Self-pity isolates you by making everything about you, while self-compassion connects you to others through shared struggle. When you stop taking events personally and remember everyone suffers, you find the groundedness and stability we all need.
What's the difference between self-compassion and self-pity? Self-pity is poor me, it's very self-focused. Compassion, you know, compassion is by definition connected. If I pity you, Ashish Kothari, you aren't gonna like it 'cause I'm like looking down on you, I feel separate. If I have compassion, it's like, hey, I've been there, I've done that. There's a sense of connectedness built in to compassion that's rooted in our shared humanity. So it's common humanity that provides the connectedness. Which is so huge. And in fact, as I, you know, over these last 20 years, part of me thinks that's actually the number one thing we need. Again, so many of our problems come from taking things personally, identifying our sense of self with what's happening, as opposed to stepping back and kind of seeing the larger picture, seeing the larger whole. And this is kind of what grounds us, gives us a sense of connectedness, it gives us a sense of groundedness and stability.
Reducing Regrettable Attrition in Organizations by Fixing the System, Not the People Reducing Regret
