Hypnosis: Experiencing The Expansive Powers Of The Mind With Rick Paddock

Interview on the Conscious Pivot Podcast (host Adam Markel) with Rick Paddock, hypnotist and founder of Mid America Hypnosis/Milwaukee Hypnosis & Wellness Center. Paddock traces his path from coaching and house-flipping to clinical hypnosis, explains hypnosis as a goal-oriented, trance-like (not sleep) state with induction → deepener → suggestions → awakening, and surveys its history (mesmer, Coué, Elman, Erickson). He frames "mind flipping" as mental renovation (like flipping houses), explains habits as hypnotic patterns formed via TAR (Trauma, Authority, Repetition), contrasts conscious (language/logic) vs. subconscious (senses/imagination) processing and notes alpha/theta brainwave states as receptive. Practical guidance includes using imagery and repeated sensory-rich rehearsal to build new habits, adopting identity statements ("I am"), morning gratitude as a daily practice, and resilience as belief in the ability to rebuild.
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Welcome to the Conscious Pivot Podcast with international speaker, business mentor, best selling author of Pivot, and your host, Adam Markell. The Conscious Pivot shares the stories and wisdom of people who have successfully reinvented some area of their business and personal life. You'll gain powerful insights into how you can fully embrace new opportunities, increase your performance, and master the art and science of innovation and resilience. So please join Adam as he guides you on your Conscious Pivot.
Hey everybody. Welcome back to another episode of the Conscious Pivot Podcast. I'm your host, Adam Markell, and I'm really feeling lucky this afternoon to be both in the seat and be able to share some amazing conversation with you. And I know it's going to be amazing conversation because I've already been on my guest's own show, his show, I think, just a couple of weeks ago, and we had just had a wonderful conversation. So I'm already anticipating the richness of the discussion that we'll engage in today and where it may be exactly what some of you are wanting and ready to hear right in this moment. I always think the timing of things is so absolutely perfect and this will be no exception. So I'm going to go ahead and do as I typically do, which is read a bit of his bio and then we'll dig in and ask Rick some questions about that. And then as we were saying right before we turn on the hit the record button to turn the show on, that we're going to allow the conversation just flow and have an organic talk about some things. And really excited about that. So I hope you are as well. Buckle up, you know, pull off the side of the road wherever you can be able to take it in and be fully present is a really great thing. I know that when I'm listening to shows myself, sometimes I'm out in nature. I like to walk and listen. Sometimes it's in the car. I know a bunch of people are spending time in the car these days and that's a great place as well. Treadmill, kind of any place really. So let's talk about Rick Paddock. He's an instructor, hypnotist and podcaster. He loves to teach others about the expansive powers of the human mind. Rick is an instructor for the International Certification Board of Clinical Hypnotherapists. That's a mouthful. And the founder and director of Mid America Hypnosis and Mindset Training center as well as the Milwaukee Hypnosis and Wellness Center. He's an author producer of many successful personal improvement products enjoyed by Thousands of people around the world, including three books and over 50 audio and video programs. He's also a highly sought after speaker, host and producer of the Mind Flipping Podcast. That's the show I was on in which he interviews. Oh, this is nice. World class experts in hypnosis, nlp, meditation, neuroscience and coaching. Wow, that's really cool. Rick, it's a pleasure to now have you back, have you on our show. What a pleasure.
Thank you so much, Adam. Yeah, thanks for having me. And you are a world class expert and I loved having you on and I love listening to your podcast. You're doing important work. So I'm excited to be a part of it.
Yeah, I take that and receive it. And I think it's really important these days that we are very focused on the language that we use when talking about ourselves. Because it's very telling when you say I am and then just look at what follows that statement I am. It's very much a declaration. It's a statement that is a statement of ownership really. So what exactly are you willing to own in the world? And I'm happy to own world class anything, man. But something that's good, something that's of the heart, something that's giving, something that's contributing, anything valuable in the world. To be world class at that is a high compliment and great for any of us really to aspire to. So let's more jump into your work in the world. I mean that bio that I just read a lot in there and what I would love for our folks to know is what's not in the bio, what's not written there that you'd love for people to know about you to start.
Thank you. Great question. Boy, I don't know, I don't know what is important for people to know. I guess as I, as I hear that bio, you know, I recognize, I do. I've always had a lot of interests. I think it was author Barbara Scher, if I'm remembering that I heard that she termed the coin scanners and I'm a scanner. And she described it as people who just like love to like learn and get involved in a lot of different things and, and then we move on to something else. And I've always been that way. And then there's a scanner. Yeah. You know, people that they'll take, you know, a training in, for instance, you know, hypnosis or coaching or you know, cpr and they want to find out everything about that or how to, how to redo their kitchen and so they're going to learn how to. How to sand and paint and dovetail and all these things, and then they move on to something else. And so I've been that and then also just kind of a simple guy, you know. Like, for me, the most important things are relationships, you know, and I'm in many ways easily pleased. You know, my wife and I joke when we go out to eat. You know, I don't need much. I'm a fast food guy. I love great food, but I'm pretty simple. And. And I think despite all those different interests, that's what it comes down to that, you know, I really. People that know me know I'm an emotional guy. I cry tears of joy and sadness a lot. And because I'm. I just. I love people and I love relationships. So that's probably the other thing.
So you probably are well suited, I think, to the, to the podcast arena. I could see you being a radio or a talk show, you know, like a TV or a radio host, because you're got a very relaxing tone in your voice.
It's.
It's an excellent voice for this medium, for sure. Yeah. Is that the reason why you got into hypnosis? That was really the question I wanted to ask you all along is how'd you become a hypnotherapist?
Yeah. Great questions. Well, it's not the reason why it was funny after. I'll give you the journey in a moment. But part of the journey was I first became a coach, like a life coach, and I was calling a colleague, a woman who's become a friend, Joan Sotkin. She's a prosperity coach out of Santa Fe, New Mexico. And we were just talking about business and coaching, I think eft emotional freedom technique. And she said, well, you've got the voice for it or something like that. And through the years, I've. I guess I've only heard it. I recognize it, you know, since then, in the last 10 years. So I joke and people say that, you know, that, yeah, my voice is perfect to quote, unquote, put people to sleep to relax them. But it also makes me a terrible singer. So don't pick me for karaoke. We won't win anything.
That's good. That's really good to know, actually, buddy. So what was it that drew you in? I mean, as you say, you started out as a coach. I think people are pretty fascinated going out on no great limb here to say. Hypnotherapy is definitely one of those things that we've all kind of. We've probably seen it on stage, you know, with a stage performance where it's just mind boggling what people will do under trance. If you. And I've seen it enough to really, truly believe that people, they do get entranced and then they will do things that they wouldn't normally. I saw it with our daughter Chelsea when she was just about 18 or 19 years old. We had taken her to a personal growth seminar and we were part of this thing and she got called up on stage to swallow fire. And she's a really timid kid at that age, really. And she might have even been younger, in fact. And she was completely entranced or whatever the word. She was in state and ate this fire like it was nobody's business and declared out loud, I am there. It is unstoppable.
She owned it.
Oh, she totally owned it.
Right?
Yeah. Lead us into how it is that you ended up doing this work.
Sure. So I. One of the things I love, the many things I love about your podcast and your message in the world is about resilience and reinvention. And that's how I came to it, being a scanner and an entrepreneur. I was in my second business. I was a full time real estate investor. I was a house flipper. And then after the market turned, it hit me pretty hard. I lost properties, I gave up properties. And at that point I was a single dad and lost a bit of who I was. Forgot what I had always known that who we are isn't based on those outside things. And my head was spinning. So I ended up being anxious and depressed and a friend who was a pastor at the church I went to had gotten some coach training, some life coach training and asked me to come to his office because he wanted to, he wanted my feedback on a talk or a seminar series, if I, if I remember right, that he was going to put on. And it was about coaching and how, how much more powerful it was than the traditional pastoral counseling model that he had been using.
Right.
Which was, you know, looking in the past about your upbringing instead the coaching model, looking at where you are now, more importantly, where do you want to go? And, and so in that process of telling me about it, he took me through and I don't know if he, if he had a name for it, if he did, he would have called it a visualization. And it really made a difference in my life. It was what we would call the future self visualization. So I visited my future self and felt some peace and clarity and took away the anxiety. And then so I got into coaching and learned some of these visualizations fast forward. Probably a couple years later in a serendipitous way, a chiropractor friend was telling me he was going for hypnosis training. And I recognized that I now in hindsight then probably had a light bulb go on that perhaps some of your listeners may be flickering. Were. Now here's this friend of mine who's a chiropractor going for training in hypnosis. And I, well, I never really thought about it much. I guess I thought hypnosis or hypnotists were people who had this skill they were born with, you know, that they could, they had a way with words or energy that they could make a difference in people's lives. And then it dawned on me, you know, what's probably like coaching or eft, you know, tapping or havening or all these processes that help people release blocks and obstacles and move forward and get their own answers. And that's what it was. So that's how I came to hypnosis. And I then recognized through my studies and in training that that visualization was hypnosis. It had all of the traditional characteristics. You know, in general, there are kind of four parts to a hypnosis. A more traditional hypnosis session, there's the induction where you induce that, as you called it, you know, trance state. There's often a deepener where you deepen that state. And then there's the suggestive part where you either, for instance, you know, imagine that future self or you know, there's many, many different things. Some hypnotherapists, not myself, usually will regress, you know, to a past, maybe a cause, although we don't really know the causes. And then at the end there's the awakening. And, and so for your listeners that are fascinated or wondering what is this? That in many ways hypnosis are things they've probably already done or familia with like visualizations or like meditations. But maybe just a little bit more goal oriented or a little bit more, you know, with some parameters around it to, to release, to achieve, you know, with a more specific goal than perhaps just a meditation. Right.
Well, what's the history? I mean, I'm fascinated to know and I'm sure other people would, would be thinking themselves. Yeah. Where did his hypnosis even begin? Is there, is there a way to track it back to its real origin state?
Yes. Yeah. So the, you know, I should know this and I did take history courses. You know, a good hypnotherapist or hypnotist will, will study it. I'm trying to. I don't really recall who came up with the name. Hypnosis comes from the hypnos or hypno, which means sleep in Greece because it's a sleep like state. It's not sleep. But there are many people through the years, you know, through centuries. And if we, if we. The challenge with our field of hypnosis is that you get, you know, a hundred hypnotists that have been doing it for 10 plus years and you'll get 90 different definitions. And so if we look at, you know, you know, religious leaders, you know, their ability to be suggestive is hypnotic. You know, people that intentionally. There's Franz Messmer, you've heard of mesmerism. Some of the things he did were very mesmerizing. Yeah, mesmerizing, intentionally hypnotic. Although, you know, some of his things were very questionable. And Emile Couye, you know, came up with, you know, the term every day, in every way, I'm getting better and better. Very hypnotic affirmation. And he did many things that would by modern day standards be considered hypnotic. So there is a long history of hypnosis. But it wasn't until, you know, probably the middle of the last century where people like Dave Elman and Miller Hilton Erickson were real leaders that brought it into the medical field intentionally. I think it was in the 50s that an American Medical Association, I don't know if it's approved or gave it its blessing that it's appropriate for use in medical situations. So there is a long history and one of the challenges we face in the field are the thing that you mentioned. And I have a lot of friends that are both clinicians and stage hypnotists and I have clinical hypnotist friends that hate stage hypnotist because it's a bit of a, looks like a bit of a parlor trick. And if we think about all the different ways that we end up helping people release blocks and obstacles, reinvent their lives and different things from coaching to, you know, acupuncture to, you know, the other things I mentioned, you know, tapping and evening and reiki and chiropractic work, there really aren't any other fields that have this type of an entertainment aspect and. Right. And so I think that in many ways harms the clinician. So yeah, it's an interesting field. I love it more than the field of hypnosis. I just like you love our ability to flip our minds, to be resilient, to Grow and learn and change.
Tell me a little bit about the mind flipping, because I think that's one of those great. Now knowing a little bit more your personal history, that you combine sort of two areas that you. That you had a passion for, that you were scanning and, you know, found these two areas and then put them together, which is the mind work and then that. That flipping component from your real estate days. So what is. What is mind flipping?
Sure. So it's just a, you know, I guess a term I came up with. And the similarity as we're talking about it now is, is my interest, fascination with, like you, our ability to recreate, to reinvent. And so that's what I loved about being a house flipper. As a full time real estate investor, I did flip houses. I had crews that did the work. But seeing something that had deteriorated and then bringing it back to its original splendor or perhaps even better, was so fascinating. And so now, as a hypnotist, as a coach, it's neat to be able to do that. You know, I'll often say that, you know, my clients that come to me, what we're doing is really just getting back to where you were. You know, these habits that people come to me for, these blocks, these obstacles are just learned behaviors. You didn't come into the world with this. So what we're doing is renovating and updating your mind, just like I used to renovate and update homes. And so when I was looking to create the podcast, I came up with a name. You know, there's so many reality shows, you know, house flipping shows. I thought it's what I ended up doing. It's what we do. It's actually not only what hypnotists and coaches do, but we do all the time. We're designed to grow and learn and change and to renovate and update our mind, our thoughts, our feelings in our lives. Sometimes we have to do it. You know, as we've talked about together, Adam, and as guests on your show have life happens and tragedy happens and markets turn and there are vehicle accidents and so many things. So then we have to shift how we think and feel. And then, gratefully, we have times where we can choose to.
And so, yeah, I love the analogy of renovation, personally, because it's something that we can wrap our. We can wrap our brains around. We really can. That something just needs to be renovated. It could be that it's just the windows that need to be replaced. We could talk for hours and hours about what those renovations could look like. But the idea that maybe we all are on some level in this old house episode, in the house being. Being the rooms of our. Of our mind and renovating and updating and even reinventing in some ways, what's going on in between our ears is a big opportunity. It's a big deal. It's a big opportunity as well. So a couple of things about habits, and I'd like to have if there's a way for people to understand a little bit about the hypnosis process so that they might be able to work on themselves, that's one thing as a goal for this episode that I'd like to get at. And then also looking at where that might dovetail with habits, meaning the habits we are looking to create as well as habits that we might want to be breaking. And I think that would be great trajectory for the show. If you might lead us into that just a bit. That would be great.
Yeah, fantastic. I would love to. So where to start?
And while you. While you're determining that. My premise here is that we're all sort of hypnotized in any event, kind of from our. From our habitual thinking, the ways that we think from the moment we wake up and sort of start having conscious thoughts and awareness about our thoughts, that there's a hypnotic rhythm to. To those patterns of thinking that go back, went from wherever they were formed. It could be like, you know, very, very early on. Could be something you just picked up last week, I suppose, but that we are, on some level, all sort of hypnotized. And if we're the ones that are actually. And that's a question, are we the ones hypnotizing ourselves? If so, what do we do about it? If it's coming from elsewhere, how can we be aware and a little bit more conscious of that happening? So maybe that's a place to lead in. And then ultimately, how is it that we might be able to take more of the reins of control there? If that's even possible.
Yeah, fantastic. All right. And so I could talk about this forever. Rein me in if I'm getting off track.
Okay, will do.
But a couple of things that you mentioned, that's a great way of looking at it. Habits in many ways, are hypnotic. You know, in this field, we'll often say that our work isn't as much about hypnotizing somebody as it is de. Hypnotizing them. You know, that they've developed this hypnotic habit, this belief, behavior, thought or feeling, often without their intention or consent. And so the work that we do is getting clear about what would you rather be thinking and feeling? And so I have heard through the years and believe that our subconscious, the place where all of our habits are. And if we look at our thoughts, feelings, behaviors, habits, as things that we just do automatically, we don't think about them. They're on a subconscious level. How do we get those beliefs? And I share, and I believe that there's three primary ways that these habits stick. And the stick is kind of a tie in to the acronym. The acronym is TAR T A R. So the first way is through trauma, Our subconscious, which has the prime directive to keep us safe and comfortable. See something around us or hear something. For instance, mom or dad jumping up on a chair as a mouse runs across the rooms. And we're a child, we think, oh, anything that looks like that, we should be afraid of. You know, there's many other little t traumas or big t traumas that create beliefs in us. I think our listeners can understand that. The second way is through authority figure, especially as kids, but even as adults, somebody or some, you know, person that's important to us, Whether they're close or not, There's a part of us that use them as an authority, and they say, do or express something, and we take that as our belief. And then the third way, gratefully, the last way, is through repetition. And we can think of all the different ways that we develop habits through repetition, like driving, you know, very conscious at first, but then eventually it's automatic.
Brushing your teeth.
Brushing your teeth, yeah. Learning how to type, you know, a musical instrument. Very conscious at first. And then in no time, it's subconscious, it's automatic. And so that third way is the way that we can always intentionally choose to create a new habit. And so how do we do that? Through repetition. And we do it in a little bit different way because we're trying to change that subconscious level again, below awareness. And that's because our subconscious processes information in a different way than our conscious mind. So our conscious mind, that part of our mind where our awareness comes from, processes information through words, language, logic, and reason. And I, you know, I look at our conscious and subconscious. I use the metaphor of kind of like an iPhone and an Android. IPhone apps won't work in an Android, and Android apps won't work in an iPhone. Same thing with these two parts of our mind. They process information differently. And so unlike our conscious mind, which processes information through words, language, logic, and reason, our subconscious processes information through our five senses or through our imagination. So as we imagine seeing, hearing, or feeling primarily. And the feeling part is not only kinesthetically through our body, but through our emotions. That's how it processes information. So I'm trying to wrap this up in a short amount of time. So how can we. How can we make those changes through repetitively imagining ourselves in especially a relaxed, meditative state, making the change. And it's in that place where our subconscious is open and receptive to a new way of thinking and feeling. We're like we're communicating directly with that part of our mind. And. And if it's, if it's in alignment with our. Our morals, our ethics, our values and goals, it has no reason to reject it.
Is this one of the benefits of mindfulness training? Because this is certainly an area that I think a lot of people are exploring and are more open to these days. Meditation, in other words. But when you quiet or create stillness in your mind doesn't mean your thoughts disappear, as most meditators or people that practice that know your thoughts don't stop, and maybe they even race a bit. But the process of bringing yourself back to a point of focus, whether it's in number counting or it's in mantra repetition or in any other form that that's this state of mindfulness or this process of mindfulness. And in that state is that. Is that sort of the fertile ground or the fertile soil where you can then introduce new ideas or things that you want your subconscious to adopt? Is paraphrasing you a little bit there?
Yeah, you're on the right track. There's a great book by Michael, Dr. Michael Yapko, which compares mindfulness to hypnosis pretty extensively. From research to, you know, anecdotal, they're very, very similar. But yeah, you're. You're getting to a similar place. And, you know, there. And the things that I talk about, so much of what I talk about on my mind flipping podcast and in my office and when I give talks, you know, it's what we think we know. And we know that in 10 years we may know something differently or think we were wrong. But what it seems is that when we get to that, you know, there in general are four different measurable brainwave states. There's beta, which is where we're at, very active, you know, brainwave cycles between 13 and 30 cycles per second. Beta is there right below that is Alpha. Below that's theta. And the deepest level, deep sleep, is delta. So getting to those middle two, alpha or theta, that relaxed state of mind, almost like you're asleep or maybe in a light. Sleep are where that critical, analytical, conscious mind gets out of the way. And our subconscious is more open to receiving suggestions. And if we, if we think about, you know, we've heard the expression, or if you have kids, you've seen that up until they're five or six or seven, they're like sponges, you know, they don't know the difference between make believe and reality. They'll take anything in. That's because their prefrontal cortex hasn't developed yet. They don't have the ability to think critically and analytically, to reject thoughts and impressions. And so when we get to that relaxed hypnotic state, we're in that same brainwave state. And so we can get there through mindfulness, through meditation, just of that more relaxed state, in fact, through an eeg. And I don't know if you're familiar, Adam, if your listeners are with the muse, the little EEG thing you put on your head. And it's actually a way to practice meditation. You listen to audios and it changes the audios as your brain starts to race. And so it's basically a little portable eeg. And you can see that you'll drop from beta to alpha level by just simply closing your eyes because you're removing all that visual stimulation. So there are a lot of ways to do it. Mindfulness is a fantastic practice and way to get to that open and receptive state.
So a question I have about habits is related to what we said earlier. Beautiful. That we're going to, I believe, not so much close the loop, but we'll, we'll take this a little further here, which is this idea of the things we say to ourselves, those I am statements that, that I would call identity. You're. You're giving yourself an identity in essence, and that as part of making a change. Because I think there's anybody that's watching this, listening to this, is saying to themselves, there's some areas of my life that I'd like to improve. And we know that to improve anything, we've got to change something. So it's kind of the first basic level of awareness and then understanding that there are things you do to change. Frankly, if we could change that easily, we probably would have already. So it's a bit of a process. And what I'd love is to help people to understand in the process of creating a new habit, do we have to change our identity? I'll give you an example. I was in reinventing my career from that of lawyer to that of public speaker and trainer and facilitator, etc. And author. I really had to stop referring to myself or change the way I was referring to myself at that time as being, I'm a lawyer. I would stop saying I am a lawyer, even though I was still a lawyer. I was a lawyer for more than two and a half years professionally as I was moving into this other area. But along, along that path, I started to refer to myself differently. I would refer to myself as a speaker or as an author. And I began to adopt a new identity. In the book, in pivot. Talk about this pivot phone booth, that's kind of a figurative thing, but we, you know, like Clark Clint Clark, Clark Kent, who goes into the pivot phone booth as that guy and then emerges as Superman. And it's a good analogy for, I think, this idea of this concept of changing your identity. So my question to you is, do you have to change your identity or is that a part of the process of creating new habits on some level? Do you think?
Yes, and I love it.
Not. But those of you that probably heard this, maybe and maybe not, but anytime you put that word but, you know, I respect you, but. Or I respect what you're saying, but. Right. I love you, but it's a negation of every. Of everything that came before the word but. So, you know, thank you for saying and there, Rick, I have a feeling you're going to plus me here, so I appreciate that.
Well, I think that that is a great place. Everybody's different, you know, I guess. I'm curious, though. I want to hear a little bit of your story as you recognized that ownership in your identity. What was the process for? Like, you did you intentionally say, all right, I may always. A part of me may always be an attorney, but now I'm going to refer to like, what was that process like for you?
Yeah, it's. It's really interesting. And I am still an attorney. I just don't practice law anymore. And. But at a point in time, I, for me, in my process, I needed to. I needed to lean forward onto something that I wanted to become and not lean back on something that I already was. And so I started to consciously say that to myself that I am. And then I would change from I am a lawyer, I am a lawyer, counselor, etc. Into this new thing. And at the beginning, I didn't believe it. The cells of my body knew better. I was still a lawyer. I was still practicing law much more frequently than I was doing anything else. So it was the repetition of both my saying I am something different and the things that I was doing in connection with that. Because if I just said, you know, I could say I am an Olympic athlete, I am an Olympic athlete, I am a world class new gymnast. But if I'm not actually in the gym doing gymnastics or competing or registering to compete in competition, then then I. There's a disconnect, right? And I think that, that. So for me, because I was saying I am a speaker and I was then speaking on weekends pretty much twice, three times a month. So I had the repetition, doing the thing and the statements that I was saying to myself that my new identity is this and the repetition of the activity that at a certain point I stopped questioning it. You know, at the beginning it didn't make sense because to go from one thing or one way of thinking or one way of being to a different one is really artificial. Just give you one more example. I started about 10 years ago waking up in the morning and putting my feet on the floor and, and instead of saying some of the things I used to say, which I won't actually repeat now here, I've said them before, but, but I started saying I love my life. And those words, I love my life. I didn't love my life 100% then. I mean, there were lots of areas that I really was very unhappy about. But I started to say that and so it started to be not only a rep. A repetitive behavior, but it was also the belief that I was saying, I am someone. I am someone who loves life. I am someone who loves my life. I am someone who's grateful for my life no matter what is going on in my life. And at that time was, you know, just really in that icky stage of, you know, with the caterpillar, I wasn't a butterfly and I wasn't quite a caterpillar right in the middle and, and it was, and it didn't feel great. So yeah, so it was both of those things.
Yeah. Thank you. Thanks for sharing that. And so as you're talking about it, you know, I'll often share with my, with my clients or people in the audience that as we kind of touched on in many ways, for me it helps to look at my mind and for us to look at our subconscious as a 5 year old. And so as we're looking to change our identity or change a habit, it's as if we're the opposite, putting our arm around that, you know, that five year old and saying, okay, while, you know, for Instance, you know, a lot of your listeners will know that for there's a lot of research that shows that hypnosis, the processes of hypnosis, is very effective at helping people quit smoking. Most research shows it's the most effective. And so using that as an example, taking, you know, let's say I'm a smoker looking to step into the identity of a non smoker, I metaphorically put my arm around my five year old subconscious and say, listen, I understand there were positive, first of all, every habit that we have, there is a positive benefit, there is a positive intent or we wouldn't do it. So you're saying thank you for that habit. But now I recognize in my life I'm ready to quit smoking or I'm ready to love my life or I'm ready to step into being a speaker. And so it's my choice. And these are the reasons why. And so at first it can feel like a little bit of incongruence, like you said, you know, I don't know, maybe a little part of me felt like it.
It's a lie at the beginning, it's.
A lie until you can find one little proof. So you started speaking on weekends. People that would come to me through the years to quit smoking, I would say, before they came for their first session, I'd say, make sure you have your last cigarette, consciously have your last cigarette and then come see me, bring any remaining ones or throw them away. And I'd say, congratulations, you're a non smoker, you're done, you're not smoking now. You may relapse. You know, that's the reality. Some people relapse. But you are a non smoker. And my experience is for most of us, when we're looking to change a habit, when we remind ourselves, this is who I want to be. And you and only you have the right, the power and the authority to choose your identity. And sometimes there is work, you know, but we've got that five year old subconscious we've got our arm around and say, stick with me. I'm choosing. I may always be an attorney, I may always be this or that, but I'm choosing to step into the identity of this and together we're going to do it. Does that make sense?
We truly own that. I mean it's, it's, nobody can take that from us. Whatever we, we fill in the blank after those words. I am is ours to own. Nobody, nobody can change that for us.
Or.
Stop us from, from adopting that. That is true, true freedom. You brought up the idea, the issue of relapse. And when it comes to quitting smoking or with diets or anything like that, relapse is a big thing. People kind of fall, they fall off the wagon. And I think that's important because when we've changed our identity, there's less likelihood in my experience, that we do relapse. And that's why I asked you about identity, because. So I'll give you an example. My son in law, who I refer to as my son, but just for the sake of the story, he's marrying our oldest daughter and he was wanting to get in better shape for the wedding a couple of months back. And so a few months before that, he really put himself on quite a regimen of exercise and even eating more healthily. And he's been health conscious for sure. He'd done a good job of that already. But he really wanted to make a change and so he did. He lost quite a bit of, you know, he lost inches and pounds and looked great on the wedding day and everything else, I mean, was really, really just did a great job. And a couple of weeks after the wedding, like you'd imagine with a lot of people, you know, the wedding's over, pictures are done, everything was great. And now some of that weight started to come back. And a part of that is that. But his, his premise, the goal, let's call it, was to look, you know, look his best on the day of his wedding. And then the wedding happens and that's no longer the driving, that's not the force, that's not the goal that he has in mind anymore because he's achieved that goal. So his identity didn't, didn't change. The goal of looking the best I can on my wedding day is not an identity goal. But to say something like, you know, I am a healthy eater, that is my identity, I am a health conscious person, or I am somebody that I am, I'm committed to eating, eating as well as Olympic athletes eat or you know, fill in the blank. But that shift in identity would mean that even after the wedding was over, the identity would have continued to drive the behaviors that would ultimately lead to either looking, looking the way he did on the wedding or looking a little differently when that was, you know, no longer the goal. So I guess my question to you is, again, is there a place where you think that people are, are more likely to keep their habits, other mindsets that they're less likely? Because I'd love if we can give folks a recipe to sort of Hypnotize themselves. Maybe one of those things to me is that I am statement that that's a. That's a hypnotic statement of a sort. At least that's how I look at it. What are some of the other ways that people can use hypnosis to get themselves to maybe do things that they're reluctant to do? Maybe they think of themselves like, I'm a procrastinator. You know, I am not a morning person, I'm not an evening person, you know, any number of things that they are hypnotically saying to themselves that create an identity. What can we do to sort of empower them to other. Other intentions, let's say?
Yeah, well, I guess three things are kind of popping up. First of all, I agree with you 100% that identity is huge. And when we can step into that place where we choose our identity, that's huge. And you know, there are different types of habits. And depending on the level of habit change you're looking to make, recognize the different identities of who you are when you were in this habit and who you're stepping into when you don't. And be aware of that. The second thing is our words, our self talk and recognizing that there's a difference between saying, you know, I procrastinate at times and I'm a procrastinator, or, you know, I've got a sweet tooth, or I have a history of liking sweets, you know, but we always had the ability to step into a different thing, you know, a different identity, a different belief. One way to help with that is to. Is to tell yourself, you know, I may always remember how I used to like sweets. I may always remember how I was a procrastinator. But I'm choosing to no longer be that way. And occasionally I may remember it more than I used to. So then how do we remind our subconscious? It's through, you know, on that. Speaking of, you know, hypnosis or a hypnotic level is to again, communicate with your subconscious in the way that it needs to be or likes to be communicated. So continue to see yourself if you're. Especially if you're. What's called. Your primary representational system is visual. If you can see yourself stepping into the life, the habit that you want, see it more and more. If you can hear, let yourself talk, or let yourself imagine others saying, for instance, your son in law, you look fantastic. I can tell you've taken a turn in life. You know, you view yourself differently. You know, here imagine other people talking about you the way you want people to Talk about you feel, feel in your body and feel the emotions of empowerment, of control, of whatever the opposite of those habits are. And then I guess you know, the last way I'm thinking of. Dr. Jeffrey Schwartz did a lot of work with OCD patients and just identifying that while you may be relapsing or doing, thinking, feeling it a way that you used to, that you're trying to step out of, you can tell yourself, it's not me, it's just my brain. It's those old neural pathways firing, but I'm creating new ones, and this is how I'm going to do it. And you just continue through repetition. It'll happen through imagining, seeing, hearing and feeling, and then actually acting on it and doing it. Like you did. You got out and you spoke, you did it, and eventually your subconscious. That's all it knows. I'm a speaker where I love my life. Exactly.
Convince yourself no matter what. Yes. It's so funny. There are. There are so many ways to use hypnosis. What do you just give us, if you could. A maybe one thing that people could do, something that they can adopt on a daily basis to start, maybe start the day. Finish the day. Is it. Do you believe it's more. More powerful how you begin the day or how you set. How you put yourself to sleep at night?
Boy, great question, Adam. I guess if I had to choose, I'd say beginning, I'd say begin the day. Because to your point, if and maybe to answer both of those questions, just the one thing that bubbles up, you know, one tip, and it's perhaps like mindfulness for some people, it might be, oh, not this again. It's gratitude. And starting your day, as I love, part of your message, that place of gratitude, you know, when you can open your eyes and either say, I love my life or thank you for another day or I'm excited about, then there's the likelihood of that, you know, there's that reticular. Reticular activating system, I think is the term. That part of our brain that looks for that which we're, you know, talking about and setting the intention for. So if you set that in the morning, you're going to find it throughout the day. And the flip side, speaking of incongruence, if we just go through our day and at the end of the day say, I'm grateful, thank you, and yet we haven't. Haven't acted that way throughout the day, there's a bit of incongruence. So they're both important. But I Would say starting. You know, starting and then ending your day from a place of gratitude. And.
Yeah, let's talk about resilience for as we wrapping up. And I. I'd love to get your definition. How do you. How do you think of or define resilience?
Hmm. I don't know that I would define it, but a word that comes up for me is belief. Belief in yourself. I have it in my office, the office where I see clients one on one. I have a. What's called a lenticular print. It's kind of like those decoder rings where you turn them. And it would look different. You know, we'd have greeting cards. And it's a print of a tree, and it shows the tree in all four seasons. And I show my clients that, and it looks cool. I'll turn it, you know, you can see. Wow, that's really cool. It's neat how they can print it like that.
Say to you, are you hypnotizing me now?
Right. Right. Is this where it starts?
Is this where it begins? Right. Look deeply into the tree.
Right. Pick a leaf. Pick any leaf. But I show that because, for me, it's a visual reminder of what we sometimes forget, and that's that, like the trees around us, like nature, we are designed to grow and learn and change. So for resilience, just remembering and believing that we can start over, we can rebuild, we can renovate, and we are resilient, and that's in our DNA. And having that belief that anybody and not only can be, but we are resilient.
Right. It's the seasons as well. Right. You see what the trees or anything in nature, how it adapts. Adaptability is such a big part of resilience, and it's hard to adapt if you think things are permanent. I forget this psychologist that talked about permanence and pervasiveness, and he had a third P, I think, as well. But this idea that you just. You see, you see, there's. There's kind of no light at the end of the tunnel, basically, versus, you know, you're in the middle of winter. Even the most pessimistic person doesn't think winter is going to last for. For the next nine months, because we already know it doesn't work like that.
Yes.
And so even though winters can be longer or shorter, and when we lived on the East Coast, I know we were always so excited on Groundhog Day because if I forget whether, you know, Punxsutawney Phil would see his shadow, and if he didn't see his shadow, it meant one thing. And if he saw his shadow, it meant, you know, it was going to be a longer winter and all this Navy be so excited that winter was going to be shorter kind of thing, but you knew it was going to end at some point, spring was going to naturally follow. And I think resilience in many ways is, as you say, it's understanding that that's something that we do go through seasons and that if you have that intellectually about yourself as well as in nature, there's reason to be hopeful that the warmth will return, the change of season will occur. So very much like the tides, and there's just so many examples in nature to see tides coming in and coming out and what that means and even in connection with things like paying your bills. I know people have lots of money worries. Many people do. And this whole idea of being sort of upset when money is leaving but happy when money's coming in again, it's the season, it's the title process of things coming in and going out. And could you be grateful? Is it possible to feel gratitude for the tide that is going out just as much as you're feeling great gratitude for the tide coming in? It's interesting. What is one, one thing that you do for yourself to maintain or create resilience?
I guess just what's bubbling up is that gratitude. And it comes, I think gratitude can come from this moment, that in this moment, speaking of mindfulness, I'm here, I'm breathing, and everything is okay in this moment. And then when appropriate, you know, I'm not big into looking into the rear view mirror, but I am grateful for the life I've lived and excited for what's coming up. So that's what comes up for me.
Yeah, that's beautiful. Rick, as. As the last time you and I chatted was on your show, I enjoyed it so much. And this is just the same feel, feel really blessed that you're here with us and that our folks could get a taste of you in the show notes. For folks that want to find out more about the work that Rick is doing in the world, his books, his trainings, you know, sort of A to Z on mind flipping, such a cool concept, as well as the show itself in the show notes, there'll be lots of links and places you guys can find out more and learn more from this amazing gentleman. So thanks, Rick. Thanks for being on the show today. Really appreciate you being here. And for all of you out there, I want to remind, and I think this is a Wonderful way to follow this thread, which is that we will. No doubt. I say no doubt because it's my intention that there's no doubt that we get to wake up again tomorrow, because there is no guarantee. We all get that. And it is truly a miracle of a sort when we wake up tomorrow, take that first breath. Knowing other people are taking their last breath in that moment makes that moment a miracle. I can't say it enough, and I don't need to. You know, I shouldn't say that. I believe I do repeat it again and again and again because I want to hear it again and again. I know a part of me says this is a message other people ought to hear about need, but I think it's a good message to share. And yet I know I want to hear that message again and again and again to just start the day, plant those first seeds in the fertile soil of our own mind at the start of the day with something that's true, really true on a basic level, and that is that it's a blessing to be alive. It really is. And if you are also inclined in the moment of feeling that gratitude or that blessing, to put words to it, find words that make sense to you to put to it with an I am statement or some other statement. My four simple words, they really work for me. And they didn't work at the beginning necessarily the way they work today, because they were new and they were different and I wasn't. I hadn't completely adopted the identity of somebody that could love, Love their life in the midst of anything, in the midst of chaos, in the midst of. Of any number of things that we, you know, that we can. We can conceive of that. That can happen. And yet that's my identity today. And that's after a lot, a lot of just making that so through repetition and the talking directly, I suppose, to the subconscious. And that's been great. So I going to ask you, Rick, do you love your life?
I do. I love my life. I love you, Adam. I'm so grateful for the opportunity to be here. Thank you so much. It's a blessing.
That's beautiful. Beautiful, beautiful. All right, everybody, ciao for now. Have a wonderful rest of your day, your evening, wherever you are in the world. We really, we appreciate you. And as Rick just said, I love you. Thanks, Rick. You're awesome.
Thank you. Thank you.
Bye.
Thanks for listening, everyone. We hope you now have the tools and greater insights to navigate your own pivot. Help us inspire others by sharing this episode and leaving your comments over@adammarkel.com podcasts for more tips, strategies and support as you consciously pivot into a new business and lifestyle you love. Join our Pivot community on facebook@pivotfb.com.
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