Conversation between Mimi and host Josh Trent (YouTube, Apr 10, 2024) exploring how shame around pleasure—sexual and non-sexual—reduces presence and contributes to stress. Mimi argues that cultivating pleasure (via simple, 3–5 minute embodied practices like breathwork, noticing sensations, and small daily moments of stillness) increases presence, reduces shame, and supports healing (she references HPV stress connection). Josh relates personal examples (sinus issues, shame, calendar-blocked self-love) and distinguishes genuine nourishing pleasure from pseudo-hedonism. Practical exercises and encouragement to lean into feminine flow for women are emphasized.
Chapters
Sex is wonderful. We are sexual beings. There is no reason why we should feel shame about being sexual beings. It's literally the thing that keeps our. Our. Our humanity continuing on the human race continuing. Like, we all need this. There's nothing to be shamed about there, but yet we do. There is still shame. And I think the homeopathy piece is, you know, this. This pleasure, right? We shame pleasure not just in a sexual sense, but even like, oh, I shouldn't have had that piece of cake, but you loved that piece of cake. Oh, I shouldn't have gotten that massage. I should have, you know, I should have cleaned the house instead. Like, but you loved that massage. It was pleasurable. You. You found peace and relaxation within that. So, like, we. We should and should not on ourselves all the time. And we carry this guilt or shame with us when we absolutely don't need to. So I think in least for me, the antidote is actually more pleasure. So what I mean by that is being present enough in your life to notice and to experience the full bouquet of pleasure in your life that is available to you. The reason why pleasure is important is because you can't experience pleasure without being present, without paying attention, right? Talk to any woman. If she's up in her head during sex, there's a zero chance that she's prob. That she's gonna orgasm, right? Like, we know that you have to be present in your body and willing to surrender to the experience, to ex. To. To feel that pleasure. And so that presence is important, I think, especially when it comes to hpv, because a big piece that we haven't really talked about much is the stress piece. And how many of us are walking around with our. We're like, okay, scroll, scroll, email, email, work, work. And we're just in this go mode all the time, not even present in our own lives to experience the pleasure that is running that is so bountiful if we would just put our awareness there. So I think tapping into more pleasure in your life taps you into presence. Presence makes you slow down, breathe. You know how important breath is. Breathe into your belly. You're not up in your chest and just giving yourself even five minutes of pleasure. Every day is five minutes of stillness, five minutes of breath, and five minutes of presence. And I think that is the. The courageous path for the woman is leaning into this. This pleasure aspect. And, you know, if we're just speaking to women, I think men and women both could certainly develop their skills in this area. But for women, you know, I talk to a lot of women who are. And you know this, a lot of women have a really hard time getting into their feminine feeling that feminine flow within them. I don't think your partner has any problem getting into her feminine. From what I see, she seems very.
You'll have to ask her. I have no comment on that. That's the safer path for me.
Well, I. How I perceive her, at least in our little exchanges on Instagram and such, is she is this beautiful representation of feminine flow. And so I think that's really important for women, you know, that are living in their masculine. That are maybe climbing the corporate ladder, and they're 28, 30. 30 years old, and now have this HPV diagnosis. And if they talk to someone like me, work with someone like me, I'm going to encourage you to step into that pleasure, surrender, find feminine flow in your life more and more and more.
Yeah, y' all are going to hate what I'm about to say. But I think I know I have the gnosis. I love that you said that. I have the. The knowing that for me and my life, my mark on with my sinuses, my battle with my weight, shame around pornography, relationships, inner child work, all of these different aspects of self are literally God mirroring back to me a way that I can be more loving to Josh first and then I can give that to Kerry. Michelle, I can be more present with you. We can go have tacos, and I'm actually just, like, present with you while we eat the tacos instead of thinking, does she like me? Is there something going on? Like, all of these mental constructs that the ego is just really trying to protect itself by are completely washed away. And this is like the paradigm, the paradox of life. By the opposite, the very thing that it's afraid of is the very, like you said, poison of the homeopathy that can provide the healing. So how do we get rid of shame? We actually dive into pleasure. Now, for me, I want to be careful when I say this. Like, it's not just about hedonistic pleasure, where we're, like, gonna go party and do a bunch of psychedelics and say that there's ceremony, but it's actually just a party and you just want to have fun. There's the pseudo eros, the pseudo pleasure that I think people can fall into, where it's like, it's all good vibes, bro, and, like, that's life, and if it doesn't feel good, don't do it. The middle ground on that is big. In my calendar, it actually says self, love, from five to six. It's a fucking calendar invite Mimi. If I. If it's not in my calendar, it doesn't happen. It works for me that way. I don't know how you and Chase do it, but like, how do you, how do you make sure that you're not going to the pseudo pleasure and that you're actually nourishing yourself with the real kind of pleasure that's going to give you the healing in all aspects of self? How do you do that for you?
I simplify. It can be really, really, really simple. We like to over complicate things in our culture, society. And you know, I think these complex health issues, there is this assumption that the, the answer must be very complex. But I think that it's oftentimes way simpler than we think it is. So for me, I mean, it can be really simple. So like, for anyone who's just listening, I'm just closing my eyes, my hands are on my thighs, and I can, I can literally just slow my breath down and drop into. What am I feeling in my body right now? That's all you have to do. You can do this sitting, you know, on the toilet, in your bathroom, outside on your back porch, in your car. Before you go, you head inside from a long day of work. This is a really good time to transition into that feminine flow and really dip into pleasure. Certainly before sex. If you are a feminine essence, if you are the feminine representative in your relationship, I would highly recommend trying. This practice takes three to five minutes and you might just experience a heart opening, really powerful orgasm from this. So you can just get really quiet still, close your eyes, put your hands on the tops of your thighs. Even just that. If you have like bare skin, just feeling how soft your skin is like, and just leaning into that and like maybe make a noise. Like, what would that noise feel like in my body if I were to. To give a noise to that pleasure? Right. Whatever that looks like for you.
Nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom, nom.
Yeah. Or just like a. Hmm.
Yeah.
Can be very, very simple. Or you know, even just sitting in this chair, this chair is super comfy. Like I'm just noticing how good my butt feels in this chair. That feels awesome. If I was outside, I would probably be sitting in the sun and just noticing how good the sun feels. Or maybe I would take a deep breath into my lungs and notice how good the cold air feels inside my lungs. Maybe I would take an even deeper breath past the point of what I think I can hold and really fill my lungs and then let everything out, cleansing all of that stagnant air that's been sitting in my lungs. Like, it can be that simple. It doesn't even have to be sexual. It can be, of course, but it just tune into like, what am I hearing? Oh, I'm hearing some birds chirp in the distance. Oh my God, I love that noise. I'm feeling the sun on my cheeks. I'm feeling my hands on my own soft skin. I'm feeling my body being supported by this chair. That feels so good. Like, even just two minutes of that, I feel softer. Right? And if we get into this habit of willingly going into softness, then we're more present, we are certainly more still providing that stillness for our body. And we are more. We are more available. We are more tapped in and able to extract all the juice that is available to us at all times, basically everywhere.
And that was so beautiful. I was actually just thinking, I need to go in the sun when we're done. Even though it's 30 degrees out here, 28 degrees. For parents, what you just talked about is so important. It's almost like the higher you climb, the more you can fall when it comes to these habits. So as a parent, and I'm sure for you and your man, that's in the future, it has to be in some form. Maybe you can share about that, maybe not. But when we're parents, the load of stress and the things that pull us away from the present moment increase. Especially times two, because I have a daughter and a son. So if I don't have it in my schedule, this is actually the call to action for all of us to just put it in your schedule. Like, you're so worthy. We're so worthy of this and it's so simple. But like, are you doing it? That's actually the thing. Can you schedule 30 or 60 minutes for yourself and actually do that? Can you have a self love? I don't want to say challenge because that's the wrong word. Can you just have a self love, commitment and agreement to you that allows you to do the things. Maybe it's the two minutes of just touching your legs or sitting in presence or gosh, it's so simple. It's so freaking simple, Mimi. But like, actually, are we doing it? That's where the rubber meets the road. And I think behind that is really a journey of am I worthy enough to keep my promise to myself? That's what it's been for me. Check out some of the videos on this screen that are perfectly curated based on the video you just saw. Make sure you follow me and I'll see you in the next video.
