Rewriting Your Inner Script: Break Free from Limiting Beliefs + Embrace Liberation

If science shows us that 90% of all of our thoughts are negative, that means we're only working with 10% capacity. A limiting belief is an idea or a thought that holds you back from you reaching your full potential. It's this little Geppetto, this little mental barrier that comes on your shoulder, and it says, you're too fat, Mar. You're too fat, Josh. You can't do it. You're not worth this. When you start facing fears, when you start facing judgments, you're going to meet the part of yourself that's super messy. You know, this. This part of yourself that's, like, disheveled and disorganized and doesn't know how to feel things. So when you meet resistance, this is the one thing that I want you to do from now on. What's up, everyone? It's Josh, Trent, and Mar. We are here for an AMA today. How you doing, Mar?

Oh, amazing. I just had such beautiful weekend, and even this morning, just full, felt so tired because I went to sleep late, like, every night since Friday. So I just went to jump in the cold water under the waterfall, and, oh, my God, it's just the best. Like, my nervous system is, like, renewed, and I feel like a new human being, and it just feels amazing.

Give me some of that. Look, y', all, we're here for a specific purpose today, and Mar already touched on it. It is this story that we're either reading or on someone else's page, or it's a story that we're writing for ourself. Today. We're talking about this inner script, the story that we've written and that we're reading for ourself or the one that our parents, grandparents, or society gave to us. How do we embrace liberation by breaking free from the old script? That's what today's AMA is about. So if this resonates with you, keep listening, because by the end of this podcast, this video podcast, I promise you, you will have something practical and real that you can actually use in your life to first identify the bullshit that's not serving you. Next, take action on the clear inventory that you've built for yourself. And three, what to do when you experience resistance. All right, if this sounds good, tune in, hit subscribe, and wherever you're watching this or hearing this, check in with yourself. What's a script or what's a story that I'm reading that I'm just sick of reading? Can you relate to this more? Like, what's a story that we read all the time that we're just, like, so over this story. We're going to get clear in this. And this podcast is a fundamental part of the human experience. How do I get rid of the old story and write the new one? All right, so let's begin. The story that we tell ourselves is literally everything. What if I told you that if you rewrite your inner script, then the story that's outside of you will write anew as well? Now, at first audible, you might be like, what. What I'm saying is that thoughts become things. You don't have to be Princess Mulford or Napoleon Hill to know this is real. The reality is that we're creating a script for us every single day. But the thing is, is that many of us don't even know that we're playing someone else's playbook. So get this. Did you know that 90% of all thoughts in the human mind are negative? I mean, just like. Whoa, just pause the tape right there. If science shows us that 90% of all of our thoughts are negative, that means we're only working with 10% capacity bar. Have you ever had negative thoughts? Who.

Yeah, definitely. Like, every single day. Of course.

That was a softball I just saw. Of course, because we're. Because we're human, right? And it's so fun to be human, but also it's so challenging at times. And let's dig in. I want to define, like, what is a limiting belief? It's. It's this thing in personal development that is many times misunderstood or almost unquantifiable at times, because a limiting belief is an idea or a thought that holds you back from you reaching your full potential. It's this little Geppetto, this little mental barrier that comes on your shoulder, and it says, you're too fat, Mar. You're too fat, Josh, you can't do it. This isn't. You're not worth this. And we know when we hear it that it's bullshit. But if we haven't slept, if we're stressed out, if we're not practicing healthy boundaries, then there are times when we could believe it. Like, and it's actually. It's just fundamentally not true yet, to the degree that we're taking care of our wellness Pentagon. It's on the screen right now. It's actually the shirt that I'm wearing. You can get this in our merch store, by the way, or you help design the designs for the merch store. So. Thank you. I. I think our stuff looks pretty good.

What do you think it does? Yeah. Yeah. I always wear my merch. I have my. My beanie and my T shirt, so it's perfect for the winter.

Now check it out on the store page, y'. All. So the limiting belief. If we are a hostage to this belief, it is to the degree that we're not in mastery of our wellness pentagon. I know. You know, Mar, we all know that if we're stressed out, if we're eating improper foods, if we're in a space of maybe taking too much stimulants like caffeine or any kind of een. Any kind of stimulants, that we're more susceptible to this voice, this limiting belief. Actually being believed is real. And this is the big thing. A lot of our limiting beliefs come from childhood. Actually, I would say almost all of them, either childhood or society. So, Mar, what's a. What's an experience that you had as a child? As we start to unpack, what is a limiting belief that you could share that's really paramount in the healing journey you've been on? In other words, what's the limiting belief from childhood that you got clear on and how did you work through that?

Yeah, so there have been many, especially in the past few years, that I've been uncovering and healing. But I feel like one of the biggest ones that have impacted all of my especially romantic relationships, but also how I connect to people and friendships and basically all relationships in general is that I believed that my parents didn't love me, which was a wrong belief because there's not that many parents in the world that wouldn't love their children. They would have to be very, very broken inside to not love their children and abandon them and not to care about them. So that was a wrong belief that I had because as a child, I didn't have the emotional capacity to understand the truth, the reality. And so of course, jumped into conclusion that I didn't receive love because I didn't receive it in the way that would make me feel loved. And, yeah, when you're a child, you don't understand these things. You just. You don't have the capacity yet. So I lived with that for almost 30 years. And suddenly one day, I don't know what suddenly clicked. Maybe all the healing that I was doing step by step, somehow led to discover that my parents did love me this whole time. They just didn't show it in a way that I would be able to understand it. And that changed everything. It suddenly opened the door to new way of relating to people and just me loving myself more and me being able to love my parents much more than I used to. It's so beautiful because I was telling this lie to myself my whole life and I was living based off of this lie that wasn't even true. So I think that's a really, really crucial, important belief that I had as a child and as a grown up as well.

It's so good because I know every single person listening or watching this can relate to some aspect of this phrase. And let me know if you feel this, y'. All, I don't deserve love. I'm not worthy of love. Just let that land for a second. We're in the process here today in this truly life changing 20 something minutes of your life where you can just use what Mar shared and what we're about to unpack for you in a very practical way. A starting place for healing in your life. You know, some of the biggest things come to us when we least expect them. Maybe you found this podcast because a friend gave it to you, or you found it because of the title, or you were skimming on YouTube or Spotify. Just trust that whatever stories are shared here and whatever you resonate with, in other words, whatever your somatic intelligence connects to in this conversation is real. If you have something that came up for you when I said those two phrases, trust that your story is very much unique, but also very universal. We all have wounds from childhood. It's like that phrase, there's no special snowflake, yet you are very special. Everyone comes into this world and goes through pain and trauma and challenge. I think for myself, one short story that comes up for me is I remember I was in high school and my dad was doing his thing at the time, which was typically one of two things. It was like either anger or frustration. And I remember I was. I was 17 years old and the next day we were going to go out on the football field. And the tradition at high school was that my mom and my father would run out to the middle of the field with me and then I'd give my mom a flower. And I remember my dad was so angry at her and they had so much discontent and so much of a lack of emotional regulation or emotional intelligence. At 17, I didn't realize that, but I can look back on it with clarity now that he hung up the phone with her and he screamed at me down the hallway and he's like, someone should cut your mother's belly open like a pig. And that seared this almost branded in my brain, this, this belief, this false Belief that relationships equal pain. Relationships equal pain. Let me know if y' all can feel this. I'm sharing this. Not to get attention or not to be like, look. Look at how hard my life has been. My. My memory that I'm sharing with y' all inserted a false belief. It inserted a story that relationships cause pain, relationships don't work out, Relationships equal abandonment, Relationships equal the opposite of love. And in my life, I've done a lot of work that we're about to do together on this ama. That is exactly how I did it. I mean, what we're about to paint the picture of right here, you can start to identify. And you all know it. You can feel it right now. There's a story that's been running like a loop because of something your dad said, because of something your mom said, because of something your caregiver said. A teacher, a friend, whatever. It doesn't always have to be in childhood. Sometimes it can be in adolescence or teenagehood. So for me, that's 17. That's a memory that I'm sure you can hear the emotion of my voice because, wow, like, how wounded of a man he must have been. How can I practice compassion for him? And the story that I'm creating in my life that actually is of service to me and him. So let's get into it. The impact of this limiting belief, if I would have allowed it to continue instead of catching it in my early 30s, I could have actually gone into every single relationship in my life, including my current one, and said to my partner, unconsciously, to my woman, unconsciously, this isn't going to work out. Can y' all see the. The absolute power of taking an honest inventory of the beliefs that were inserted or that were branded into your psyche. This is so huge. So somebody listening might have a belief because their. Their mom actually said, I don't love you. Can you imagine the pain of this mark? Or somebody had a caregiver that said, you're unlovable. I mean, the trauma that that would create. So your mental health suffers. Because when these beliefs run on autopilot, they create two things. They create anxiety or depression and self doubt. Now, self doubt is the biggest one, because self doubt stops you in relationships from connecting authentically. If you have doubt about yourself or loving yourself, it shows up where the woman or man in front of you actually can't love you because they can't give you anything that you don't have the capacity to receive because you haven't given it to yourself. Now, that seems like a Bit of an esoteric concept. So let me go a little bit slower. I'm holding up a can of update on the video right now. If this can is empty, then it has full capacity to receive. But if I have a hole in the bottom of the can, whatever someone pours into it is just going to leak out. And that's what these stories are, y', all, that. The stories are the hole in the bottom of your bucket where all the love that gets poured into you from someone else just leaks out. And it leaks out. And we can plug it right now. So let's plug it right. If you have a hole in your bucket, or another analogy, if you have a car and the E brake is on and you keep mashing down the gas pedal, you keep going to the boardroom, you keep building things and you're creating stuff from a place of a lack of love, then you're never going to get fulfilled. You're going to. You're going to get the million dollars in the bank account and you're still going to hate yourself. You're still going to have a hole in the bucket. You're still going to have that E break on. So here it is. The beliefs that you've told yourself are literally just a story. They're just a story. So let's break this down, Mar. There's three things we can do to shift into a real truth where we can make the trauma or the event that happened neutral and we can practice compassion for the person that inflicted the pain upon us. How do we do this?

There's three truths about how to basically regain our power and take our power back. Because usually we fall into the victim mentality. It's like, oh, this happened to me and this is who I am and I can't get out of it. This is what my life is. So the three truths are. Beliefs are not facts. Super important. It's like it's not truth. Beliefs are not the truth. You have the power to choose new beliefs. Always.

Always.

There's options, there's limitless possibilities of what you can choose for yourself. And the third one is repetition rewires the brain. So the more you practice it, the more you become it. That's basically it. And that's related to something that you really like to talk about, which is neuroplasticity. Do you want to go into that a little bit?

Let's go into it. So the analogy. I love this. Beliefs are not facts. You have the power to choose new beliefs, which we're doing right now. So believe it like whatever story came up in your mind earlier when we talked about the meaning that we place onto these events and the beliefs that are stored from them and how those beliefs create the whole, this is really real, you guys. Because in the same way that you can have a hole in your bucket, you can plug it in, in the same way that you can think you're not lovable, or you can think you're not worthy, you can actually think yourself through conscious inventory to be more neuroplastic in the ways that your little cells, your axons and your dendrites to get scientific code, your brain. So neuroplasticity is this science of how we can actually mold new channels of thought in our brain. And it happens like both in software and in hardware. So the software is the thoughts that we think, the emotions that we attach to our thoughts. The hardware is actually these neuroplastic channels in the structure, the physicality of our brain. And so every single time you practice what we're doing today, which is, hey, my beliefs are not true, my beliefs are actually causing me pain. Take a breath. Well, if that belief is not true and it's creating this result in my life, how can I be honest with that belief and the pain that it's caused for me? And how can I just choose, because I love myself, to create a new one? Every single time you go through what we're about to go through, you literally physically rewire your brain. So first identify this. Like, let's go through this process. This is a step by step process. We've done a lot of work up to this point. First, identify the belief. What is the story I'm telling myself? Write it down. Write it down on a piece of paper, speak it into your phone, however you want to do it, and ask yourself, okay, is this true? Next step, challenge the belief. Is this belief actually true? There's a lot of different systems out there in psychology and personal development. You don't have to make this complicated. You're going to meet yourself in this process. And we'll talk about that in resistance later. Write it down. So, for example, Mar, to use your story, or to use my story, I would write down relationships cause pain. Relationships won't work. Well, that's obviously not true, right? Is this belief true? What evidence proves or disproves it? Well, I see a lot of people around me that have loving relationships. I know it's possible because I see it around me. So get curious now. Get curious in this. Step number two, how can I change my belief based on the evidence that I see around me that has nothing to do with the way that I unconsciously operate in my life. So challenge your belief. So then I replace that with I'm a man who was learning how to trust relationships. I mean, just like feel the difference of this belief. Number one, relationships cause pain, relationships don't work. Then I get curious. This is actually a really important step in step number two where you challenge your belief. Can I be curious enough to gather the evidence around me that has nothing to do with my current structure, with my current belief? And then really, really important, really important. Honestly, this is probably the most important thing. Replace your current belief with a new belief that you feel is self serving and that you feel is more loving. Now this is at first gonna feel super counterintuitive. You know, this, this is actually the part of Law of Attraction loa that I think most people get wrong. They'll say things intellectually, Mar, but they won't believe them in their body. They're not acting as if. Yeah, sometimes when you go on the new journey of identifying the belief, challenging the belief, getting curious, gathering evidence outside yourself that the beliefs that you've coded for yourself are not true. And how can you insert others beliefs? Because we're all just sharing beliefs, right? When you create an affirmation and when you start having a meditation practice or a journaling practice, or just any kind of practice where you're validating and you're building this infrastructure in your psyche that for you, I might give the example, mar, that you are learning or you are in the process of accepting that your parents have always and will always love you. I mean it's just such a more empowering belief. But it takes time, it's going to be clunky, y'. All. So just give yourself grace and start to act as if. So mar, how do we act as if? Because intellectually it makes sense, the three step process we talked about. But acting as if is a really powerful way to reinforce all the work that we've just done.

How I would describe it is you imagine what we can call it, a higher self, which is the healed self, or somebody who has already embodied the things that you envision for yourself. What it would look like in the future, what would they do if, for example, if you are fully loved by your parents, what would myself do if I would be loved by my parents? So what would that look like in the future? So you basically envision the feeling of what it is and how the person acts and see, okay, what does my life look like when this is my reality. So you're basically manifesting in real time because the brain cannot recognize what's just a thought, what's reality, or what's something that might happen in the future. It's just information. So the brain eventually, if you train it over and over again, will believe that that's the new reality.

It's so good because it's not about faking it till we make it. I want to be really clear about that. Like, I actually think that's bullshit. Fake it till you make it. I've mentioned this a few times on our podcast before, but I got this from Dr. J. Tita and he said it's not about faking it until you're making it. It's about being it until you see it. So you be it until you see it on the screen. Right now we're linking another AMA that we've done where I went very deep into the be do have process. We don't have time in this AMA to go there, but it's on the screen right now. As you repeat, consistency, right? Repetition is the mother of all skill. As you repeat this process of identifying, challenging, getting curious, replacing it, and then acting as if resistance is going to come. I'm not here to say this is some super simple process. It is simple, but it's not easy because you can have the framework. You can really let this podcast hit your heart. But when you go to execute and when you go to actually put these thoughts into action, you're going to meet yourself. You're going to meet unconsciously your heart, your solar plexus, your sacral chakra, or even your mind. It's going to feel, I want to be honest about this, it's on the screen right now. It's going to feel counterintuitive. It is not going to feel comfortable. This is really, really important about personal development that I don't think people focus on enough. It's not going to feel right. Quote, quote. This is why the whole gut feeling thing, I don't always align with it because when you start facing fears, when you start facing judgments, you're going to meet the part of yourself that's super messy. You know, this. This part of yourself that's like disheveled and disorganized and doesn't know how to feel things. So when you meet resistance, this is the one thing that I want you to do from now on, just give yourself a phrase or a prayer or something that allows you to move forward even though it doesn't feel Intuitive, right? Intuition is built and sharpened like a sword over time, right? Intuition is way different than instinct. Instinct is like frickin reptilian, right? Instinct is like, oh my God, I'm gonna die, or oh my God, that person. Anytime we find ourselves in a snap judgment or a snap reaction, it actually has nothing to do with our, with our intuition. It has everything to do with our reactivity or our instinct. If you. A good analogy would be if you place a pet in a cage. You see this a lot with animals at the zoo. When you start to beat the life of an out of an animal by putting it in a cage, it becomes extremely reactive. We are half beast, we are half spirit. So when you start putting us in a cage, which society can do, which we're here to undo by this conversation, you can unfortunately fall into these mental loops or these traps where you start becoming more and more and more reactive to life. We're playing a different game. And the only way we can play this different game is by turning around the mirror that we're projecting on everyone else and shining it on us and saying, I got you, I love you. We can do this. Just say that phrase, I got you. I love you. We can do this. I got you. I love you. We can do this. Say that as many times as you can, as many times as you possibly can before you quit. Don't quit without doing that. Do that and offer yourself a grounding exercise. I'm like, what's a great exercise, Mara, that you love? When it comes to all the work that we've done up to this point, Meeting the resistance, how do we ground ourselves? When the alarm bells are going off and it doesn't feel real, remember, it's going to feel counterintuitive, y'. All.

For me personally, this happens often. And I actually do that whenever I feel a little trigger or I feel like I'm doing something that my higher self would not want to do. And a great example is, for example, recording this AMA episodes, because I have loads of limiting beliefs around how I talk and how I present myself. So sometimes before we record, close my eyes and take a deep breath and I come back to the present moment. Because I only have a choice when I'm present. That's where I tap into my awareness and connect with my consciousness. And I can tell myself whatever I need to hear at that moment. And usually that is that I have a choice. So whatever I want to be, I can choose to be it. And I can in this moment, choose to either be nervous, be afraid, and not fulfill my potential. Or I can imagine, as we talked previously, I can imagine what my higher self would do and just decide, choose to take that route instead and act as if I was already there, as if I was speaking fluently on a podcast and everybody loved it and I was confident and all of that. So that's what I usually practice.

It's beautiful because the truth of where we are, everybody can feel. Yet when we try to push away or hide how we're actually feeling or how we actually are, everybody can feel it. And that's why some people get stuck in these loops. I'm laughing, but it's not sad. It's like I've done it so many times in my life. That's why I think it's funny. If we can just be honest with ourselves about where we actually are in the journey. Oh, my God. It's like huge exhale. There's not so much pressure. Personal development, personal growth, liberation does not have to be 100% serious all the time. We can bring some brevity and some lightness to this conversation. See, I'm actually doing in real time, y', all, with a very lesson plan that we've put forth today. I am letting you know that it's okay to have permission of grace for yourself. As you say, I love you. We got this. As you go through whatever feels good for you, right? So for you, Mar you shared the way that you ground, you could even say something like, I am not my past. I'm not my past. I am whatever I choose to be in this moment. Now, again, you're going to meet resistance. It's not going to feel real. But just because it doesn't feel real doesn't mean that you cannot make it real. So in closing, do this. Share. This is how all change happens. Change happens through vulnerability. Right? Vulnerability is the opposite of egotism. Vulnerability is the opposite of hiding. Like, we all have problems. We all have problems. Stop hiding. Stop hiding. And I say that with grace. Live your life liberated. Because when you are honest and when you do what I'm about to ask you to do, it shines light on the truth of where you are. And then the darkness and the pressure can't hold you as tight. So write in the comments below or email us podcastellnessandwisdom.com and share what is a script that I've been believing that I am ready to create a new script on? What is a belief? Just one. Start with one. That's another piece I'll share with y'. All. Don't try to do five things at once. You felt it when I shared my story. You felt it when Mar shared her story. Whatever story came up in your. In your psyche, in your unconscious that you know is holding you back because you know it. You know it. Write it down. The belief that I've identified through this process today is that I am blank. The new belief that I'm creating and that I'm calling in support for is this. I promise you, just by you doing that. This is how we make the unquantifiable, quantifiable. This is how you start to have personal development and spirituality. Be really practical. So pause. Take five minutes, identify one limiting belief, replace it with an empowering one, and then do the work that we've talked about today so that when resistance comes up, you can hold yourself, you can be there for yourself, and you can make this a lifelong process. See, this is beautiful. Marge has had her cat come on the screen right now, right? Cats don't have to mess around with this cast. Cats don't have limiting beliefs. They just. They just operate as is. This is why I think it was Peter Kern that said this. You know, the. The people that we learn the most from, the. The. The life forms that we learn the most from are children and pets, because pets are just being. Children are just being. They haven't learned all these false beliefs. And we can get there, y'. All. I promise you, we can get there. This is a starting place for you. This is a framework for healing. This is very practical. This is not just pie in the sky. This is real for you. So here's my adventure for you. My adventure that I'd love for you to go on is to watch this podcast again. Listen to it, let it soak in, and let this be a starting place where you then can call forth a community and a tribe that will actually help you and assist you in making this real. We're not meant to do it alone. Nobody's a lone wolf, and the lone wolves always die. You are not a lone wolf. You were built to thrive. Come join us. It's on the screen now. LiberatedLife.com join our community. Be a part of the first wave of people that are entering the community. There is very practical lessons and curriculum and things that'll take you from maybe a 1 or a 2 all the way up to an 8, 9, or 10 in all, five sides of your wellness pentagon. That's my promise to you. That's why we've built this community with the lessons and with the infrastructure so you can actually move your life in the direction that you want it to be. Mara, we covered a lot of ground, and we both shared some stories. I'm curious, what do you think we missed when it comes to vulnerability and honesty and true inventory of where someone is on their journey to liberation, what do you think we missed from a woman's perspective?

I can share from my personal experience that the beginning stages of this whole process of uncovering the limiting beliefs. Because. Because it seems like there are not many, but there are so many. Like, I just keep going and going and going. There's more and more. And at some point, it will get fun and, like, you can start enjoying it, but the beginnings, you're just gonna feel miserable for quite some time, and you feel like you're going crazy and this will never end.

It's gonna be messy. Yes, it's gonna be messy.

Yeah. But at some point, you reach a point where life just gets so much better and, like, you can finally be yourself and not overthink every situation. You can be and more loving and just life starts making so much sense and gets so much easier. So it's just all this work is so worth it. Like, I would never, never go back to where I was before. It's just completely different life now.

Yes. Well said. If you stuck with us till now, you know that once you know you can't go back.

Yeah.

Once you're on this journey of spiritual and personal growth, you can't go back. By the way, would you.

No.

Like, would you really want to go back? No way. Y'. All. All right, leave us a question if you'd like. We're going to keep doing this every week for free, for value, for impact, so that you can go from a 1 or a 2 all the way up to an 8, 9, or a 10. Join us at liberatedlife.com until we see you on another podcast, another AMA. We're both wishing you love and wellness, but most, most importantly, peace and power. All right. Yeah, we'll talk to you soon.