Episode 002: The Fearless Entrepreneur: Bonita Davis

Hey there, Fearless Family! This is Will checking in with you with the Fearless Entrepreneur Podcast, where I interview some of the most influential people who have conquered their fears to pursue their passion in entrepreneurship. So kick back, relax, and let's unleash your fearlessness. Today we're speaking with Benita Davis. Benita, are you prepared to show us how you became a fearless entrepreneur?

I'm going to do my best.

Yeah, so, uh, we'll dive in with Benita in one moment, but right now we're going to take a second to thank our sponsors. Phyllis family, if you're looking to start a business, one of the things that you need to have is an online presence. Well, I have a secret for you right now. You can go and purchase your first domain for 99 cents at godaddy.com. Just visit our link www.thefearless.co/godaddy, and you'll have the opportunity to purchase your first .com for 99 cents. Again, that's thefearless.co/godaddy. So what's up, Fearless Family? Today we're chatting it up with Benita Davis. She is an author, entrepreneur, philanthropist, and visionary. Benita, before we dive all the way into your business, I want you to tell us a little bit about who you are or who you were as a kid and what was your biggest fear back then?

Who was I as a kid? I think that I've always been a hopeful creative. I've always been a writer. I've always loved music and people. And I come from a family where I'm the baby. So that kind of afforded me a lot of opportunity to— some people might say it's spoiled, but I just say well-loved. So I've always been in an environment where I was able to express myself and really go after my dreams. So I guess my biggest fear would be— and I guess as young Benita wouldn't have articulated it like this, but I'm looking back, I think it was probably inadequacy. I had everything I needed to be great and successful, so to kind of fall below that would be horrible for me, for lack of better words.

Well, tell me this, as that being younger Benita, how How does the older or seasoned Bonita— how did the seasoned Bonita get over that fear?

You know, I don't think the seasoned Bonita has technically gotten over that fear. I think the seasoned Bonita doesn't allow that fear to cripple her. So whereas it's always in the back of my mind, there is so much that you can do, and you need to go after it. It's that that motivates me. It's that that pushes me. My fear of not living up to a standard that I've set for myself is its own driving force. So I think I live with a little bit every single day, but I think there's a healthy amount of fear that we all have that keeps us from complacency. And I think that's what it is, but never to a point where I am not able to perform, so to speak, because I just feel like I won't measure up.

Incredible story. And basically what I got from that, Fearless Family, is that fear isn't a bad thing. You can use fear to actually motivate you as well, to push you forward, keep you from being complacent, just understanding and identifying Recognizing that fear up front is key, and knowing that it's there but not letting it dictate what happens or your actions throughout. So I definitely appreciate you sharing that with us. Absolutely. Let's talk a little bit about your business today. How do you make money in your business as of right now?

So I'm an author. I recently released my first children's book entitled Do You Know Who God Is? And I am also a blogger. And there's opportunity for businesses, companies, and individuals to buy ad space on the blog. And the blog site is sheisbenita.com.

Great. How did you get started in your business?

Well, like I said earlier, I've always been a writer. Writing is a passion of mine. And I honestly, I started doing my blog as a source of venting. After a broken engagement that I had, and the response from so many men and women who'd been through situations where their hearts were broken, maybe not necessarily a broken engagement, but a bad relationship, or they were brokenhearted for some reason, they started reaching out to me, and it became my thing.

Tell me, how old were you when you realized that you, you know, you wanted to do what you're doing now?

Well, I'm 30 now, so I would say 28.

So not too long ago.

Not too long ago.

What did you have to figure out once you started, you know, writing and doing your blog and then going into the realm of being an author?

At the risk of tooting my own horn, because that's not my intention, I've always been a good writer. What I needed to figure out was what my purpose was. With writing. I needed to know what my direction was. I quickly figured out that my passion and my purpose was in helping people get through hurting situations or heartbroken situations.

Good. So Fearless Family, at the end of the day, having a talent is good, but having the talent without any direction or purpose is like jumping in a car and not knowing what your destination is. You have to have, you know, a clear plan or clear path on where you should be going, or at least some kind of direction. Now, that thing may change as you go along, but you have to put yourself in that journey first to kind of understand what it's going to be. So thank you for, for answering that. We here at The Fearless Entrepreneur talk a lot about taking the leap, you know, that leap into pursuing what your dream is. Take us to a moment When you started your entrepreneurial journey, that point in your life where you realized, hey, this is what I want to do, what was the biggest fear you had to confront when taking that leap? And explain what that felt like for you.

So I think especially for writers, but I think for any creative individual that is putting their heart and mind and soul on the line for other people to witness and take part in, The biggest intimidation is for it not to be either received or not to be received in the manner in which you put it out there. For me, when I started sheisbenita.com, I was literally giving the world intimate details of a very, very private and hurtful time in my life. So that came with a level of vulnerability. That I knew I wasn't strong enough to handle. But with just my confidence that the charge that God had given me was the direction He wanted me to go, I went out on a limb and I did it. Thankfully, it came back to me wholly and fully, and people were appreciative, and people didn't take it as an opportunity to judge my life. But they took it as an opportunity to see that, hey, I'm not the only person going through it. And what I like to tell people all the time about the She Is Bonita blog is, yeah, this is my story specifically, but it's not my story only. There are so many people alive that have had broken hearts, that have experienced what I've experienced. And I wanted it to be a community of people that knew that there is life after heartbreak, there is love after heartbreak. And I guess I guess that was my biggest fear, that that wouldn't be projected. Also, with the children's book, I think that my biggest fear was because I'm not an illustrator, I had to find someone that could really take what was going on in my mind, which is not always clear, and draw it out for me to visualize and for the world to visualize. So I was really nervous about that, that that wouldn't work out. But, uh, Rodney Johnson is an incredible, incredible illustrator, and I thank God for him. And also, I didn't know how received the content would be. And it's something that nobody ever knew that I had a desire to do. So I didn't know what the reception from my supporters would be either. Like, she wants to do a children's book? And I don't even have children. So there's another irony in that. But did I answer your question?

Yeah, you definitely answered. So what I gather from that is, you know, at the end of the day, when you're taking that leap, you have to understand that you're putting yourself out there. You're going to be a little bit vulnerable, and it's okay. What you end up learning is that when you get outside of your comfort zone, get outside of your feelings— is how I like to call it, get out of your feelings— and take the leap, you'll realize that you have more supporters more people that will follow your story more so than that fear that you had of people judging you and having something else to say. They actually love the perspective of what it is. And once you get out of your own way and take that leap, it's always an awesome experience. And when you put it out there in the world, you know, it's awesome to put things out there into the universe and see what happens. And in doing that and taking the leap, it's an awesome experience and you can see what happens. You're able to become an author without necessarily— or become a children's book author without necessarily having to have a child, but understanding that, hey, this relates to people. I know that it's there. Let me put it out there as well.

So can I just say something that you said is so true? When you put something out into the world, anytime you put something out into the world, the world gives you something back. And you never really know what that give back is going to be. But for as many people who tell me that I've either inspired them or encouraged them, or, you know, they're proud of me, or whatever compliment. They have no idea how much they inspire me and encourage me. So honestly, something that I created and built to be an encouragement for other people ended up being the encouragement I needed as well.

Yeah, man, I definitely understand that. One of the other things I got out of that and not to dwell on the leap, was the fact that you understand that you may need a team in order to build it, not going and taking this leap alone. And if you guys don't know Fearless Entrepreneur family, Bonita has been a part of the Fearless Entrepreneur family from the beginning, along with Rodney. So being able to surround yourself with people, like-minded people, like-minded entrepreneurs that are here to essentially help you in whatever your journey is, and having access to those people is great to have that, that support system. So I thank her for being a part of this deal and believing in The Fearless Entrepreneur. At the end of the day, I want people to take advantage of it the way it should be taken advantage of. So if you have a dream, you have a purpose, you have a passion that you want to pursue, and you may not know how, when, where, that's what we're here for, to actually provide that and as a collective put you on a course to where you want to be. So awesome story. Love it. Love where you are today and love the book. Yeah. Tell us some tips you would give to those who are having, you know, some hesitations with pursuing their passion related to some of the fears that you or some of the hesitations that you had and challenges that you had? What are, what are a few tips that you can give them?

Well, I guess I would start with saying that if you never ask the question, the answer is no, 100% of the time. So if you never go after it, you'll never get it. And I think a lot of times people allow the fear of failure to keep them from going after what they want. But what you got to realize is failure is on the path to success. You're talking to somebody, I am I get excited about everything and I involve myself in a lot of things. I have failed businesses under my belt. I have, you know, degrees that I've started and switched because I realized that's not what I wanted to do. I ended up in a career path that I never thought I would end up in just because of just going along with life and getting, you know, I was good at what I was doing and I'm still good at it. But it wasn't my passion. So at some point, I had to realize that I can't get stuck in the cycle of life that allows me comfort, but allows me to be comfortable, but doesn't allow me to be great. And I think one of my favorite quotes is that comfort is the enemy of greatness. And we all do it. I've done it before. I'm sure there have been times when some of the world's greatest have done it. We've been good in a spot, and you have to move yourself out out of that spot. And it's hard to move yourself out of comfort because it is what it is. It— you're comfortable there, you feel safe there, you feel secure there. But I think I heard you say earlier, Will, that you have to be comfortable being uncomfortable. That's how greatness is achieved.

Fearless family, first you have to ask the questions. So a closed mouth never gets fed. So you have to put yourself out there and be willing to take those nos. As a background in sales, if Anybody understands that. Anyone in sales will, you know, you have to go through a certain amount of nos to get a yes. So you have to look at it as a percentage. If I can go through 10 nos, I get 1 yes. So asking the question and getting out there.

I've just got one more thing to add. I have a lot of people ask me, you know, what's the process of becoming an author? Can you tell me how you did it? And a lot of the fears that I get, or a lot of the hindrances that I get are financial. And I tell people all the time, and I don't mean this to sound cliché, but if you trust the vision that God has given you, then you have to trust that he's going to give you provision to carry it out. And I think that that is something that stops every single one of us every day. But if it comes down to you stop eating out and you set budgets for yourself and you set a budget for your goal, then do that. I'm not saying everybody's in the position to just quit their job and go after their dream, but you either want it and you go after it or you make excuses about it. And I think people have to realize they have a lot more control over their life than they understand. And as soon as you understand the level of control you have over your life, that's when you go forward and beyond.

Comfort is the enemy of greatness. You can't be great being complacent, being in your comfort zone. The magic happens when you step outside of that comfort zone. So you have to get comfortable with being uncomfortable, knowing that it's going to come, knowing that it's going to happen. You know what it is. That's half the battle. And any fear or any anxiety, you know what the result is. You just got to get out of your own way again and just make it happen. Either you want it or you kind of want it. If you kind of want it, that means you don't want it. So stop making the excuses. And one of my favorite quotes is, "Make it happen." That's all it takes at the end of the day. Either make it happen or don't. So I want to make sure I recap everything. Ask the questions. Get comfortable with being uncomfortable. Don't let your financial position at the moment hinder your vision. Pursue it either way. And there's always a way that once you pursue the vision and put it out there, the finances will come. You just have to put forth the effort to make it happen rather than using the finance as an excuse. So figure out a way to make it work for you. If that means eating ramen noodles every now and then, make it happen. So awesome tips that Bonita just dropped on us. How did you get your business from just open to actually thriving?

I would love to take credit for it, but I cannot. You said earlier that, you know, your level of success is largely dependent on the people that are around you. And I have a phenomenal team of people starting with the Fearless Entrepreneur, who, by the way, was the referral source to get me to Rodney for the Divine Adventures book. But just my support system has been amazing. That doesn't take away from the fact that, yes, I worked hard, but nobody gets to the top alone. And I challenge myself daily to remember that. God gave me a talent, and I am grateful for that. But that talent alone isn't what touches people. It's the people that I have around me that help me push it, that motivate me when I need motivation, that will retweet or post on IG or Facebook that they need to buy the book or that they read the book and it inspired them. That's what has gotten me where I am. I'm very, very, very aware of that, and I'm completely grateful.

Good deal. So surround yourself around people that are going to, you know, motivate you, put you on the path, and people that are like-minded. And at the end of the day, like she said, you can only go so far So actually getting that team, getting a group of people that, you know, want to see you successful, they are just as passionate about your dream as they are their own, and holding you accountable, making sure that they share through social media and all aspects. And, you know, they want to uplift you because that makes them just as excited as well. And that's the kind of culture that we build, you know, with the Fearless Entrepreneur. And I'm happy that you guys are listening in with the Fearless Entrepreneur podcast because that's what we want to instill in everyone, even if you're not a part of what the membership is and things of that nature. I want people to take on that culture because when you take on that aspect, that mindset, there's absolutely nothing that's impossible because you have a group of people everywhere that are willing to put themselves out there for you and help you and push you toward whatever your dreams are. Tell me this, what's been your most successful story as an entrepreneur thus far?

I think it's twofold. I think the initial rollout of my blog was, I would, I would call that success. A personal success because obviously, like I said earlier, it was a complete vulnerable moment. I didn't know what to expect. I was airing my dirty laundry for the world to see. And I don't care who you are, that's never a comfortable position to be in. So that was a personal success for me, which I think are just as important as financial successes. And then financially, it would definitely be the release date of my first children's book. It was astounding, the excitement that was generated off of it, the sales that I got off of it. I was able to— I self-published, which basically means I front all the money for the creation of the book, the illustration, the marketing, and everything like that. And I was able to make myself whole on day one. So I completely recouped my entire investment on the first day of sales.

That's unheard of.

It was all gone.

Well, that is something definitely to be excited about. And I would definitely say that's probably— that's a success. You can recoup your investment on day one. That's an awesome experience. Tell me this. What are you most excited about in your business today?

I am excited about seeing where my book goes. I have a lot of ideas. There are a lot of plans in motion in the back end. As I told you guys, I'm always into something. I'm always working on something. And thankfully, with the help of The Fearless Entrepreneur and my business manager, Jonathan Scott, we've got a lot of things coming. And I am so excited. I don't even know how to articulate it right now. But yes, there are a lot of plans for Divine Adventures. I really, really, really pray that this book blesses young children and adults alike. To learn about God, be excited about Jesus.

Good. Well, adversity happens no matter the amount of achievements and success that you— or success that you have in life. And it's usually when you're able to get through that adversity that you're able to overcome that challenging moment. Take us to what you consider to be your pivotal moment where your business went from stress to success.

So I think that my experience is kind of backwards. In that I experienced— I wholeheartedly believe that I experienced my adversity in order to create my business. So my business comes from my experience when I was— in 2009, I was in a car accident with my boyfriend at the time, and it was a fatal car accident for him. And that was easily the darkest point in my life, especially coming out of a relationship that was fruitful for me as an individual. He was a great, wonderful person and to be accredited for a lot of my relationship with God in that he got me back into church. So losing him was a very, very devastating blow for me. And then I followed that up with a very toxic relationship with another individual, basically because I was still brokenhearted after losing Jordan. I transitioned into a relationship where I accepted far less than I deserved. And that's really where my story comes from. That's what she is— Benita was birthed from. It was birthed from that hurt that I experienced and the strength I gained throughout the process of getting through it. So I think the challenging moment was— well, there were challenging moments when I was writing, kind of reliving those experiences and, you know, things that you think you're completely over and you realize, oh, there might be a little, some of that pain left, but you use that to push forward. So whereas I think for most people, you know, I think there's the 5-year challenge for most businesses, you're in the red for the first 5 years. I think I started my business when I was in the red, and I didn't even know that I was in training for what I was about to do.

That's an awesome story, man. Um, what I gained from that is that even in life's challenges, we're always on our journey, you know, no matter what. You may not realize it at the time, but you're, you're always in the midst of your journey where you're learning a lesson that's going to affect you. The seed is already planted. It's just a matter of you to sift away all the dirt and make sure that it's always getting some sun, and, and eventually you're going to be able to take advantage of the fruits. That— just understand that you're always on your journey, guys. And even though it may seem bad at the moment, even though things aren't going the way that you want it to go, even though there may be losses that you may explain at the moment is playing a role in your journey in life, take it as that. So we have the Fearless Five questions coming up. But before we jump all the way in that, we're going to take a timeout to thank our sponsors. This episode was brought to you by the Divine Adventures Collection, with the first book being Do You Know Who God Is? Divine is a little girl that loves talking to her grandpa and asking him questions. See what her grandpa has to say when Divine Divine asks him who God is. This children's book is an awesome gift idea for any child that you may have in your life. For your copy, just visit thedivineadventures.com. That's the divine adventures dot com. So, Bonita, are you prepared for the Fearless Five?

I think so.

Okay, what was holding you back from becoming an entrepreneur?

I was in my own way. I wasn't allowing myself to get off the launch pad.

What's the best advice you've ever received?

To trust in the gifts that God has given me.

The one book that changed my mindset was The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho. If you could recommend one book that opened your eyes, what would it be and why?

The Shack by William P. Young. It was a book that was given to me after my car accident, and it really put into perspective life and relationship with God. If you are a believer, I think that you should read it. I had an entire Bible study group read that book because I was that— I just believed in that much.

Name one app resource you use the most as an entrepreneur. Asana. Okay, this is the last question. Imagine you woke up one morning, except you are your younger self. You know, that 28-year-old that you, you know, previously stated. At that pivotal moment where you realize, you know, you wanted to be an entrepreneur, all the bills are paid, you have food and shelter, and you still have the knowledge that you have now. You have a laptop, you have all the experience of overcoming your fears thus far, and you have $400. What will you do in the next 10 days?

I guess first I would stop with the mentality that this isn't the right time or you're not prepared yet. I think that is another thing that a lot of people get caught up doing. We wait for the perfect time to do something, and I spent a lot of my early 20s waiting for the perfect time. So I would throw that mentality out of the window. I would do things that allowed me to get more experience. I don't know how far the $400 is going to take me, but I would travel. I would talk to people. I would gain wisdom and insight from other individuals all over the world. If I had the opportunity, I would do a mission trip. A lot of things like that. Just engage with people, engage with real life. I would use that time and those experiences to create more stories, to create more content to blog about, to create more works to write about, to create more books that can help people. And as an individual that creates self-help material, the more exposure that I have to different situations, cultures, and people, the more engagement that I have with the community, the better I am at giving advice, the more valuable my words become. And I would also do things that we all can do, like engage my social media accounts. I would document my journey and I would create marketable material that people could really find useful.

So, Bonita, let's end this killer interview with a piece of advice you'd like to give to the Fearless Family, the best way we can connect with you, and then we'll say goodbye.

I think the best advice that I can give is kind of my own personal mantra, what I live by. One, take care of the people who take care of you. Two, never miss an opportunity to be a blessing to someone else. And three, be relentless. Be relentless with your goals. Be relentless with your passion. Be relentless with your purpose. Don't ever let anybody tell you what you can't do. Don't let anybody else define what your future is or what your purpose is. You are the creator of your entire life. And as long as you understand the amount of control you have and you never let go of that control, with the exception to God, you will surprise yourself and how far you can go.

And how can people connect with you?

Several ways. So on Instagram, I am @she_is_bonita, B-O-N-I-T-A. You can also follow the She Is Bonita website, which is sheisbonita.com. You can also email me at sheisbonitablog@gmail.com. And finally, you can follow the Divine Adventures at thedivineadventures.com, the divine adventures dot com, and on the Divine Adventures Facebook page.

Awesome. So guys, it's a lot of them, but we'll make sure that we have all of that on, on our podcast page. You'll be able to see all the show notes and we'll make sure we have all the links. You guys can definitely go and support the book that's out right now. That's The Divine— and I mess this up every time— is D-I-V-I-N-E-T-H-E. D-I-V-I-N-E. You're gonna try to spell it with a D-E-V-I-N-E, but Divine isn't spelled with a D-E.

It's Divine spelled the correct way. Yeah, the right way, the English way.

So thedivineadventures.com. Benita, I want to thank you for sharing your journey with the Fearless Family today., and we look forward to seeing you continue to create with no fear.

Thank you so much for having me. I've had a blast.

Fearless family, thank you for joining me for another episode of the Fearless Entrepreneur Podcast. Take a moment to visit thefearless.co/podcast, like, share, and comment on our channel.