Stay calm before a hard conversation. Show up neutral and non-threatening so the other person knows you're listening, not attacking. Position yourself as a co-creator of solutions, not an adversary, and the whole dynamic shifts toward actually solving something together.
As you're about to have a very difficult conversation and to be grounded and clear and centered so that the nature of the conversation can happen in what, you know, we love to call this Goldilocks zone of the window of tolerance so that you're not showing up in a way where you're already activated or angry or anxious or frustrated. But you're showing up with a neutral presence that allows you to really listen to the other person so that the other person can actually feel what's happening within you, that you're not there to rap them on the head, that you're there to co-create a solution in a difficult situation, that you respect what they've tried or done, and that you together look for ways to— create a better outcome. When people can feel that you're not there to threaten or hammer them, it's a completely different conversation.
Reducing Regrettable Attrition in Organizations by Fixing the System, Not the People Reducing Regret
