How to Navigate Life's Changes + Challenges | Josh Trent (Mark Groves LIVE)

There's some awesome energy in here. Y' all feel it? So my name is Josh Trent. I got the pleasure and privilege of Mark asking me to open up this event. Answering the call. And thank you all for answering the call. It's really courageous that you're here. You know, I have nothing planned. I have no idea what I'm going to say, which is the most authentic. And I'm blessed to have my lady here. Kerri, Michelle, and gosh, can y' all relate to relationships being the biggest crucible for your own growth? Like, raise your hand if you're in relationship. Okay, okay. And if you're not, then. Then it's coming, right? You know, the relationship that. That I have with Carrie, and we have two children, it's so potent and so powerful, but you don't have to be a parent to feel that potency. And I think this. This concept of parenting yourself, really, what we all want here is we all want to be liberated. We all want to be free. Who doesn't want to feel free in their body? Who doesn't want to feel free in their relationships? Like, this liberation that we're all seeking, it is right there for us, yet at times, it feels so fucking fleeting. You feel me? It's like you want to be a certain way, you want to show up in a certain way, yet it's so hard to do. Why is that? Why is it so hard to be the person that we're destined to be? And this is what I talk about on my podcast all the time. Wellness and wisdom. I'm like, okay, how do I live my life? Well, ever since I was a little boy. Can you all relate to this? Ever since you're a child, you're like, there's something off with the way adults treat each other. Like, they're. They're arguing about money and they're projecting on each other. Well, maybe when you're a kid, you don't know what projection is, but there's just this existential tension that you can't put your finger on, but yet you can feel. And I've been asking myself that question ever since I was a little boy. Like, how do I live my life? Well. And the more that I ask myself this question of wellness or liberation, the more I touch the pulse of, like, well, if I'm liberated, I'm only as liberated as my darkest secrets. Whatever I'm keeping from myself, whatever I'm keeping from my woman, whatever I'm keeping from my children, my business, like, this is the stuff that holds us Fucking hostage. So someone here in the audience, there's maybe more than someone. There is a question inside of you. How do I get the relationship I want? How do I have the nervous system regulation that I want? And yet it's really not about what you have in this current moment. It's about all this shit that has been impregnated and told to us by our parents. God bless them, right? They did the best they could. But really what I'm saying is, like, there is this question that I think we all want the answer to. And it's like, how do I be free? How do I live free? How do I feel free in my body? How do I feel free to love a man or a woman or however you relate? Like, how do I be free? And so this concept of freedom, I think, is really fascinating. And I teach through this Pentagon. And if anybody, I don't know if has anybody ever listened to one episode of Wellness and Wisdom? Okay, Carrie has. There's a couple more people there. Okay, great. So I want you all to just visualize a lens in which you see your life. And the lens could be any shape, but the lens that I love is this lens of the Pentagon. At the bottom of our. Of our Pentagon is the physical self. If we're physically well, then we're not going to suffer physically, which gives us more chi, more energy for the other parts of our Pentagon. And the walls of the Pentagon are the mental and the emotional. The roof of the house is the spiritual and the financial. So this mental, physical, spiritual, financial, these are the parts of us that really allow us to thrive and to be liberated. Yet can anybody relate to when your finances are fucked, your mind is racing, when your body is dealing with detoxification, then there's a part of your health, your emotional well being, that's suffering. And so what I'm saying is, like, everything feeds into everything else. And so today, my intention with just being authentic and having no plan to chat with y' all is that, gosh, we really are all connected. Like, feel the energy of the person next to you. Maybe you came here with a friend, maybe you're here by yourself, but there's some part of you, there's one of these five sides of you that wants to feel more liberated. It wants to feel more free. And I get that we all learn from different teachers and masters, but I want to go back to this concept of we're only as liberated as our darkest secrets. So they're inside of all of us. There's things that we don't share. And the crazy paradox is that the stuff you don't share actually holds you hostage. So the greatest way you can become liberated at this event is when Mark is giving you a prompt or when you're feeling like it's time for you to share. Like, have the courage. Have the courage to share. Because there's something in you that's a secret that actually encapsulates and holds the fucking healing that you deserve. So maybe there's somebody in the audience. Not to put you on the spot, but I would love to put you on the spot because you answered the call. Is there someone here that is working on a breakup or a transition in relationship of any kind? And if you don't want to raise your hand, you don't have to. If you want to raise your hand, it's a pretty safe space. Do you all feel safe? Okay, so you're working. Okay, so any kind. Any kind. Right. And there's a couple more people. So what's really powerful is when we go through these crazy transitions, it's actually to not fall into this shame spiral of, oh, my God, why is this happening to me? Oh, my God, why is. Why am I experiencing all this craziness? I think what's most powerful is that we actually just be kind to ourselves. Now. How do you do that? How do you be kind to yourself? It's a learned behavior. So if you didn't see your parents being kind to each other or kind to themselves, it can be really challenging to be kind to yourself. Has anybody ever had a thought and that thought said something like, God, you're stupid. Oh, my God, you look ugly. Oh, my God, I can't believe you did this. Right? These thoughts that we all experience, they're literally just thoughts. And so my intention with sharing this is like, gosh, I have this deep hope in my heart that today we can just watch these thoughts and not attach to these thoughts, because so many of these thoughts, they are literally just leaves on a driveway to be an analogy. And I've had many times in my life, especially in relationship, which is why I'm so glad that Kari Michelle is here today. She teaches me so much about myself that I would never know, like, being in relationship. And it could be a deep friendship, by the way. It doesn't have to be an intimate relationship. Being in relationship is the biggest fucking crucible for you to see all of your shit that never would be exposed if you weren't in relationship. And so what do you do with all this stuff that comes up where do you put it? How do you let it flow through you? Like, these are all the tactical, practical nervous system tools. One of my friends is here, and she teaches breathwork. And I believe that Mark will lead us through breath work. And I've had almost a thousand students in my breathe program. So, yes, breath is great. But then what do you do when stuff bubbles up? How do you know how to ask for the support that you deserve? How do you even have the courage to ask for that support? And I think the way that we actually ask for support and the way that we have courage is actually by not listening to the fucking demon that's in our mind so much. This demon that says, you shouldn't do that. You should be in shame. Who are you to have this? Who are you to speak on a stage? Why should people listen to you? Right? These thoughts were in my mind last night. And I think that really, to be a leader, it's not about shining a light. Like, I'm not up here to shine a light on y'. All. I'm up here to hold a lantern. Because when I hold a lantern up, I shine light on my stuff, too, and I shine light on everyone else. I don't fall into this trap of being a leader who's stuck in kind of a spiritual narcissism of just shining light on other people. Like, when I remember, I was a trainer, are there any fitness pros or massage therapists or chiropractors? Okay, so one thing that when I started my journey of personal training for 10 years, I had a pretty significant sex addiction, porn addiction. And I was hiding that by shining light on everyone else. And so as I was holding this flashlight, I thought, wow, look at my ego. Loved it. My ego was like, great. You can just shine light on all these people. But the stuff that was dark, it was the space between my hand and the flashlight that I was shining. And so I think of this concept of, like, what does a leader really do? How do you lead yourself? How do you lead your family? How do you lead your business? You do it by shining light on yourself at the same time that you shine light on other people. And that can be really confronting. It can be really, really challenging. So, you know, to answer the call this. This beautiful event, what is the call that you felt that even brought you here? What? Everybody's got a dream. Everybody's got something they're working through. Gosh. The greatest service you could give yourself at this event is to just go deep into it. Just go into it in the same way that you might do a cold plunge or run a marathon, like, just. Just fucking lean into it. And I think the only way out is through. Because it's not just the platitude that we hear all the time. It's that we're all figuring out how to have the courage to gather the wisdom to actually move through it. And it can be really challenging. Right? So maybe there's somebody here right now, and they're already feeling a little shaky or a little nervous about sharing. And that's totally cool because your body is speaking to you just like my body was speaking to me. I was upstairs with Mark, and he did a great meditation, and the meditation was about just letting whatever love wants to share come through. How can I be up here with y'? All? And how can you be here for each other and be open to Mark and just be open to this call where it's not about serving your ego. It's not about looking cool. It's not about being a part of something that can feed you, a part of yourself that's in darkness. It's about what actually brought you here in the first place. What is the call that you answered that you're actually willing to have the courage to develop, to move through. So let's see what else needs to be said. Let's all take a deep breath together. And full truth. This is the first time I've ever spoke for Mark or an event like this. So I'm actually just going with the flow. And one thing in the flow of my body that I'm feeling is going back to this relationship with Carrie. You know, it's been a roller coaster, an absolute roller coaster, because here I am, a man who's leading this mission of wellness and Wisdom and almost 700 podcast episodes, and I still get fucking triggered. Like, deeply, deeply triggered to where I'll project onto her. I'll be the same way my dad was to me with my children. And it's like going back to this ultimate question of, like, oh, well, my mess is my message. The very wound that I have, the wounding that I have from my father, from my mother, these are actually beautiful gifts. And this is the craziest part, like the gift of the wound. I remember on the podcast, John Wineland was talking about this. He lost his daughter to sickle cell anemia. And I thought, like, wow, how do you get over that? How do you get over the loss of a daughter? I think she was even in her 20s, and he just took a breath, and I believe he even wiped his tear, it was really a cool moment. Like it was raining outside, it was thundery. It was like perfect podcast weather. And he said, he looked up at me and he said, well, the wound is where you serve from. The wound is where you serve from. And so one thing in my life that I've been reminded of so much is like, well, how do I not let my wound cloud my wisdom? Because if I'm so hurt and I'm so in my wound and I identify so much with my wound, then I can't ever really be of service. I can't ever really be a guide or a help to someone else. And so that's something like, as a father, as a soon to be husband, as a man who's really leading his life on purpose. It's like, how do we do this all? And how do we answer these very unique yet challenging questions? I think we just learn to be authentically ourselves and to shed all this stuff and this programming and this BS that we got from mom and dad and God bless them, right? They did amazing. And our grandparents weren't perfect. You know, my mom. My mom, when I grew up, she had manic bipolar and she still does. And if anybody's ever dealt with a bipolar mother or a bipolar family member, it's really hard because you never know where safety is. You never know where you actually can feel grounded and safe. And that's just one example. Some other things that we get from our parents is like, money doesn't grow on trees. Rich people are bad. Oh, we're the Smiths. We do this. Oh, well, you're prone to type 2 diabetes. Like all of these bullshit. I laugh. I mean, it is laughable, but it's also really sad. All of these bullshit stories that we believe that we carry on and carry on and carry on in the words of Carl Jung, until you make the unconscious conscious. It'll rule your life. It'll rule your life and you'll call it fate. So you're all here to change the fate, which is so exciting, so beautiful. And I'm just really grateful that y' all are even more listening to me, like, how grateful I am that I can be here and share just a little bit of my life, a little bit of my stuff, a little bit about how I'm still not perfect with my woman, how I'm still not perfect with my children, because then I can do the most beautiful thing. I can cut the cord of this shame dragon that lives in the cave. It's like anybody that follows Joseph Campbell, he says, you know, the cave you fear to enter holds the treasure that you seek. And so there's some fucking treasure here. Like, I can. I can feel it. This is a very special, intimate. I almost feel like you guys feel like you're in a living room, like somebody's living room or something. There's so much treasure here because Mark has created such an intimate, beautiful space. And so as you go through the practices today, and as you feel whatever it is that you're destined to feel, just go for it. I mean, we live so such a finite little time in this world. That's my hope, my prayer for all of us. So thank you for hearing me out. If you're on this journey of understanding who you are, you're in the perfect freaking place. So thanks, y', all for being here. Let's bring on Mark. Here we go. Mark grohs, everybody. Right when I pee. It's always how it works. Welcome. Thank you, Josh, so much. Appreciate you coming up.