I Promise These 4 Steps Will Delete Your Self-Sabotage Forever

If you've ever said, I know what to do, I just don't do it. This loop is why. So most of us, including yourself, are not lazy. We're not broken, we're not unmotivated. We just get trapped in a loop that your neural system thinks is keeping you safe. A core belief is like a hook. This hook gets formed way before we're seven. If you look at the neurology of what happens to the brain hemispheres from conception to seven, little kids were essentially on drugs. And this is really beautiful because the mind is like a rose. The mind is very malleable. It's also very dangerous because whatever that child is told, whatever that child sees, and whatever that child experiences are going to shape the fabric that makes the tapestry of the entire reality of this child. How many times do you have to get your heart trampled on before you change? How many times do you have to go through divorce, breakup, overeating, addiction, all these crazy, challenging things before you finally give yourself the white flag and raise it in the air and say, you know what? I love myself enough to learn how to feel. So most of us, including yourself, are not lazy. We're not broken, we're not unmotivated. We just get trapped in a loop that your neural system thinks is keeping you safe. Most people try to change their lives at the level of action or discipline or habits or performance. But the real loop that I'm going to share with you today has the power to change your life forever. I know that sounds like I'm being very straightforward and very reductionistic, but here's the real truth. I have lived. What we're going to talk about today. Today we're going to talk about the BTFA loop. It's on the screen right now. Belief, thought, feeling and action. This is exactly the way that I've learned how to change my behaviors from the inside out, instead of always relying on these external frameworks for change. I know you feel this. There's a part of you, whether it's the mental, physical, emotional, spiritual, or financial nourishment of self, the Pentagon that you see on the screen right now. All of these deserve the most beautiful way for you to nourish them through the earned life experience and wisdom so they actually get fed. You're going to go to nourish these five sides of yourself, and here's what's going to happen. Your beliefs are going to pop up which inform your thoughts, your feelings, and inherently your actions, AKA behaviors. But like I just said, most people try to change their lives only at the level of action, with their discipline, their habits, their performance, but the real loop for behavior change and the identity transformation that you so deserve. So whenever you're watching this, it's perfect timing because all things start with belief. And what if I told you that belief was rooted in either survival or trauma and no amount of willpower can override it? This is why I believe that the BTFA loop explains 99 plus percent of self sabotage. I say 99, but it's probably more like 100. Once you understand this, you can then interrupt it, you can rewire it, and you can live from truth instead of from trauma, AKA stuck energy or emotion. Energy in motion. This episode is going to show you the exact steps and I'm not going to hold anything back. I'm giving you a beautiful gift today from 10 plus years of my life experience. The steps that you're going to get out of this podcast today are going to identify a loop that has been running your life in the background, probably multi generationally. I'm going to show you how to break it. I'm going to show you how to identify it from the inside out. So share your insights with the tribe over@liberatedlife.com or drop a comment below as to what are you truly committed to creating this year? What is the life that you know you deserve deep down in your guts? And how can you use this framework of BTFA to shift into it? All right, let's start with the B, the belief. The belief is essentially, call it a hidden code below your choices. Everything that you do, be, do, have that's on the screen right now. We be first, we do next and we have third. Most people start with the last one to get it backwards. But look, whether it's be or do or have, everything is related to your beliefs. And so everything you do is downstream of what you believe first about yourself, about the world, and about what's possible and essentially what was conditioned for you to believe way before your dad and mom hooked up. Yes, they hooked up. Speaking of hooking up, a core belief is like a hook. This hook gets formed way before we're seven. If you look at the neurology of what happens to the brain hemispheres from conception to seven little kids, we're essentially on drugs. And this is really beautiful because the mind is like a rose. The mind is very malleable. It's also very dangerous because whatever that child is told, whatever that child sees, and whatever that child experiences are going to shape the fabric by that makes the tapestry of the entire reality of this child that eventually becomes an adult, just like you and I. Newsflash. I'm sure you know this on some level. We are a child. We have an inner child. We have a soul. We have a body. We have a mind. And we have a connection to the etheric field as well as many other ways in which we connect to our reality. But those are the core that I really want you to think about today. And I want you to feel into this issue that many of us have. And if your belief system says, I'm not safe unless I'm perfect or love has to be earned, then every decision you make is playing out that story over and over and over again. Here's how you do it. Here's how you shift a belief. Write down three repeating patterns in your life. And then ask yourself, these are three patterns that you don't want anymore, that you're ready to let go of. And then ask yourself, what would somebody have to believe to keep repeating this? When that belief activates, where do you feel it in your body? Is it throat? Is it heart? Is it solar plexus? Is it gut? Is it sacral? Is it your sex organs? Where exactly does this live? A great practice to do is to take 10 deep breaths, put both hands on your heart, be out in nature or just quiet. Turn off your phone and take 10 circular breaths. As you breathe in through your nose, your belly's gonna rise. As you breathe out through your mouth, your belly's gonna fall. And after those 10 deep breaths, just ask the question in your mind, what do I believe about myself that I keep repeating these beliefs, these stories? What exactly is it? And then find where the belief is in your body. Then do this. Talk to where it lives in your body. Now, if you've never done this before, it might feel a little weird, and that's okay. A lot of this deeper inner work is weird, and a lot of this deeper work feels counterintuitive. But as many great masters have taught us for millennia, all change when first received feels counterintuitive. So touch your body, close your eyes, and feel in yourself, where does this belief live? And then say this, this belief kept me safe for my whole life. Or, this belief kept me safe up until now, but I don't need it anymore. What are you here to teach me? Belief. What are you here to teach me about the survival in which you facilitated for me up till now? And then talk to that belief and ask that belief are you willing to be let go of? Because I am the arbiter of my beliefs. You, belief are not the arbiter of me. I, the self, am the arbiter of you. Your beliefs are not facts. Many times our beliefs are old survival strategies. So do this practice. Pause this podcast wherever you are, or pause it and come back to it. This has the opportunity for you to change the entire trajectory of your life this year, whenever you're watching and we happen to be recording this right now in 2025. Your beliefs are not facts. When you start to go deeper into yourself and then when you share this in community, like what's on the screen Right now, liberatedlife.com, this is the beginning. Such a simple practice. It's such a simple practice, but we think that it has to be so complicated. So get out of your mind, get into your body. Let your unconscious mind start telling you where these harmful Bs are in your BTFA loop. Now let's talk about the T. This is our thoughts, the first domino in the loop. So we have our beliefs and. And then what starts to charge that our feeling and our action that I'll talk about is our thoughts. So think of it like this. Every action or behavior that you've ever regretted, every harmful thing you've said to your boyfriend or girlfriend or brother or sister or a friend, every time you have hurt someone else's feelings, it's because you yourself were feeling scared or sad, full stop. I know that seems very simple. I know that seems very, very easy and simple. But just because it's simple does not mean that it's going to be easy for you to integrate the capacity to choose love over fear. You don't just feel stuff randomly. You think something first. So if your belief creates the thought and then you start to feel it, which we'll talk about in the next section, let's go deeper into our thoughts. Most people live on autopilot. They react to thoughts as if these thoughts are facts. But the mind constantly recycles beliefs from childhood trauma, AKA energy in motion. That's stuck. So stuck. Emotion. Let's get rid of the word trauma. I'm just gonna slide the word trauma off the screen. We are all traumatized in some way, but yet trauma, the energy of that word trauma doesn't serve us anymore in 2025 and beyond. Instead, what we teach in emotional epigenetics and then the Life Method Identity Transformation System is I share with my students and with our entire community that all of us are burdened bioenergetically. We all have bioenergetic burdens, whether it's emotional patterns, whether it's generational beliefs or whether it's our environment. Now these three disruptions essentially to our homeostasis, they create stuck energy pockets. And our stuck energy pockets exist in our body and our body is the unconscious mind. So when these stuck energy pockets are left unchallenged, those thoughts that were created by the stuck energy connected to the belief create distorted feelings. We'll talk about feelings in the next section. So let's do a practice of thought awareness. I want you to pause the next time that you notice you're thinking something that's connected to a belief. By the way, what is the thought that just ran through my mind? Now just because you think a thought doesn't mean you get to energize that thought with emotion or with feeling. Check yourself. Is this thought rooted in fear or is it in reality? Is this a loving thought or is this a realistic thought? Use this reframe tool. Shift from I always mess this up or I feel stupid or they don't like me. All of these self deprecating thoughts that 99.999% of the time are not true. Say something like this. I'm learning to handle this differently. I'm learning to see that this person is just a teacher for the trigger that I'm experiencing Now. Look, I'm not here to disrespect what you've been through. All of us have been through unique challenges. But here's the ultimate truth. It may not be your fault, but it is your loving responsibility. If you desire the identity transformation that all of us in the liberated life tribe are working on, are putting work into self for, then you get to use this reframe tool. It's not just words. These words have the power to shift the way that you think and then dissolve these beliefs that are creating inherently the action. It's on the screen again. Btfa, your belief that creates the thought that then in the next section now we're going to talk about feeling dictates your actions. So let's get into the feeling. Most people and I did this for many years and I still catch myself at times by the way, do not have this mastered. That is one thing I want to share with you. No leader in the world, right? I lead myself, I lead my business, I lead my family. You're leading your unique aspects of life. None of us who are a leader ever have this perfectly wired. Now isn't that so beautiful? Because we don't have to be perfect about the BTFA loop then it can just be this playful, constant practice that we juggle every single moment of every single day. It takes away the pressure of this thing, of being perfect. Now, if you've noticed that you came to this podcast because you want the perfect list and you want to follow the BTFA and perfection, where does that connect to a belief that you have to be perfect in order for stuff to work? Because that's a trap. That feeling that you have that is trying to tell you that. That you're not enough, that's reinforcing the thought and the belief. I want to share with you, my friend, that feelings are literally a guidepost and a sensory mechanism to emotion or energy in motion. But if you don't move these emotions, they become stuck identity. And this is the big piece that we go over in the Liberated Life tribe and in our Life Method program. We know that we are not our beliefs, we are not our thoughts, we are not our feelings. But yet we are judged by society on our actions. And so if we're looking for the A to be different, the actions, the behaviors, the deeper work, the most simplistic work that we make so challenging when we try to just do it from the mind is feeling our feelings. Feeling our feelings is the most powerful tool in the universe, full stop. Why do you think wars happen? Why do you think murder happens? Why do you think horrendous things happen around the world? It's because no one ever taught us how to feel. Ever. No one ever taught us how to feel. Unless you were one of the lucky ones. Where your parents modeled this beautiful emotional regulation for you, especially for men and for the women out there, I'm speaking to your hearts as well. How many times do you have to get your heart trampled on before you change? How many times do you have to go through divorce, breakup, overeating, addiction, all these crazy, challenging things before you finally give yourself the white flag and raise it in the air and say, you know what? I love myself enough to learn how to feel. That's what we're talking about right here in the btfa in our f. Our feeling. Think of it like this. The feeling is a somatic signal that you're either feeling or you're avoiding. That's truly it. Now, am I a psychologist? No. Am I a PhD or an MD? No, I'm not. But those people have feelings, too. And in their scholastic endeavors, most of them never actually were taught how to feel as well. So feelings are just energy in motion, and you can start to learn how to move them. Let's Do a practice so you can start accessing your capability through feeling to feel and process and sense your emotion. Let's dive into this practice, just for 90 seconds. I want you to let one emotion arise. The best way you can do this is by putting both hands on your heart. Now I want you to breathe ten times with me. We're going to do this right here, right now. Wherever you're driving, wherever you're walking, if you're listening, if you're with me so far, trust me, allow me to do this with you. 10 deep breaths. In through your nose, out through your mouth. Keep going. Inhale through your nose. Belly rises. Exhale. Belly falls. Three more. Ah. Now pause. Hands on your heart. Let your body talk to you. Where is the emotion in your body? What is its shape? What is its color? What texture does it have? What is it here to teach you? You are not weak because you feel your emotions. You are inherently strong when you feel your emotions. They have divine, powerful messages for you. What is this emotion wanting you to learn? Close your eyes, put your hands on your heart and just ask from curiosity, God, what is it that I most get to learn and how can I be most humble to learn it? God, what is it that I most get to learn and how can I be most humble to learn it? And just allow yourself to complete this. Breathe into that space in your heart, in your body, until it softens or it shifts. It doesn't have to disappear. We know that from neurology and neuroscience, through the work of Dr. Jill Taylor, when she mapped our brain, that we actually only feel an emotion for 90 seconds. And the reason this emotion gets stuck is because we have an attachment to the feeling, thought and belief that makes it alive. You can shift right in this moment, right now, and this will be an ongoing process for you this year. But if you're feeling something, it's because something wants to be felt so that you can be more free. That's what this work is about. Know that whatever you're feeling, there's beauty, there's power, there's strength there. And your emotion is just energy asking for movement. So I want you to feel this thing fully and place it down in the comments below or post it in our tribe over@liberatedlife.com. what emotion are you feeling once you've had 10 deep breaths to center yourself and clear out this stuck energy? And what is the lesson that it's here to show you? Now let's get to the juice. The A. Think of the A as action or behavior. This is the expression of your unconscious agreement with self. Now, I say unconscious because the A leads to the F, which leads to The T, which 100% of the time in my life experience at least, and with my students and with our breathe program, and in everything that I've ever done in 10 years, everything traces back to the battle. See, action isn't where the loop starts. Psychology, and even CBT takes us to the action. Gabor Marte says, don't ask why the addiction, ask why the pain. But I would say that the pain would ask why the belief, the belief that structures this holding onto of the pain, which then creates the action of people inherently feeling not worthy and going out to beat their wife or abuse children or just do heinous things. This can all be stopped. I'm not a preacher. I'm not here to wave a white flag and shout from a mountaintop that it can be stopped, but it can be stopped every time you overwork or you self sabotage or you ghost someone, or you break your word. These ways that we stay out of integrity with self and others, it's not personal failure. It's a neural system adaptation. We try to fix our actions with our motivation. But if the belief, the trigger, the thought and the feeling haven't shifted, then in my experience, the behavior won't ever stick. So here's how you can bring this home for yourself this year or whenever, wherever you're watching this. I mean, I can. I can feel the emotion that you're feeling right now. And I'm. I'm not even in your room. I'm not even in your car. I'm not even with you. But I. But I know you're here and I know you're feeling this. What we all get to have for this BTFA loop is one thing. Pattern interrupt. I want to challenge you to replace one action that keeps you stuck with a new micro action that serves your highest self. The one of you, the version of you that lives life in a way of such peace that people can feel your power. That's how I sign off on the podcast every week. Because it's not just something that I say. It's something that I truly feel. It's something that I really believe. You cannot have peace unless you've done the work to attain it. And you cannot have power unless it comes from peace. So I want you to just replace one action this week with a new micro action that serves your highest self by working the BTFA loop. You can do it with this video. You can play this video over and over and over again to do the practice. You can also just write BTFA on a journal. We have a BTFA field guide that's part of the Self Liberation Blueprint that's linked right here on the screen and wherever you're watching or listening to this, I take people through a 10 day, 100% free by the way. A 10 day process where you can go from this lower version to have the wisdom of current version and move to a piece of the higher version of yourself. Am I gonna say that these 10 days will shift your life forever, permanently? No, I'm not. Because that would be lying. But here's what I can promise you. If you download the Self Liberation Blueprint and you join our community, you're going to receive so much gifts about how to do this pattern interrupt and you're gonna learn parts about yourself that honestly you didn't even know that you didn't know were there. A lot of us have unconscious incompetence when it comes to our beliefs. This interrupt is what is needed. This interrupt is what is so deeply, desperately needed by the part of you that's in pain. I know that you're worthy of having more peace and more power in your life. I know this because my life is living proof. I'm living this work every day to the best of my ability in my perfectly imperfect way. And I want you to join us in tribe, in community. Go through the training. Learn about yourself. I understand these aspects of yourself. You don't have to do this alone anymore, but you don't need to do more. You get to do differently and start engaging with yourself and with community in a way that this loop doesn't need to control you anymore. Because the loop doesn't change with time. The BTFA loop only changes with attention and intention. The BTFA loop is running whether you know it or not. The difference is whether it's rooted in fear or it's rooted in love. Most people try to break these loops by focusing on the symptoms or the action. But unless you work upstream at the level of belief and sensation in your somatic experience, the loop will continue to go on and on and on. And I know that you are worthy of something different. That's why I'm here in this brand new year or whenever you're watching this at the perfect time for you to take action. So take action. Please share this podcast with somebody who's been struggling in loops. If you know a friend who's been divorced and they keep showing the same fruit in their life or it's a neighbor or your mother or your father or even a grandparent. I mean, this work spans the testimony of time, when we heal ourselves and when we start to be honest about our btfa. When we have honesty, then we have clarity. And when we have clarity, then we have speed. So share this podcast and let me know your heart and your thoughts in the comments below. And make sure you download your self Liberation Blueprint training over@liberatedlife.com SLB make sure you're subscribed so you can keep getting free trainings, free gold, free nuggets until I see you on another podcast. I'm wishing you love, wellness, but most importantly, peace and power. You cannot have power unless you have peace. We'll talk with you next week.