#26: Let’s Support Our Community with Guest, Cindy Witteman of Driving Single Parents

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We're Erika Radis and Marie Lifschultz, a San Antonio area realtor and lender, but most importantly, we're working moms.

The goal of this podcast is to provide support and a sense of community to San Antonio area working moms like us. So join us in trying to find a balance between career, family, and everything in between.

Welcome to this week's episode of the Working Moms of San Antonio podcast. We're here with Sydney Wideman, and she is the founder of a nonprofit called Driving Single Parents, as well as the host of a show called the Little Give TV show. And she's got a few other accolades as well. And so we're going to turn it over to her to kind of talk about all the cool stuff she's doing and you know, how she's getting out there.

Awesome. Well, thank you so much for having me on the show. I'm super excited. I'm, I'm from San Antonio. I love San Antonio, so I'm so grateful to be on this platform. Yeah, I, like I said, came from San Antonio, Texas. Like you said, I'm the founder and CEO of Driving Single Parents, where our mission is to give away cars to single parents who are not only in need but also very deserving of the vehicle. I'm also the host of Little Gift TV show, as she mentioned, and we really are on a quest to spread positivity and also showcase ordinary people doing extraordinary things to help others. I think it's so important because there's so much bad news out there these days that I really wanted a platform to where I could share with other people that there are a ton of amazing people in this world out there every single day doing amazing things to help others. So that's really my mission. I'm also a beekeeper, a published author. Uh, just lots going on all the time.

Yes. Yeah, it sounds like it. Good for you. Um, so yeah, let's talk a little bit about the Driving Single Parents, um, nonprofit. So how did you sort of get started, um, in that, and, and kind of what made you want to go that route?

Okay, so first and foremost, I'm a domestic violence survivor, um, which made me a single mom. You know, I was one of those people that never wanted to get divorced, wanted to stay in it for the kids forever. And once I realized that that was simply just not an option, I escaped that situation with a basket of clothes, a bag of diapers, and my daughters, and I went and built a new life for us. Was it easy? Absolutely not. It was hard. It was very, very hard. I worked 2 jobs. I put myself through college. I just really wanted to give them the life that I had planned to give them as a married couple, but wanted to do that, you know, of course, on my own. So as I went through that, you know, trying situations, once I got on the other side of it, I realized, man, you know, that was so, so hard for me. And there's so many everywhere I looked. There's, you know, single parents. You know, not all of them have chosen to be single parents. In fact, it could be an accident, it could be cancer, it could be suicide, it could be anything that makes them single parents. And it's not a choice. And there's such a stigma around it. So I wanted to do something to help My initial desire was to do childcare because it was my biggest hurdle. You can have all the drive in the world and want to work 2 jobs and put yourself through college, but without proper childcare, it is impossible. And daycares weren't open back then. They weren't open. There was no 24-hour daycares. So it would be relying on hiring a nanny or hiring a babysitter or paying a neighbor. It was constantly just a struggle every single day.. And I realized that even if I had, even though I had all the determination in the world, if I didn't have the support system that I had and things kind of hadn't fallen in the place that they had, I could easily have just, you know, been stuck in a cycle of, you know, government assistance and, and not been able to rise above. And so that was my initial desire, was to start a nonprofit for childcare. Well, I ran a poll here in San Antonio and unfortunately nobody could really get excited about donating to a nonprofit. Focused on childcare, which was shocking to me. But it turns out everybody assumes that it's all covered by government assistance. And I'm here to tell you that government assistance, there are some programs, but the funding is very limited. The waitlists are very long. You have to already have a job before you can qualify. There's so many loops. But again, what is a nonprofit that nobody's excited to donate to? Yeah, so I was devastated.

I was—

I couldn't make that happen. And I And it's still on my heart today, still something I intend to work on, and I'm still picking the pieces in my mind to make that work. So then I kind of went back to the drawing board and was like, well, what was my second need? What was it? And so I couldn't— it took me a while to decide. But I know I was at dinner with my then fiancé at the time, and I literally stood up in the middle of dinner and said, that's it. I'm going to give away cars to single parents. And my fiancé was like, He's a lawyer, so he's like, sit back down. You are not giving away any cars. That is a horrible liability issue.

No.

And so I listened to him very intently. And that night we went to bed. I woke up super early in the morning. I built a business plan, a website. By the time he woke up, I showed him everything I had done and he was like, okay, well, I guess we're doing this then. So now we've been giving cars to single parents for 6 years and we just changed the life of another single parent on July 8th.

So we're just out there doing it every day.

Oh my gosh, I just love that. That's amazing.

Sorry, you're right. Sorry. No, no, but you're right. Like, I would think if I— the biggest challenge as even a working mom, even with two parents in the household, daycare was a— is a challenge. It's a challenge to find childcare. So because right now most households need two incomes to, you know, so having childcare because you're working just to send your child to daycare because it's so expensive. And then the next one would be a vehicle. Because if you can't get to work, you know, what are you going to do? You know, rely— I mean, we have public transportation, but it's— I don't know if anybody's taken it. It's long. You're on the bus for a long period of time. A lot of people use Uber. I was actually speaking to a single father very recently, and he's struggling, actually does not have a vehicle. And he says he spends $300 to $400 a month just Ubering to work, like back and forth. And I couldn't believe that.

So, yes, I hear those stories all the time. Yeah, all the time of people in the rain, missing, losing jobs. That's a big one. You know, I'm so glad public transportation is there. It's very needed, but it is lacking in a lot of ways. And I talk to single parents all the time that say they've lost multiple jobs because the bus was late. Or it was raining that day and there was traffic. And so then they've already been on the bus for 2.5, 3 hours, and then they can't get there fast enough. And so they're late 2 times in a month, and then you lose your job, and then you're just back to square one.

Yeah.

Well, and San Antonio is not the smallest city. I mean, you can't walk really anywhere. You can't get to— it would be dangerous even to walk from my home to an H-E-B to get groceries. The roads aren't safe. There's not a lot of sidewalks and stuff like that. Walking to work is probably not feasible for most people in San Antonio because everything's so spread out.

Absolutely, 100%. And I think here in San Antonio, it's not a need, like, it's not like a want, like in some places. A vehicle here in San Antonio is a need. It is a very, very, very important need. Yeah, I remember back whenever I was a single mom working those two jobs and putting myself through college, I would get up in the morning, I would take my daughters this one to this school, this one to this babysitter, this one to this pre-K thing. And then on my lunch break, I'd get off, I'd drive over there, I'd get that one, take her to that babysitter. Then 3:00 comes, you got to go get the other one from that school and take her to that babysitter. So they're all 3 in one place. Then you get off work at that job, and then you go grab the kids again from that place, and then you got to take them to the next babysitter. Or I would take them to my house, and the babysitter would come to my house, and then I'd go from 6 to 10. To come home, to tuck the girls into bed, to go to my other job after they were already in bed asleep. So without that vehicle, impossible. Impossible. I cannot imagine trying to get a bus on my lunch break to go get my kid, to take her where she needs to go, or to get them to where they needed to be. It would just literally— it would have made my successful story unsuccessful if I hadn't had that car.

Right, right. Well, I'm just so curious about how, like, I guess the moving parts, like how it all works. Where do these vehicles come from and how do you decide who gets them and how does it work? I just want to know.

Yes, yes. And so it took me— I was very intent about this. Okay. So I think there's— people have different communication skills. So you can write down something on a piece of paper or an application and, you know, it could— for one person, it might come across perfect and then they might be different on the other side or they might be, you know, imperfect on the writing, but then perfect in person. So I really didn't want to limit it to people based on just their writing skills or just how they filled out the application. The application is very, very basic on the front end, and I wanted it that way because I wanted people to feel like comfortable to share just the basics that I needed. I don't need your driver's license number. I don't need any of that stuff. So I just need your name. I just need your name and where you live and your zip code. Make sure you live in Bexar County. Make sure you have the ability to obtain and maintain car insurance. Because although the car is free, Texas requires us all to have car insurance. So if you cannot afford car insurance, then unfortunately you can't qualify for the car. So just very basic things. You must have a driver's license. You must live— a Texas, a valid Texas driver's license. You must live in Bexar County, and you must have the ability to obtain and maintain car insurance, and you must be a single parent. Those are the qualifications. So basically they just give me the basics and answer yes, I have, yes, I am, to match those that criteria. And then they just kind of do a little quick outline of why they need the vehicle. After I verify they meet the minimum qualifications, I send them an email and let them know, hey, you're going to move on to the second step, which is to send us a video, a quick video, you know, about 3 minutes of you expressing your need and how a vehicle would change your current situations for the better. So once I received that, that video, we gather all the videos, make sure everybody meets the criteria, and then our board of directors— we have 12 individuals on our board of directors that actually vote on which person is actually going to receive the vehicle. Once we decide, once we narrow it down to those top 3, we will go and make sure we do the background checks to make sure we don't have somebody who's unfortunately got like a DWI or something like that that excludes them from the program. Because obviously we need to make sure these vehicles are going to go to a place that's going to help someone and, and not cause any additional issues for them or for, you know, driving single parents. We want to make sure these are really deserving people. So we do that, we vet individuals to make sure that their story checks out. We make sure, you know, they meet that criteria and not just saying they meet it, we verify. And then once we do that and they meet that final push and they're good to go, then we say, okay, well, they're going to be the recipient of the vehicle. As far as where the cars come from, there's a couple of ways. So we partner with different corporations, like we've partnered with Service King before. Carvana has partnered with us. We've had several different partners that actually work with us to help produce the vehicles. And the other option is we get donations from just individuals. You know, sometimes they give us a $5 donation, a $10. We are 100% volunteer-based. Everything goes back to— besides the, the CPA fee that we have to pay for our taxes every year.

Sure.

We're a 501, so we don't have taxes, but we still have to send in documentation. So we do have that small, small, small, small fee that is paid by the organization. But other than that, everything else goes 100% back into buying these cars for individuals.

Wow.

Yeah, it's incredible.

Yeah, and I think that's a great process. I mean, you— in a situation like this, you often wonder about the logistics, you know, and how that works. And it sounds like you guys are doing everything you can to protect the recipients, to protect yourself. I mean, I just think that you guys are doing it in a way that— I mean, it makes sense to me And I just think that's great. You're doing what you can to help the most people possible, it sounds like.

Yes.

And one of the big things that I'm really big about is the whole mission for this organization is not to give everybody a car, although we would all like a free car. I would like a free car too.

Sure.

But these cars go to very deserving single parents. For instance, the last car giveaway that we— the last car giveaway we just did was such a cool full circle moment. We had given a car to a lady who's on our board now who was a recipient. She's actually our vice president of philanthropy and she got herself into a better place once we gave her the car that we gave her and she joined our board and then she got herself into a better place and bought her own vehicle and then she donated the car back to Driving Single Parents.

Oh, how cool.

To bless another single parent. So this just goes to show you that the recipients, we have 4 recipients on our board of directors right now that give us incredible insight into the other side of the perspective of how it feels to be a recipient. And, you know, they have very, very awesome insight into the process. And so we love having them on the board. But those type of people, the type of people we give the cars to are already gonna be successful. The car, Kashmir, we just gave her the car on the 8th and she's been going to dental school. She wants to be a dentist for 7 years now trying and a single parent, taking those courses, getting the bus, getting across town, doing all of those things. So she was gonna be successful whether we gave her the car or not, We're just going to give that little extra push to get it there a little quicker. So these are driven individuals. We've had one graduate with their master's degree already. We have another one that became a special education teacher. We have several different recipients who have just gone above and beyond with the tool we provided them with.

Yeah, no, that's great. So you have all these success stories. I mean, then obviously you guys are doing well, and I just— but then you must have, you know, no doubt, right? What you're doing is the thing that you're supposed to be doing because look at all these people and look at how it's, you know, how positive it is. And I just love that. I think that's awesome.

Yes, so true.

Yeah. And then what about, let's talk a little bit now about Little Give TV show. So I want to know what the thoughts were behind that and how that got going.

Okay, so it's actually a crazy story. So although I had this great idea to start this nonprofit, I didn't realize that I have a fear of public speaking. Who would have thought? Me too. That was a little challenging with Driving Single Parents because then I was the founder. I'm the face of the organization. I had to speak to people. I had to do those news interviews. I had to do all that. But I did it only when I absolutely had to. So when I was offered the opportunity to host this TV show, I was like, oh no, there is no way. No way I'm going to sign up for that willingly. I have this fear of public speaking and I'm going to be critiquing myself. I'm going to be worried. I'm going to be stressed. Like, I don't do that. I'm not doing it. But it just kept coming back to me and coming back to me. They're like, okay, well, what if we let you choose the show that you're going to have, the name of it, who your guests are going to be, and what it's going to be about? Would you do it then? So basically, these people, they removed— She Rises Studios removed all obstacles. So I had no choice but to say yes and do it afraid. And I did. And I've been doing it now for quite some time. I've recorded probably about 40 episodes, but 20 2020 will be airing this coming Sunday. So just one of those things where in my life I've realized that, you know, sometimes it does take that little push, a little step outside the box to do something wonderful to help other people. And so I've learned over time that my mission really is giving back and helping other people, and it's really what sets my soul on fire. And so, um, once I sat down, I was like, okay, well, if I was going to do a TV show, what would it be about? Really, obviously, it would be about positivity, about sharing that there's ordinary people out there doing extraordinary things to help others every single day. I just, I feel like there's so much bad news out there that I really wanted the platform to really showcase these people who are all over the world, not just here in San Antonio, not just the United States, all over the world, who are out there every day going above and beyond to help others. Sharing positivity, spreading kindness. And so that's essentially what the show is about, and that's what I've done. And it has really filled my heart with so much joy. So I'm grateful I did it afraid, and I did it even though I didn't want to, because it was all for a purpose.

Well, you're right, because I mean, everywhere you look, you hear negative news, you know. That's what kind of gets the ratings up, you know, or negative stuff going on, because they're like, what's happening? Who's doing this? You know. But it's, it's refreshing to see something that's positive and gives you a little bit of hope You know, that there are a lot of good people out there and we just don't get to see it because, you know, social media and, you know, the news, it's not the most popular story out there to always share.

Bad news sells. Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

Bad news sells. Yeah, that's true. Oh, but I love that. I love just the idea of spreading positivity. I'm all about sort of putting positive energy out into the world. And so, yeah, I mean, I just, I think that's great. The more of that, the better, in my opinion.

Yes. And that's why I named it Little Give, because I feel like the big give feels like everybody else's problem. But a little give each of us can do every single day. It doesn't take a $10,000 donation to a nonprofit to do that little give. It doesn't take a week of your, your month to do a little, to do a little give. You could really just do anything. Smile. Yesterday I went to the grocery store and this lady was holding a baby and and all of her groceries splattered all over the floor. And she was there trying to pick up the baby in 105-degree temperature, trying to pick up the groceries in this heat. So I ran over and helped her real quick. And it wasn't to get any recognition. It was because it's just kindness. I mean, it's just something we all have.

Yeah.

And it's that little give we can all— each of us can give every day.

Yeah, definitely. And I love that you did it scared, right? So like this year, 2023 is supposed to be my year of like doing things that make me like wildly uncomfortable. And so even just like what we're doing right now, like I'm afraid of public speaking as well. I'm afraid to like be recorded. I'm constantly like a perfectionist type person where it's like, oh my gosh, did you really say that? Like, you look crazy. And so it's just one of those things that, but I have found in just doing this and we are on our 23rd episode, I think. Oh my goodness, great. I know. Yeah. That like, A ton of extraordinary things have come from just even doing this, which, you know, we like to get out there, you know, and do that kind of thing and really highlight other people's businesses. But I have learned about so many different people. I've learned what everybody's doing and it's just, it's all really amazing stuff. And like their stories are amazing and it's just been really fulfilling at the end. And so if you had said to me a little while ago, would I be doing this just like you? I would've said no. Nope, that'll never happen.

But you know, Cindy, I think that's probably the biggest tip that you could have probably shared with our listeners today was do it scared. You know, I mean, just, you can do anything. I always tell my kids, you can do anything hard for a little while. Like, okay, if you know what I'm going to do, I'm going to do one episode and then maybe I can do one more. And then, and eventually, eventually the scared me turns into, you know, confidence, hopefully at one point or another. But you can always do it scared. So I think that's a great tip for a lot of people out there. Like, hey, if you're thinking of doing something, give it a try. I know it's scary, but do it, you know, do it anyways.

Yes, a lot of positive things. That's something that I've had to do is really just a lot of things, just do it afraid. You know, I found that some of the most beautiful things that have happened in my life have happened because I've done it afraid. You know, it seems like, you know, you push past that little bit of fear and you open the first door and then you see a hallway full of all of these open doors. And it really, really is empowering. And it is like, oh, wait, I could do this. Okay, well, if I could do this, what else can I do?

Exactly.

It really is. It gets you kind of feeling like, wow, I can't believe that I'm accomplishing this. And then you're like, okay, well, if I could do that, what else can I do? And then also talking to other people and other people go through their struggles, their challenges throughout the day or throughout the week or the month or year. And, you know, you can be that positive push to them to like, hey, look, you know, I came from very poor beginnings, I should say. You know, sometimes we didn't have running water or electricity. Sometimes we didn't have food. Sometimes I would have to wash my clothes in the bathroom sink at school because we didn't have a washer or dryer. We didn't have transportation for most of my childhood. There were so many things that I did without that kept me in this, like, self-limiting belief, you know, like, I'm nobody, who am I? I had all of these, the self-doubt, you know, and fear. And really, my whole thing in life was to kind of hide, you know, if I just hide and stayed out of the way, nobody will see me, I'm good. And then I don't have to experience any of the hardships or the setbacks. And so that's what I did for a lot of my life, including I was the high school mascot, like, how perfect is that? My friends wanted me to be a cheerleader. I was like, oh no, but the mascot, I could put the mask on and nobody will even know it's me. And I can just be silly and goofy. And it was perfect for me. But coming from all of that and then realizing that, like, wait a second, you know, I could do this, I could do that. There's so many things that I'm capable of that I never would have known if I hadn't just done it afraid and tried and done it scared. Like you said, journaling, writing it down has really been something huge for me where I can get an idea and I can start writing it down. And then I really have been able to see it in my mind and then hold it in my hand and, and accomplish a lot of great things. And I think anybody can do that.

I think putting it on paper, ink to paper, makes it real, makes it a commitment of some sort, you know. So people seen as a— it goes back to a lot of people have done like vision boards when they can see it and then, you know, hopefully comes fruition. You're able to do more. So yeah, I do a lot of journaling. So when I think of something, I write it down. I'm a big list person, but I like to journal as well.

Yeah.

Um, any thoughts I have. So if it doesn't happen today, it might— I can go back and read notes and see, hey, I had this idea 2 months ago, maybe, you know, it's something that worked today, or 2 years ago. So yeah, I found that my sub—

I found that my subconscious kind of puts the pieces together. Like, I might write down like 6 different things, you know, 3 weeks ago, and then all of a sudden today the last missing piece will just pop up and I put that and I'm like, oh, this can go with that and this, oh, that solved that problem. And it really, I don't know what it is. And like you said, it's probably, you know, you put it to paper, which means it's like, it's reality, you know? And I noticed that the way I think things in my mind, it comes out different on paper, more organized, I guess you would say. So I found that that's been super helpful for me.

Yeah, that's a great tip. I mean, that's a great tip for anybody really in any aspect of their life, I think.

Yeah.

So that's good. Absolutely. Write it down. Yeah.

Yeah.

Write that stuff down, you guys.

Yeah.

Because your brain is trained. Your brain is trained to figure out what's important to you and what's not. So you might have a really great idea, but if you don't do anything with it, your brain's like, oh, that was useless and kicks it out. And then you're like, what was I thinking about? And then now you can't remember what your great idea was. But if you put it, if you write it down,, then you could take action.

Absolutely. Yeah, that's great. Well, we always ask our guests what their favorite thing is about what they're doing. I imagine you probably have several favorite things, but we like to ask. I really do.

I do. I have so many favorite things. One, I just want to say that helping others is just like such a fulfilling thing for me. I don't know why it is, but it's something, just that feeling of being able to do something to help someone, even if it's just a tip on what's good at HEB. I just really love to help people. So everything I do in my, my life, my business, is all focused around helping others. Everything I do. And so that's my favorite part, is helping others.

Yeah, that's great. And I think that's very apparent in all the things that you're doing.

Yes.

Um, so that's excellent. Um, and then lastly, do you want to just let our listeners know how they can sort of learn more about Driving Single Parents and also maybe, um, The Little Give TV show as well.

Absolutely. So for, for Driving Single Parents, you can easily visit us at drivingsingleparents.org. Like I said earlier, we're a 501 nonprofit. You can go to the website, you can find out all the details there. If you need to apply or you know somebody who might be interested, you can share that information. If you want to go and make a donation, that's very, very helpful. Every dollar will go back to Bexar County citizens. We only focus on Bexar County. At this time, so to go right back into San Antonio and Bexar County and surrounding areas. So that would be awesome. You can also email us at info@drivingsingleparents.org. If you want to know more about our TV show, the best place to find it is at littlegive.com. You can also go and download Phoenix TV on Roku, Apple TV, or Fire Stick, or you can just watch it from your computer on phoenixtv.com. So, or phoenix. Phoenix.app. Phoenix.app. I'm so sorry.

Oh no, that's okay.

Those are all the ways to get it. If you want to email me directly, you can email me at Cindy@littlegive.com.

Perfect.

Perfect.

And we will put some of that information in our show notes to make it easier for the listeners to kind of click around and, and get to you guys. So, so I just want to thank you, Cindy, so much for being on the show. I've loved learning about all the different things that you're doing. And I know that you are just helping our community so much, and I just think that's amazing. So thank you for being here.

Of course. I have one more thing I'd like to say, if possible.

Oh, sure.

Yeah, go ahead. Please do. Please do.

For the show, we actually have a segment called Kindness Clips, and it's really just anybody can just do a quick video of themselves saying, talking about a time that maybe they helped someone or maybe somebody helped them. And then we showcase that on the show in our Kindness Clips segment. So if you are interested in doing that, just send those videos to me at cindy@littlegive.com.

Oh, I love that.

Yeah, that's so nice.

Spreading kindness clips.

Yeah, that's great. Cool.

Okay, and then I just want to also thank our listeners for tuning in to this week's episode of the Working Moms of San Antonio podcast, and we will just catch you guys next week.

Bye, thank you so much. I appreciate y'all.

Thanks so much for tuning in to the Working Moms of San Antonio podcast. Be sure to follow us on social media at our respective Instagram accounts or join our Working Moms of San Antonio Facebook group. Those links can be found in our episode description. If you have an episode topic suggestion or question, please email us at office@radisagent.com and be sure to subscribe subscribe to the podcast and leave us a review. See you next week.