Josh TrentIdentity Transformation Architect and award winning Host of the Wellness + Wisdom Podcast—a decade-strong show with over 750 episodes and 15M downloads.

You don't have to be a perfect parent #podcast

30 Jul 2026 · 1 min

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0:35

In this brief podcast excerpt, Speaker A introduces the concept that parents don’t need to be perfect to raise securely attached children; instead, they should aim to be a “solid B” – consistently good more often than not. The discussion uses a gas‑tank analogy: when a parent’s emotional “tank” is full, they have greater self‑regulation, a sense of nervous‑system safety, and more inhibition, which translates into being present, conscious, and attuned to their child. Speaker A acknowledges that even professionals experience moments of dysregulation (the “E” level), and emphasizes the role of grace and mercy when parents slip into lower emotional states (C, D, F), which can lead to insecure attachment in children. Speaker B reacts with relief, highlighting the reduced pressure of the “solid B” mindset. The exchange underscores practical, compassionate parenting strategies that balance realistic self‑awareness with the goal of fostering secure attachment.

You don't have to be a perfect parent to raise a secure kid. You have to be like a B. You have to be a solid B to raise a secure kid.
Oh, that relieves the pressure.
And that's basically you get it right more than you get it wrong. But the gas tank analogy is like when our gas tank is full, we have more self-regulation. Our nervous system feels safer. We have more inhibition.
We have more ability to be present, to be conscious, to be attuned.
Even I, who teaches this for a living, can have moments of dysregulation because I'm on E. And that's where grace and mercy comes in. It's when we start getting in the low C, D, F territory, then we start to see insecurely attached kids.
What are other ways ways that all of us as parents can be at that B.