Break Generational Cycles + How Blocked Chakras Make You Sick

But how do we actually identify when a chakra is actually blocked?

So many of us have had the oppression of our emotions. We've learned from different experiences to shut down and bottle those emotions. So this is where liver issues, stomach issues, acidity starts to happen. And if I believe that my voice doesn't matter. If I believe I'm not safe. Just the nervous system connecting to those beliefs start this whole cascade of chemicals in the body, and the organs and the glands start contracting because they're in fight or flight. This is where our intuitive coping mechanisms come in. And we do the best we can. Put up a wall, get small, fake it, sedate, run, hide, blame. Those become our coping mechanisms. And then. And survival strategies, which are fantastic.

They keep us alive.

They keep us alive. They're just not long term strategies. So we take them into adulthood and we don't upgrade them, stewarding another soul. We're just gonna be passing on those behaviors down to the next generation.

We have got to have shared a past life or two. Right. Like when I first met you almost four years ago, I had no idea who you were, but there was, like this connection.

Yeah.

And I felt that with you. Like, we can go a year or more without talking, and then I see you again and it's like we just pick up. Exactly. But there is something about this, like the. The way that people connect to each other and it's an unspoken thing, you know, like Zach Bush might call it, like the enteric nervous system and, you know, know, the little signaling mechanisms that we have. There is something that you. If you had to guess, this is a fun way to start a podcast. If you had to guess, where do you think we connected in a past life? Or what is our soul connection? Or what is the etheric cord that you and I share? If you had to guess, I really.

Think we were brother, sister, and, like, were bound in some way to really help each other out. Like, I feel like it was a blood connection of just. Because I feel brotherhood when I look at you, when I see you, when I feel. I feel safety, I feel a yearning and a desire to support you, to guide you, to receive from you. There's trust, there's respect, and there's just this inherent safety and resonance. And so for me, it feels like sibling because I still feel that today.

Yeah. Oh, my God. Well, the law, the law of one is in full effect. I mean, so what I originally felt from you was mentorship. And then from mentorship, it kind of blossomed, this rose of connection and friendship. And then Now I feel like there's this cool balance of, like, you're not necessarily on a mountain preaching to people. You're just a little bit further along the path. And I really love that. And I think that's the part of you that I most connect with. And this is the first time I've talked about this on the podcast, so this is a good jumping off point. You just opened a center in Sedona. It's called Shine. So we're obviously going to talk about that. Like, the ways that we can shine in life, but truly shine, not with, like, a falsity or a bypassing, but, like, really energetically shine, physically shine, mentally shine. But it's cool, like, I get to share this with the audience. I had a really deep healing with you, and it was through your shamangelic process, and there was this cutting of cords. And another thing I want to talk about today is the chakras and how those can either be blocked or open for us, and how that can really serve us in our wellness and our life. But I got to share this story, like, and I know maybe you remember, maybe you don't. And I'll refresh it. So I'm laying in your home, and I'm on the table, and you were doing this ceremonial process where you're cutting the cords of all these past lovers in all the ways that I had not necessarily shown up in the highest consciousness sexually with women. And there was this moment where I turned over and you were rubbing my back, and I just cried. And there's something like, I could actually go there right now, just feeling it, you know? And I. And I was thinking about that this morning, like, how far I've come, how far you've come, how far we've all come. This rapid acceleration of consciousness and healing and letting go in the past three and a half years. And I just wanted to say thank you for that because that was such a cool moment. Like, I'm getting emotional just thinking about it right now. Like, you really walk your talk when it comes to embodying the values and the ingredients to really be there to help somebody let go of things.

Thank you.

And I think that's rare in this world. So maybe let's start there. Where were you then and where are you now as a soul, as a leader, as a businesswoman? Like, bring it back, you know, pull the E brake. Three years ago, 2019, in Sedona.

Well, I, first of all, thank you for bringing that experience up, because it just. It's such an honor to hold space for someone's healing and transformation. It's a soul calling. It's not for everybody. It's something my soul came here to do. And I had to go through my own dark night to be able to clear out my chakras, my blocked energy systems, my wounded inner child, and to be able to hold space for somebody else's pain and to be able to hold space with integrity and with compassion and with presence. And I remember one of the things that you were sharing with me at that time, for you is this deep desire to show up as a partner and to be a father. And one of the things we spoke about and one of the things that I just brought to the table was I'm like, bro, the little boy runs the grown man's days.

Yes.

And in order to not just plow through women at an unconscious rate or in an unconscious way, it's like, well, that's just the little boy. And if the little boy's. If the grown man is really seeking to be a steward for another soul and to show up for a partnership, consciously, the little boy can't be making those decisions from a wounded place, throwing tantrums and just satiating desires. Like, that's why rolling over and just holding space for the little boy so that his feelings can't. And his needs and his pains. Pain can be met and held so that it passes. If it's not supported in that way, then the little boy keeps making the choices unconsciously. We can say, oh, I want to be this and show up, but the saboteur will be like, no, I don't want to do the hard work. I want to play. I want this toy now, and I'm going to take it, which I see.

That in my son.

Right. Yeah. You know, and that's why the little boy needs a steward. And we don't want him. We don't want the little boy necessarily making the decisions for what to have for breakfast and when to go to bed, because it's not within his capacity to do. That's right.

That's right.

We need somebody else to do that for him until he's capable and he knows how to make those decisions for himself, which will be a little minute. And yes, as grown adults, if we aren't really looking at the pain and the wounds, then as grown adults, our wounded inner child's making the decisions. It was my honor to hold space for that core healing for you. And in that role, it's not brother sister. It is like Mother Mary kind of just holding a Child that's in pain without any judgment, without any agenda, without any timeline, just total safety, total presence with unconditional love that just allows the emotion to move and the feelings to be honored so that underneath that, the truth has a space to rise. So it's been so beautiful, Josh, to watch what evolved from that healing journey.

Yes.

And how you were able to access more maturity in your. Those early courting months with Carrie where you absolutely could have run. And I'm sure lots of opportunities showed up or situations showed up where it's like, I'm gonna go back to my old pattern here and just contract or run or avoid. And. And you stayed and did the work, and you're still staying and doing the work. And that's a choice every day that the grown man does.

Thank you. Thank you. There's so much there. Oh, my God. Yeah. I just. I feel that today. I didn't know we were going to talk about that at all. And it's so present. Like the. The people that we meet on our journey, you know, on this path, like the way that you've built shine and, you know, was that something that you knew was in there was like in the back of the consciousness room for you? Like, when did that actually come online? Was there a part of yourself where you had to, like, really look at the fear in you, or did you have to go through your own letting go process of like, who am I to have a brick and mortar in Sedona? Wait, what do you mean? I'm going to be having people from across the world come into my center? Like, how did you move into that? Truthfully, how did you move into that? To be able to hold that kind of a space compared to who you were three years ago when you and I first met through Almost four years ago, actually. Yeah. Yeah. Hey, it's Josh, and this is a quick break to talk about mental health. Let's face it, when you're not mentally well, eventually you become physically not well. And I believe this from my own life, my own teachings in the past two decades of being in the fitness and wellness world, I see it time and time again where the mental and physical are one, but they're often seen as separate as above. So below. You cannot have the brain inhabit the body unless the body is well. And the best way to make our body well is to take care of our adaptogenic threshold. Now, this is an interesting concept because at the point of homeostasis, or perfect balance in the body, if you want the scientific term, there are checks and balances within a system of the central nervous system, the enteric nervous system, and really in all the communication channels of the body, there are feedback systems that communicate to one another when we need nutrients. Now, most foods, even if they're organic, do not contain enough adaptogens or nutrients. These are special herbs and compounds that only appear in the highest quality superfoods on the planet. And they're scarce, they're hard to source. This is why my friend Drew Canole has made such an impact with organifi, not only in my own personal life, but in the life of my family and in literally tens of thousands of people who have heard about and purchased organifi. Because of this podcast, you can benefit just like they all have. All you have to do is go to joshtrent.com organifi o r g A N I F I and use the code WellnessForce to get 20% off your entire order, which is a massive grandfather savings. You won't find a better price on the Internet, even including Amazon. Trust me, we've scoured it. Head over to joshtrand.com Organifi use the code WellnessForce to save 20% off your red green gold juices. All the healthy supplements, the proteins, the pure, the adaptogens, they're all very challenging to source. I know Drew personally. He spends a lot of time and energy with his entire team sourcing out the organically made adaptogens. The red juice is my all time favorite. There's the cordyceps, the reishi, the red beet. All organic and it freaking tastes amazing. You can get rid of the pre workouts that get you all amped up with fake caffeine and you can bring yourself back home to homeostasis. That's what adaptogens do. Joshtrend.com Organifi use the code WellnessForce to.

Save 20% off so, you know, I've been doing transformational healing work full time for over two decades and it was my own healing practice. Seeing a lot of clients and, you know, one on one doing groups and coaching and, you know, training facilitator training for lightworkers. Because I really feel it's valuable to pass what I've learned and the tools in my medicine bag on to others so that we can really bring more lightworkers and healers online that have powerful tools for transformation are not just scratching the surface. Because when I was going through my dark night of the soul, counseling and talking about it was not sufficient. I mean, I needed something a lot more real, a lot more impactful. A lot more deep and a lot more transformational and quicker because I'm like, look, I am a single mom now with twins that are three years old. If I don't get my shit sorted, it's gonna get passed on, and I'm not interested in that. And so I really wanted transformative tools early on. And so I've dedicated the last two decades of my life providing support and transformation for people that are going through their awakening, their dark night, their stepping up, getting them the tools that we all didn't get necessarily as kids or as adult. Conscious relationships and clear boundaries and all those things. And years ago, my mom would come in when I was a little girl and say, good morning, sunshine. Rise and shine. And that did stay with me. Like, that word shine. And it's. It's. It's. It was a seed she planted in me as a gps. As I figured out how my light was being dimmed, where and why, where. Where others were involved in that, where I was involved in that, and how to reclaim that and how to shine it authentically. And, like, in the process of doing that, then it's been my soul path to support other people finding their radiance and reclaiming their light, their power, their truth in an authentic way. And years ago, when we met, concept came in. A voice came in and said, inspire millions to shine. I'm like, millions. Huh? Huh. You know, like, I'm hitting hundreds. Okay. Solid. I'm solidly hitting hundreds each year solidly, with client sessions and all of that. And I'm like. And with who I'm training, I'm like, hitting a solid half a mil. Half a thousand, you know? Yeah. And I realized I kept reaching my ceiling of capacity of how many people I could impact in a year. And that's one of the reasons why I started the podcast, which is now on hold, because Shines got my attention. But it was like, okay, I could reach more through the podcast. What else can I do where I can reach more? And I kept reaching a ceiling of how many I could impact with the way my business was structured. And I kept having this feeling is I need to. I need to open a bigger space that can reach more people. And the idea of shine a brick and mortar came in in the middle of COVID As businesses, a lot of.

Good ideas came through for people. Yay. When we're squeezed that tight, good things come out sometimes.

I know. And, you know, like, businesses were shutting down, like, and people were going bankrupt that did have brick and mortar. Yeah. There was a lot of, you know, don't touch anybody, don't hug anybody, don't be in six feet. I'm like, no, that's my business. I hug and touch. Like, like, if that was the case, then I couldn't have held you and like nourished you if I had to keep six, six feet distance from you. Like, no way. Like, part of the healing is through touch, I feel, is transmitted through the human expression of, of compassion that somebody can physically feel. And I'm like, well, shit, you know, open a brick and mortar now and like, k spirit, fuck off. Because that's just. I won't respond to that.

That was perfect for those of you who couldn't hear that her phone said, I won't respond to that in the next room.

And that's the thing. When a soul calling happens, that feels too big or it's not the right time or it's just too scary. Our phone first response is to say no. And spirit was like, okay, I hear you. And you can only say no if your response isn't coming from fear, doubt, or lack. And when I looked at all of my reasonings of saying no, because we can always put a pause on the soul path. We can always put a pause on, on divine guidance. We can just say no, override, you know, snooze button, ignore. And I was backing up. And when I looked at every reason that I had for not doing this, every single one of those were either fear of, well, I'll get shut down or I'm not going to be prosper, I'm not going to be successful, or lack, I don't have the money, I don't have the resources, I don't have the support or doubt. I don't know if I can do this. I haven't run a brick and mortar like this before, like my inexperience, all of that. And it was like spirit kept saying, we'll take care of those things. You just take the next step. And that when you're on this soul path and soul calling, it really does test your faith. And I stepped back from a business that was thriving. Shamangelic healing was doing great in Sedona. And even in that Covid year was one of the best years that I had because I had so many tools to help people through the chaos with support and guidance that I just flipped and went online and started helping so many people during that time where other people weren't and they were in chaos. I like dove in, I'm like, hey, this is go time for me. I'm here to support people through chaos. And now that that's all settled, it was like, it's time for me to open this space. And I'm like, okay, spirit. I'm. I'm trusting. I'm. I'm trusting. And, you know, my hands just kind of had to come back here. And I just kept hearing, take the next two steps. Take the next two steps. And sometimes those were easy steps, like, do some research or go look at some. Go look at some spaces. And then there was. I would get to the. The steps that I was avoiding from fear, like asking for help or asking for financial support from investors. It was like, okay, is there anything else on the list that I can do before I do that one? I was like, no, that's the next one. So taking those steps were. Was showing me, in order to step into this, all of those things that were in the way of me shining, the way of me stepping up and finding this new set of wings. And it's still this process to this day is that the process of birthing this and stewarding this keeps showing me all of my blind spots. What's in the way of true radiance? Where's lack Fear still rising? Where is there an old pattern that is sabotaging that very thing that I'm trying to grow? Where am I leaning into fear over faith? Where am I not asking for help? Where am I putting everybody else's needs in front of my own? And I'm like, I'm in it for sure. The rewards, though, and this is what's different about your soul path versus when you're asleep. The rewards are so much greater than the challenges and the costs. There's so much. They nourish the soul at such a deep level. I'm in tears so often about the transformation and the beauty and the impact that Shine is already having when I see Shine inspiring millions to shine, whether it's 25 people in a breath work or a little boy that comes in for the first time and he. And he tries the gong, and I see that something just changed in him when he gets to have that experience. Families or couples that are taking their pictures in front of the wings, the tears that are shed, the power that is reclaimed, the tools that are learned. I'm like, this is it. This is it. This. It's happening right now. Everything that I said, thought, and dreamed, I'm now in the 3D manifestation of it. And this space is inspiring millions to shine.

I'm excited to come visit.

I know.

So y' all need to go to Sedona and visit Shine. Right now, it's on a street called Coffee Pot. Is that.

It's. Yeah, it's in a big center.

I love the street names in Sedona. They're so quaint. You know, something that I was feeling when you were sharing was, I flashed back to early 2020. We had moved from Sedona, and then we went to Hawaii, and then we went to San Diego. And right when we got our place overlooking the ocean, overlooking the bay, boom, the lockdowns hit.

Yeah.

And, like, it just devastated me because it was my dream to, like, have children and live in San Diego. But sometimes Spirit has other plans, you know, Creator has plans that sometimes are so hard to swallow and so hard to accept because it's so painful, the attachment that I have that we have to. How we think it should be. And I wonder for you, like, did you. In the process of opening Shine, you know, was there a part of yourself where you were, like, you recognizing. Maybe the ego said, it has to be this way or I need to have it like this. And you had to deal with the waves or the sadness or the grief of things not working out like you wanted to. You had to literally walk your talk as a shamangelic healer, and you had to receive what was actually coming through for you instead of what you, quote, were trying to force or wanted to put into place. Like, what was. Maybe there was many, but what was, like, the biggest one, that you had to take an honest look at where you were attached. And you had to deal with the lesson of being healthily unattached over and.

Over and over every day, Josh. Over and over. And it's not uncommon, the parenting journey, because we can have these expectations of how we think our child should be or how it's supposed to go. And then reality sets in. And every day I get humbled by what does Shine want? Not does. What do. What do I want and what will serve this best? Not what does my ego want and when. For sure, timing. Because my. My agenda is, let's go. Let's get profitable right now. I. I'm not waiting.

That's a good CEO. Yeah.

Let's go.

Sure. Sure.

And in listening, which is the same thing as a parent of listening and let the. Letting the child lead about their timing and what they need and what they want as a soul. I. I just keep listening. What does Shine want? Okay, we try different things, or I try different things. Whether it's hiring this person or trying this format with events and things like that. Then I get to sit back in the feminine and listen and feel, is this working? Is it sustainable? Is it thriving? And be honest about this system isn't working for us. We gotta scratch it now. Do I wanna scratch it? No. Do I throw a tantrum? Sure. And the reality is we've got to start over with this particular system. It's not meeting our needs. Thought it would, but it's not. And the quicker I can surrender with that, sometimes I'm really great at that. And sometimes it takes me a little bit of time to catch up with something that's not in alignment, whether it's a staff member or like, we had the. From the very beginning, there was this mural, these 14 foot golden wings which are in the center of the main sanctuary.

I saw those.

Yeah, they're stunning.

They were already there when you.

No, no. You painted them. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was, that was a vision long before we even had a location that I knew was going to be on the wall. And that process of. Even the process of finding the space, thinking, it's here and no, it's not, it's going to be over here. And the process of, oh, this investor is going to help. No, they're not. Just, okay, there's a better investor coming. And just that trust of if there's a pivot, which there is so often, like every day, oh, I thought this, this new hire or this program's manager or this manager was gonna be this way. And it's like, yeah, for the first month and now not. And the sooner I can get on board with the reality of it, throw my little tantrum, the sooner I can surrender and be like, okay, what's the solution here? What's the lesson here? And where am I in the way? Cause a lot of times, Josh, it's a management skill that I need to refine, or it's being better at hiring or it's managing my time better. So that. Or self care. Prioritizing self care.

Wow, I'm glad you have a lot of hats then. Shit, you probably have a hundred hats.

So many. Yes.

Literally. I mean, literally and figuratively. You have many hats.

And you know, like, with those wings as an example, I saw it on the wall and, you know, had had one particular muralist come in and they started designing it and I'm like, I'm not feeling it. And they had this dark rendition with like brown pointy wings. And I'm like, there's also something about trusting your intuition and trusting your inner knowing that even if other people are saying, hey, this is it. And this. This particular muralist was like, no, you're not honoring my creative vision. I know what's right, and this is gonna be incredible. And you're stifling my creativity. And I get to sit with that and hear that and also listen to shine and like, but what does she want? Not what do I want or what does this muralist want, but what is the truth? What is really wanting to be expressed here? And I'm like, I hear you, that I'm stifling your creativity. And I think we're good here. I think I'll take it from here. Which, in other words, like, bye, bye and thank you. Because I'll find somebody that really does hear the vision in alignment with what I'm feeling.

That can be so hard. Because sharpening intuition only comes through life experience. You can't get pass that on from your parents or society. You actually have to go through kind of the cuts and the scrapes and the bloodiness of sharpening your own intuitive sword, but along the path of doing that. And I can imagine everybody feels this, whether they're like a intrapreneur entrepreneur, a mom that wants to do amazing, a dad that wants to do amazing, just a human being that has some kind of path, some kind of dream.

Well. And I think I find that the sharpening of the intuition comes from the life lessons of not listening to it.

Yeah.

Where. Where I. And there's been enough times where I didn't trust myself. And then it's like, I knew it. I knew that wasn't the right way, and I didn't say anything or I let this person bulldoze me, whether it was in a relationship or business. And I didn't honor my truth. And so enough of those. And that's the actual third chakra around integrity and truth and the courage to really honor that.

Yeah.

Because that's where inner radiance comes from, is that it's not for this person. Even though they're the expert, they're the expert in, you know, murals. And I'm not. I'm new at this. I also don't have to bypass my own truth to accommodate their desires or their needs or their opinions. And I'm like, I can hear your opinion that you don't normally work like this. And I'm like, okay, I hear that. And I'm still not changing my truth about it. I still feel like it's light and golden and airy and fluffy and sparkly. It's not sharp and pointy and brown. And if we couldn't come into a common vision, then it's okay for me to say, hey, thank you for getting us this far. I respect you. I appreciate you. We're good. Bygones. I'm gonna let go now, and I'm gonna trust the right muralist is coming. And I think so many lessons along, the dream is this is not in alignment. I get to be upset about it, sad or frustrated. And it's still true that I need to step into what feels in greater alignment and trust. The next muralist that came in, she was channeling such divine mastery that the mural is so activated, so high vibration, she added things that I didn't even know were possible. And that's the reward that happens when you do trust your intuition and when you are allowing the divine creator source, your higher self, whatever you call it, to guide you. Magic happens.

Yes.

Over and over and over again.

We get a really big somatic experience when something's wrong. Some people. Some people call it a gut feeling. But, I mean, depending on if your gut brain axis or if your digestion is off, your gut feeling might actually just be from trauma or hypervigilance. So I'm really curious about this, and I've been thinking about this in my own life, too. When I have an intuitive hit about something, it's not like it's this punch sledgehammer for intuition that might be instinctual. Like if some. If somebody's trying to hurt my child, that's a sledgehammer moment. I'm going to go chase and defend. But intuition, it's like this, you know, like the feather in your cap, it kind of tickles us. So intuitively when you have this muralist, and for any of us that they're doing anything that we love or care about, there's this moment where we get that initial tickle or we get that initial feeling. What are the structures that humans create in our brains? Because it ain't in our heart. In our brains, we create a structure that kind of ignores that tickle, that ignores that intuitive. It's not a hit. It's more like a nudge, like a soft nudge.

You're talking absolutely about the solar plexus, the third chakra around light, truth, and integrity. So when you get that kind of inner knowing and feeling and it is really in your gut, it's there. It really is what? And it connects with our belief system. So the sixth chakra around, well, what are my thoughts? And so here comes self doubt. This person knows More than me. They are the expert or they are. They know better than me. And so as little kids and as young adults, we were taught not to listen to that. And I know what's better for you. So there's this learned behavior of oppressing our inner knowing and that outsourcing what is right or what is supposed to happen or the path you're supposed to take to somebody else. So it becomes second nature. Not our primary nature, but it becomes our learned behavior to doubt ourselves and our learned behavior to outsource truth and guidance or validation to somebody else. Am I doing it right, coach? Am I doing it right, teacher? Am I pleasing you, parent? And that's the beginning of self abandonment. And so insecurity begins to take seed. So when you have that inner voice and inner knowing, there hasn't been this practice muscle of trusting that which is with someone like you. More that is coming with conscious parenting is allowing that space to be cultivated and rewarded within your child. Or children coming that knows that they know what feels right for them. Not like, hey, you need to stick with this sport. It's like, but if you. I began to really trust that with my kids that if they really didn't want to play soccer, I'm like, tell me more. Not, well, you signed up for it. You have to finish it. But it's like, tell me more. Tell me why. So that I could see if there were valid reasons or if it was just fear and I need support or I need a tool or I need more practice so that I have more confidence in this sport.

That's such a more blended way of exploring, like the old school. My father would have said, well, do that because I said so. And I think we've all felt that at times. Like, maybe you even received that from your parents. No explanation of why things were or why a choice was good for you. It was simply because I said so. And there's nothing to learn from that. Like, that probably shuts off our intuitiveness in. In that you said it was the solar plexus chakra, and that's power.

So this is where dad or parent, because I said so, is basically throwing a blanket on the individual's light.

And that parent didn't know. They were probably told that is just all wretch and no vomit to quell Alan Watts. Like, so when that blanket gets thrown on, like, what do we do next?

Right?

What comes after that?

You know, that's where our power got taken away in that moment. And that's connected to the throat chakra. That Says, hey, when I said I don't want to play soccer or I don't want to go sit on Uncle Johnny's lap because I don't feel safe with them. And it's like, no, do what you said. Do you know, do what I tell you because I said so. And not having that explanation, then the cell, the seed of self doubt begins. And also if I'm me, I get shamed or if I express I'm not safe. So we also realize that not only if I shine and if I express my feelings, whether it's emotion or my truth, I like this, I don't like that. I prefer this gender and not that gender, I want music instead of accounting. We realize that, oh, not only are my feelings, so that's kind of more the second chakra, like my desires or my emotions or my truth, that third, my identity are not safe, then when I go express it, it's not even safe for me to express. So now we've got a couple different things working there that I can't even express what I want or how I feel. It's not safe. So here begins oppression, not only of light, power, truth, but also emotions and voice. So that just that one thing, do this because I told you so, has quite a few impacts on all of the chakras. And, and if it's not safe, if we add physical harm to that, because I said so, or I'll give you something to cry about, which I certainly heard that from my dad. And he did give me things that I cried about, screamed about and were painful. And so now those things are connected to pain or judgment or ridicule. So it's pretty reinforced. We're going to shut that down.

Yeah. And then that learned behavior manifests with sometimes, a lot of times physical disease, of course. Right. Like, so let's, let's start here. When you look at the chakras as an energy system, you know, that's the, I guess you could say that's the most authentic way to explain it. But in the west, it's kind of like meridians energy. It's actually so cosmic and so vast that even if we tried to understand it, we try to intellectualize these concepts with our mind, but you can't intellectualize healing and you can't intellectualize spirituality either. So I'm gonna do the best I can to ask you a intellectual question so that we can understand it from your articulation. So when a chakra is blocked and there's actually like, like you had mentioned a blanket over It. How does that. Exactly what are the symptoms and signs that. That our health is suffering because of an energy center, not because of a diet choice or, you know, because of being bathed in emf? There's many different ways we can heal. But how do we actually identify what is our intuitive faculty that we can identify when a chakra is actually blocked?

Great question. And so much of that, so, so many of us have had the oppression of our emotions because maybe. And you know, your kiddo is like, yeah, sometimes he has his emotional outbursts in public, at a restaurant, in a store. Yeah.

For a long time.

Yeah, exactly. And it's like natural and normal, but it's. Oh, here comes social shame. What will they think? What do you think? Now I've got it. Like, it's inconvenient. It's not the right time. You know, we're at church, we're at the store, these kinds of things. And so we've learned and from different experiences to shut down and bottle those emotions. So the physical correlation of that energy being blocked or pushed down is we're going to have digestive issues, which is, you know, really common. And there's going to be anger and resentment. So that's kind of in the liver where there's been a wrong or we felt like our voice was silent, or when dad said, no my way or the highway, this is how it's going to be. And we have anger and resentment, but we're not safe to share it. Then it's not uncommon to crave alcohol to put out that fire, because there's not a safe, safe or healthy way to express anger and rage. And if I can't go toe to toe with my dad, I'm too small. I.

He.

He's. He's got the power here. So this is where liver issues, stomach issues, acidity starts to happen. And then that creates more physical disease in the body. And if I believe that my voice doesn't matter. If I believe I'm not safe, I just. The nervous system connecting to those beliefs start this whole cascade of chemicals in the body where I don't feel safe. And so that in itself creates dissonance in the body, and the organs and the glands start contracting because they're in fight or flight. They're not in. I'm okay, I'm safe. I can be me. I can express my truth.

I.

My, my parents, I can trust my parents. They're not going to squash me, harm me, or belittle me. And so the nervous system being in fight or flight and the brain believing we're not true, we're not safe creates this whole secondary issue of dis ease in the body that is, is related to physical things and cravings for sugar, for comfort, and for different things that will sedate or put a blanket on that or keep us safe. So this is, this is, this is where our intuitive coping mechanisms come in and we do the best we can. Put up a wall, get small, fake it, sedate, run, hide, blame. Those become our coping mechanisms and survival strategies, which are fantastic.

They keep us alive.

They keep us alive. Like kudos, like we've all used them, they're useful sometimes, they're just not long term strategies. So we take them into adulthood and we don't upgrade them. So run, hide, blame, sedate, ignore, get small, become our adult coping strategies. Which is back to what we said, look, that isn't going to be a dad holding space for a partnership and, and stewarding another soul. We're just going to be passing on those behaviors and those things down to the next generation.

This hits a part of me because so many people that we have on the podcast in some way on a hot tub, we all get to this point of awareness, right? It's like if we all know that awareness of something or awareness of our ailments or awareness of our stuff is actually the starting point, I just find myself asking like, well, why the hell don't we just increase our awareness? Like, is it this light source switch? You know, can we flick it? I don't think it is. I think it's this kind of fumbling, tumbling process where we learn by pain. And that's just the design that God, that Creator wanted for us to have is to learn by pain. I just, I feel like there's got to be a better way. And maybe we're moving in that direction. Like, maybe that's what quote the collective awakening is, is that we don't always have to learn by the contrast of deep, dark grief and pain. We can learn through joy, through that reward process and kind of flip the serotonin triangle over so we're not getting beat down so much by life. What do you make of that?

We're talking about evolution here. We're talking about evolution. So we get to learn a couple things from our ancestors or from our parents. We wouldn't be alive today if some of the things that they did didn't work. Some of the things that they did, whether it's resilience, hard work, get back up, you know, worked, or else the bloodline wouldn't have survived.

Yeah.

Let's be honest. Grateful for them, you know, so there's something about our bloodline that we can say, let me take the best of this. And there's also something. And with parents, I think it's really valuable because our role is to. To do the best we can, of course. And, and, and same with our parents. And I learned from my parents so many things that I wanted to pass on to my kids. Good things, good family values and hard work. A lot of different things. And also. Oh, hell no. I also learned what. No, no, no. Veto override upgrade.

Here is your gift back.

Yeah.

And.

And there is great value in being past what doesn't work work. And so sometimes what will be passed to us will. Will be. Will show violence, physical abuse in the home or alcoholism or mental disease because something didn't get healed or we didn't ask for help. And so it's just as valuable, I feel, not as easy, but it's just as valuable for us to be past puzzle pieces that fit and also puddle puzzle pieces that are totally jacked, that are not it totally corrupt files. Okay. The. And one of those was, for me, was violence passed down like some hurt people. Hurt people of like, okay, my dad's pain got passed and in violence overflowed out of him. And I experienced some of that. And it was like, okay, this is one of those where it stops here with me. I'm not going to pass violence on to my kids. Like, that's. That's a. Hell, no. And I'm not going to pass addiction on to my kids. So I'm going to change those things. And I think because of the visceral pain that we experienced, we're highly motivated to do it differently, and that's contributing to evolution. So that it's like, I've got to flip this puzzle piece because I don't want my kids to feel the same pain I did. And which is. Which is a beautiful motivation to then say, doesn't mean I have the answer. I know what it isn't. So what can I do differently? And we're fumbling around our best trying to flip those puzzle pieces, and we're going to be trying different things, and our kids will also take the best and also go, yeah, dad, Mom, I'm like, I see what you did here, but I'm not going to follow that. I'm going to follow my own drum. Which they will evolve as well. And they have the opportunity, their choice. They don't have to. They don't have to evolve. None of us have to evolve. Because I could certainly have just passed this on, then I'm not contributing into evolution, which. It's a choice and it's optional. And I think that pain is one of the things that motivates us. And we have more tools than our parents and our grandparents ever had.

20, 30 times more, way more.

It was like with my, with my grandfather, like, you know, alcohol, physical, you know, abuse in Montana, ranching. Tough, tough, tough times. We didn't talk about her feelings. There weren't men's group to support.

It was basically early Yellowstone. You know that TV show, Yellowstone?

Yeah, yeah.

It was kind of like. Like that.

And so recognizing that we are evolving and we do have more support, we have books, we have online programs, we have support groups. Healing, transformation. There's more dialogue about it, more resources, free podcasts like this. And so we also have tools that our grandparents and parents didn't have. And so we, because of that, we also have the responsibility to contribute to evolution.

Oh, my God, that was so good. Like, I just crunched my hand. That was so good. Because it's not that it's a shaming that I'm about to say or like a throwing of the responsibility, but damn, it's a slap in the face to our ancestors for us with these extra tools, with this extra knowledge, with the extra awareness for us to not do the healing work. It really kind of spits in their face. Like, they would have done it if they knew, but they didn't know. Like your parents, my parents, they just simply did not know. Right? It's not. It's not to shame them. And I know you and I have heard this concept, like, okay, our parents did the best they could with the level of consciousness that they had. And like, I get that. But also, if they were to be in our shoes and they were to live the lives that we are now living and learning from, they probably would have done exactly what you and I are doing if they knew. It's like this little dark spot in the corner where it's like this unconscious incompetence that they don't even know they don't know. And so for that aspect, like, God, there's so much compassion that's needed there. And it's not like I'm trying to say that everyone should do their healing work and hurry up and do the healing, but it's like, when else are we going to do it? When else are we actually going to do the healing work? Something you said previously that I want to Touch on. You said something so cool. It was this beautiful metaphor. You said that we get these seeds of doubt and seeds of insecurity planted in our psyche. And so I feel like it's this. I wonder how you feel. We have to essentially close our eyes and tap into our own garden, right where our soul plays and lives. Like, kind of like your mom said, hey, good morning, Rise and shine. Like, that's a core memory of yours that fuels you from a place of love. But if there's too much insecurity and doubt that's been planted, no one's essentially cleaned the garden. No one's pulled out the weeds and the bullshit from the garden that doesn't serve. It's going to be almost impossible for us to truly shine if we don't take the responsibility or if we don't pull in the right ingredients and support and scaffolding to allow us to fucking pull the shit out of the garden that doesn't serve us. Good Lord. Like, that's really what we're talking about. So how do we start that process? That's a whole podcast of its own. How do we start that process of, like, pruning and weeding the garden so that we can remove the seeds of doubt and the seeds of insecurity so that we can actually shine? What does that look like?

And that's one of the. That's what my healing practice, you know, shamangelic healing is all about. That's what shine is all about. So that it first starts with, I'm ready. This is my garden. It's my garden. And like, taking accountability and ownership. And it's where the victim starts taking steps to saying, I don't want this to be this way anymore. I don't want to be rageful. I don't want to be in unconscious relationships. I don't. I'm tired of repeating these patterns. And I really have come to respect the timing of that. That when somebody is ready and I have been that person that has tried to shake, to shake somebody awake. Like, no, you're ready because I want you to be ready. It's. It's making me nauseous. Watching all of the weeds grow in your garden, in the self sabotage.

Can I pull some out for you?

Exactly. And that judgment, that disrespect to somebody else's timing and their process and their journey that says they may not be ready or want to shift their depression or clean up the patterns because it's not their timing, it's not a priority. They don't see it yet. And I have come to deeply respect that. And as, as a healer that's really, really essential that you're not imposing will or your expectations or your timeline on another soul.

That's good.

And, and my family has been great teachers about this. I've tried to shake my dad awake, let's see, without his consent. I've tried to shake my brother sober again without his consent. And so I think that there's something important to receive, expect that when somebody is ready in their own time, in their own way. Like you were ready because the desire for family was superseding the desire to just have short term pleasure. Exactly. And so at some point there was a satiation of this isn't serving me any longer. And I got really respectful expect coming to that. And it's that level of I'm ready. And so this is what shine is about, this is what my healing practice is about. This is what I teach in my courses is like okay, let's meet you in your readiness. Okay. And let's start with the core weeds of trauma. Because we're not going to get to empowerment and reclaiming our power and forgiving other people and finding our light and our truth until we go and hold space for the wounded part, the oppressed little boy or little girl, the angry fierce. That was shitty and that shouldn't have happened like the truth. And so that's where I feel it's essential to create a fertile space for, for the emotional release, for the expression, emotional expressions to have voice now that got stuffed and oppressed at 4, 7, 17, whenever, all of it. And so that's where shamangelic breath work or private healing sessions hold a space without shame that says go ahead and cry, honor your grief, your sadness about the losses, the deaths, the betrayals, where you thought it was going to go this way and it didn't. Or you thought this person you could trust and you couldn't or where you self abandoned and you went down a different path. The people that you've hurt, your guilt and shame, let's go ahead and give that a safe space. So I think that that's one and safe space also because that's more the second chakra around our emotions and our watery feelings. Grief, sadness, shift shame and also hold space for the fiery emotions that's up there in the solar plexus. It says that was effed up this person, how dare you bullying me? Yeah, this is bush. And so then also holding space without judgment or oppression for rage. And the first time that I did breath Work. And the first time, like, I was going through my dark night of the soul, the first time I got full permission, it wasn't like just angry. I was like, fierce dragon lady, overflowing volcano, incinerating everything in its path. And it's like, let me let this out, because it's causing me to drink. It's causing, like, this passive aggressiveness. I'm quick to anger, and if I don't release the volcano inside me, then it's going to come out and overflow onto my kids. Like, my dad's volcano overflowed onto me. So I'm like, safe space for the anger and the rage. So when I. I think that the first step is, when you're ready, is find qualified. Not all are qualified practitioners. Not all can leave you more whole. So find qualified practitioners that allow you to support that emotional release. And then it doesn't end there, because that's just throwing the tantrum. Now how can we mend, how can we reclaim? How can we give you new tools so that you have reclaiming your voice? You learn clear boundaries, self trust, how to understand the signals in your body, how to hold space for your process so that you learn how to reparent yourself? And. And then it's a process of, of learning new tools that, let's be honest, you weren't. You wouldn't be where you are if you had the tools. And you're going to stay where you are if you don't learn other tools to consciously handle your stress, your emotion, and practice your inner voice.

All of those things I. I love. I actually feel like the sequential order that you talked about is perfect perfection. Because the analogy of, like, if you, if you have a dirty garage and it's filled with crap that you haven't used, but it's weighing you down, and you try to put new tools in a garage that's overflowing, nothing's gonna work. You have to actually do the work, like you said, of cleaning out all the crap and all the old ways of being maybe even the old coping mechanisms that are just like, so asking for reprieve. Like, please, like, for me, it was pornography, right? Like, oh, my God, how do I let this go? How do I let go of this? Like, what is. Maybe it was in. At some point in your life, you battled with alcohol, right? So, like, we all. I don't know any healer or anyone that has a heart. They speak into the world that hasn't dealt with, like, the throes of addiction or, or the hands of Watiko that just like grabs them, you know, And I feel like that's part of the birthing process for. For you to actually live your life on purpose. So I wonder, like, with that contrast, someone's doing the work of cleaning it all out. It doesn't always have to be through a quote, peak experience. People can go get some gentle breath work or they can go get a healing session. But unfortunately, what I see, and I want you to shine light on this, unfortunately, what I see in our world is that there's a lot of people that are master marketers and they know exactly what to say and exactly how to present themselves, especially with AI and all the tools that we have now, as if it's something that they're not. They haven't actually done the work to embody the grace, the fortitude, the healing capacity to reach inside of someone and hold them in a proper way. But it seems like they're able to because of what is experienced on Instagram or experienced in marketing. So I wonder if you could talk about peak experiences. It doesn't always have to be going to an ayahuasca session, getting a crazy five hour cathartic breathwork session that actually might leave somebody more wounded than when they started because the practitioner learned it in a single day course or something. Talk about that. The peak experiences. And how do peak experiences in a healthy way, come into the process of the weeding of the garden?

Yeah, and I think that that's individual because one size does not fit all. One solution does not fit all. And that's why I think it's where I find the most transformation in the people that I'm working with, is can I just listen to where they're at so that I can be present with what pathway in will serve them best? Because sometimes that is more just holding space for their tenderness. Sometimes it's just allowing them to weep and be heard and be held. That's where the contact comes in. That's where the eye contact, the presence, the heart, like, just like, wow, that is so healing. And sometimes it's being the truth teller, like, okay, brother, yeah, I hear you. And the grown man stays. The little boy runs. And if you're really wanting this, you gotta stay. And so sometimes it's being the truth teller that is very different medicine. If I was just like coddling your inner child when it's time to move out of that now and learn new skills and step up and be a man. And so part of that is intuiting. Do they need tenderness? Do they need a Truth teller, do they need a cheerleader like you can do this. Step up. You got it, you got it. Or do they need a teacher? Here's a new way of coping. Instead of this, let's practice this tool about clear boundaries. And so sometimes they need a teacher or coach because they don't have the tool, they don't know how. And I think that that is meeting people where they are and tailoring what's going to be the most helpful right now. And that's going to change based on where somebody is. And you came to the empowerment and awakening weekend, which is where a lot of those tools happen all at once. Where you learn about the chakras, you learn about clear boundaries, you learn about the feminine and masculine and conscious relationships so that you can start to see yourself and the other, the villain, your story, your truth, yourself with a different lens and learn different tools along the way so that you begin to self empower and you learn how to clear your garden as you're going and you learn different tools so lest we you're not repeating the pattern and you pull a weed and three more come in. Because you didn't learn a sustainable tool to do it differently. You didn't learn from the past because that's where you know a lot of the emotional release. It's wonderful. You release the emotion from the trauma, but you didn't learn the lesson of the trauma. And so or you didn't learn the lesson of the experience. So then it's going to repeat. So great, you had a release, that's a great start. But if you don't look at your part in it or what the lesson is, then we're, we're just going to backslide again. You'll go back to the substance, you go back to the porn, you'll go back to the pattern again. And I'm about empowerment, not just about release, because that to me is sustainable. Transformation is to give someone the tools to learn how to garden and not be dependent on me or somebody else to do it for them.

Yes, I see this. Where people might run to the peak experiences, which is fine, like that's part of the evolution. But if there's a running to the peak experience on a continuous basis and there's no spaciousness or guidance on how to integrate a lesson that comes through that peak experience, then one may just have a proclivity to go back to another peak experience because quote, the one before didn't work. Or the one before might have touched a part of my soul, like oh ayahuasca, told me this. It's like, great. What did you do with it?

That's the.

What did you do with what she told you?

Yeah.

Because when you go back, she's gonna tell you the same thing again.

I remember I was in Peru one time. You know, I brought groups down there eight different times. And I remember I was down there one time in Cusco, and this guy came up to me and grabbed my shoulders. Hey, you've got to come to this, you know, this ayahuasca ceremony tonight, you know, we're celebrating my 111th journey. And I was like, wow, dude, congratulations. What? Didn't you hear the first 110 times? And you know what?

You actually said that to him?

I did. I'm like, beautiful, congratulations. You know, my question is, what did you not hear the first 110 times? And, you know, ayahuasca has its place. It has been medicine for me in the right place at the right time. Just like a glass of wine can be a medicine or a poison. So can ice cream be a medicine or a poison? So can breath work be a medicine or poison? And if we're not looking at what is my motivation, what is my why, and do I actually need this, will it leave me more whole? Then we're just in an avoidant addictive pattern again. And that's where one size doesn't fit all. And just because a thing worked doesn't mean it will work again. Or just because it worked for somebody else doesn't mean it's the right thing for me. And that goes back to that inner intuition that says, what do I need right now? And I think it's. It's not just, hey, what did a plant medicine journey tell me? Or what is a healing? Or what is this card that I pulled today? We're stubborn. We don't want to hear the truth a lot of times because that means I have to let go of my teddy bear. Or that means I have to, like, change something. And so you said earlier, hey, you know, if our ancestors knew their blind spot.

Yeah.

You know, they. They might have made a different choice. Well, let's be honest. Were those right now that are not seeing our blind spot, that we're quite crafty at avoidance. We're quite, quite crafty at leaning on to whatever ways the status quo stays put and we don't have to grow or change.

Yeah.

And, you know, we're all having our own level of awareness and transformation there of, like, what we're willing to change and what we're not yet. And that's okay. And it takes courage to be doing the work. And we'll be ready for some of it and not ready for. For others. And then. And that's. That's okay. The pain will be the motivator. Like you said earlier of like, this isn't working any longer. And I've done a lot of cleanup work after ceremonies. We've talked about this before where it's been too much indulgence in a thing. Whether it's sex or ayahuasca or sugar or alcohol, it's still the same cleanup process of Let me take accountability for the state of where I am. And what is it trying just asking the question, not through guilt or shame, but what is this showing me?

Yeah.

And what is the lesson here? And what support do I need to make a change? If I'm ready to make a change, it's wise.

It's really wise that everybody plays that back again and listens to it for the second or third time. Because I feel like, let's create this for people that are with us. I feel like from my life experience, it's. There's an on ramp to peak experiences. And if you just run to the peak experience without doing kind of like the flow, the groundwork, the floor work of like, first understand what it's like to take a full breath in your body and what that actually does for you. Then know what it's like to do a loving kindness meditation. Then maybe go to a vipassana, then do some float tanks, then try some very light microdosing that's guided. Then go to an emotional intelligence weekend, like maybe something that you throw in Sedona. Then with pre peri and post integration. Then go to a peak experience like a ceremony with psilocybin or ayahuasca. That's the on ramp that I would create based on my life experiences and my lessons. So what would you create? What would be an on ramp for people to intelligently move towards healing with the vehicle of a peak experience. What does that look like?

Well, I go back to. That's individual. I don't think any on ramp will fit everybody. And not everybody needs or is supposed to have a peak experience. And so I think that people learn differently from different experiences and life experience is a great teacher. If we just look back and take the time to look back and say, let me look at the peak experiences of my life, the peak joys and what was working? What was I choosing? What was. What were my priorities and beliefs when I was Totally shining and in my power and in the peak lows, where was I? What? Where did I give my power away? Where did I get lost? Who was I following? What was I believing? Where did I get lost? I feel that you can learn so much from sitting the same way you would in a ceremony with total presence and intention, with the classroom of your life, and that you can learn a lot. It's just not as sexy. But the thing is, is that plant medicine or a great healer is going to take you back to those places anyway of, like, let's learn from the imprints, the peaks and the lows. Because there are clues about what to do, what you want to repeat, what you want to lean into your best self. And there's also hella clues about how you got lost, how you gave your power away, where a belief system wasn't true and you followed it, and how to reclaim those things back. And that how you do that. There can be many ways to do that, whether it's through meditation, whether it's through workshops, whether it's through healing journeys. And then it's like, what for everybody? And I really appreciate you and I both lean heavily into the integration piece. Because now what we're talking about is the crown chakra of awareness. Oh, I see where the path. I see where I took the wrong path, or I see where my power was taken, or I gave it away. Because now we're looking at the sixth chakra around perception, belief, and the crown around awareness and truth. And now will I bring it down into my body? Will I bring it in? Will I make space? And the breathwork sessions that I just led here in Austin this last weekend as we came out of the breathwork ceremonies, I'm like, what is now true that you didn't know was true before? What did your soul tell you that you couldn't hear before? What did your heart. What advice did your heart give you that you weren't ready before? And now that you've made sense, space, let's let these truths, let's literally breathe them in and make space in the body. I am enough, or my voice matters like truths. And if that's true, then that changes a lot of things. Because if I'm enough, then this relationship that doesn't see me that way or this belief that doesn't validate me, I can let go of that situation now. Because if I'm enough, then this doesn't fit any longer. And if my voice matters, then I don't have to sedate it. I don't have to quiet it. In this relationship, even if somebody else isn't listening to me, I can honor my voice. And so it begins to change everything. And if I don't have the tools, then I can ask, okay, I don't have conscious relationship tools. Let me go get those tools. Because I don't know how to express this. I don't know how to say no without guilt or shame. Okay. Then the embodiment comes with, how do I take the next step? I might need to ask for help. I might need to practice a new way. I might need to learn. I might need self care, might need more healing so that we begin to take that integration. How does that begin to change how I walk, how I talk, and what I say yes and no to it brings it down into the root chakra. How do I show up in this life? And we can have all these wonderful epiphanies, whether it's from a plant medicine ceremony, a meditation, a workshop, a healing session, or a breath work. We can have these wonderful epiphanies which are way up here in the ethers. Way up here. And if we're not bringing them in, then they just, like clouds, just dissipate and don't ground. That's why we go back 111 times, to get the same truth.

Yeah.

And the message is the same. But it's like, is there readiness to breathe it in, give it space, and start changing the way you walk?

And it's all perfect in timing, even if it doesn't look or feel like it's perfect. Because even if somebody goes back for the 111 ceremony and they're not ready, they're still being reminded they're not ready.

Exactly.

Well, I mean, there's no. There's no shame in that. But it's like, maybe you could take a path that's more intelligent or not.

Because the first time I got drunk and threw up, I didn't stop drinking. You know, so sometimes it's like, no, I'm going to do that way more than 111 times.

Yeah. Yeah.

And so no judgment about how long it takes, because it takes as long as it takes. Just like, you know, when you stepped away from certain things or certain addictions, it was like, okay, I'm ready now.

Yes.

And like, I took me a certain amount of pain and a certain level of emotional maturity and readiness to say, okay, I think alcohol for me is a toxin and I'm deaf. It's not supporting my best self. I don't make great decisions because the ones that I remember. Or that that's honest for sure. Like, okay, I, I, I, I want a better version of myself, myself showing up right now. And I wasn't ready to take that accountability. And that desire begins to help you let go of the old thing. And that's where I really respect the, the process that it takes as long as it takes. Because when there's the desire to birth a new version of you or a new dream or like you, hey, I really am called to be a father. And that means I'm going to be letting go of some things that are absolutely 100% weeds in the garden that are in the way of that. And then you've been, and you've been weeding that these last many years in the most beautiful ways. And then, then there's the journey of seeding it. What do, what support do you need as a father? What support do you need to manifest your dreams? What support and people and environment and lifestyle habits and tools and practices do you need to support who you are becoming? Because that support nothing about your past. It's all about, okay, how do I support the best version of me showing up? Yeah, and what does that look like?

And sometimes we actually, like, it might be easy. Where in creating Shine, you were like, okay, I'm just gonna trust, like, spirit is telling me to trust. Sometimes you can reach a cul de sac of trust, and still the results don't show up. And it's like, okay, Spirit, like, I'm waiting here. Like, where's my stuff? So when I got to Austin, it was a year search for the kind of scaffolding that I needed as a father. It was a year search, and finally at the end of it, I was like, oh, God is just telling me to create my own men's group. And that's what I did. So now there's like eight, nine of us that meet a couple times a month. And that's the scaffolding that I created because I needed it. Like, not from a place of scarcity. And this is the difference. Like, it wasn't because it's like, oh, I need a men's group. Oh my God, what am I going to do without a men's group? It was more like, all right, the father in me knows that he needs to be nourished in a specific way. And so I'm going to go actually be resourceful and get the kind of support that I need because I just deserve it, because I love myself enough to get that support. The come from is different, right? It has A different residue with that come from. So talk about that a little bit like the come from and gathering the resources that we need. That's what the universe is listening to.

Yeah, 100%. And I love that you said that. This is what I need. Because now this new seed that you planted, conscious father, conscious parent, conscious partner, that's a new seed. The new seed of who you're becoming. The soil needs different things than what the previous version of you needed. Then that might have the party person. These kinds of guys, this kind of lifestyle fit you and that's what worked for that version of you. The soil. Soil needs amending. Every seed needs a certain amount of nourishment. It needs water, it needs a certain kind of soil. It needs minerals in the soil and also protection around it. So there's where the little gate comes in, discerning, hey, these things are weeds that will sabotage this growth. So there's also. This is all divine masculine. Now let me protect this. So there comes the little gate that says these addictions, these beliefs, this kind of community does not support this or this kind of lifestyle does not support this. Let me put, as I have weeded it out, let me put a little gate there of discernment and boundary because I want this to thrive and I need to protect it. So part of me is my mindset and mental toxicity, other people's judgments, other people's beliefs, other people's dramatic doesn't belong in my mental real estate. I did. So I've got to protect that. So I have clear boundaries for sure with people or experiences or media that would undermine that. So this is now the divine masculine that comes in that says, I respect this seed and it's my responsibility to protect this garden and it's what's in it because it's me. It's me. Finally, I'm consciously parenting.

I.

And let me provide for that seed, the minerals it needs a men's group. It needs this kind of diet. It needs this much sleep. And that is coming from a place of truth. It's also coming from a place of feminine intuition and nurturing and prioritizing self care without guilt or shame that says I need this from a place of truth, not the inner child throwing a tantrum. This is I. I'm listening to the seed and this is what it needs and the courage and the tenacity. Like you said, it took a year of like I need to build this because if this tree is really going to grow, then I need to be nourished too.

Yeah.

Otherwise you plant the seed, and if it's not nourished, then bitter daddy is who's parenting, you know, or sleep deprived.

Angry, hungry, lonely, tired Daddy.

Yeah, that doesn't feel supported.

And then that becomes the reality of the seed or the child. That. That life is that way. Life is a place where we need to be on edge or hyper vigilant. That's. That's actually a story that has been unraveling a lot since becoming a parent. And as you know, you have two kids, like, well, they're graduating from college now. But when. When we bring life into the world, the life that's inside of us, that's out of alignment. It is forced to be aligned. And. And I think the ways in which that happens sometimes can be very confronting. Like, total truth for me. The hyper vigilance and the reactivity of raising my voice at Nova, raising my voice at Carrie. Like, I'm really looking at how that was imprinted from my father. And it's not to shame my father, because I'm sure that he learned it from his father. It's just truly emotional epigenetics unfolding in the most dynamic way right in front of me. And sometimes I become, like, almost entrenched in that moment to the point where it's only in reflection and in conscious reflection on a continuous basis that I actually learn from it. It's that. It's that continuous kind of emotional inventory on a hot tub that allows me to sit here with you now and be like, okay, I'm definitely better than I was three months ago. Definitely better. But there's this process of checking in, which I love our freaking analogies on this podcast, the garden, the weeding. There is a process of checking in. And I wonder, especially when we look at what happens when we're on the phone with the third eye and looking at the direction of our lives. Like, how does that get clouded? Because I think this is something. We don't have to go deep into the darkness here, but there is something to be said about how that third eye gets blocked from media, from. From the ability to choose from, from the awareness of, like, okay, I'm here in my life. Last year I was here. Let me take some solace and some gratitude for how far I've come. How do you see this? And this is like, I don't know if you've ever been asked this question, how does society and our phones and social media, how does that kind of block. Not kind of. How does that block our third eye specifically? What do you think of that.

So one of the things I think when our eyes, our human eyes are open and receiving stimulus all the time, that in itself is blocking the pituitary and the pineal gland because we're not using those gateways for what they're meant for. And that's where we see the Buddha sitting with their eyes closed, their human eyes closed so that the inner eye can open. So the third eye, if the human eyes are always open, then third eye never gets a chance to bring in information. We don't get to see through that perspective. And so when, you know, during breathwork, same thing, people are opening their eyes. I'm like, well, then you are processing your external reality through what you can see, rather than closing your eyes and seeing what's inside. Oh, I see this chamber of my heart that's got cobwebs around it because I closed that off because of this pain, or here's this rage, or here's this truth, or here's this vision. And so when we don't use our third eye, when we don't connect with our crown, it's kind of like not using a muscle. It begins to atrophy. And then we're only receiving the data from our human eyes, which is like looking through the lens of truth through a straw and thinking that's all there is. Or social media or Netflix or whatever it is, the news, the screen that this is truth, this is reality. And if we don't have the bliss upline to put away the screen that is is funneling what agenda I should be prioritizing. If we don't have the discipline to say, I need to put this aside, turn it off so that I can actually look at and perceive the soul screen, the divine consciousness, the sixth chakra around perspective and seeing the bigger picture. Because when we close the human eyes that looks through a straw, now the 1 3rd eye can see, oh, I see why this person's showing up this way. I can see why this isn't working my business. I can see why I was angry in that moment with Nova because I'm exhausted or my inner child hasn't played for a while. I can see things that my human eyes and my human brain, when my eyes are open, we're accessing the human data bank, which is mostly outdated files, mostly corrupt and given to us by somebody else. So I'm processing through very small, limited, corrupt field of data that is then skewed by social media, right? And so it's the awareness that I want to keep opening that database with Truth with bigger perspective. Because I know this is limited. I know this is limited. So that's a daily practice of closing eyes. That's the daily practice of. Yeah, like connecting the crown to hey, spirit, truth, soul, higher self, ancestors, whatever you can access in the 5D. That is not so much the three dimensional reality. Hey, help a sister out here, help a brother out here. What do you want me to see? What do you want me to know? Show me what I'm not seeing here. Give me advice. Let me have access to something my human mind just cannot get around. And so that's the practice of daily meditation, daily inquiry with our eyes closed.

It's so good. I have to close my human eyes to really cultivate an awareness of my third eye. Yeah, I mean that is like take that and put it in your spiritual bank for life. Because that will constantly pay dividends. I think the reason why people have challenges with meditation and I always tell people too, just based on my own experience. Taking a class with you with the shamangelic healing breathwork, like if you are not a meditator, start with breathing, start with breath. Work like that can be an access point to closing your eyes, feeling your body. And then whatever spirit is trying to give you, whatever the creator is trying to work through you, it cannot come in. If your eyes are wide open and you're only living here in the 3D. It's just like literally, it's not possible. But there is something to be said from this. Like, social media isn't all bad. It allows people to see and experience us right now.

Connect.

Somebody's on YouTube right now watching.

There's a place for connection.

There's a place.

There's a place for connection. And it's a slippery slope where it's very easy because of the way social media and screens are designed for it to be a crutch, for it to be addictive. And I by accident, by accident left my phone at the bank the other day. And so I was without it for 24 hours and it was like, wow, this feels really good. My nervous system, I'm like. And I watched how often I pick it up for connection or my business communicates with me. My staff communicates through this, my family communicates through this. But so does that desire to pick up for connection. And I was like, wow. I witnessing how it's unhealthy. And that will have to have back to solar plexus around integrity and discernment with where we give our power and attention to and say and to block times Away from it so it doesn't have power over us. Because I was like, okay, I can see this having power over me.

Oh, yeah.

In a little unhealthy ways. And so many of my dear soul tribe are saying the same thing of like, okay, I need to get off course. I need to get off this, you know, app for a while. I need to have a little, you know, media break. I need a phone break just to reset the nervous system and also to just get quiet.

It's so wild. The pen, the pendulum of our lives has swung so hard to like technology being the thing that we all use on a daily basis for work, for connection, to. To make a living. Right. To live our purpose. But then I feel like people like you and me and I know Mark, you just hung out with Mark.

Groves. Groves, yeah. Dear friend.

And, and, and his about to have a baby.

He's about to have a baby. He's gonna beat you in March.

So what I'm saying here is like all these in person events and bringing people together where you can hug, you can play, you can shut off the trappings of the 3D world and the conscious mind, you can really close your eyes and get into the third eye and the unconscious mind. That's actually what is gonna be the true wealth, I think, as we move Forward the next 10 years is who are the people that are super skilled and have the gravitas to lead in person events. That's actually going to be where all the wealth is. Yeah. There's going to be marketers and there's going to be AI. There's going to be all this huge arena where people make money with technology only. But I think a craving in everyone's soul is like, how do I get back to people? How do I get back to this?

Yeah.

Which is like this long form conversation where we can spend time with each other. And the podcast touches on that. It touches on that part of our beingness that, that we're all thirsty for. We're like parched in the freaking desert of information. But the wisdom we're all craving is only coming from this.

It's a connection and frequency. It's a frequency that's transmitted between two people or more. That is. And this is where you and I also kind of step back from different things that keep us from being sedated or that are numbing or dulling down our essence. Because now it's being transmitted between you and I is like connection and presence. And it's like, oh, that nourishes a part of me that can be in a crowded room and have not connect, you know, not. Not be connected.

Yeah.

And deep presence with that is just. It's so nourishing for the soul. And I realize that's one of the reasons why I chose to like, leave alcohol at the table, because I was craving connection, not through alcohol that created a fake. Like, oh, we're having fun. And when I stepped back from alcohol and, and you know, I realized what do I actually have in common with this person? Is it just we were. But we're sedated and we do stupid things or we talk about things that we wouldn't talk about if we weren't drunk, but we don't remember the next day or it wouldn't have been authentic if it wasn't for the alcohol. And I just, I feel like we as souls, we deeply crave authentic connection. Not fake gossip and drama, but depth. Like, depth and to be heard, to be cared for, to be listened to, to be encouraged, to be reminded of who we are and to have relationships in our life that are quality and genuine. And that's why I love coming here to Austin because I have so many of those in my soul tribe right here. I feel deeply seen, heard, felt acknowledged. And I also reciprocate that. And it's. It's really deeply nourishing. And we're craving that. And that's the kind of thing that I know that when I'm as. I'm growing as a soul and stepping into a new set of wings that were bigger than before, like, I'm knowing that, that my tribe relationships, those, that those soul connections where it's deeply nourishment, nourishing are what I need.

Yeah. One of the brightest moments, one of the most shine worthy moments in our podcast today was when we talked about the father or the mother shepherding that seed. And I feel like, you know, the best thing I could leave people with is and then we'll give people a chance to connect with you and go to Sedona and actually hang out and get the healing they deserve. I feel like this metaphor is so special and I just want to carry it for my whole week and I want everybody to do the same. If you've planted a seed of a dream or of a purpose, or maybe it's being the best father, the best mother, just the best human you can be. Take loving ownership to protect that seed. Right? Like it's okay to protect the seed. And honestly, alcohol, if you look at like the rock and other movie stars, they're all selling their own tequilas now. And there's this essence of darkness that I feel with that. It's not necessarily quote wrong. I'm not judging people that drink. But I will say that anything that you need to feel peaceful or to feel connected on a continuous basis, that's outside of yourself, you're letting that in to the seed. You're actually opening your arms and you're allowing that dark energy to come and infiltrate that seed of consciousness. So I think for me that's a huge lesson for all of us, that's a big lesson. Like what are we letting into the garden that's unknowingly, unconsciously, or sometimes consciously poisoning the seed or dampening the growth potential of that seed of consciousness? And can you freaking imagine, can you imagine if all of us just took like 30 days, like a month challenge to just be like, what am I letting into my garden and what am I here to protect?

And that's, that's, that's taking accountability for garden because for some people, hey, alcohol may be a toxin and for other people it's not that big a deal. It might be gluten, it might be this toxic friend, it might be this fear, it might be this lifestyle of wake and bake, it might be the lifestyle of at Netflix till 2 in the morning. And it's different and it changes. And that's just the practice of self inventory. That's where a journal of self reflection is really valuable and scheduling times where you check in with self, whether it's every Sunday, whether it's, you know, Wednesday mornings, whatever it is, it's just how am I doing and what's working and what's not working? Because the answer will change over time. What used to work will have diminishing returns sometimes or what used to work will not fit any longer.

Sure. And new person, new tools needed.

Yeah. My quality of friends, my daily practices are going through a complete upheaval again, which has happened multiple times. Every time I go through life transformation, it's up my like what's in my cupboards change, my who's in my phone changes. My daily practices change. And, and that self check in is just so vital that as an adult we can just take self inquiry and that we're not waiting for a retreat to do that. We start on the personal development journey, prioritizing how am I doing? Let me look back and celebrate the wins from this week, you know, whatever they were and like learn how to be that cheerleader for myself. And also look at where did I Self sabotage. Not from a place of bully or the inner critic, but from adult accountability. Hey, where did I not show up for some for myself? Where did I not prioritize self care? Where did I self abandon? Where, where was I short like, where did anger get the best of me today? And where did I make a mess of something? Is there a lesson from, from something that happened this week that I haven't fully integrated? And I'm just, if I don't take that inventory, I'm going to take it into the next week and there it goes, infiltrated and it didn't get resolved. And there's this little weed that sneaks in there and we learn by doing and we learn by not doing. And so.

Or you can just weed, you can just pull that little weed out with love.

Yeah, it's like, okay. And then if it snaps back in there, it's like, okay, how, yeah, how did it sneak back in there? Oh, look at that. I weeded it and then I fed it again. Okay, what can I do differently? Where do I need help? Maybe I need a tool or an accountability buddy or some support or some, like, some, some way that I can honor that. Or look at what do I need to weed from my life that's feeding the weed, you know, and what do I need to add into my life that's feeding the seeds? And it's. I, I think that I love the analogy of the garden. And this is literally the wings are this. Okay, what are the shackles? If we're talking about shine and stepping into your radiance, what are the shackles that are keeping you from flying? Doubt, fear, pain, trauma, limited beliefs. What are keeping you from radiating and levitating? Where's the heaviness? Where's the like, where's, where's the doubts and the pain? That's one thing. And then the feminine wing, where can there be trusting the intuition which we talked about today? Where can I be nurturing and kind and compassionate, creative, resourceful in faith? Those are all different chakras that we talked about. And where can I be in the masculine, courageous, protective, discerning, resilient and the provider? Where can I be courageous in like facing my fears and stepping into that warrior self, but in a way that isn't self destructive? And those become the wings. And it's like, okay, now when they are talking together and listening to each other and working together, now we're talking about real empowerment and real freedom and evolution is like, oh, how can I do this for myself? And that just is that's why that, that 14 foot golden wing mural is there at Shine, so I can look at it every day because it's like, okay, what do I need to work on?

Remind yourself. Are the wings talking to each other?

Oh, gosh. And am I shackling? Is there a fear that's keeping me? Is my masculine just forcing and pushing the toxic masculine just forcing and pushing and getting a little aggravated, and then am I going in circles creating chaos because I'm not balanced? Yeah, right. And so it just becomes a roadmap where, whether it's core healing that's happening or a tool or step into your soul mission. And that's why I love the different programs and the different services that we're offering. Meet people wherever they are on the journey. And. And it's just, it's so much fun. And I'm right in there. I'm like, I'm right in there going through the process too. I'm not walking on water, for sure. Like, every day I'm humbled to keep refining and learning, and someday I crush it. And the other days I'm like, yeah, that was a clusterfuck.

Well, this has been.

Let's try it again.

This has been so just synchronistically cool that we happened to come together on your trip to Austin. And like, what a, for me, meaningful trip in a time machine four years back. What a meaningful trip we took today. And I wonder, like, I asked you this question in your living room four years ago, this question of wellness. And it's definitely morphed for me, you know, because now in the Breathe program and everything that we teach, it's like, okay, am I nourishing myself mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually and financially?

Yeah, for sure.

You know, I used to teach from a Pentagon or from a. I used to teach from a square, but now I teach from a Pentagon. Because I really didn't honor finance before, like, the essence of money and the energy of money. So in the center of that Pentagon is us. It's like, are we nourishing all those aspects of ourselves? So think back to four years ago in your living room, just for fun. And then flash forward to now, like, what a beautiful journey you had. What a meaningful, painful, amazingly rewarding journey maybe we've all had. What have you learned the most that allows you now to live your life well? What is wellness for you now? What have you learned in the past four years that really is the essence of wellness?

I think I'm in the midst of flipping it and refining it. There's A whole nother level that I'm still practicing of prioritizing self care. And in order for shine. To shine. In order for me to shine, that has become a center point for me. And I'm really practicing leaning into that. I'm rebuilding it because it's, it's been a tenant that's been there and it has to be at the next level. It has to be at the next, next level. So I'm unpacking and weeding the things that are in the way of that at this next level. And so I'd say self care and, and daily practices and like morning routines. I'm, I'm rebuilding that foundation again for wellness so that everything else can stack on top of that. And so I'm in the process of rebuilding that. And I think it's valuable to know that at any stage of your life, you can start over and rebuild. At any stage in your life you can flip values and say, you know what, this is more important right now. And like you just added in at a, at a certain state in your 40s around the financial piece and it's like, oh, I can add that in now. And that's the root chakra around. Oh, I need to actually have financial security and financial abundance that sits in the root chakra so that I can provide safety and groundedness for my family. That is a need I have. And so that wasn't necessarily. You flipped it. And you're in the process of really building a strong foundation there. And at any time along your journey you can add in something that's been missing and it might be awkward at first and it might be slow going and that's reaching out and staying with it and, and falling and getting back up again and just continuing the process of building it in a way until it gets to that place where it's like, yeah, this feels good. Then it's like, oh, now I forgot this thing over here, I gotta go take care of that. And it's okay for it to be a journey journey and not feel like you have to have your all together all the time.

What a wild ride this is, isn't it?

You have come so far, honey, since I, since just years. Just like how you've shown up and just like, it's just so beautiful how you parent, how you are like ready to expand the family and how you've shown up as a leader in the community during challenging times and how you've shown up for yourself and asked for what you needed and let go of things that weren't in the way and had the tough conversations and you're so willing to look at your part and where you can grow. I just have deep respect for you as a leader in this community and thank you for stewarding this next generation of conscious leaders so that at least they're more prepared than we were to navigate this journey called life.

Oh, thank you for coming on the podcast. Wow, what a special one. This is one for the book. So Obviously it's@shinesedona.com is the shinesedona.com this is where people start, right? Yeah, they go right there.

We have so many tools there. The empowerment and awakening weekend that you came to what, four or five years ago?

Four years ago, yeah.

That we're having that it happen in May. That's often at least, you know, three and a half days of just the tools.

What are the dates in May?

May. I think it's like 17th or something like that.

Okay, so y' all have like three weeks after you're seeing this, hearing this to go if you feel inspired.

But if you go to Shine Sedona and you go onto the calendar, there's all kinds of upcoming events where either Shine is sponsoring or somebody else is renting the space for a wellness retreat or training. And you know, I out for those that are called to the healing offer to the healing arts. I offer my training there, my shamalic training to really uplevel, you know, healers and, and light workers. There's private sessions there if you're needing one on one work. Because when I was going through my dark night, it was, yes, a lot of group experiences and also retooling like those so that I had the tools. But it was also one on one work so that I could process my individual, you know, experience. So all of that is there, plus a really cool boutique. And so you can go and follow @shinesedona. That's our socials or follow me Anahata Ananda. And I'm so excited for people to have the experience of Shine. And we're doing a lot of virtual events and virtual sessions so that people can get the support if they can't make it to Sedona. That's something that Covid taught me is like, well, be sure to have a virtual community so that globally people can access an online support system. So we're having more virtual events and more virtual sessions.

Thank you. Thank you for all you're doing. It's a lot. And I loved your honesty today about balancing the masculine feminine of knowing when you need the nourishment and the care and like, God, that's just the most trustable thing. When somebody that's doing big shit in the world is actually talking about the stuff that they're still working on. That's what we all need, y'. All. So from my heart to yours. Thank you, Anahata. Which, by the way, y' all need to know this. That's the heart chakra. That is Anahata.

That is. We want to do a free gift for your audience.

Let's do the free gift.

So in the show notes, I'll give you a guided visualization for chakra, like a chakra balancing, you know, super easy 15 minutes so that you can just close your eyes, whether it's before bedtime in the middle of the day or first thing in the morning, to just. Just close your eyes and just take a walk through the issues and the energy of each energy center with some affirmation, with some gentle breathing, so that you can kind of come into that internal alignment before you start your day or at the end of your day. So we will get you a free gift, a little visualization for you.

Thank you. Okay. It is right below wherever you're watching or listening to this podcast. And truly, from my heart to yours. What a gift this was today. What a cool. I mean, anytime we get together, it's great, but, like, there was something really special about the return of energy after so many years. So thank you for being here. And from my heart, from Anahata's heart to yours. Until we see you again, we're both wishing you love and wellness. We'll see you soon. Hey, thanks for watching this video. If you love this video, hit subscribe. That way you'll be automatically notified when new videos come out, new episodes, and also share this video with a friend. If you loved it, they're going to love it too. Check out some of the videos on this screen that are perfectly curated based on the video you just saw. Make sure you follow me and I'll see you in the next video.