, all the salespeople's numbers were on the board. I was always in the middle. I'm like, why am I always in the middle? What is my self image? I must be an average sales employee. I'm not the worst, but I'm not the best. So then I thought, how does that version of me think, feel and act? That's a top salesperson. And I realized that version of me greets every customer, doesn't selectively profile customers like a lot of the people I worked with did. That version of me greets every customer. That version of me connects with people emotionally. That version of me has really strong eye contact. That version of me goes above and beyond. Doesn't just bring out one shoe, brings out two or three other shoes and has the courage to show it. That version of me is, is focused on adding value more than anything else. This little thing I would do. It's gonna sound stupid to even share this, but I would put tissue in the bag, over the shoe in a special way and I would then give the bag to the customer. That wasn't just for them, that was also for me. Doing that tissue was assigned to myself. That I go above and beyond. It was a part of my identity. Within days of this mentality of shifting into this energy, this vibration, I was all of a sudden at the top of that list because I changed my self image. I was being that version of me. But I want to share that because that's like a 9 to 5 job going version of me. In 2017, when I started going on YouTube, that I did the same thing in a different way. I thought, if I could do this with being a mediocre sales employee to being a more top salesperson, why can't I do that for working a 9 to 5 sales job to being a YouTuber and doing what I love. And that's. I applied that same principle. But in the moment you have to be the one to decide it and you have to let go of the old identity of being average, not average. Like you're comparing yourself to everyone. But like in my viewpoint of myself, like I realized this is how I view this, my subconscious self image, my self confidence story is that I'm a 9 to 5 job goer now. It's, now it's going from being a YouTuber to being a live in person speaker. You know, so it's, it's always evolving. It's just you have to be, you have to give yourself decision the choice to make it. And that for me has always been the shift is letting go of the old story. By looking around, you can see what it is too. Like, what is my story? Well, if you have a 9 to 5 job and you don't like it, it's probably that you have to have a 9 to 5 job and that's what you believe you need to be in.

Well, and also that 9 to 5 job can be a perfect catapult for doing anything that anybody wants as long as. And this is what I heard from you, as long as they do it at a level of excellence. Like with the tissue paper.

Yes.

He talked about.

Yeah.

And I just had shout out to market on our team. I love her. She does an amazing job. She's watching this video with us right now and I was telling her about this level of excellence that I want to instill through the entire company of like, okay, no matter what we do, even if it's an email or an underline or something in bold or a piece of content that we put out with like the brand colors and the time stops and the transitions, like, everything gets to be at excellence. Not because I'm a perfectionist.

Right.

But because I know that like every single time that I follow through on a promise to myself to be at the highest level of excellence I can be, whether it's like cleaning the studio or preparing for you or putting out the best content we, we possibly can, like, all of that has a vibration to it. All of that comes back to me in some way.

Yeah.

So if I build upon that over time. Oh my God, if you would have told me we'd be at the level we're at today. We, like I was saying when we started this podcast, like, pinch me, dude. I'm so, so grateful. It gives me a Cry. Feel like I almost want to cry right now. Just like, I'm so grateful. I remember in 2015, like you, I was in a really shitty place. I was renting a room from a buddy in San Diego. I had just put my mom in a mental home. I had just broken up with a woman I thought I was going to be with my whole life. And that's where I started the podcast from that place. So it definitely was not sexy and fun. I was in the most crazy dire straits of my life. And the podcast was born from something where I was in so much pain that I would not allow myself to identify with that anymore.

Yeah.

I. I was like, okay, God, if this is what you want for my life, I don't want to be here anymore.

Right.

Like, I don't actually want to do this. Like, this isn't who I am. I know I'm destined for something else. And so I actually think that's the most beautiful place. Whether we're at that place or whether we're at a 9 to 5 that we hate or whether we're having our autonomy challenged or whether we're being disrespected by a manager filming us on our phone. Like, all these things happen for a genuine reason, because they're almost fodder or they're like the arrow being pulled back, the tension on the bow. Eventually, we're going to have to make a decision. Hopefully. My ultimate prayer, man. My ultimate prayer is that everybody here makes a decision to let go of the arrow. Because it's been building you up for so long.

Yeah.

Oh, my God. It's. For some of us here, it's been building for 20 years or more.

Right.

But you don't have to wait that long. Like, you know, six months to a year is enough. You know, at that point that you're under the boa's, under tension, you can let go now.

Yeah.

And when you let go, something so fucking powerful is possible. But it's just. I think what holds us back is the fear of what might happen when we actually, like, let go.

Yeah.

What's going to happen? Am I going to lose my job? Am I going to be able to support my family?

Like, yeah.

Where do we go from there? The fear of letting go. Yeah, Big one.

It is. It is. And it's in a big part of this that I even recognize in your story was, like, you were at a place where you almost said to God or the divine, like, I want. You almost surrendered to it. Right. You let go.

It was actually the Only time in my life, it was the first time, there's been many times since then that I've surrendered, but that was the first time I actually started to know God, truly know God, at like 34 years old to actually have a relationship with God. Because I just said, I can't do this anymore, I have to give this to you.

So it came as a result of letting go.

Absolutely.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I think the larger thing here at play is the trust in the divine, the trust into something larger than ourselves. It's like if I were to try to plan out, you know, when I started on my channel three, three weeks from then's YouTube video, I wouldn't have been able to do it. Because all I trust is that every day I show up, the information will come. Every day I show up, every time I take a step, it's like that platform appears. It's like that scene in Indiana Jones where he like walks over the. There's like things, the dirt, there's. Or he, he walks onto something that. And he has to take the leap of faith.

The leap of faith.

Leap of faith.

The Last Crusade. That's the best one.

I don't know, I haven't seen, I've seen the clip of it cuz I was talking about it and I, I was like, that's so good because you have to trust that you're, you're stepping into the unknown. But this platform appears and I think with the divine there's, it, it's something that as you have the courage to take the steps in that direction on your path, it reveals itself as you go. If you try to figure it all out before you do anything that'll keep you stuck forever. The thing that I noticed also, and you know I've done these 21 day challenges where I've had 30,000 people go through live events. The thing that changes people's lives more than anything else is what we're talking about in this episode of Stop Waiting. Just start. What are you waiting for? The more you wait, the more you're in the vibration of waiting too. Like think about it, the vibration of waiting and the vibration of being are two very different vibrations. No doubt because there's no future. The future, by the time the future gets here, it's this moment right now. So it's I'm waiting, I'm waiting, I'm waiting. I'm in the vibration of waiting. I'm in the vibration of waiting. It's just you stay there. The moment that I. The reality shifts is the Moment you start being it, you stop waiting, and you stop telling yourself the story that you should wait, and you start being it. And when you start being it, that's when you can trust the process of the divine. And that's why to pick something that you're also connected to your heart with, because the universe will kind of flow it through to you. But for me, it was a process of really trusting the process, trusting the divine, trusting myself and my ability to learn and to adapt as I go, and also trusting that I wouldn't. You wouldn't be listening to this podcast episode if it weren't time for you to hear that. For. It weren't time for you to actually start. Because I've heard so many excuses from people. Like, people that want to do what I do on YouTube. They're like, okay, this is what I'm gonna do, Aaron. I'm gonna make 10 YouTube videos. I'm gonna edit them, and then I'm gonna release them all at once. And I'm like, no, make one video and post it out. And that. That's. People always want to wait. They're like, they want to wait. They don't want people.

It's got to be perfect.

It's gotta be perfect.

Yeah.

And that once again, many times the need to be perfect is this addiction to an energy of not being good enough.

Yeah.

So if I can be perfect nowadays, if you look to my own YouTube for this as. As, like, feedback on that. Perfection is not even. Like, my YouTube channel is so just sharing vulnerably what I've been through. It's not perfect half the time. Like, the editing is whatever. Like, people want real people want authentic. That's like the era that we're in right now where there's. It's almost like there's so much superficial perfection from Instagram that it's not even relatable.

Yeah.

The more real you are, the more authentic you are, the more you show the vulnerable parts of yourself you're normally afraid to show. That's what gets people to really connect with it. And that's not perfect, and that's why it's relatable. So it's like, it's not perfect. I don't have perfect editing. I'm perfect. This I don't. I've heard all the excuses, and I had the same blocks before I started. But you still have to make the choice to start. And the moment you start is the moment you start creating a new timeline for yourself.

Okay. Let that land for a moment. And also Be cautious of what I'm about to share because I've fallen into the trap of trying to be it until I see it or fake it until I make it.

Yeah.

And I actually get to. I get to call bullshit on that in a loving way. I'm not here to hate on people that are trying to be their best selves, but there is something really, really powerful about language.

Yeah.

I went through two big trainings this year. NLP Shout out to Scott Jackson and Joni in Montana. Because the NLP freedom was amazing, man. I mean, I learned about our critical factor and what really blocks unconscious to conscious integration. How we receive literally 11 million bits per second, but we can only process 126.

I mean, it's that crazy.

It is wild.

Yeah.

How many things are coming at us? And so, you know, it begs this question of, okay, if I'm being authentic like you said, and I'm really going out there as my true self, not this perfect, manicured, kind of contrived self where I'm really trying to be it till I see it. I want to caution everybody and I want to get your advice on this. Like, how do we actually go and do the thing and be honest about where we are so that we're not being unconsciously off putting about being something that we're not? In other words, like, okay, my coach that I paid 10k to, he told me or she told me that I'm going to be it till I see it. So, you know, this is. This is what I'm worth now. I'm going to charge $333 an hour. What seems to be like the number that up and coming coaches charge. Yep, 33.3. We had a. We had a nanny that we hired, and I'm not going to throw her under the bus, but I have to share this story. She's going through her process and I just shared with her. I'm like, you know, there is something to be said about, like, owning your worth, but also admitting where you are. And I said it in the most loving, serving way. And I think when it comes to coaches, too, the thing that I'm wanting your opinion on it and your viewpoint on is the this. We also, as we create with authenticity and power and a new vision of ourselves, we also get to be honest about where we are. And that's actually the magic itself. I'm not faking where I am. I'm. I'm at this many downloads, I'm at this many views. I'm in my dad's Basement. Yeah, I'm in my best friend's room when I start the podcast. Whatever. Just be honest about where you are because I wonder if you could speak to what happens when people get too big for their britches or when they try to be something they're not because they're so focused on the vision of their new identity.

Right.

Which you've spoken about. But there's a loss of integrity and a lot, a loss of authenticity about where they actually are creating from in that specific moment on their timeline.

The way that I approach that kind of energy when it comes to being it and faking it till you make it, and even the, even the language of that alone as well. Right. Like be it until you are it or fake it till you make it. It's like fake, first off, fake. The energy, the vibration of fake word. It's a shitty word. But even be it until you are it. Like you, like, you're not being it to get anything. You're being it because it's who you choose to be. So it's more so about quality of the values you choose to live by than it is the outcome. And I think that's where things really begin to clear up because a lot of people are, okay, I need to be this million dollar coach. That's an outcome that's like a result that they're looking to get instead of, instead of being the coach on their YouTube channel of coaching people and putting out a whole bunch of free content to get the experience to then get to a place to where one day the demand is so high that you could charge whatever it is you want.

Yes.

But I think some of that could also be a form of entitlement where it's like, maybe it's like an overcorrection. It's like, well, I felt not worthy for so long in my life and now I'm going to be worthy. So now $333 for this. I think people are really quick, though, to want to capitalize on the taking or the, the receiving end of it.

Yeah.

When maybe I'm a little old school also because I put out like years of videos before I really monetize it in certain ways. Like, yes, I. I sold Meditations, I think in the beginning for like three bucks. You know, I think I sold like a morning routine course for 37 bucks at one point, you know, but that was after I had like a hundred thousand on YouTube and I already put out like hundreds of hours of content, you know, So I think the energy balance is More so focusing on just adding value to other people. Like if you put your attention on adding value and being the kind of person that adds value and that has this authentic energy of wanting to connect with people and wanting to like elevate their life. You don't have to worry about the $333 an hour. You don't have to worry about all of this stuff. It will come in and you'll get an inspiration when the time is right. Yes, maybe it's people that are like shifting and the. There's so many elements to being this new version of yourself and money is such a small aspect of it, but that when people focus on money, they're focused on an outcome and they're focused on the side effect. The cause of the money is the value. And when you add enough value, people will be wanting to give you their money. People want to be joining a program you're doing. They will want, they will ask you. You won't have to like promote it as much, you know. So it's like having more of a balance of just how you're showing up in the world and choosing to live by values of authenticity vulnerability. Not because it's gonna get you the clients, not it's cause it's who you choose to be. And funny enough, when you're not attached to the outcome, it comes. You're in an abundant state, you're in an abundant energy where you don't have to like pitch as much. Do you know what I mean? It's like kind of really looking at it in that way has changed a lot for me at least. It's just having that intention of adding value of being of service to other people, being authentic, being vulnerable. It's a big part of my channel has grown because of being vulnerable and sharing things that most YouTubers or people wouldn't share, like.

Like what's something that you think they wouldn't share that you've shared?

Like for example in this podcast, I in the beginning was really focused on getting views and wanted that gold play button. Yeah, I really felt like I wasn't good enough. Even on my Instagram story this morning, I talk about for so long it was like I was, I have this work, I've been like a. Not a workhorse, but I work really hard and I've become aware that because in childhood I was controlled when my ex stepmom left my life and I was attracting people that reflected that energy. When I finally cut all that energy out and forgave my ex stepmom, which is kind of what caused the energy go away. I became the control in my life. I became the person that was very hard on myself. I was never, I felt like you're, you know, kind of like talking to myself in a way where it's like, it's not enough, it's not enough. Make more videos, do more, do more, do more. And I've realized that a lot of that work hard mentality I have sometimes a challenge just chilling out, just going and like doing things without having like most of my friends are people that are like, I talk business with stuff like that. And there's a part of myself that sometimes feels like I don't have as much fun as I could. And I, my fear is that in 10 years from now I'm going to be on the perceived mountaintop of whatever my ego desires. But then I'm going to feel like I didn't enjoy it as much along the way. So even just sharing that, for example, there's a vulnerable human aspect of it where people could listen to that and some people wouldn't share that. They're like, well, I'm just going to go after what I'm going to go for or they'll show the best parts of themselves on social media or Instagram. And it's like I'm aware and I'm not doing it to get a different result. I'm just, this is just what's real and I just know that this is what's authentic for me in the moment.

You know, man, I was five years, four or five years ago, I was. You brought this story out of me. This is why I love podcasting because I haven't thought about this in like five years. Tom Bilyeu, he sold, he sold Quest Nutrition and he was at his house, it was for this Modius device that was going to help people lose weight. I don't know what happened to the device, whatever. I went there for like a little gathering and, and actually we did a podcast like maybe a couple weeks later and he said, yeah, when I got the check from Quest, I think it was like a ten figure check, some enormous amount of money. And he said, I saw it in my bank account and I felt the same as I did five minutes before. Yeah, I didn't actually feel any more excited because I already knew it was going to be there and it didn't make my life this like different thing because right. He had become the type of person that already knew it was there. I've heard Lewis Howes say this as well. Like he already knew that he was going to be a best selling author. So when he grabbed the book at the bookstore, it wasn't like a thing for him. He didn't get joy and excitement. How do we build our life as creators? Whether it's a $50,000 a year creator or a $50 million a year as creators. And I'm asking you this because you shared vulnerably right where you're at in your own consciousness development. How do you see this playing out for you, for all of us, where we're not just chasing the stick, where we work hard, we're of value, we're in the frequency and vibration of being of service, doing something that we love. And we're designing a life to where we can climb as many mountains as possible. And every time we get to the top of one, it is exciting and we look forward to the next mountain. Is that too pie in the sky or what? What do you think about that?

I think that the, the key is in the present moment, right now, choosing the lifestyle and living it now. Because it's not like once you get some external result, you're then going to be able to feel it more. So for me, when I talk about, I'm aware that, you know, if I were to have 5 million followers on YouTube instead of whatever I have, like that would feel way more worthy. It's like I'm gonna live the same way I would live then now. So it's more so about figuring out once you buy your time back. I'd say obviously if you're working a 9 to 5 job you hate, the first goal would be to like do what you love and to have intend for that reality to tend to become that version of yourself. But once you have that, it's then how can I do only what I love in the way in which I love doing it? So for example, for me making videos the way I've always made them, some of it's felt stagnant and it's not doing as well as it used to because I don't, I'm not as passionate about as I used to be. Now what I did recently is I did those live events, those live events that I did, I recorded the live events and took clips of it and put it on my Instagram, put it on different like IG reels and stuff like that. Within one week, like a couple weeks ago, like a month and a half ago probably I was like, I'm gonna put a video out every single day on Instagram for like A couple weeks, right. I did that third or fourth video in. I had a clip from that live event that I did get four, three. No, I think it's got four point something million views. And it grew my Instagram account by a hundred thousand followers from committing to just putting out content that I was passionate about, but when I was in a certain frequency. So the reason I share that, because I'm not. I'm gonna say, oh, look at me, I gotta, you know, I grew by this much or whatever.

It is pretty cool too.

But it's the. The thing that's cool about it, in my opinion is when I'm in the state of being on stage, I'm in a different energy and I have a different passion that then is also reflective as a content creator on. In my audience because they. They tune to it differently because I'm in a different state. One thing I've always lived by is people feel what you feel. So now the question is, okay. And even when doing this podcast right now with you, there's a lot more energy that gets. That gets like sparked up. For me when you. I have someone like you that I'm connecting with and we have this information being pulled out of me, it's much more. It's much different than if I'm just sitting in front of my camera trying to come up with a video. So now what I'm paying attention to as a creator is when am I in these states more often? Because these states are when I feel elevated. People watching it will feel more elevated if I'm making a video I feel like I have to make because this is who I am and it's what I've always done. They're going to feel that I'm just having to make the video.

Yes.

So as a creator, I think the important thing to remember is as you grow and as you get more of your information out there, you're having more impact. There can be this thing that you've created that you then put pressure on yourself to continue to create in the same way because it's always worked.

Or you could just choose to let it die, which is what I did in 2022.

Yeah.

I let Wellness Force podcast die and I replace force with wisdom.

Oh, wow.

So we've been wellness and wisdom ever since.

That's a cool evolution.

Yeah.

Force, like.

Like the etymology of like Hawkins work. Right. The frequency when I'm forcing something that's not very trustable.

You moved from below 200 into the 500.

That's it, man. Because I was real. We actually did a mushroom journey, Carrie and I, December 31, 2021. And I'm like, I just feel out of fudgeing. Alignment. I feel out of integrity. I feel out of alignment. I'm kind of exhausted by my podcast. Like, what is the deal here? And she's like, well, what is it? And we got down to it. And I'm like, I just hate the word force.

Yeah.

I don't like it. I've spent so much of my life for to happen. Like, it just doesn't feel good. Yeah. And she turned to me and said, well, why don't you just call it wellness wisdom? And I went down this path of, like, finding there. There was a squatter sitting on the URL that wanted 30k for it. And I was like, nah. And then I sat in further meditations, and I was like, wow. What about combining two subjects that might seem siloed, but they're actually the same thing? So that's where wellness and wisdom came from. Because I don't think we can be well unless we're wise. I don't think we can be wise unless. Unless we're well. I think they feed into each other almost like a snake's tail. A snake eating its own tail. So I wonder, man, we covered a lot of ground here today.

Yeah, we did.

And it's been interesting because I feel like I got a side of you that maybe. Well, I'm sure your subscribers get this side of you all the time.

In some ways, I think there are different stories, some of the stories or some stuff I've shared, but there's different aspects or angles of it that come out in conversation like this, which is cool.

I enjoy it. And this is the first time we're meeting, so I feel like I'm actually getting to know you in a conversation that's just live and recorded.

Yeah.

And one of the things I've really enjoyed is, like, you have a fire and a passion, but you don't seem angry. It doesn't seem like you're coming from this place of, like, I got to do more.

Yeah.

How would you describe that inside of you? Because you have. You have a gravity to you, but you also have a way of articulating with passion and drive.

Yeah.

But when I. When I sense and when I feel you, I don't sense that. Like, you're doing it because you have to get somewhere.

Yeah.

What is that for you?

Yeah, for me. That's interesting. I'd say that inside my body, like, when I'm speaking And I'm sharing the content. There's a certain frequency that kind of like comes through.

What is that frequency?

I don't know. It's like it just, it's, it's hard to explain. It's hard to put like, like words to it necessarily. Because this is, because to me this is just who I am. Not that I'm some highly evolved like guru with no anger or anything like that, because that's not it at all. But I think that when I am in this vibe of like wanting to add value, it's like that kind of the energy just kind of flows through and it feels much more clean and clear, you know? Yeah. I think subconsciously my, there is, it's like this two, two sided thing because on one hand I don't feel like I'm desperately trying to get somewhere. I'm not. Like it doesn't feel like that. But at the same time I know I'm always trying to be aware of my ego and I know that my ego probably gets something out of the content and everything. It's like, why else? Like there's an egoic desire there for sure. So it's like I'm always trying not to like kid myself. Do you know what I mean?

Yeah.

But yeah, in general for me it's like just remembering why I do it, what my intention is. And I think a lot of it too is just. It is, it is partially. I mean there's always shit coming up. For me. Like part of the things I share on my channel is I share things as they come up. Like this happened recently and it sucked and blah blah, blah, blah. So in the thing that helps with is like when I, when I meet people it sometimes helps and it sometimes hurts. On one hand it's like I don't want to ever position myself as some guru because that to me feels not only fake but like it's, it's not the positioning or the, I don't know, it doesn't feel authentic for me. Right. On the other side of that though, then when I meet people, they, everyone feel, they feel like they know me because they've watched so many videos and I've heard so many stories for my life.

Yeah.

So it's kind of got this, this dual sided thing where it's like I'm kind of like right in the middle of just kind. I kind of want to be like a tour guide, you know what I mean? Like somebody that's like going up the mountain and you just want, I'm like one step ahead and we're, like, doing it together. You know what I mean?

Tour guide's always fun, too. He's on the microphone sharing all the fun things about the zoo. Or, you know, he loves his job, he's into it.

Versus, like, the. The guru mountain. The guy on top of the mountain is just meditating.

White cape. You come to me for answers. There's a looking down effect.

Like, wind in his hair.

Never feels good. It just doesn't.

Yeah, it doesn't. And it's. I don't know. I feel like it. It creates a shell. It creates. Probably creates like a block or something like that. And also people then worship and praise that they don't believe it's inside of themselves. And that's the biggest problem. The biggest problem is that people don't know that they have the same power inside themselves. So they begin looking to someone else. They think that person's special. And one thing, I try to always keep my ego in check. It's one reason that I think I drink plant medicine a couple times a year, because it's.

It.

It helps me to just really remain as humble as I can be when I am, like, interacting with people and then also with the way I see myself, because I think people get into trouble when they're in a position like I'm in with, like, a YouTube channel and. And people that, like, look up to what I do.

You could surround yourself with yes men. Nobody would ever challenge you.

Right? Exactly.

A lot of. A lot of people like that in Austin now.

Yep, Yep. It's a common, common thing. And I can see why.

I mean, surround themselves. They build an entire community around themselves.

Yep.

Business, personal, even plant medicine community, where it's. Everyone's just always agreeing with the person. No one ever challenges the person. I do not want a life like that.

Yeah, I agree. I agree. I think the un. So the way that I view divinity, God, the universe is that it's almost like the more. The more you allow that energy to flow through without identifying with it, the more it will be at service to you. The moment I believe that I. If I were to start, like, I get something because when I meet subscribers in public, it's cool, but, like, I know people or I've seen people before, that when that happens, it's like they get fueled up because they. They feel cool. You know what I mean? Whereas me, it's like something I'm getting more and more comfortable with as it happens and stuff like that. But the way that I view this kind of work is if There was an ego that, like, got something really out of it and really enjoyed it and needed it around and needed all the people around me constantly affirming me. It's almost like the. There'd be a kink in the hose and the information would come out distorted. It's like there'd be challenge, like, even more challenges would come in. So it's like I really don't have a choice from my perspective, like, I really have to be in as integrity as impossible if I want to have a smooth ride, enjoy my life. So it's almost like they're. In my viewpoint, the way I view it is I really don't have a choice. And I surround myself with people that will call me, like my friends and stuff. We do. Some of us do very similar things for a living, but we're committed to our own paths in such a way to where we would call each other out or we would, you know, we hold space for each other when we're going through different themes. But that I think is important too, is to have people in your corner that aren't just affirming, but also are people that can help you do it. And also people that are doing their own inner growth, their own inner work. Because if they're not, then it's like that in your inner circle that does kind of leak onto you in different ways.

You know, this is a huge piece to. To also just add as another ancillary tool to all the other tools you've given us. And that is whether you're a woman or a man, like be in a group of same gender, because there's so much learning that can happen there. Women's groups, men's groups. Yeah, you can cohabitate. You can do, you know, mixed gender groups, whatever. I will say though, man, there is something really powerful and special about men's work. For me specifically, I'm a man. Right. And there's. Women's work is powerful too. I couldn't find it in Austin, so two years ago, I just created it. And now we have nine, including myself, of the most amazing men who call each other out, who actually help each other see the parts of ourselves that maybe we can't see.

Yeah.

And it sometimes is very confronting, but we always come together and it is the most special thing to be able keep us on path. And like, half the group, actually, almost. Almost all the group is entrepreneurs. And so we all figure out, hey, are we being our most authentic self or are we bullshitting ourselves?

Right.

And it could be about women. It could be about business. It could just be about a story we're telling ourself that isn't true. I can't tell you how many times I've like cried or laughed at myself in a men's group because I realized what I just said was total fucking bullshit. But at least I had the courage to say it.

Yeah.

I can't let you go before asking this one thing. It was what I was interrupting you on and actually two things. And then we'll let you go.

Yeah, for sure.

The first thing is plant medicine is neither good nor bad.

Yeah.

It's simply just a tool. So if I have a hammer, I could, I could build a home or I could kill someone.

Yes.

What is something that plant medicine has taught you that was really challenging in the lesson, but then once you were able to move through the lesson, it was one of the most valuable things in your life. Like, what is some of the wisdom that a plant teacher or a plant ally has given you where in the moment you were like, oh my God, I don't know if I could deal with this. But then afterwards you knew it was probably one of the best things that ever happened for you.

Yeah, there's. There's definitely a few things. So the, the first one that's the superficial one is just the, the letting go. Letting go. Always letting go is like the most powerful lesson I learned almost on every single journey that I've had on plant medicine.

If you hang on, you're fucked.

So you don't really have a choice.

You don't hang on.

The degree to which you hang on is the, the degree to which it's like a hard journey, a hard experience.

Yeah.

One of the ones for me that has been a very interesting experience is when I do these medicine, these ceremonies, I do them and we. I have plant medicine people that have been doing it for 20, 30 years that come in and me and two of my friends that are also YouTuber, like content creators, we basically hold a safe space and have 30 something people that come. That seems to be about the right number. We've done it nine times now over the last four years. We do two, three times a year and it's two or three nights of Aya. So that's the specific plant medicine. Because of what I do and like the position that I have of being of people coming from my YouTube channel. I do drink sometimes. I kind of go light because I, you know, just the dynamic, you know. However I drink in the. When I drink, I'm in the space with Everybody. I've had a couple instances, and I won't go into too much details on this, but just of experiences where people are projecting energy at me because of what they think they know about me or of that's, you know, maybe the thread that got them in, you know, and people are vetted to come in. They can't be on medications or like this whole process. Right. But basically I've had once or twice things happen to where someone comes over and does something that is very. Either some, you know, I'm laying on my bed and something happens where someone's trying to attack me, or they're having like an ego death and they're blaming me, or it's something else where they get on top of me. And I've had some weird things happen on plant medicine in that kind of dynamic when those things have happened. There was a common thing where I would think there was something wrong with me, something I'm doing wrong. Why am I attracting people that like, almost feel like there's not this boundary with me to where they can come over and like demand my energy. And I'm not even. I'm not a plant medicine teacher or anything. I'm receiving the medicine just like them, you know. But when stuff like that would happen, there was this feeling of guilt, this feeling of I'm doing something wrong or there's something about this energy that like. Like I need. I need to shift. And one of the things that I realized after actually this happened more recently is one of the shaman came over to me after this altercation thing happened, whereas at five in the morning and something happened and it was like very shocking and everything turned out okay. But it was like a very interesting experience, I could say. And one of the shaman came over to me and is this magical guy that's been doing it for a long time. And basically we're kind of talking about that situation. And what he said was, is he said this energy of why this happened had nothing to do with you. He said it came from your mom's lineage of the family, your mom's side of the family. And when he said that, like, goosebumps came through my body because I. He didn't know much of my past or anything, but that's true. My mom has had crazy childhood and stuff like that. My real mom, not ex stepmom, but she has had crazy things happen to where it's like a residual energy from there, that piece of advice right there, and me focusing on getting present inside of my own body and feeling safe in my own body, even if there's other things happening, has been a huge transformation over the last, like, six months or so. Me feeling safe in my own body, even me feeling safe when I. When I'm meeting people in public that recognize me for my videos. And most of my audience is women, so it sounds silly because it's like 80, 70 of my audience is women. But I've had things happen where people come up and they. They want to, you know, they want me to kind of like a lot of 90 of the time, I'll say too. It's really cool. It's. It's fine. But there's someone every now and then that'll come and they really want my attention, or they. They're kind of overbearing, or they sent. They see them at a hotel and they send things to the front desk and it gets kind of creepy at times with, like, long written letters and stuff like that, you know? Yeah. And there's times I feel unsafe and I've had to move houses before because of things like this. So I'm like, what is it in my energy? Because there's other content creators that have big followings. They don't have to. They don't deal with people seeking them out, finding their addresses and stuff like that, you know. But for me, what I've realized is it's my safety within my own body. It's my safety within my own frame. And honestly, clearing out and healing and releasing a lot of that energy that may have come from my mom's side of the lineage of the family. And as I've done that more and more, I've felt more and more safe in my own energy, where even when things do happen, I'm able to, like, kind of respond to it and not react so much, not think, like, why me? Why do I, in this lifestyle or whatever, you know what I mean? Because it's kind of like sometimes I reject the energy of where people know who I am or when I go into public and stuff like that. So I know that's a long answer, but, like, this has been a process of like, six to eight months of me feeling safe within my own body, feeling safe within my own frame of reality, and also, like, not reacting and also understanding when it's someone else's stuff and not mine. You know, if, like, I meet someone that's just convinced that I'm their twin flame, soulmate or something like that, which sometimes happens, like, literally, there are people that really believe that, and they'll go to extreme lengths to like, let. To like get through to me on this, you know, so there's times I have to like create boundaries. I have to not feel guilty. I have to. There's a lot of elements to it. Then I feel guilt. I feel like if I do that, they like my content though. So if I do cut them off, what do they like, do something to themselves? Like it's this weird thing, you know. But for me it's been a process of individuation, which is a whole other concept, but individuation of feeling safe inside my own body and letting that be like a barometer. Not needing to seek it in outside sources, not needing to like, you know, move into, you know, like have to do something specific in order to feel that way. To feel safe in the here and now, in my body, release the energy from the past. That's been a huge epiphany for me.

30 people is a lot, man. That's a lot of energy flying around.

It is. Yeah, yeah, it's 30. It's 30. It's about 30 people. And then there's part of the team and stuff like that. But feels it's. Any more than that would definitely be too much, though.

You bring up such a great point. And it's really about knowingness and discernment. So there's a knowingness that you described that no matter how far out in the 5D or 27D you get that you can always come back here to the 3D and integrate the lessons. Knowing that you're safe in your body to do so.

Yeah.

And that's a really huge piece that I think so many people, unfortunately have been turned on to plant medicine. They go down to Costa Rica and they drink a bunch of medicine with 120 people in a room. And next thing you know, they have soul loss. They get psychic shattering.

Yes.

Into myself.

Yeah.

And it happened to a lot of people.

Yeah.

And it happened for a good reason. Because for me it was healing that needed to occur. And so I'm grateful for it. But, you know, knock on wood, it happened for me and I got out. So many people go deep into the plant medicine world.

Yeah.

And if they're not held with loving intention and pure heart, they can be really damaged.

Yeah.

So I do want to say that, like, plant medicine is not for everyone.

No, it's not.

It's not for everyone.

Absolutely not.

I'm not here to say you should do it or you shouldn't do it. That's your own journey. So follow your intuition on that journey.

Yeah.

And very last question, man, that I get to ask you before you go is this. So I've always said this, and I say always because I can't remember. It's probably been a hundred times or more that I've said this. People will message me and they'd be like, how do I start a podcast? How do I do this thing? And I always tell them, like, well, okay, are you willing to become someone different? Because whether you stay where you are or whether you move into the person you want to be, you desire to be, there's going to be pain either way, right? There's going to be pain of you having a new version. There's definitely going to be pain sitting where you are. So I always tell them, at least move towards the thing that you desire. At least move towards that direction because you're going to become this person who's able to see all their shit come up along the way as to why their unconscious is trying to tell them not to do it because it wants to be safe. How do you describe these two things that @ first glance might seem like a dichotomy, but it's actually the same thing. I don't think it's possible to move forward in life without some type of pain in personal growth. I think it's actually hand in hand. Doesn't mean that pain has to be there all the.

Time.

Right? But definitely it's there. And I think that's the reason why so many people that have been watching or listening to this whole episode may sadly put this podcast down and never do anything. Or excitably, they might listen to you and us and they might feel like, wow, I'm actually going to do that one thing every day now, right? And I'm going to light my life on fire. How do you describe those two things? How can we just marry the understanding that each path has pain? And so it's not that we should fear pain. What. What actually is the greatest thing that we should be aware of in.

This perceived dichotomy of which you, I mean, choose, the pain is going to motivate you either way. Like, one, one will motivate you to stay where you are. Because the pain of not having that 9 to 5 job or what it'll take to get into your passion will motivate you to stay where you are. So it's as if. As if one form of the pain is more long tail to where it's like you can kind of hold back and like, hold in there for a while. And then eventually experience the benefit. And the other one is the reverse where on the other side of it, it's like you'll feel not even pleasure right away, but you'll feel safe and comfortable. But in the future, like 10 years down the road, that's when the regret, that's when the pain will happen. The way I always do, the way I live my life honestly in general is I always get the hard stuff done first. So like when I do my every day, I wake up, I do my YouTube video. It's not hard necessarily, but I get my work done in the morning. And then as my day goes on, I enjoy life more and more. By the time it's towards the end of the day, I'm really winded down. I'm having fun, fun. I'm kind of like enjoying and eating and all that stuff, you know what I mean? But in the morning it's more focused, intermittent fasting, getting things done. And then I go to the.

Gym. Cold.

Plunge. Cold plunge right when I wake up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Doing uncomfortable things. And the funny thing is is your relationship to uncomfortable also changes. The pain is only in the beginning that you're getting used to something. Like I went to the cold plunge this morning and I've just been getting back into cold plunge again because I'm back in town now and I was away from having access to it the first couple days. It's much more challenging to where now it's like you can be in for longer and longer, but then you get a dopamine spike where you can focus on work or whatever you want to focus on for hours afterwards. So it's like this thing that you do where there's short term pain and pressure with long with long tail or you know, like residual benefits. So the message is that one is a form of not even pain, but like the pain comes later on if you stay where you are. The pain comes with also living up to, to a life that doesn't feel authentic. Living when you know there's something else you could be doing or something that could be in more alignment and knowing as well that when you do what you love, you meet other people that do what they love. Like when I had a 9 to 5 job, I always was in relationship with women that also had nine to five jobs they hated. So all the girlfriends I had work jobs they hated because I hated my job. When I started doing what I love, I then would only date and being have girl, like be in relationship with someone that does what they love. So it's funny how that's a one on reflection. So it could be not only if you're listening to this and you're not in your ideal relationship, that could also come with you making the choice to go after your purpose, after your passion. Because when you're in the most authentic version of you, you're going to attract people into your life that are the most authentic versions of them. But you're also given a gravity to track that in, because you're putting out the frequency, you're putting out the energy. Whereas if you wait and you're working a 9 to 5 job you hate or you're not that passionate about, you're gonna stay in that energy. And then 10 years from now, 15 years from now, or whatever it is, you're gonna look back and you're gonna realize that you could have made the choice, but you chose not to. But the cool thing is too, is when I started making videos on YouTube, after about two or three weeks, it got easier and easier because it became natural for my identity. So what you think of as pain isn't even really pain. It's just unfamiliar for a little bit, and then by the time it becomes familiar, it's not painful. Like back in the day, to make an Instagram video and to put it out of me sharing something vulnerable, that could have been like, a lot of pain. Cause, like, what do people think? All of this stuff now, it's not painful at all. I'm used to it. It's normal. It's natural. So realize that the pain begins to transform. And the tension, it's not even pain as much as it is tension. It's tension. But tension is what creates growth. Tension is what allows you to grow. You go to the gym, you give your muscles tension, they can get bigger. So in the same way, it's like you go through the tension and the keys to lean in the tension instead of staying over here. Not in the tension, where it's safe and comfortable and lukewarm. But if you stay there, you're just gonna. You're gonna stay where you are and you're saying, affirming a reality that doesn't resonate anymore. So if you're filling the call and you're listening to this episode, still, it's even more of an alignment with lean into tension. Tension is a good thing. Tension allows you to grow. And tension is something you begin to load more and more. You get used to it, and it becomes your natural comfort zone. It becomes natural and.

Easy. To me, it feels like a Cave that. You know, we've heard this before from Joseph Campbell. The cave that you fear to enter holds the treasure you.

Seek.

Yeah. Well, you get to look at that every day. Like, every day. Cold plunge, recording a video, doing the one thing that scares you. Whatever it is. There's probably five or six things every day where I'm just like. But I do them anyways, right? And I always feel better after I do it because I get to the cave every.

Day.

Yeah. Every single day. I'm going into that cave and I'm getting a little piece of gold every day. And so when I'm in the shitty point, whether it's doing, like, finances or cold plunge or sauna or whatever, when I'm there, I remind myself what's.

Coming.

Yeah. I remind myself what's coming when I'm done with the thing that's making me feel.

Uncomfortable.

Right. And that, to me, is the ultimate win. If we can train our mind and our whole being, man, if we can train our whole being to be, like, focused on what's coming after. After. I feel the pain of where I'm at, that could change the entire world. And that's my intention with this podcast, with this conversation, is that people have heard from you and felt from you that they actually can do this. This is not something that's pie in the sky. This is reality that you have actually chosen and manifested in form through commitment, through rewiring your own mindset. You are no special. More than anybody listening. You might have a certain cadence to how you speak. You might have cool hair. You might have women that like you, whatever. But we all have our own unique gifts. And so if we can just all move towards that cave every single day and get to that. Delayed gratification. Holy shit.

Aaron. Delayed gratification. That was the. That was the word. No, that was the. I guess that's the.

Opposite. Long tail. Delayed gratification. So that's. That's really it, man. I've so enjoyed this. I'm glad that we got to.

Sit. Me too.

Man. At the Perota table from. From Costa Rica, by the.

Way. That's.

Awesome. And as parting guidance as we say goodbye, by the way, thank you. Your team gave us a meditation that you. You created for us, so it's also on the screen now. Joshtran.com Aaron Cool. So that's the inner child.

Meditation. Inner child.

Meditation. That's actually a beautiful place for all of us to start because everything as we know and as 600 episodes, I've done probably 400 of them have been about inner child.

Work. Yeah. Oh, the perfect.

Alignment. So come on, yo. But anyways, as we say goodbye, how would you define wellness? You know, this is a question I've been wanting to answer since I was a little boy, man. Since. Since I was a little kid. I was like, what is going on with this world? Why are things so wonky? Why are adults so mean to each other? What the hell is going on? And it led me to here right now with you in this moment where I've asked this question. This is the 600th time I've asked this.

Question. Oh, wow.

Yeah. How would you define wellness? How do you feel your life is lived well? How would you articulate a life well lived? What does wellness mean to.

You? To me, wellness means alignment. It means alignment. Alignment with the passion, frequency, the energy of what my soul came here to do. I think of wellness a lot. I think a lot of my life, of what I focus on, is very spiritual. So there is a physical. I mean, the physical body obviously is a reflection of that wellness as well. But living in alignment with my, I guess you could say, highest vibrational self. And everyone living in alignment with their highest vibrational self is about really, like, what lights you up, what gives you energy to do, what adds value to other people. Wellness is a balance of that awareness of what that is for you, and then living according to that credo. Living according to that, that inner knowing and choosing it for yourself. I think wellness is something that you can choose for yourself as you break out of the unconsciousness of. However, maybe you grew up or whatever patterns you adopted. So wellness for me really is about spiritual alignment to all that I came here to be, but also of how I can add value to other people. Because when you are, well, I think that also is contagious to other.

People.

Yes. Energy is.

Contagious. Yes. We love it when people feel well because they remind us that we can feel well, too. Yeah, right. Energy begets more energy of the same source. So, dude, it's been really amazing. On your YouTube channel, it says down to earth spirituality, and it says that on your website as well. I could not say anything different about you. Like, this is very down to earth. There's a lot of woo and a lot of esoteric concepts and spirituality. So, yeah, making it practical that everybody can use. I hope that y' all share this episode with every single human being. Maybe it's your mom, your dad, your brother, your sister. I don't know, just share this thing. If they've been kind of turned off by the woo woo out there and they want something that's way more practical. So from my heart to yours, and for both of us, until we see you again, we're both wishing you love and wellness. Talk to you soon. Hey, thanks for watching this video. If you love this video, hit subscribe. That way you'll be automatically notified when new videos come out, new episodes, and also share this video with a friend. If you loved it, they're going to love it too. Check out some of the videos on this screen that are perfectly curated based on the video you just saw. Make sure you follow me and I'll see you in the next.