A Success Equation: Courage + Fear Utilization with Brad Axelrad

Welcome to the Conscious Pivot Podcast with international speaker, business mentor, best selling author of Pivot, and your host, Adam Markell. The Conscious Pivot shares the stories and wisdom of people who have successfully reinvented some area of their business and personal life. You'll gain powerful insights into how you can fully embrace new opportunities, increase your performance, and master the art and science of innovation and resilience. So please join Adam as he guides you on your Conscious Pivot.

Hey, everybody. Welcome to the Conscious Pivot Podcast. I'm thrilled, as always, to be with you today. And I'm also thrilled to be able to share somebody who's, you know, a great leader in the world in so many ways. And he and I, we have the same barber. So that's why I really love this guy. Not just because he's a great leader in the world. By that, I mean he models. He models. Every time I'm in his presence, I feel good. That's how I track things. How does somebody make me feel in their presence? And this guy always makes me feel good about just being. I mean, he's a strong, strong guy, but I never feel intimidated by his strength. I hope that's the way people perceive me as well. And in any event, I really have just affinity for him and he's doing great things. He's helping a lot of people break through fear. I think it's probably the. If there's one thing that really debilitates people, I don't say people debilitates all of us, it is fear. My own personal belief system is that there are two things we're going through and experiencing morning, noon, and night, every day of our lives, either love or fear. And so much of what we are challenged by sits in that channel of fear. And the things that have us loving life, loving our lives, and just feeling purposeful is love. So, you know. Brad Axelrod, thank you so much for being a part of our Conscious Pivot discussion for today. And if you wouldn't mind, and our community is used to this, will you share something about yourself instead of me introducing you? Okay.

I love that. Thanks for having me. I'm honored and grateful and humbled and. Yeah, it's awesome. Let's see. About Me Geez. In personal development, that path started from massive pain when my dad passed in 2005. I know you know that one. And we talked about that when you were on the Face youe Dragon podcast. But, you know, I was the Orange County Hoffman graduate facilitator for a couple years, and I wanted to sort of create a way to be in higher service. So I started a book study group. That book study group into. Grew into 200 live events with some of the biggest thought and business leaders on the planet.

That's what you mean, right?

Yeah. The Hoffman Institute. Right.

Beautiful.

Yeah, it's amazing. It's brilliant work. And you know, I wanted to be in that conversation and other conversations. So I started just a. Just a small group that morphed into hundreds of live events with thousands of people attending. And within eight weeks of the first meeting of studying the law of attraction and quantum physics and anything that came to mind, we were on NBC Nightly News and the rest is history. PBS television, in front of 8 million people. USC News, LA Times, Orange county, reddish, like attracted all this media and got on this fun train of transformation. Boom. I'm thrusted into the marketplace as an expert. So that's the short answer getting thrown.

Into the deep end, right?

100%.

And you're working on yourself all the while. So it probably was pretty trippy to just sort of be seen in that. Using that word. I don't know if you dig this word or not dig this word. I don't particularly care for the word guru. But you get seen as somebody that has expertise and sort of guru esque and you go, but you don't understand. I'm a complete fuck up. Do you not know that? Right?

Yeah. What's so interesting about that? Can I speak to that? Because I would. You know Greg Moores, right? Greg Montana. And Greg was. Greg was on my board of advisors. And he was the guy that got me to finally slow the fuck down. He said, Brad, when are you gonna finally sit in your shit? That's what he said. And I know this was 10 years ago and you're right and there was a reason I brought him up and now I just completely forgot. But Greg is. Greg is amazing. I'll stop there. I just forgot what I was gonna say about Greg.

Well, it's just the idea that you're working on yourself. And it's so funny because I was just reading something. I have a book that helps to guide my spiritual practice. It's around the year with Emmet Fox. So absolutely adore this book and section for today was talking about how always metaphysical in nature, power of prayer to overcome obstacles and all that kind of thing. But then it also said something around not waiting until we're worthy to actually be doing the work, doing the great things. Because if you're waiting to be worthy, you know, the day will never come. You don't give yourself worthiness. I mean, according to, you know, Emmett, it comes. It comes from source. Right? So you have. But you have to ask for it, and you pray for it, and when you ask for it, it's given. Right. So you're just, you know, to wait until you're. You're rich and famous to be able to teach people or mentor them in some area. Well, you can wait forever, and usually people do, versus, like, you know, the experience you're talking about where you get thrown in the deep end. And even though you're still processing through and working with, you know, your own stuff, sitting, as Greg said, sitting in your own shit, and yet still you. You have the ability to use that to impact lives, to help change lives, to create, you know, for us, we were driven to create peace. So, you know.

Yeah.

Does it mean you're peaceful all the time just because your mission is to create peace? No, it means more time than not. You're not in peace for sure. You know, you're seeking it. So, yeah, I'd love to know a little bit more about the path you've taken and the pivots along the way. And I know that's what really jazzes up our folks is to see how the person who's had great success has, you know, had those pivotal moments and what they've learned and even, you know, sort of where it's led you today.

Yeah. So one of the. One of the pivots, and I just remembered what I was going to share about Greg is, you know, Greg spoke at the center numerous times, and I would stand in front of this audience of, say, 200 people at times, and I would. I would honestly come clean about where I was. I'd be like, look, guys, I'm standing in front of you. I'm nervous and scared as to shit. I have no idea what I'm doing. God's working through me. I have no idea why I'm here. But evidently, we're all supposed to be here, right? You know, like, you guys get what I'm saying? Yes. Okay, cool. Can you. Can you work with me if I'm a little nervous? Yes. So you're right. Jumping into the deep end, not having the answer. And that was one of my biggest pivots, was just saying yes, even though I had no flipping idea what I was doing. I mean, literally when I started these groups, I had never been a speaker. I mean, I'd been in sales for many years at some level. But pivoting from having A real estate successful real estate investment and real estate finance company in Orange County, California, to pivoting to becoming thought leader guy. Now granted, at that point I had already probably attended and attended maybe 30 workshops and seminars, Hoffman and stuff. So that was another big pivot, right? Attending and actually doing the work, doing the inner work, not the outer work. That was one of the biggest pivots of my life. Saying yes to this calling yes to my purpose. I remember wailing in the hallway of my condo after my dad died in serious grief, just begging the universe to have my purpose show up. I had no idea what it was. I just knew that self indulgence wasn't serving me anymore. I knew that drugs and alcohol and food and travel and BMWs and motorcycles and purchasing homes like it didn't serve me anymore. So there was this kind of, what's the word I'm looking for? Not diversion, not conversion, divergence, what's the term? There was a paradox happening as I'm being pulled in both directions. I'm opening one and shedding an old life. That was the biggest pivot, was saying yes to my highest calling, yes to my voice, even if my voice. I didn't have my voice yet. I didn't know my voice. I didn't know my message. I didn't. I didn't know myself at that level yet. But I said yes anyway. And that's really what you were alluding to earlier, right? It's stepping in and just fuck it, I'm in. Right? There's that moment of saying yes and I did. And that's been the biggest blessing of my life. I'm in Costa Rica now. I live here part time. I'm in two months buying a world class Mercedes Sprinter RV to travel the US and Canada. Like so another just pivots all over the place. That's where the juice is.

Yeah. What are you going to do in the Sprinter?

Yeah, it's a little bigger than a Sprinter. It's a sprinter van with the big conversion on the back. Like it's really cool. But I'll buy it in Texas. The plans to buy it in Texas, go to Boulder, visit friends there, go up to Canada, visit friends in Calgary and then head over to Vancouver and then down to the Hoffman Institute for another leadership seminar there. I love that, you know, the Hoffman Institute and then over to Burning Man. Straight from Hoffman to Burning man in this rv, ready to rock. Like that's, that's the plan. That's the initial plan. And I'm going to visit friends and Ojai and Boulder, all these spiritual communities, and do a deep drop in. I've noticed that one week or two weeks in a place isn't enough. But staying somewhere as long as it feels good is what I'm really learning to do. And then when it sort of feels time to move, move on. And that's where the RV creates. And it'll be one of my homes. That's not my only home. That's the second home. I'll be living here and in Costa Rica and other places, too.

Yeah. So give me a sense of the pivotal experiences you've had. Have they taught you anything? Is there a, you know, sort of a common denominator that you can detect?

Well, yes, there's a theme, there's a thread, there's a. We talked about this. I shared when you were on the Face of Dragon podcast. But the feather, the brick, or the Mack truck? If you ignore the feather, the brick comes, the Mack truck comes. So I've so many times ignored the feather, and that's the theme. Just my sheer stubbornness and strong will is the theme. And then something comes and just slaps me and says, no, dude, you need to listen. You're not listening. Slow down. You know, and that's. That's the theme has been. I mean, broken collarbones. I'm an ex, almost professional motocross racer. I traveled the west coast racing motocross, extreme sports guy, you know, I've chased many highs at all different levels with all different sorts of drugs and travel and plant medicine, and anything I can do to expand on this earthly plane and become a better messenger, I'm willing to try it. So the common theme is pushing the envelope and finding the edge. Like, there's that masculine core in us men and women as well, but mostly men, to push the edge, to find that level of edge. And that's when I feel most alive. And that's also when I'm not pushing the edge. When I'm in what Gay Hendricks calls your zone of competence or your zone of excellence. That's when I tend to manifest some smack upside the head, like, dude, wake up and listen. You're not listening, you know?

Yeah, yeah, that's. That's interesting. And the. Wake up, you know. Are you familiar with Michael Brown's work? Do you ever check out Process? Yeah, I recommend that one. You'll love it, especially, you know, with the work you've already done. He talks about things as being requirements. And this is nice. This has got me, boy. It's got me good, actually. Because everything that's. Everything that's happening according to him. And I'm ascribing to this, this feels, really feels true for me, that everything that's happening is not just happening for a reason. As I've said to a lot of people over the years, it's happening for a reason. That reason is there to serve, which I do believe it's there to serve us and our family and the world, etc. Depending on your voice, depending on your vision and your mission. Um, but it's also there because it's required to be there. So.

That's so good.

Yeah.

Ooh, that hit me, man. That really hit me. The requirements. Ooh, that is deep. Right in my gut, brother. That's. Wow, that is spot on.

I got chicken skin myself.

Yeah.

So, yeah, yeah.

So it's a requirement. Everything is always happening for us, as you said. It's never, never against us. Do we live in a friendly or a hostile universe? Wayne Dyer. I love, I love that.

Yeah.

It's a choice. It's a choice. I'm choosing. As ugly as these shadows can be, and as ugly as the dragon can be at facing us and burning us and, you know, threatening us, like, like when we learn to love our shadow, we can integrate these requirements and these. What did Beckwith say at ATL or not our calling? He named it something else, remember? What did he name it? Our assignment.

Flores. Well, so it was interesting because there was a theme going on at ATL because, yes, Michael was talking about the assignment. What is my assignment? In fact, I woke up this morning and that was one of the first things. I lied in bed and I went through some of my own morning practice, and then I asked that question, what is my assignment? So, yeah, what a phenomenal question that Fernando Flores, later in the event, said, you know, what is. What is my historical offering? What is our historical. Which is so powerful. Right.

Like, there's part of me that's. That's not an over overly a stickler with language. There's a lot of folks in our space who are, you know, really, really committed to language being everything. It creates everything. It's everything. And I've taken another stand on that. But I think, you know, well, language creates whatever you think it does, which I believe in quantum physics at that level. If I believe that, that me saying maybe or I'll try is a positive thing, so be it. But I mean, I get the power language. I just challenge a lot of the doctrine that can happen sometimes in our communities. I think it's easy. The ego likes to cling on to some of these. So I hold all these things loosely. Astrology loosely, human design loosely, Myers Briggs loosely. There's tendencies in every philosophy or teaching, and I appreciate that, but, boy, when the ego gets clung on, I just, you know, I want to check that, you know.

Yeah. It's like, you know, again, resisting absolutes on some. On some level, the absolutes are all around us because people crave. We all crave security. And this security, the safety in absolutes. Right. In blacks and whites.

And yes.

And you're right, the word integration is a big one because to be able to integrate these things means, again, I'm sort of speaking Michael Brown's language out because it's meaningful to me right now. It's not about healing. I say something that's sort of sacrilegious in this community, and I'll say it more.

I love it. I want to hear it.

What are we healing from? What is the need for a healer? What? We're not broken. We're not busted. You know, there's just. There's stuff that we need to deal with, and it's. It's our stuff. It's. And as Michael would say, it's required stuff. No. So how do we integrate it? Not make it wrong or bad and have to be away from it or heal it or somehow do something or anesthetize it or sedate it or avoid it or control it. Right. But just integrate it. And that's as far as I've gotten on that path, is just to be aware that that's a possibility.

Nice. So I appreciate your coming clean about that.

Right.

It's like you're not there yet. You know, we never really get there. We're always peeling layers back. Right. I'm with you on the integration. Forgive me if I keep looking out into the jungle. I'm only here another less than 12 hours, so I'm taking this in a little bit as we're. As we're talking, but the integration piece is key. A lot of folks in the conquer your fear space are all about that. Slayer, dragon, conquer your fear. I don't believe in that. I think it's a matter of integrating it and using your fear. I think fear is excitement without the breath. The founder of Gestalt therapy. There's power in recognizing that these chemicals that are happening are happening for us, not against us. Back to that friendly or hostile universe thing. If we can just breathe a little bit and notice, like, I was excited and nervous to get on this with you, it's great. I just interviewed my dear friend Jason Goldberg earlier. Prison Break is his book. Really cool stuff. Well, you know Jason. He actually mentioned that. You know him. Of course you do. But, Jason, how did I lose my train of thought two times? I don't lose my train of thought. What the fuck was I just thinking?

It's a breath. It's a moment for a breath.

It's a breath. Fear is excitement without the breath. Oh, my gosh. Okay. But we were simply talking about how you can use this. Oh, it was this. He said, brad, can I put us on Facebook Live right now when we're doing this recording? And I thought, whoa, scared as shit. No. My first thought was, absolutely not. We're going to edit. I'm going to edit this. It's going to be perfect. It'll come out as an edited, high quality product post. Edit.

Right, right.

And I said, go for it, dude. I'm nervous about this. And that's exactly why we should do it. And I'll tell you what, that nervous excitement that was there was one of the best conversations I've had on the Face youe Dragon podcast. Because I was juiced up from that little bit of fear and excitement that happened, and I had to just breathe it through and, you know, really use it and channel it. But, boy, I was a no. I was an absolute no.

You know what I'm going to do? This is classic.

Fire it up. It's a brilliant idea, dude.

Fire it up right now.

Have you thought to do that before? I've never thought to do it.

No. No, I never have.

It's just brilliant.

Oh, here we go. Sweet. Hey, everybody. This is a moment here. I'm actually sitting in the office and having an incredible conversation with a dear friend. We're officially, I guess, in business mode because we're podcasting. And so this is an actual official recording. And Brad is telling me about this other podcast he was on with a dude who was telling him, you know, I'm going to get on Facebook Live right now and we're just gonna go for it, you know? And he's like, well, no, no, no, don't do that. Don't do that. You know, we'll have the podcast. Gonna be all perfect. Actually, you know what? I don't even want to say this story. Brad, you ready to share this?

Yeah, I will. You bet. So, yeah, you can point that at me. There you go. So I was interviewing Jason Goldberg on the Face youe Dragon podcast, and he said, hey, I do this Sometimes I'll stream Facebook Live as I'm on an interview. And my first gut response and fear response was, no way. No way I'm going to edit this thing after. It's going to be perfect. And then I thought, no, it's exactly why I should do it. I'm afraid and I'm excited that energy can be used to our advantage. So I said, do it and we did it. And like I told him right before we started the podcast interview that I was at a level 14, like, I was pumped. And it went so well because I said yes to the fear, yes to the nervousness, yes to the excitement and integrated it and used it.

Yeah, exactly. So just. Just to bring this full circle, we're having a discussion about what does it mean to slay your dragon? What does it mean to simply step in, step into something that's uncomfortable and make it a yes right in that moment and realize, you know, on some level you're not defined, you know, you're not going to die. Nobody's. If this Facebook went horribly wrong, which it may be going horribly wrong, nobody's going to die. Yeah, that's the beauty.

Well, we have that.

Brad's not going anyplace.

We have that fight, flight or freeze response. You know, it's just so, so normal for us to be in survival mode. That lizard brain aspect of us is constantly in survival mode. So if we can recognize that stimulus and response, that gap between fear and action, or fear and non action, or fear and running the other way, whatever it is, that's the gap that the beauty, the presence lies in choice. That, that split second between stimulus and response. So mind the gap. I say stand in the gap. Be in the gap. That's really where, where love is. That's where everything is.

Yeah. And the distinction between fear and excitement is a breath.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's so true. And I. Every time I'm about to interview someone on my podcast or get on somebody else's, which happens regularly, it's like, oh, my gosh, what am I going to say? Am I going to say the right thing? And one of the tenets of the Face youe Dragon brand is, you know, the imposter syndrome. Will you be found out as an imposter fraud? That's the reason you don't go out and share your message, because you're afraid you're going to be an imposter fraud. You don't have all the answers. Right?

So why don't we both declare this? So I'm going to Put. Put us both to this. You ready? We're going to both declare, right? Our dirty little secret. You ready? I'll go first.

Yeah, you go first. Dude.

You want to jump off the cliff with me? All right.

Okay. All right.

So you're in Costa Rica.

I know.

You got these beautiful waterfalls and all these great places, right? I'm just in dreary old San Diego. Right.

No, it's horrible. You poor guy.

All right, so my dirty little secret is that I'm an imposter. I'm a total fraud.

Yeah. Interesting. That's yours, huh?

Oh, I'm picking up where we left off, buddy. I mean, think about it. Is there anybody that does not harbor the limiting belief that they will be found out as an imposter or a fraud? I mean, for sure. You know, I started. I was a practiced law for 18 years, man. I went into court and I had to, you know, handle things and did things for the first time. You know, surgeons, they operate, they cut people open for the very first time. You know, I mean, I think this is the thing that is liberating. That's why I'm. That's why I'm going for it. Because to me, you know, to the extent that we convince people, or worse yet, that we convince ourselves, that our ego convinces ourselves that we're so. That we're so together, we're competent, or we're an expert, quote, unquote, it's BS at its highest. So anyway, I'm going to put my hand up and go, you know what? That's my dirty little secret.

That's pretty dirty. I love it. Thank you. I would say mine. My most recent discovery, which is something that's been a common theme or thread throughout my entire life and relationship, whether it be business, relationship, love, relationship, friendship, relationship is codependency. And that's been really, really hard to face that dragon of codependency and actually say that I had traits of codependency. Now, that shows up in the codependency triad or triangle, right? The savior or hero, the victim and the perpetrator. So I've seen myself go in and out of all of these three Personas, being confused when I'm helping someone. Like, can't you see all the. Like, I'm almost about to cry right now. But can't you see all the time and effort I'm putting into you? Like. Like, this feels like such core wounding to me. And I see it in so many friends and relatives now. And it's like, can't you See all this effort I'm putting into you, and then I play victim, like, what the fuck I'm putting all this energy into? Don't you see that? And then I step into perpetrator saying, man, what? You know, like we just roll in and everyone's doing it at some level, just some worse than others. Right.

It shows up as that passive aggressive behavior.

Right, Exactly. That's exactly what happens. Yeah. So I'm feeling a lot of, like, nervousness. Like, this is the most public I've really shared. I mean, I shared it on Facebook, but never, never at this level live, like we're doing in it. Because I feel this sensitivity and trigger in myself. I know that this is something that I'm. That's really going to set me free. So what we say at Face youe Dragon is face your dragon, take the leap and break free. So what you're most resisting and most afraid of are the very things that will set you free. They're your money maker. They're your gift to humanity. They're your message. So. So this might be a big part of my core message is codependency.

Yeah, good. So that. That's when we. We're putting it into that dirty little secret. Because for one thing, it takes it just to say it, just to energetically release it. It takes the charge off. So I'm going to invite folks that are watching this if you feel inclined. You know, maybe your dirty little secret is that you. That you keep your, you know, you keep your love to yourself or you keep your love just to sort of the people that are closest to you. That it would be unusual for you to walk up to a total stranger and give them a hug or ask them if they can. You could give them a hug or tell them that you love them, even though you don't even know them, but you know them. Right. We get that. We all know each other. Right? So whatever your dirty little secret is, if you want to energetically just release the charge of that. This has been inspired, you know, complete, in a really organic way right out of a live podcast. That, of course, is not a live podcast because it gets, you know, engineered and, you know, edited and all that kind of thing. But we were just, you know, we were having this discussion about what it is to face your dragon, what it is to pivot, to be able to make a pivot instantly. Because that's the way it works, right? It goes like that. We make a decision and our life can change. Oh, yeah. Yeah, brother. So whatever you want to Maybe challenge in yourself today. Challenge a fear challenge. Something that you just want to be more truthful, just want to step out and be honest. Own your shit.

That's what we're talking about.

I'm working on myself. I'm a work in progress. I'm embodying the pivot as I teach it. And so if that. That makes me, you know, that makes me inauthentic or fraud or what I.

Say earlier, that imposter.

That I'm an imposter, so be it.

Yeah, dude, it makes you human. Thank you for being human. I'm so appreciating your humanity. Not everybody's playing that they're going to be playing in this perfection game. I talked about that on last week's podcast that we try to. There's a paradox in perfect. You know, everything's perfect in the spiritual communities. It's perfect as is, like we were talking about before. But there's also this desire to be perfect and all the imperfections that we have, and it's really just about embracing all of it. The good, the bad, the ugly. It's all fucking great. Just own it all. Stop resisting it all.

Exactly. Wow.

Beautiful.

And I think the message there is fuck perfect.

Perfect dot com. That's a good domain, you're a friend.

Of ours would say. All right, listen, love you guys. Have a beautiful and a blessed day and absolutely feel free to comment below with any of those moments, those courageous moments that you might have today where you're facing your dragon, where you're going to create a pivotal moment for yourself of truth and honesty, just something that you can feel good about, feel good in your heart that you showed up. So we love you, Brad. Au revoir from Costa Rica.

Blessings. Buenos tardes. Buenos tardes.

Are we gonna finish up our podcast? All right.

Sounds awesome.

Well, there you go.

Well done, buddy. You had a moment of inspiration and you followed it well, you know what?

Only because the space was created for that. So I want to thank you for allowing and giving and everything. Awesome. I think that's where we're going to call it. Perfect place to call it. You're on your way to new digs and before I close out the official podcast, where can people go to find use if they wanted to visit you and learn more about Face youe Dragon and your podcast and all that kind of thing? Where do they go?

Yeah. Couragequiz.com is a one minute quiz to help you discover the number one hidden fear stopping you from earning what you're worth. So there's we all have one main core thing and you're going to discover that in this one minute quiz. Couragequiz.com and then of course, just faceyourdragon.com all the podcasts are listed on there. Got the likes of Don Miguel Ruiz, the Four Agreements, Gay Hendricks, lots of other world class folks, you know, folks who have been on Conan o', Brien. Adam's coming out in two weeks. Coot Blackson just did Coot Blackson yesterday. I mean, just some of my favorite amazing humans, you know, Barnett Bain, just such incredible humans. Just beautiful, beautiful humans right there playing a big game and their hearts just like generous like here's my generosity, you know.

Yeah, yeah, way cool. And definitely send me and you will the links and things so we can promote that. Yeah, let folks know about that for.

Sure about the show.

All right, well, ciao, brother and peace and safe travels. And I know I'll be seeing it in ATL soon enough, so won't be long. All right, I'm gonna hit the button here. Okay, everybody, have a beautiful and a blessed rest of your day. And of course, when you wake up tomorrow morning, the reminder is always the same. Awake. Be in gratitude and declare for yourself that you love your life. All right, tomorrow and every day after that. I love you. Ciao for now.

Thanks for listening, everyone. We hope you now have the tools and greater insights to navigate your own Pivot. Help us inspire others by sharing this episode and leaving your comments over@adammarkel.com podcasts for more tips, strategies and support as you consciously pivot into a new business and lifestyle you love, join our Pivot community on facebook@pivotfb.com.