Arthur C. Brooks explains why achieving wealth, power, fame, and pleasure often leaves people empty. The intense focus on self isolates you and makes your brain obsess over how others see you, destabilizing your mental health. These four goals fail to deliver happiness when pursued as ends rather than means.
Why is it that sometimes we can build the life that we think we wanted, yet still feel quite empty?
The reason is because we isolate ourselves. When you're only focusing on yourself as opposed to other people, you are alone. Really lonely people, they often have very big jobs. I know a lot of lonely famous people. I know a lot of lonely powerful people, a lot of lonely rich people, and they're never by themselves. But it's all deal, all deal friendships. It's not real friendships. And the reason is because it's me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me, me. And your brain is going to break because of that. I mean, your brain won't work right as result of that, because your interiority will actually start to become referential to what other people are thinking of you. So you're thinking of you and wondering what other people are thinking of you. It'll drive you almost quite literally insane, because, you know, we're naturally attuned to the idols of life: money, power, pleasure, and fame. Those are the big four. That's what our genetics say will give us a better life, because they're going to give you more resources and more mates, etc. That's not what we want. That's not actually going to bring us happiness at all. There's nothing wrong with those things unless they become a goal.
