Clean out your LifeCloset with Corbie Mitleid

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That's Corby Mitlead, and, um, I will introduce her in a second. I'll bring her in in just a minute. But before we do that, I want to thank all of our new listeners and viewers. Of course, we broadcast, livestreamed through Shedding the Bitch Facebook page, as well as through BlogTalkRadio. So actually, we are live on BlogTalkRadio and Shedding the Bitch if you're there right now. On BlogTalkRadio, you could just scroll down on today's episode and there's a chat room if you want to talk with us. And of course on, uh, Shedding the Bitch Facebook page, you can certainly see our lovely faces and also, uh, comment and, um, ask any questions that you might have for Corby as we get into this discussion. But I want to thank all of you because as you are finding us through any of the streaming services on our Shedding the Bitch YouTube channel or on BlogTalkRadio or even sheddingthebitch.com, uh, you are providing us great feedback. Ratings, you're following us, and you're giving us great ideas for not only topics, but also those experts that you'd love to hear from. So I want to thank you and continue coming back every Tuesday at noon Eastern time when we bring you top of mind topics that you're dealing with in your career, business, or life. And if you ever have a suggestion for us, please email us at media relations ballafiremedia.com. I also want to thank those of you who've always stopped in and stayed a while each and every week throughout the number of years we've been broadcasting. And we are grateful for you. We're grateful for your sharing and again, rating and following and subscribing and commenting and helping us to get new eyes and ears on Shedding the Bitch Radio. So we sincerely appreciate that. We ask you to continue to do so. We're just getting started in 2021, and I'm so excited about that. Um, and we look forward to really bringing you some, you know, really awesome guests like our guest today. All right, uh, let me see. I also want to thank and let you know that this episode is being brought to you by North Georgia Tax Solutions. Debbie Snelling and her team provide full-service financial and tax services to small to corporate-sized companies all over the country, not just Georgia, all over the country. So please go to ngtaxsolutions.com and check her out. All right, and let her know I sent you and said hello. Okay, well, today's conversation, like I said, is going to be a lot of fun— cleaning out your life closet. My, you know, her whole thing, Korbi's whole thing, is the examined life. She is someone who has gone through 3 bouts of breast cancer, 2 divorces, dysfunction, poverty, abuse. Yeah, all of that. But the key is, what do you do with it and how do you teach with it? Clean Out Your Life Closet is made up of 4 parts: clarity, adaptability, simplicity, and stress. What's the key that makes this book different? Clean Out Your Life Closet encourages you to write your own story of change based on your history, your life experiences, and your personal goals. Through stories, examples, and just-for-you-designed adventure pages, you, you can find your own answers, design your own toolbox, and discover that healing the old and creating the new can be possible, joyful, and soul-satisfying. So what I wanted you to listen to, um, today, uh, is how she's going to share with you how you are your best expert. When you are on— when you are clear on your purpose, your relationships, and your spiritual ideas, you are ready to reclaim your life. When you look at life as a tiny house, you concentrate on what means the most for you, clearing your path. Now I can definitely talk to you all about that as well, and I'll talk to Corby about it as I downsize into this little 450-square-foot guest house. But when you make a stress— when you make stress a friend rather than a foe, you learn how to take it, take its lessons to make you and your life bigger, sweeter, and clearer. Now for Corby and for the rest of you, especially those of you who are joining us for the first or several times, what we kind of ground you into a rich question. And this is a question that is based on the topic we're talking about. So if you are at first are thinking, oh, well, I don't have to clean out my life closet. Well, we want you to really consider that pretty much everything that we cover here on Shutting the Bitch, you can relate to in some way, shape, or form. So this question will ground you in this topic and in this conversation. So by the time we're done, most likely our experts, especially Corby, will answer, will help you answer that question for yourself. So your rich question for today I want you to be thinking about is, what is it from your past that is holding you back in your present? So what is it in your past that's holding you back in your present? So let me introduce Corby. Corby Mitt Leid knows the value of the examined life. Through divorce, abuse, poverty, and life-threatening illness, she found that meeting challenges and asking the next question meant facing each situation with strength, courage, and humor. Today she brings a full toolbox to her work as an intuitive counselor, inspirational teacher, and speaker with a globe-spanning career and clients worldwide. Still, her clients treasure her attitude of I'm not special. 'You can do what I do. We have opportunities we can go after and challenges to get past.' She says firmly, 'My job is to give you the tools and courage to deal with both situations. Everything else is free will and up to you.' So please help me welcome to the show Corbi Mittlieb. Hi, Corbi, how are you? She'll be joining us in just a second. There she's popping in.

Hi there, Juan.

How are you? Good.

How are we looking?

Good. I love that avatar that you have. It's fabulous.

Thank you. That was, um, drawn by my dear friend Sonny Strait, who is the voice of Krillin on Dragon Ball and is a superb comic artist himself. But that's really what I do shows.

That's very, very cool. Well, I am so happy to have you on the show, and as well, I just adore this topic that you have that you're going to be bringing us. Um, so before we get into it though, let's learn a little bit about Korby and really kind of where not only your book, but where did your journey take you to where you're you know, in this place right now talking about cleaning your life closet?

All right, um, I was the different child in my family. My father was a cardiologist, my mother was an RN, my brother is a world-famous pediatric pulmonologist. I was an actress, I was a writer. So, you know, I mean, I could have stood on the table and recited Shakespeare and they'd still be talking about meds. So I kept trying to find myself, and it was a rather checkered road. Um, career has been actress, author, inspirational speaker, video producer, legal assistant, executive recruiter, comic book writer. Um, yes, I've been married more than once. Yes, I've had to deal with cancer. Yes, there's been abuse. Yes, there's been poverty. And I grew up a nice Jewish kid in Cherry Hill, New Jersey. I didn't expect that.

But hey, I'm from Philly. I'm from Philly. There you go.

Yeah.

All right.

Yeah. Um, the whole point with me is that I knew I had to live the examined life. You don't sit there and have a pity party. It's okay, this is happening. What do I need to learn? What's next? And I am by nature a teacher, not in a classroom, but a counselor and the school of hard knocks. So that's nice. That's where the book came from. Um, what do I do for a living? I'm an intuitive counselor. Some people say psychic medium, but I've been doing it for years. I have 1,200 people a year. I read books, radio, television, that whole thing. I said a couple of years ago, what are the subjects that you need most? And I got a list of about 36, 40 things, but the things that came up all the time were I need clarity. I need to learn how to simplify my life. I need to learn how to go with the flow. And oh my God, stress. So those were the first subjects I pulled for the self-development project, and that's the Clean Out Your Life Closet idea.

That is so cool. Well, I know also that you have this whole, um, kind of, uh, platform, I guess. That's not what I'm looking for, but of, um, why people spend so much time and money buying self-help books, and yet it is— and yet they're still in the same place today as they were when they read that book, and maybe even read it 2 or 3, 4 times. What is that all about? What is that all about?

It's called marketing and advertising, my darling. You've got this great book with a good cover and the sexy title, and a couple of people on the back say, oh my God, it's the best book in the world, and you get it home They're not speaking to you. There's one book that I bought that talks about you need to be vegetarian and stay away from gluten and you must meditate every day.

Excuse me?

I work 6 days a week, 15 hours a day. I live in a little bungalow in the middle of a 12-acre hayfield in a rural county in New York.

No.

And so the book went on the shelf, and that's what happens. The books look great, but they're not talking to you. They don't understand you. They don't validate your life experiences.

I said, right, right. Well, and through your divorces and through your, um, you know, battle with cancer— and yes, I understand that you just don't live in all of that— at the same time, obviously, cleaning out your life closet is about taking a look at all of that. Um, what was— was there an aha moment? Was there kind of like a point in time where all of a sudden you yourself— not forget about like wanting to help the other people— but for you yourself just said, I need to, I need to clean out my own life closet?

It was probably the third cancer dance. Now notice I'm not saying I fought cancer, because what you fight fights back, and I am not a survivor because I do a hell of a lot more than hang on by teeth and toenails.

Awesome.

When you are a dancer, you find out how graceful you can be under pressure. You avoid getting your toes stepped on and you get off the dance floor in one piece. So my third bout, which was a second primary, was in 2004. I'd just been finally married to the right guy for a year and a half. And the doctor said, well, three strikes you're out. We're taking the rack. And I was a 44 Triple D at this point with a tiny waist. "and we're taking the ovaries and we're taking you from this gorgeous figure to a fat fire plug with permanent side effects in 3 weeks. Suck it up." I'm normal. I went home and cried for 24 hours. But then what I learned back at the Option Institute in Massachusetts in the '80s was stimulus, belief, response. Find reasons to be okay with this. I didn't care how stupid they were. So I said, "Fine. You don't have them. You can't get cancer there." The top half is not going to get slammed in a refrigerator door at the doctor's, and every woman listening knows exactly what I'm talking about. Implants means I'll be perky till I'm 93. I can deal with that kind of a mindset. And of course, the great doctors at Mass General— I was out of the hospital in 3 days, shopped for a bathing suit in 5. I no longer look like what I looked like.

Why?

Right. I've discovered who I am without the crutch of looks. And that's when I said, so I got rid of that in a tough way. What else do I need to get rid of to be completely me? And that's when things just started to shove out the door.

That is powerful. Wow, that is unbelievably powerful. And I would— and would you agree that not all of us have to have that massive big, you know, kind of thing that happens to us.

I would hope not. I was just so stupid about things that the universe needed a big clue-by-four is what they needed.

Right, right, right. But other people might not that are, you know, listening or watching. They might just, you know, want to recognize these smaller things that are causing them to go, hey, pay attention here, this is an opportunity for you to— yeah, that's awesome. That is absolutely awesome. Now, apart from the fact that self-help books don't work because they're not talking to the reader about what it is that they're dealing with, when they do, I just, I need to ask you this because, especially being you're an intuitive counselor, which I love. Even if they do relate to it, what do you also find is the core reason why they may relate to it, they may think that they need to do something about it, because this person's talking to me, which I'm gonna, I'm gonna, you know, kind of conclude, everyone, you need to read her book, Clean Out Your Life Closet, because you'll probably relate and be able to see yourself in it. But then they kind of stop even then, and not kind of move forward. So how do you address that with your, your book, your story, to get them to take action?

One of the things that I make clear in the book and when I do my work, um, I jokingly say I'm not one of those psychics who thinks her aura don't stink. I'm not special. You can do what I do. And in order to prove that, at the end of each chapter, after you've read, you know, basically here's some of the things that I did that were stupid, here's a client who did the same thing, and you might want to think about this. At the end, I have what are called the adventure pages, which are open-ended questions. You can't get them wrong because I'm asking about your life. If you do all of those open-ended questions, by the time you read that book and finish it, that's your personal journal. Somebody else is going to read the exact same words but have a different journal because their experiences and understandings are different. I trust my readers more than a lot of self-help people do.

Oh my gosh, I love that! I love that. Okay, so you have to elaborate on that. So you trust them, blah blah blah blah blah.

You know, all of our lives as women, we're told we don't know. We have to talk to the fitness gurus, we have to follow the diet gurus, we have to learn how to clean our house from Marie Kondo, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And we're also taught not to know what we want either. See if this isn't familiar. You're 2, there's this big white thing and a big silver thing on top and you reach and your mother goes, "Bad, hot." Well, okay. But now you're 4 and there's a plate of cookies and you're a smart 4-year-old. You know there's more in the big one than the little one. So you reach for the big one and your mother goes, "Bad, and you're selfish." So you're not even going to get the cookie. She gives it to your little brother who eats it at you. And she compounds it by saying, "Besides, girls who eat cookies are fat, and nobody likes a fat girl. Do you really want the cookie?" So that by the time we're 5, we are subliminally taught if we trust ourselves or want anything, we're wrong, we're bad, we'll be punished, and we have to watch somebody else get what we wanted. So women are literally eviscerated.

Hmm.

I talk to women and they're in their 50s, and well, okay, fine, your kids are gone and Your husband is, is, he's gone. What do you want to do?

I don't know.

Because they never knew they were allowed. My book lets you own who you are. You don't have to make excuses, and what you change is your choice.

Right?

Yeah. Gosh, that's awesome. Is now, um, explain why adventure pages— why is it themed that? And just because it really pulled me into the whole thing. But adventure pages.

Because an adventure isn't right or wrong, it just is. This is the adventure. You get to meet yourself, you get to play with yourself, you get to play with old ideas, and you— there are no keys in the back of the book. You know, how many of us read the index? Well, what am I supposed to say? No, you don't get to do that. You're supposed to say what you want and you mean. I specifically made it so there were no right or wrong answers. None.

That's awesome, because there is— there isn't— there isn't any right or wrong answers when it comes to my life, your life, anyone that's listening or watching's life. Um, that is absolutely empowering. I love that. Now I know you also talk about, um, because here someone would be almost purging, what I call excavating their soul, but you know, into these adventure pages. Um, and you talk about clarity quite a bit. Why is that so important for somebody?

Well, if they're dirty, I can't see you. And if a telescope is dirty, you can't see that gorgeous conjunction of the two planets. And if your life telescope is dirty, you can't focus on what is important to you. So for me, clarity is a three-legged stool. You need to get clear on your purpose, you need to get clear in your relationships, and you need to get clear with spirit. For me, spirit is however you see God. I mean, Ralph the Wonder Dog, I don't care. The way I see God is he owns the grocery store and he does not care if you come in through health and beauty aids, the deli, or the floral. Just get in there. So however you see God does not matter for doing the book, right? Get clear with the fact that there's something else up there and how do you work with it.

Yep, absolutely. And yes, I, and I love that analogy with your glasses as I'm sitting here with a very kind of dirty one contact kind of squeezing every— oh God, I got moisturizer or something in it this morning and I'm like the whole morning I've been like trying to get it out and I can't seem to get it out. Um, now, okay, we've talked about the three-legged stool, uh, but simplicity, simplicity, I, I, I think it comes in a lot of different packages for different people. But, you know, how, how do you look at simplicity and what do you share with your clients, your readers, in regards to simplicity and how that brings so much Ah, to someone's life.

Well, you know, I, I am not a Marie Kondo, get rid of everything that doesn't bring you joy, like this. But look at what you've got and do look at what you use. Um, for instance, I have a pair of yoga pants that are so embarrassing that I can barely even wear them to the bathroom, but they're so comfortable and I keep them. Um, let's take someone, you've got 3 kids. Do they all need their own copies of the Harry Potter series? No. Simplify down to one. Um, I, I'm a cook, so my kitchen needed simplifying. And you look and you say, what pans do you really use? I sentimentally kept one of my mother's frying pans from 1946. It's aluminum. We don't use those now. So it's a matter of finding what you treasure, but finding what is also useful. You know, yes, everybody should have their own toothbrush. Not everybody needs their own copy of Harry Potter, is how I put it.

Oh, that is so true. I have to share very quickly that I had mentioned my 450-square-foot. I love— when I read, you know, about your book, and when I read excerpts, and I was looking at, you know, the series of questions we were going to be talking about, and we got to this subject of simplicity. I can't tell you, not only you, Corby, but you know, all of our listeners and viewers, when I downsized for many reasons from my main house into my guest house and into a 450-square-foot, you know, space, and I had to, I mean, I was forced to purge and get rid of, and you know, I didn't even put things in storage. Oh my gosh, it was the most freeing, liberating thing. I ever went through, thinking that I needed all that junk, and I really just didn't. I mean, I held on to a few things, obviously, that some other person might say, well, that's just frivolous. But at the same time, it was extremely freeing, extremely freeing.

And you know, you might find— I was given a gift once that was beautiful, but it really wasn't me. I gifted it this Christmas to someone who thinks it's just the most gorgeous thing they've ever seen. Yeah, that's not white elephant. That is, I kept it till I knew who would love it and gave it to them, right? So how much of what you no longer need could make somebody else's life easier, better, more fulfilled? Yeah, don't be a fairy godmother.

Yeah, right. Well, when I'm— I took like 99% of my stuff to Goodwill, and I'm like, just, you know, I just felt so grateful to be able to you know, help someone else with the things that I no longer, you know, needed. And I definitely wanted to simplify. Um, now, how can you clean out happiness? Does it ever really, you know, does it even get messy?

Mm-hmm. Oh, sure. I'm 65 now, going to be 66 in March. I don't know what happened. Um, but well, the thing is, when you've never had kids, you're just the biggest kid in the room and you don't feel time passing. There you go.

Me too. Me too.

How many dreams have we had? Um, I used to want to learn to speak German fluently and write a World War I fiction book and do this and this and this and this and this, plus all the things that my family wanted for me. Gee, I'd be happy if I did all that. But you know what? That's who I was. You have to allow yourself to look at what you thought was going to get you some happy, and if it doesn't anymore, like a dandelion, blow it away. Um, for a while I was really focused on getting a reality show, and I was this close, but I realize now, especially with the condition of the world today, I don't want fame. I don't want high profile. I want to do my work. I want to help people heal. And I'm completely content in my little 864-square-foot bungalow in the middle of a hayfield in upstate New York.

Nice, nice.

So yeah, and you'd give it away without guilt, without I should have— no, that was then, this is now, gone. Take your Etch A Sketch and clear it.

Right, right. Well, and I think many, you know, I hope, uh, many of those listening and watching who have been kind of struggling with that as well, because people get comfortable, right? I'm sure you see that all the time. They get comfortable thinking that that happiness is all the happiness that is out there for them and/or that they need. And so if they can get comfortable with giving up some of those things they think make them happy, they— I mean, like I said, it's just so freeing and liberating. Yeah, that's awesome. That's awesome. So where else can one simplify their life apart from apart from either possessions or they're looking at their happiness? Where else can one simplify?

Well, you get physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual all have their own ways of doing it. I talk in there, for instance, about carry experiences, not things. And, um, I explained that there are certain kinds of people. There are the, um, thing people They are the ones who have to collect. A perfect example of that was Elton John. For years, '60s, '70s, '80s, his house was, you know, chock-a-block. You could barely move. Then he woke up to the fact that I don't need this anymore, cleared it. Then you have what I call the Rolodex people, which is terribly out of date, but for, for those who don't know, from us old people, a Rolodex used to be this big card file you had on your desk., and it had, you know, names and addresses, etc. And the bigger your Rolodex, the more powerful you were. So those are people who kind of collect people. Then you have the been-there-done-that people. They're the ones that have to go to every new restaurant opening. They're the ones that have to be seen at the right places. And then you have people who are the connection people. If they get great joy out of sitting down with a homeless person and having a sandwich with them, that's what they carry. They carry the experience here. They don't need— I mean, when you're dead, look at a lot of us. I have all of my parents' furniture and my mother's china, and I love it. We don't have kids. Who's going to want it? Nobody these days. But you have your experiences, and you pass on the stories. Now, that's a gift that can always be given and treasured. So there's a difference.

Always, always. I love that. And stories, life, you know, their experience, one's experiences, one's history. Um, yes, I absolutely, absolutely love that. Now you talk about perfection in your adapt— adaptability section. Why is, why is that such a problem?

It's a problem. Well, I, I do it facetiously and I do it with a story of my own parents. Um, the, the serious part of it is because my grandmother had her idea, and God bless Nana Dorkin, we always said she may be wrong but she was never in doubt. She knew exactly who she wanted her son to marry and what she wanted that life to be about. Uh, we joke about when she was pregnant she kept trying out first and middle last names to see what would be great with Dorkin, MD, because dad was going to be a doctor. We whether he wanted to or not. I mean, it was, it was the Jewish joke. Um, Dad fell in love with my mother, um, when he was in med school and she was in nursing school in Baltimore. And believe it or not, they met over a spilled bedpan in the supply closet. Is this romantic or what? But my mother came from an immigrant family who had a little grocery store and they lived above the store. This was not what my grandmother wanted for my father. And so when Dad first brought Mom home, it was a declaration of war. And her entire life, my grandmother did everything she could to destroy my mother because she wasn't the perfect match. Now, hmm, let's take something more facetious. I want to make dinner for my husband, and I have 8 of the ingredients and another 3 I don't. Well, if I— and I'm not going out during the pandemic to run to the store. So I can either go, oh, it's all ruined, or I can say, okay, I've been a cook since I was 4. How can we play with this? And those are things that may never show up on the table again. We call them Beef TR or Chicken TR, Pork TR, TR standing for Teddy Roosevelt, who said, do what you can with what you have where you are. And I may never have that combination again, but my husband has never turned up his nose at it.

You have a good husband.

You have a good one this time.

That's hysterical. So what, what do you— what is it about perfection, especially for women? What is it about perfection that they cling so tightly to, yet at the same time talk about something that, you know, they need to purge or, you know, clean out?, because it's really not serving them at all. But what is it that is driving that?

Look at fashion. Look at all of the extreme makeover things. Um, look at the cliquishness we all had in high school. You had to have the right clothes, listen to the right music, be in the right places. Um, guys are taught to have rugged individuality. Women are supposed to be like this. You know, as I say to my friends, wrong answer. Um, and that's the problem. Um, I'm not classically pretty. I'm not. But neither do I feel the desperate need to wear makeup anymore. I used to do Mary Kay sales in the '80s, and I changed makeup 4 times a day. That's enough. I'm finally getting used to the fact that, yes, I do look like an elder stateswoman, so live with it. Um, you know, I, I finally— I'm not crazy about cameras, or haven't been in the past. I'm getting used to it now. And it is what it is. As we get older, what you're bringing forward that is perfect is how you've lived, what you have to say, your squint on the world, not what you look like.

Right?

Please.

No, it's, it's Oh my God, I can't tell you how true, true. Well, and you know, and I'll just share one little thing with you. I, you know, this eye droops. And so when I started doing camera work, and I've been doing it for a good number of years, 8 or 9 years ago, a friend of mine was like, why would you want to get on camera when you're, you know, you have a drooping eye? And I'm just like, I'm sorry, what?

Like, I'm like, I didn't notice it. It's like I say, oh, I have starting lines around my mouth. Nobody's looking at that. They're listening to my words and they're like, nothing, right?

And even if they did notice it, and like you said, you know, like, even with all the fashion and stuff out there, the perfection that's out there, I got into the point— and I swear to God, we're like sisters from a different mother or something— because I got there, you know, got to a point where I could, you know, if someone, someone's trolling me and kind of judging me and hating on me, I just laugh, you know, because it's, it says more about them than it does about me. And, you know, so it's just you know, whatever.

I give my clients what I call my two magic phrases: thank you for sharing, you may think that if you wish, and then you go do what the hell you want.

Wait, what was the second one?

Thank you for sharing that if you wish. Thank you for sharing, you may think that if you wish.

Oh, that's great, that is great. All right, well, you talk about, you know, a lot about going with the flow, but you say there's also places where you should stay stand your ground.

Right.

Can you talk about that?

Absolutely. Um, if anyone tries to push you to do something you don't want to do, if anyone tries to put you in a dangerous situation, if anyone threatens you mentally, emotionally, whatever, not only no, but hell no. You know, a lot of women— it's one of the things I say to a lot of women, are you any good at saying no? And they fumfa around and I hand them my magic postcard right there. "No is a fabulous idea." How many times, "Well, you really should learn to say no, darling." That's going to be omega brain. It's not going to go through. But a phrase like, "No is a fabulous idea," that they win. And then I give them the postcard and say, "Put it on the fridge." Right. Um, you know, compromise is okay, but for instance, With one of the, the other reasons that I decided reality show wasn't for me is they wanted me to change too much. I am the kind of reader I am. I am not going to say, yes, I am so amazing, I am the only one in the United States that can do this, you must watch my show, and, and no, because that is complete antithesis to what I want to tell people, which is you can do what I do. We're all wired like the same house plan. It's your circuit breaker. Mine is all the way shut, so all the power flows. The ones who think what I do is the devil's work, it's on locked and rusted shut. But if you always know who's on the phone 2 minutes before they call, honey, you've got a leak in the system. You think you have nothing, but you do. Yeah, that's my reality, and I will not compromise on that.

That's beautiful. And that is also, uh, I kind of go back to your Venture Pages. You know, because obviously, as someone's answering those open-ended questions into their adventure pages, they're finding who their true essence is and where they ground.

Yes.

And therefore not compromise and not, you know, give up any part of themselves just for somebody else who really, quite honestly, doesn't care.

Yeah. You know, I talk in there about what I call the sentence of passion. The sentence of passion is not who you are or what you do or even how you do it. It's your vapor trail. When you go skidding to heaven on bald tires and fumes in the tank and God hands you a beer and says, "So?" You get to go, "Look at this! I did this! Isn't it cool?" And it isn't the job. Mine is cross the bridge from fear to fearlessness and fly. When I can take somebody from point A to point B when they thought they couldn't make it and say, "Here are your wings. You don't need a flight plan. Now get." I'm living my passion. Right. That is not something that a psychic is going to tell you. You ask me what's my purpose in life, I'll say, honey, you've got some work to do. Because how many times do we try to be what other people say we should be and we're half living? Yeah. No, you direct your own life. That is the only way it's going to work.

Love it, love it. Ladies, are you listening? Are you listening to her? And I also, um, as I'm also trying to find my next questions, I also want everybody to go to corbymitlade.com, and that's—

and you pronounced it right! God bless you, women. Most people screw up the last name.

Well, I did initially when I first said you were coming on, then I went to correct it in the intro, and then I've been repeating it in my head most of the time. But so corbymitlade.com, and that's M-I-T-L-E-I-D.

Yes, it's a German word. It means compassion. It's a chosen last name to remind me why I do the work.

That's awesome. That's— and you also, you definitely absolutely want to get her book, Clean Out Your Life Closet. So take a look on her website, um, and, uh, look her, look her up and be sure that you're taking advantage of kind of telling your life story. And whether, whether or not you pass it on to anybody else, people— because I talk to a lot of women who are like, well, I really don't want to tell anybody about my, my life story. This isn't about that. This is about you discovering you and leveraging that to, you know, find your full happy life. Um, all right, so I definitely want to talk about stress. And you say that— and you say that stress is a comp— complicated friend.

Yeah.

Okay, so can stress ever be a friend?

Has to be, because we're never going to have a life without it. Okay. There's something called eustress, E-U-S-T-R-E-S-S. That's good stress. That's what happens when you're about to go on stage. And it happens when you're about to take a test that's going to open up your life. Or you're in the docket getting ready to run a race. Those are all good things. The chronic stress is when you say no— when you say yes when you want to say no, when you're trying to multitask. You know, on my YouTube channel, I just have a new video called Spiritual Time Management, and the 5 things we all get wrong are multitasking, double thinking, techno toxicity, me lastness, and exhaustion. So those are all things that give you stress. The more you can say, well, this is where things are going, how can I move forward, the better off you are. Perfect example with me. I used to be nicknamed the Travel Channel. 'cause I was on the road 45 weekends a year. And then about, the universe had an idea of what was gonna go on in 2020. So 2 years ago, all of a sudden, a lot of the shows started dropping off and I was a little panicked. And then the next year, herniated disc, pinched nerves, man, it makes having a baby look like a tea party.

Agony.

But when I finally got well again, the doctor said, "You are toast." you will not be able to load in, load out anymore. You're not going to spend 10 hours in the car. So I had moved all of my business online, and then when the pandemic hit, I was in the catbird seat. One more change. You ever hear that old expression, I was in the catbird seat? It's an old expression. Um, so I had shifted my business to the point where everyone who only relied on shows was scrambling, and I was just sitting right there because I had moved forward into the change that the— what the universe was showing me. I took the stress off myself. So that's one of the ways you can mitigate stress.

Yeah, and, and use stress in your favor as opposed to against you.

That's right, that's right. How can I reinvent me?

Right.

What doesn't change dies. You are going to change. You might as well enjoy it.

Well, yeah, change is the most predictable thing, right? I mean, yes, it's going to happen. I mean, no matter what. And we don't need a pandemic or any type of huge national worldwide type of situation. We don't even need something kind of in our community. Um, you know, something could happen to us just individually, and, uh, change will, will And we want it, right? Don't we want to change until the day we're put into that, you know, into the grave and 6 feet under?

It's one of the things I loved about my father. I always said if this was his brain, this corner was missing, because to the day he died, new information came in and he'd always look at it. So I kept him young.

Yeah. And, oh, I love that. It keeps you young, you know, which they, which they talk about a lot when it comes to, you know, seniors and whatnot.. But at the same time, whether you're 20 or 80, you should want to just constantly be curious. You know, it's, it, you know, everybody wants to be a child again because children are curious and they're not afraid and they take chances and they're okay with screwing up and they just find it funny actually.

Think about a room where the windows are always closed. The air is stale. You open up a window and all of a sudden you can breathe again. It is the same thing with welcoming in ideas.

Yep, absolutely. I love that. I love it. Okay, so say someone is about to— they bought your book and they're about to open it and they're about to get into it. What would you, what would you share with them? What would you tell them? What would you, you know, inspire them on?

I would say thank you for buying the book. Um, please have fun. Nobody died and made me God. As I say about psychics, even the best of us are 85% accurate. The only one 100% accurate is God, and he's not doing psychic fairs this week. Um, explore, scribble in the margins. I mean, if you look at the book, I gave you big fat margins to write in. Highlight things, argue with it, however it takes for you to engage in the book. Do it and have fun. And I always remind people Remember to think like a Martian detective. Now, what's a Martian detective? Um, let's say that— well, you remember Marvin the Martian, the guy with like— all right, so fine, he comes down in from planet Zorch and he's looking around and he is absolutely delighted. He has no idea about anything here at all. He's terribly curious, so he's only going to ask about what he sees. He doesn't have a backstory. How do I explain that? If you had water coming out of your eyes, I might say, "Why are you crying?" But I could be wrong because maybe you have allergies or maybe it's that darn contact lens or maybe there's an emotional basis. Okay. Um, the Martian would look at you and go, "Why is there water coming from your eyes?" That's all he's asking. And so he can get to the right answer faster. Because there's no judgment and there's no preconceived notions.

That's, that's very cool. That is very cool. And everyone, I want to remind you, please go get her book. Please, please, please go get her book. Go to corbymitleid.com. That's M-I-T-L-E-I-D dot com. And, uh, can they buy it anywhere else other than on your site?

Well, if you want the, uh, actual Paperback version, yeah, that's at my site. But if you go to Amazon, paperback, um, Kindle, and I did the audiobook. Ah, I feel it's very important if it's a non-fiction story that the person who wrote it with passion is the one who's telling you this story. So yeah, in my voice.

That is— that's awesome. Okay, and then at the same time, guys, purchase her Clean Out Your Life Closet. And get a digital copy of her second book, The Psychic Yellow Brick Road, for free. Now, would that be only through your website?

That would be the— what you do is, if you're buying my book, send me a picture showing, you know, the Kindle or whatever, and that way I'll have your email address and I will immediately send you the copy of The Psychic Yellow Brick Road.

That's awesome, that's awesome. All right, and, and then at the same time, uh, can you speak to— she has some January special offers at her website. You can go to corbymitlade.com/january-special-offers. Uh, what can they find there?

All right, and by the way, you can also just scroll down the first page, you're going to see a button says special offers. Hit the button. For years people have been saying 'Can you ever do a reading where I'm not on the phone with you, you just tell me things?' And I finally said, 'Fine.' So there are certain ones for important times in your life. I've got a birthday read, I've got anniversary, wedding days, Mother or Father's Day. And what I do is, um, I tell you what's ahead for the year, and you will get an MP3 recording from me so you'll at least hear the voice. And I also have a new report called Your Luck Factor. Now, this is not giving you permission to go to the casinos, but I know a lot of you do. So it basically tells you where the luck is in your life and what the good numbers are for 2021. And so just go and have fun. It's a good way to get a feel for who I am. You should never buy a psychic pig in a poke. Yeah, uh, but that's part of the Yellow Brick Road book that tells you how to find a decent Psychic and How to Get the Best Ever Reading.

Yeah, well, but at the same time, everyone, I mean, come on, you can't not say that you love her just from this conversation. I mean, you know, like I said, sisters from a different mother. Just absolutely, absolutely love it. And, um, but there was something that I wanted to— oh shoot, there was something that you had said in that little piece that I wanted to ask about. I'll remember it and then ask you and share it if it, if it is important to everybody else. Um, all right, and I want to remind everybody too, um, you can reach out to her directly, corby@corbymittlade.com. Her Facebook handle is the same. She makes it really easy for us.

Where they should go is firethroughspirit.com. That's got all the really interesting spiritual stuff. Corby Mittlade— I talk about my cats and I don't want to do laundry today. You don't need to know Awesome.

Thank you for correcting that. Fire Through Spirit. And then Twitter is Corby Midline.

Twitter is Corby Midline. Uh, Instagram is Corby Midline. Yes, YouTube is Corby Midline.

Okay, any last, any last comment or tip for our viewers and listeners? Yes, fabulous.

I know the world is crazy right now, my darlings. I really, really do. But the way we find balance is starting with ourselves. If you're confused, you can't help other people stop being confused. If you're in pain, it's tougher to stop other people being in pain. You know, they use the expression spiritual warrior, and it doesn't mean— what it means is fighting the fears, fighting the doubts, Fear equals false evidence appearing real. Fame equals full acceptance means everything. So do you want to be fearful or famous in your own life? That's the whole thing.

Awesome. And I did remember my question that I had. You just triggered it again. So that was awesome, and that is a great tip to end with. But I do want— being that you are a psychic and everything, um, what do you— what are you you know, kind of seeing for the world, or at least even for the US, but for the world in 2021?

We're never going to go back to 2019, my darlings. We simply are not. This is where you have to run toward change. This is where you have to simplify. Look at all the stuff that you did before. Now that you were in lockdown, you stripped it down to bare. What do you want to bring with you that really means something in 2021? How can you reach out to reconnect with people? How do you realign your own world? It's crazy out there. We need each other. Remember that the best relationships are 60/60. Each party goes a little more than halfway, and it's that extra 10% that locks it in tough times like now.

Oh, I love that. I love that. I love that. Oh, this has been fabulous, Corby, and I can't believe how Quickly the time flies. This was absolutely fabulous, and what a way to kick off the year too. I know we're a week or so in, but what a way to kick off the year. Thank you so much.

It was a pleasure.

Yo, thank you. And I do want to remind everybody, corbymittlade.com, Clean Out Your Life Closet. Definitely pick it up, definitely pick it up. Get into those adventure pages. Um, you'll, like she says, have fun. You'll have a ball. And I'm so grateful, grateful, grateful for meeting you.

My pleasure, truly.

Yeah, everyone, thank you so much for joining us today. And/or if you're doing, um, seeing us on a replay or a download, you can go to our Shed the Bitch TV channel on YouTube, also on BlogTalkRadio, on iTunes, anywhere you get your streaming services, and of course on sheddingthebitch.com. And I want to thank Corby. I want to thank all of you for being here, and I'll look forward to having you back next Tuesday at noon Eastern time. Thanks everyone. Thanks Corby.

Thank you for listening to Shedding the Bitch Radio with Bernadette Boas. Join Bernadette every Tuesday at noon Eastern as she helps you shift your bitches to riches. And the dialogue is always going on at sheddingthebitch.com. See you next week.