7 Principles for Creating Your Desires with Christy Whitman

Are you ready to create riches in your work and life? It's time for Shedding the Bitch Radio and TV, where you can discuss, debate, and get advice on how to discover and shed the bitches of fear, insecurity, self-doubt, and negativity so you can realize your dreams and life purpose and create and accelerate the riches in life you deserve. So let's welcome your ball of fire host, Bernadette Boas.

Good day, good day, good day everyone, and welcome, welcome, welcome. This is going to be a fabulous conversation today because we're going to talk about creating your desires, and we are going to do that with our guest who I'm going to introduce in just a second. So let's get into this because we need to find ways to create our desires. So there is no limit to the amount of happiness that we as human beings can experience. There is no limit to how much love, laughter, excitement, or satisfaction we can feel. This universe is unendingly abundant, which means that it has the ability to yield to us whatever experiences we desire. Why then do some people manifest their desires so fluidly and naturally while others are living lives of struggle, mediocrity, or Quiet Depression. Hard work alone does not guarantee a positive result. In fact, pushing forward with determination and effort when things are not going as planned usually only makes a bad situation worse. I can attest to that for sure. Energy, not action, is the source of all manifest— manifested things, and the desire factor is the definitive guide to achieving energy mastery. The Desire Factor provides one of the most current, comprehensive, and easy-to-apply explorations into the realm of energy and shows readers how, by purposely calibrating the energetic frequency of their dominant thoughts, moods, and expectations, they can bring any desire— any desire— into physical form. The book The Desire Factor is built around 7 universal principles each of which assists readers in connecting with and deliberately harnessing the divine energy stream that sources all things. These are the principles of alignment, the principle of focus, the principle of joyful expectation, the principle of having— the principle— the principle of having, the principle of loving, the principle of surrender, and the principle of action. Now, what our guests and I would love for you to be listening for and thinking about are the 5 common obstacles that may be standing in your way of manifesting your desires. The 2 things can— that can stop someone from creating what they desire. The desire factor you have, which includes 7-step approach to creating desires that are like a combination lock. You just have to figure out what that combination is and unlock anything and everything that you want. We also want you to be listening for what the emotional dial is and how we can master it and generate our mood on purpose. And lastly, how can you make the shift from arguing for your limitations to advocating for your success? Now, for our guest Christy Whitman and myself, I provide you— or actually it's Christy and all of you— I provide you a rich question that helps you be grounded in the conversation we're going to have. In case you're like thinking, oh, this doesn't really relate to me. Yes, it does. So your rich question for today that we want you to be thinking about, and most likely Christy will answer it for you, um, and if she doesn't, then I'll get you the information, um, in order for you to reach out to her. But the rich question I want to leave with you is, what is one thing that you sense, whether gently or with great vigor, that is holding you back from attracting everything that you want in your life? What is just one, one thing that you feel is holding you back? All right, keep that in mind. And through the desire factor and the multitude of conversation we're going to have, most likely our guest is going to address it for you. All right, so let me introduce you to our guest. Christy Whitman is the New York Times bestselling author and the transformational leader who has appeared on the Today Show, The Morning Show, TEDx, and the Hallmark Channel, and her work has been featured in numerous publications and magazines. Christy teaches the law of attraction, energy mastery, and personal development with classes, meditation, and private sessions to help clients feel more aligned with the divine design of well-being, abundance, and success. She currently lives in sunny Arizona with her husband and two boys, and you can meet her and learn more about her at christywhitman.com. So let me welcome to the stage, so to speak, is Christy. How are you?

Hello, I'm so happy to be with you.

Yes, you too. Well, first off, drop your head just a little bit. I love that image behind you. Is that a window?

This, yes, this is, this is an art piece that I saw in Sedona. It was huge when I saw it, and I had contacted the artist and he said, I have one that's purple, which purple is my favorite color. And he said, yeah, and he said, so I have a small one, and I thought it'll be perfect, fit right in that space between my blind or my, my shutters when I do interviews.

Absolutely.

Yeah, I love it.

It makes you feel very divine, as we're going to talk about today. Very divine. Yeah. But before we get into all of it, give us an idea of kind of where have you come from, so to speak, to where then you're focusing in on this particular subject matter, which is so critical to people really opening up and realizing their dreams and goals.

Absolutely. So 25 years ago is when I started learning about these principles because I came from a place of— I achieved things and I checked the box for all the things that I wanted in my life and I got them and I still wasn't happy. And so for me, it was a feeling of like, wait a minute, I'm in my young 20s, not now, almost 25 years ago. I'm in my young 20s and I've accomplished all that I wanted to do and experience and yet I'm not happy. So what gives? And for me, it was a question of, is this all there is? And that question, that hunger, that thirst to learn more about how do I find and sustain my happiness and my joy really led me on a really beautiful conscious spiritual journey where I literally met a woman who said to me for the first time, again, it's 25 years ago, there was no internet back then or, you know, wasn't like it is now. There wasn't people online talking about this. She said to me, you create your own reality. And when she said that, something opened up in, right? It was like undeniably this power, this— yeah. And, and then, excuse me, my mind kicked in. My mind said, well, how, how do I create my own reality? And she continued by saying, your thoughts, your thoughts are either attracting things to you or repelling things from you based on the way you think.. And so that became like, what? And so for me, she gave me a homework assignment and I'm so glad she did this. She goes, I want you, cause, cause this was the moment for me where I realized, wait a minute, I'm not my thoughts. My thoughts aren't real. Like there's something happening here. Like everything I'm thinking is not real and concrete. And so when I started discovering, she asked me to go home and just pay attention to your thoughts. And when I did that, I realized how negative I was. How critical, how judgmental, not just of myself, but of everyone, God, everything, right? A mountain wasn't right. It was like nothing was ever right because it was coming through a filtration system of lack and limitation. And what I realized back then is that's how I was raised. That's how my parents still to this day, at 85 and 89, they still think everything's wrong and bad. There's always something to worry about. Murphy's Law. If something's going to happen, it's going to happen worse. That's how they thought. That's how think. That's how they live their lives, that everything is a struggle, that everything is, you know, push hard and not get, you know, barely get any rewards. And I just got tired of that. I said, well, there's got to be a different way. And through meditation and through understanding these universal laws that I now talk about and train people to apply in their own lives, my life literally became something that I don't even recognize. Like, I don't recognize her from 25 years ago and how negative she was.

Nice.

Yeah, that's been the biggest thing though, is, is really shifting my consciousness, my awareness from lack and limitation to abundance.

Yep. All right, so raise your hand, people out there, ladies out there. Well, actually, because I have to admit, Christy, not even that long ago, like 8 years ago, if you had told me my thoughts were driving everything that I was getting in my life or doing in my life or being in my life I would have told you you're smoking something.

Yeah.

You know, I just didn't get it. So I wish I had found it 25 years ago. It would have saved me a lot of pain, a lot of frustration, you know? But at the same time, I'm glad I found it now. And I'm glad we found you. Oh, because you're going to be able to help us kind of really understand for those that are listening that are like, what? What does she mean my thoughts are driving? And because they're not even There's a lot of them, aren't they? Like subconscious, unconscious, let alone words.

We're not even— words we're not even aware— thoughts we're not even aware of that literally create our reality. And that's the thing, is that it becomes a really beautiful journey when you start to pay attention to your consciousness, because our consciousness is what's creating everything in our world. It's not even just our thoughts. So if we could break down what is our consciousness, our consciousness is the words that we speak. Either out loud or to ourselves, right? The words that we say, the thoughts that we think, the beliefs or the perspectives or the expectation is another aspect of that.

Love that. Love that.

Our feelings or emotions. Most of us, at least those— I'm 50, almost 51. Most people in my generation and even generations before me and generations behind me don't know how to properly process emotions and to have a high emotional intelligence. So that's number 4. And then number 5 is 5—

5—

number 5 is 5. Number 5 is action. So we have words, thoughts, beliefs, feelings, and actions, and that makes up our consciousness. And beyond that, we really don't have a lot of control, because when you think about it, when we try to go change somebody else's consciousness, how they believe or how they think we end up getting frustrated, so do they. We can't think for another person, nor can someone think for us.

Right.

We are thinking mechanisms and we are independent of each other. And yet what's interesting is that we are also very connected too. But when we try to change someone else in order to make their behavior change in order for me to be happy, or even if my money would just change, then I'll be happy. Or if I was this much more successful, if this would happen. Then I would be happy, we are literally not in our power and we're giving our power away.

So you're also suggesting that ladies stop trying to change people.

Yes. You want to change someone, change yourself because that's the only one that ever works. You can't change another person no matter how hard we try. Right.

And we spend so much time trying to do that. And yet, go inward. Go inward, go inward. Um, well, you talk about— I, I love this whole, um, desire factor, but what would you say— why am I getting feedback? Am I getting feedback for you?

No, no.

Okay, okay, let's hope it's not on the— okay. Um, so what would you say are the, you know, 3, 5 obstacles that are really getting in the way of individuals manifesting their desires, really getting what it is that they want. What is—

Let's look at 3 of those because we already tried to talk about the first one and we can go deeper with the first one. The first one is ourselves. We become an obstacle. Just even thinking that there's an obstacle becomes the obstacle. So even asking yourself, what am I, what's holding me back? It's the perception that something's holding you back. Because what if you didn't have the perception that anything is holding you back? Then nothing would hold you back. So we're our own, because again, we create from our consciousness. And what's our consciousness? It's our words, our thoughts, our beliefs, our feelings, and our actions. If we are resisting any of those, we become our own obstacle. So we're— number one is us. Nothing else. No one is standing in our way It's just our perception a lot of times that they're standing in our way. So we're the number one. Number two is other people. And still, if you perceive that it's other people, you've lost your power because really, in reality, it's only us. But we let other people— and I'll give an example of that. And then the third is not knowing how, right? A lot of times, like, I don't know how, so I might as well give up now. You know, it's a great idea. I have that desire. Don't know how. Oh well.

Yep.

Right. So if we break those three down, for the first one we've already talked about, it's us, right? But it's always us. So we— so the great news is, is that if we're our own obstacle, we can be our own cheerleader. We could be our own mentor. We could be our own driver. You know, we can literally change and One of the things that happens a lot of times is if we get excited about a desire, for example, and I'll just, I'll bring up a desire I had 15 years ago. I've been coaching for 20 years. And around 15 years ago, I was working for corporate America. I had a corner office and a nice sales, I was sales training manager for a biotech company. And I really wanted to be a coach full-time. I really wanted to impact change in other people in their lives. But I wasn't doing that as a full-time income or a full-time business. I was still as a pharmaceutical sales training manager. And so, I would literally get so excited when I was thinking about the desire to be my own boss and to make my own hours and own my calendar and to have the people, the places, all those things by my choice and to make my own money and to be as creative as I want to do. These are all the things that I was really looking forward while I was still in corporate America. And I remember when I made that decision and I went full-time, I quit my day job and my mother was freaking out because here her daughter has a job, right? She got the title, she's got the corner office, she's making the money. And I left it all to be a coach. And so number one, she didn't understand coaching. She doesn't understand universal laws, law of attraction. And at that time, 15 years ago, most people, not anybody really, didn't have an online business. And so I was doing, she's like, "I don't understand. You're not going somewhere?" So every time I talked to her, I had to center myself in my choice and in my abundance and feeling the success that I ultimately wanted to attract, even in the beginning when I only had a couple of clients. And so when I would get on the phone with her, she'd be like, "How's your business? How you doing?" It was just full of worry and freaking out. And I'd be like, "I'm doing great. I'm abundant." you know, the clients are flowing to me. And then she'd be like, oh, okay. Right. It would calm her down. I had to be at least aware and mindful that the person that I'm going to be talking to is coming from a consciousness of fear and worry. And if I'm going to be in a conversation with her, she's going to be projecting her fear and worry on what I feel stable about. Right. When you understand what the perceived obstacle can be, and some of it feels very real, like my mom, every time I talked to her and she— that was very real. So I had to ground myself in feeling the passion and the purpose and the excitement and all the things of growing an online business and growing a coaching business. And so that became easier to do when I understood that she's going to try to talk me out of it or try to get me to go back into corporate America, right? Yeah. And even though I didn't know the how, which is the third obstacle, by staying in the energy of it, the hows always come. Because we have to remember we're energy beings. Yes, we're physical beings, but anything that forms itself in the material world first comes from energy. You cannot be in a mindset of lack and feeling impatience and then have the fulfillment of the abundance of what you're wanting. It's two totally different vibrations, right? Right. So, so the how— I mean, the desire factor is the how of how to manifest anything.

You can hold that back up.

It's so pretty. I just love her energy. It's amazing. But yeah, it's, you know, so it's like we are the biggest obstacle. And once we understand that our, our we're an obstacle with our thinking, with our feeling, with our perspective, then we can change it. Because I can't change my mom. I could just connect with myself to amp up my own energy so that my vibration is in success and not going to a place of fear and worry. Right. And the how of it, when I'm co-creating and partnering with the divine that gave me the desire in the first place, Well, I know that the divine has the how. I just have to feel my way into it.

Yeah. Well, and I'd love for you to kind of, um, reiterate too, when it comes to you— not you, but the general statement of us individually, um, especially for all of those entrepreneurs out there who are going out there and, you know, they're acting in desperation. You— and you use the word lack. And, you know, and fear, how that is actually repelling what it is that they want. Because I'll be honest with you, when I first started, you know, really kind of also understanding Law of Attraction and all these universal, you know, factors and energy, I, I really had a hard time wrapping my head around the fact that, you know, my, my need for income and, and clients was, was repelling. Yeah. So could you touch on that?

Yes. So, one of the laws that I always talk about, which is even I find for me is more important to understand the law of attraction is the law of sufficiency and abundance. Because law of sufficiency and abundance really helps us understand our world of polarity here, right? Because the universe really is abundant and you can see so much evidence of it. Just even us in our physical bodies, we have tens of trillions of cells that even make up our physical bodies. We in, in and of itself are abundant. We are evidence of abundance. If you look at an ocean, right, you can't count the amount of waves that the ocean produces, and nor can you count the amount of water or the grains of sand that are at the beach where the ocean is. There's just absolute evidence of this abundance. Now, because we are in a 3D world, yes, there is also evidence of lack. But there's both, both coexist. And when you focus on the abundance, you receive and attract more abundance. When you focus on the lack, you receive and attract more lack because you're going to get an abundance of what you focus on. So a lot of times people are getting an abundance of lack or abundance of struggle or abundance of pain, and that's how they live their lives because they get stuck in that energy, which creates a momentum and that momentum then attracts things to them. So when you look at things like any subject— it could be money, it could be relationships, it could be your career success, it could be your health and well-being, it could be anything— every subject really is two subjects. It's the lack of it or the fulfillment of it, the abundance of it. And so if you look at it like a spectrum, on one side of the spectrum is lack On the other side of the spectrum is abundance. Now, Cliff Note version, lack always feels bad. You know you are in lack if you feel bad. So any of the emotions of trepidation, of disappointment, worry, fear, doubt, frustration, anger, sadness, I mean, the, you know, apathy, all of that, that just does not feel good to a human being. That's when you know some part of your consciousness, either the words that you're saying, the thoughts that you're thinking, the perspective that you have, the feelings that you have or don't process, or the actions that you're taking are coming from lack. And that will always— because everything is vibration in this universe— that will attract more and more evidence of lack. But if you flip to the other side of the spectrum which is abundance, abundance always feels good. Yeah, that's, that's where joy and passion and purpose and sensuality and excitement and success and well-being and love and all of those good human emotions, it comes from a perspective of lack. You know you're feeling abundance if you feel good. Lack feels bad, abundance feels good. Well, there's a tipping point, right? There's a tipping point which at some point you got to go from lack to abundance, that tipping point, that fulcrum, is satisfaction. And if we can find satisfaction, if we can find a place of looking for positive aspects, looking for what's right and good instead of what's wrong and bad, that tips us into more of abundance. And then we feel good. And then if we're feeling good, we attract more. So if you're in your business for example, and you realize that, oh, I got some bills I gotta pay, I gotta get some clients, right? And your perspective is on, ooh, I need— I don't have something, right? It's a reality. You're looking at it going, okay, I need this thing, right? How do you then vibrate in a place of abundance, of having all that you need and more, so you're a vibrational match to it and not absent of it? Well, that's where the feeling— it's one of the principles that we talk about in The Desire Factor, but it's actually the fourth step. It's the principle of having. Whenever you notice you're lacking something, whether it's I'm lacking support, get yourself into the energy field of feeling what it feels like to be supported. If you're thinking that you're financially in lack and that you're in debt and all these things, Well, what would the opposite of that feel like? What's the polar opposite? What would the abundance of flow feel like coming into you and in your life? So whatever we're perceiving that we're lacking, heck, it could be, you know, I've been married to my husband 20 years, 25 years, 30 years. We just don't have any good sex anymore. There's no sensuality. The romance has got out. When you're looking at something that doesn't work or doesn't feel good, You can ask yourself 3 questions: what do I want? Why do I want it? And how do I want to feel? Been in a relationship for a long time, love my husband, I want more romance. Feel the energy of what romance feels like. Let yourself come from a place of, I totally feel supported, I'm so supported in my life, and really begin to create an energetic relationship with a different feeling because then you create a different reality from that feeling because your energy shifts into that new feeling. Yes.

Which is— I mean, the minute you started talking about joy and happiness, I mean, I was like, woo, woo, you know?

And then when someone—

when you mention lack and, and, you know, desperation, it's almost like, oh yeah, yes, yeah, I love that. Well, and you touched on Throughout that, you touched on kind of, you know, where you were at and where you are now, where your parents still are from a negative perspective.

Yeah.

And yet you also mentioned that when you got to a place where you really knew, you were really clear on what it was that you wanted— and gosh, what a fabulous, you know, place to be is knowing exactly what you want to be doing, because it becomes, you know, you become unstoppable.

Well, let me— can I share something really quick though? Because I know a lot of people might be like, I don't know what my purpose is. I don't know what my passion is. I don't know what my next step is. I didn't either. When I was talking about 15 years ago, yeah. But 20 years ago, before I wrote my first book, before I became a coach, so it was probably 21 years ago now, I remember sitting in my house and I was a pharmaceutical rep at the time. I was making great money. Had lots of success. I was married, had my dream home. Like, you know, I had everything again, and I realized I'm not passionate and I don't feel on purpose with what I'm doing as a career. You know, it's funny, I was a pharmaceutical rep, so I would go to doctors and tell them to prescribe all these different drugs and show them reasons and graphs and studies of why they should and all this kind of stuff. But if I got a headache, I was putting peppermint on my head. I don't take drugs. And so, for me to be a drug rep, right, it felt out of alignment. And so, I asked myself, what is it that I'm missing? What is it that I'm perceiving that I'm missing? And it was being on purpose and having passion for what I did. So, during that time when I didn't know what other forms to do, right, I started cultivating, I started meditating on the emotion and the feeling of passion and purpose on a consistent basis. And it was in less than a month that all of a sudden I had my picture in a meditation of my very first book, Perfect Pictures. And I went to bed that night, and 1:05 in the morning, I was woken up with a voice just talking in my head that I couldn't turn off. I got up, went in my office, put pen to paper, and my hand just started writing. It was automatic. It was like scribing. And I didn't know what was happening. But as I was kind of letting it happen, I was reading a couple words, and I was like, that's not me. I don't know where this is coming from.

Right.

And so I closed, closed it, went to bed, you know, next night, 1:05 in the morning, happened 7 nights in a row. And I'm like, I don't know what's happening. I think I'm writing a book. Right. So I got the inspiration to reach out to Terry Cole-Whittaker, who is a New York Times bestselling author. She was like the founder of one of the first ministers of New Thought Church 30 years ago. She used to teach Tony Robbins and, you know, all this stuff years and years ago., and I reached out to her. I said, I think I'm writing a book. What do I do? And so she goes, go online. Again, online was not online like it is now. Go online and find a literary agent. So I went into Google and I put literary agent, and this guy's picture pops up. He's a publisher and a literary agent. I reach out to him. He says, send me your manuscript, or notes that I was taking at 1:45 in the morning. That was, you know, and I sent it to him and he accepted it. Right. I got the book published, held the baby in my hand, and all my friends and family who were not the target audience for this book at all— they all thought I lost my cookies. They were like, oh my God, she's gone insane. So they were not the target audience for this. So I thought, well, where is my target audience? So I started speaking in spiritual bookstores and churches, and I started doing workshops, and people then started asking me to coach them. And they would say, oh, are you a coach? And I'm like, like a cheerleading coach? No concept of coaching, right? Didn't even know existed. And I was like, oh no, but call me on the phone. So I would have people calling me on the phone. I'd walk them through working with the universal laws and some exercises helping them move their energy. And then they would call me back or email me back these amazing stories of how they found the man, or they got out of debt, or, you know, their, their health got better or something. And I was like, God, I love this. I'm so passionate. I'm so on purpose with this. Oh, interesting. I didn't even know that was a career. I didn't even know it existed.

Right.

I've been following that passion and purpose for 20 years doing what I now do. So when I got to that place 5 years later where I'm like, okay, I'm a pharmaceutical sales training manager. I know this is what I want to do for the rest of my life, but I know what I do want to do. I would drive myself to work every single day and think about the positive aspects about my current situation, because there's a lot of things that I could have looked at as negative. Yeah, absolutely. And I knew that if I would stay in the negativity, if I stayed in the lack of it, I wouldn't attract what I wanted. And this thing that I wanted, a career as a coach, being home, being able to be, you know, create a family and, you know, be able to coach from home where I get to see my kids all the time when they're babies and all that. That was the vision. And so I'm driving to work, didn't even have a boyfriend because at this point I'm now divorced, right? So I'm driving to work going, oh, I'm so grateful for this job because I make a lot of money and I can have nights and weekends to coach. I'm so grateful for this job because I'm 15 minutes away from— it's a beautiful drive into work, 15 minutes away. I could go home. I'm so grateful for this job because I've got my friend that we can go get a tea in the afternoon. And I'm so grateful for this job because it's preparing me for the courses that I'll create someday when I am a coach, right? I would amp my energy up. And even though the first person I would see when I walk in the office was my boss, and we called him Eagle because he was always hovering around everybody, I wouldn't let Eagle upset me because I was just, someday, here's a positive aspect as I'm looking at him, someday I won't be here. I'll be my own boss. And so I kept my energy. I kept that, my consciousness in a place of already having created it, but not feeling like, oh, when's it going to come? Being impatient because that's lack. I had to be in the fulfillment, looking for the positive aspects of what I was experiencing now while getting excited about what was coming.

Right. Knowing that things come in time and they come when they're supposed to come. So acting desperate and in lack is not the way to attract it.

Well, when we are in a positive energy, when we're in joyful expectancy of it, when we're literally working with all the different principles that go step by step by step. You can't do one before the other. You have to go step by step by step. When you do that, then your desires do fulfill. You find yourself in the middle of going, wow, I desire that. Now I'm living it. And that's very, very exciting.

Very exciting. You got me all amped up. You got me all amped up. But I want to go back to that when you found your purpose, you knew it, you kept yourself positive and in that high energy, you know, space. And yet you had, you know, people maybe even other than your, your parents who were negative, kind of, you know, poo-pooing on what it is that you want.

Yes.

So how do you— how does someone that's out there that does have this yearning for more but yet they have all this noise around them. How do they keep— how do they prevent themselves from going right down into the muck?

So you don't allow yourself to attach to other people's opinions or worries or fears. So for example, what I would do is if my mom was like, oh, well, you know, blah, blah, blah, and her energy was like all in worry, I would say, well, that's an interesting perspective, because it allows her to have her perspective without me trying to change her or make her see my way. And I can just go, huh, okay, I get that you're afraid for me and I'm not. So, you know, I respect that and you can respect me that I'm— I've got this. Okay, okay, you know. And so when, when you can come from the perspective, and that's one of the laws I talk about, is the law of allowing. When you look at somebody else like you have to convince them in order for you to be happy, to believe what you believe, or for them to change, you're not in alignment, right? You're out of alignment, right? And but when you're in alignment, you're like, these are my desires and this is why I want them and this is lights me up. And I— and you can feel the energy and the fulfillment of it before it ever manifests. There is such a conviction there that you stay solidified in your own alignment and conviction and your own feeling because you're already having the experience of it. You're not waiting for something to happen. That's what most of us were raised with. If you want something, you want to be successful, you have to go do A, B, and C, and then—

right?

No, it's feel the success and then— right, right, right.

Oh, I love that. Well, and it's similar— would it— you— would you say it's similar to— and live as if you already have it?

Yes, there's a cap. There's, there's certain things, right? Some people think, oh, I'm going to live as though I'm already abundant, and then they go spend a bunch of money that they don't have. No, no, no, it's not about doing an action from that place. It's about feeling it. And then if you are inspired, if you get that inspired action— because action is one of the principles. We are, we're human beings. We are the action takers, whether we're gonna go take ourselves and go do a meditation that's an action. Or whether we're going to do something really big like run a marathon or get on stage or whatever it is, that's an action too. We're always action takers. Sometimes it's an internal feminine action, sometimes it's a more of a masculine, you know, action as far as moving something, doing something, right? Both of them exist, both of them are actions, and we need to take that. But any action taken from a place of worry, fear, doubt, lack will result in more lack. If you're taking action from a place of total alignment and you feel good taking that action, that action is going to warrant more benefits of feeling good.

Right. Yep. And who wouldn't want more good?

Well, we all want to feel good.

Yeah.

I mean, that's the reason that this book at this time came through me. And I channel the council, so I bring in a different awareness. And this book was channeled by the council with my Stories. And it's an important book for this time because it literally teaches you step by step by step. There, there's, you know, for, for many years people have been given pieces of the puzzle and then not putting the pieces in the right place, right? And I love about this is that it's step by step. It gives you the 7 principles, and don't do one before the other. You do them in the exact order, and when you do, you feel good. You get excited about your life again. You feel like beyond even hope, you're like, wow, right? It's like, wake up and enjoy your life, right? And that's what this book is doing for people right now. And regardless what the desire is, because the desire and allowing ourselves to have desires really is creation, and we're all creators. We want to be creating, we want our energy to flow, we want to feel good.

Yeah, wow. I want— I mean, I do feel good now. I felt good before I came here, but now I feel really good. Yay! But I do want to— I do want to clarify for those viewers and listeners who may not be as evolved, um, and when it comes to all of what it is that we're talking about, explain the council. And then, and then would you, uh, be able to share with us the 7 essential laws so we can at least have an idea as to what they are.

Yes. So really quick, the 7 Essential Laws are inside the book, but they're not the 7 steps.

Correct.

So I just want to share that. So you want me to share the steps? You want me to share the steps or the laws?

Oh, I'm sorry, the steps.

Okay, perfect. So, and then the council is, um, and it sounds always crazy when I say it, and I've, I, my teachers have always been channeled teachers for 25 years, but it still sounds crazy when I say it. But my consciousness goes out and higher consciousness comes in. It's like for someone that has like just a higher vision, they have that moment of clarity, like that higher, higher mind versus being in a lower mind, right? Well, I go beyond that where I'm not even in my mind. I literally exit my consciousness and the council comes in and their sense of humor and their wisdom and the energy and everything that comes with it. People just either go, whoa, I can't handle that, or oh my God, I'm in in love with them. So usually have two different type of reactions. People are like, okay, she's wackadoo and I'm out of here. Or other people are like, how can I get more of that?

I would have been the former 5 years ago.

Right.

I would have been looking at you like, what the heck are you talking about, Christy? But now it's like, I'm all loving it.

Okay. Yes. So some people, most people, I think the most mainstream is Abraham Hicks. Right. So Esther Hicks channels Abraham. That's what I do with the council. I channel the council.

Right.

So for those of you that are familiar with that, so the 7 steps though, did you have a question about that? Okay, perfect. So they're just amazing. It's just high energy. It's incredible information. I just feel so blessed to be able to bring their work out in the world.

Nice. Yeah.

And so they were the ones that said, here are the 7 steps in the exact order. It's coming from a higher consciousness. The first step is alignment. Meaning you have to know who you are and what you're connected to and where the desire comes from and to be aligned with that higher order. So for example, each of us that's alive right now— are any of you beating your own heart right now? I know I'm not. It's beating for me. My food is digesting, my nails are growing, my hair is like There is stuff going on inside of all of our bodies right now that none of us have to even think about. We don't put it on our to-do list. We don't have to check it off at the end of the day. It literally is happening without even us having awareness of it. And that happening is life. We're all alive. Well, what is that life? That life is energy. It's the divine. It's what some speak of God. It's, it's in us, or we would not be alive. And so it's that part of us that's energy, and, and we are connected to pure potentiality because of the fact that we are in a physical body having a human experience with life pulsating through us. And when we can align with that part of us, which always feels good— alignment with, alignment with abundance is alignment with the divine, because the, the divine, the energy of the divine never goes to lack of limitation. It's a human experience only, and it will never meet us in misery. It will only meet us in alignment. And so when we can put ourselves into a place of alignment— some do it through meditation, some people do it through energy work, some people do it through affirmations. There's so many different tools and things now. I mean, there's tapping, there's Ho'oponopono. I mean, there's an unlimited amount of tools that we have to help us get into alignment. And once we get— go ahead.

Nope, go ahead.

Okay, so once we get into alignment, then you have focus, right? We all have the mental capacity to focus. We're given these minds to focus. Are we focused on what we don't want, or we focus on what we do want? And staying focused on what we do want is absolutely essential. Then there's the principle of joyful expectancy. Once you're focused on that, are you expecting the worst to happen? Are you expecting it to fall through? Are you expecting that you are going to feel joyfully excited. It might take on a different form, it might look a little different, but are you excited about what's coming? And then the fourth principle is the principle of having, which is where you feel the energy now of what it is that you desire. And then next principle after that is loving it. Like, you're feeling abundant, you're just loving the feeling of abundance, or you're loving that feeling of being on purpose. This, even though the form hasn't come yet. You're just loving that experience. And then the next one is surrender. This is a big one that is all about detachment. Surrendering is not the white flag, giving up. Surrender is like, okay, there's resistance here and I want to hand over this resistance. I'm having some fear here. How do I process and surrender that fear so that I can come back in alignment? And then the last principle is—

Can I ask you something, Christy? Can I ask you something about surrender though? Because I get this a lot from, from clients. Um, they're in that point of desperation or lack, and they, you know, they're, they're sitting there and they're trying to acquire a client. They're trying to acquire a client, and, you know, and they get on this call and all they're thinking about is the end result, you know, is securing that client, is getting that client, getting that money. And would you say surrender also is where they have to kind let that go and just do the service and serving that they are, that they're called to do. Because when they do, and they're solely focused on serving, then they won't have to worry about what happens at the end of it.

That's exactly spot on. I mean, anytime you have any type of resistance, it could be worry. Sorry, my dog.

It could be—

that doesn't work. It could be worry, could be resist, you know, any resistance of any kind. Resistance is another way of saying It doesn't work. It doesn't feel good. If you could just literally resist, like let go and surrender a thought, you feel better, right? If you come back to, like you're saying, I'm in service, I'm letting go of all the other stuff, I'm surrendering, I'm detaching from that. That's, that's what we're getting. Okay, get out of the way of it.

Awesome. Awesome. All right, next.

So the last one was the principle of action.

Okay.

And that's where, you know, what I talk about in this book, as far as action is concerned, we, it's It's not about working yourself to your— just exhausted. It's not about working hard because we all know a lot of hardworking people that don't have what they want, that are unsatisfied, that are unfulfilled, that are still in lack. My dad was one of them. He worked until he was 85 years old and he had this perspective that nothing was ever going to work out. He was always in resistance, but he worked really hard 6 days a week. So if you worked hard, if working hard was the formula, then so many people would be successful, right? It's not just about working hard, it's about working with the fullness of who you are, putting yourself fully into an interview or a book or a conversation or an, you know, whatever it may be, business meeting. But you're taking that action not holding any of yourself back, but the fullness of who you are, doing the absolute best that you can do in that particular moment.

Right. Love it, love it, love it, love it, love it, love it. And I've been posting the website to where you can go and get one of her books as well as learn all about Christy.

Yes, I love her.

That cover just It matches the image, the artwork you have behind you. Yes, is thedesirefactor.com. But I also want her to talk about, because as we've been talking, it is about words as much as it is actions and thoughts and feelings and emotions and beliefs. And you have a free video series that you call Watch Your Words. So could you share a little bit about that for our viewers and listeners?

Absolutely. So for years, because we're talking about very esoteric principles. We're talking about energy. It's how do you hold that? It's concrete. People would ask me all the time, well, how do you start? What's the first practical thing that you can do? And I for years would say you have to watch your words. And then they go, well, what words? So I compiled a list of 30 words and phrases that pull our energy down, that leave us rooted in lack and leave us in struggle in that whole victim consciousness. There are 30 words and phrases that people say all the time and do not even realize what it's doing to them. So I created a video series. The videos are every day you get a video. It's 2 to 3 minutes, so they're quick. And you're told the word or the phrase to eliminate, why, and what to say instead, because it'll lead you towards your desires.

Nice.

I love that.

And so they can go to watchyourwords.com and sign up for that. And we get, we get one, one per day, you said, right? Yes.

Yes. And they're, they're 2 to 4 minutes. They're quick, they're fun, they're informative. Um, people that have gone through this program, literally it's like the spark that opens things for people because when you start changing your language, you change your life.

Well, because, and I would expect that there's a point where it all ties into what we're talking about in regards to real being conscious of your thoughts.

Yes.

Which is fueling everything else, especially your action or lack of action.

Yes.

Yes. Oh, so that's a great compliment. So watchyourwords.com. And, you know, because you can also keep those emails when you get them, the videos, and every 30 days you can cycle through them as you need them because these things take time, wouldn't you say?

Oh, yeah. And at the end of the 30 days, you get a printout that shows you all the words and phrases, what not to say, what to say. Instead. So you get a printout so that you get to put it wherever and it reminds you. Yeah. And exactly what you said. When you start paying attention to your words, what you're doing is you're taking time to go within to pay attention to yourself. So the words then become— you have more awareness on the thought that you're thinking or a belief that you have or a feeling. So just starting somewhere, even just watching your words and being aware of the words that you're saying, helps you become more aware of you, which is pretty much all it is anyway. Because when you are aware of you, when you are deliberately choosing your own consciousness and you're choosing to be in abundance, you will see your outer reality totally reflecting your consciousness.

Yeah, love it, love it, love it. All right, but one more reminder, you can hold up your book if you would. Thedesirefactor.com. Go pick up one of her books, please. And then also, I'm gonna throw everything up, and then check her out at christy— christywhitman.com and see how she could support you. Your life could be so different tomorrow, let alone 30 days, 60 days, 90 days, a year from now. So please check out her books, check out her free video series, Watch Your Words, and go to christywhitman.com to learn more about Christy. Christy, thank you so much for being part of the program. I have absolutely loved having you.

Thank you so much, I appreciate you, and thank you everybody for listening.

Oh, you are very welcome. And for everyone here in the Shedding the Bitch community, uh, we always appreciate you following us, whether that's on Shed the Bitch TV on YouTube Shedding the Bitch Radio on any one of your podcast streaming services and BlogTalkRadio, Shedding the Bitch Facebook and Twitter, and wherever you find— you find, uh, the important topics and experts that you're looking for so you can create the riches in your work and life that you deserve. So we'll check back with you next Tuesday at noon Eastern time for another episode of Shedding the Bitch Radio. Thanks everybody, bye!

Thank you for taking part in Shedding the Bitch Radio and TV with Bernadette Boas. We would love to know what your biggest takeaway was. Go to Shedding the Bitch on Facebook or YouTube and leave a comment. You can also subscribe to the show on Apple Podcast and YouTube so you don't miss a single episode of the show. And with your input, we can help other powerhouse women just like you find the show and decide if it's right for them. Learn more about Bernadette at balloffirecoaching.com. See you next week!