Don't Fall Victim to the Super Woman Syndrome with Andrea Arena

Andrea Arena, founder of Times Squared Concierge, talks about Superwoman Syndrome: the pressure to excel at work, home, and community all at once. She had panic attacks and adrenal fatigue from trying to do everything. Her fix: calculate your hourly value, delegate ruthlessly, say no, and schedule personal time like you'd schedule a meeting.
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818-572-2910. We are in studio with our guest today, Andrea.
Yes.
Yes. Hey! Andrea Arena. Okay, let's dive into this because I love this subject. My sister bought me a book of Superwoman, and it wasn't the Superwoman Wonder Woman thing. It was about business, and I was only in my mid-20s. And she said, you're already a super— you know, you've got that Superwoman syndrome. So that's what we're talking about. Don't fall victim to the Superwoman syndrome. You don't know what it's about? Guess what? We're going to tell you. We're going to talk all about it. It's about as accomplished women, we think we have to do it all. But attempting to do that can leave us feeling like we don't do anything well. Alright, who can relate to that?
Raise your hands, come on, come on, come on.
How do we overcome this? How do you overcome it? Well, today we're gonna talk about several things. We're gonna talk about how to give yourself permission to outsource that which is not core, and I love this conversation. So, how to outsource. The fact that you're not alone in feeling overwhelmed. So you have to realize that you aren't alone, you're not on an island all by yourself. Other women are right there and our guest is going to share with you how you can leverage that in order to kind of give yourself a breathing room and consider what they're doing, what other women are doing to work for them that you might be able to do. That not shirking your responsibilities by outsourcing. So a lot of women feel as if they hire or delegate or outsource, they're not kind of being the mother, the career woman, the business owner, the friend, the wife, the spouse, the partner, whomever that they should be. And you know, there's a big "Ah, yes you are." When you focus on your core responsibilities, you make the greatest impact. Kind of self-care, right? Self-care ideas. Alright, so your rich question today that we want you to be thinking about, and seriously thinking about this, is in what area of your life are you overwhelmed? And you can't say all of it, alright? You know I don't let you off that easily. I want you to pick one. Consider all the areas of your life, jot them down, and pick one that you know you're overwhelmed. And think about it and consider what you're willing to do about it because Andrea is gonna give us tons of tips and pieces of advice that you can leverage immediately in order to focus on that one. And start with just one and she's gonna go into all of that. You don't have to start with everything. And rich tag with us. You can rich tag Superwoman, rich tag self-care, or rich tag shed the bitch, of course. Alright, so when we get back, I'm gonna formally introduce you to our guest and then we're gonna dive into this question, but I want you to be thinking about what is that one area of your life that being a superwoman is fine, but you also have to take care of yourself if you're gonna be that person. We'll be right back. Welcome back everyone, welcome back, welcome back. I am in studio and talking with our fearless Andrea Arena. Say hi.
Hi!
She is the President and CEO of Times Squared Concierge, a company she founded after the successful sale of her previous business, Two Places at One Time, Inc. Two Places was the nation's first provider of employer-subsidized corporate concierge services. After founding Two Places in 1991, Andrea expanded the Atlanta-based firm to locations throughout the US and Canada and garnered the honor of being named to Inc. Magazine's 500 fastest-growing privately held companies in the US for 2 consecutive years. In addition, she was selected as one of Catalyst Magazine's top 50 entrepreneurs for 2002 and top 5 for 2000. Accomplished, aren't you? Yes, you are. Andrea currently lives in Atlanta, Georgia with her daughter.
Woo-hoo!
Welcome, welcome, welcome. Thank you, it's such a pleasure. Yes, it's great to have you. Now, I don't know that it noted, and I want to note it, how long— when did you start Times Square Concerts?
Um, it's almost 2 years old.
All right, fabulous.
So second go around.
Second go around. Oh, you'll rock it because you obviously did very well the first one.
But the bar is higher, right? The second go around, it's like how much bigger, faster, stronger.
You're a superwoman, but in the good sense.
But in a good way.
In a good sense, in a good sense. All right, so while we're talking, everyone, I want you to get to her websites and really kind of connect with her as we're talking. All right, so go to timesquareconcierge.com, or you can just Google Andrea Arena, you're gonna find her everywhere. But I do want you to know that her Facebook page is Times Square Concierge, Twitter handle is @YourTimesSquare. Okay, Your Times Square. Squared. So basically she's trying to square up, double, triple, quadruple your productivity and your time. Time squared. Isn't that creative? That's so creative. Alrighty, considering your rich question, everybody, we're gonna dive into this. Okay, help me understand, because obviously you must have been one of those professionals who was overwhelmed yourself and therefore said, oh my God, I gotta do something. And you decided to do something, not only for yourself but other people. Describe what overwhelm looks like so we can all relate.
It's, yeah, you've been there, you all can answer the question better than I probably, but overwhelm for me literally looked like having to pull off the interstate in the middle of a panic attack in my early 30s. I had a constant eye twitch, a constant, which I actually believed was normal. Oh, you got to the point where you thought it was normal? Yeah, I thought everyone, oh, everyone's eye twitch. I just haven't noticed it in others.
I have a drooping eye, but—
Yeah, I mean, it was so insane. The lack of sleep, the, you know, the mind constantly racing. Yes, I actually got, for me, it got severe. I was actually diagnosed with adrenal fatigue. And that's when your doctor actually says to you, you're doing permanent damage to your body. You may think this, oh, well, it's just, you know, running my business, I'm real busy, I'm a working mom, you know, I'm just gonna push through this finite period of time and then, then I'll give myself permission to take a break, to do something for myself. He's like, at that point, you've already done permanent damage. Irreparable damage. Why would you go there?
Right.
What is the cost of that?
Right.
Right? And then when I realized that not everyone had the eye twitch, but they, something close to it, right?
Sure.
I certainly wasn't in this boat alone. And it's not just women.
Right. Right? Right.
But women bring a very special component to it, I think. And it is the superwoman syndrome. So actually when I started my business, there weren't as many women. In the workforce as there are today, right? Okay. Then, and most of my, more of my clients were male, and then all of a sudden more and more women started entering the workforce, but somehow their responsibilities at home, they didn't lag behind. They were responsible for being a superstar at work and carrying the brunt of the work load at home.
Right.
How is that possible?
Right.
And then we as women, we, we absorb all of that and take— we take on it. Literally, I believe I take on the responsibility of everything within a 10-mile radius of me. Whether— whether—
that's a great illustration.
Honestly, it's true. It's true. Think about it. It's my responsibility to handle everything within at least a 10-mile radius, right?
Right.
I mean, it's kind of crazy.
Yeah.
So it's this— and it's not only do you— are you Do you think you have to do it all? You have to do it all perfectly. And as a result, beginning, of course, dog tired, can't sleep, all of the craziness. But in addition, you leave feeling like you haven't done anything well. So there's no win in that equation.
Right, right, right. Well, and the thing that I need to kind of help everyone to understand is why— and this is going to sound silly, but why? Why are women doing this to themselves? Because that's what they need to get under, right? Is to really understand, why am I doing this when there's so many other options? Which we'll talk about options and tips and advice for getting yourself out of that state. But why do you feel, based on all your clients that you've had, that they operate the way they do?
Most superwomen feel that they actually measure their self-worth based on productivity. How many things have I checked off my list? How many things have I accomplished today? Someone asked me, um, wouldn't it be better to be a human being than a human doing? That, right?
Oh, I like that. Human being versus human de-doing.
Did that hit a chord with someone in the room?
Yeah.
Not naming names or anything.
And I don't even have kids or a husband.
I mean, we wake up every day and have to convince ourselves that we are worthy by what we have accomplished.
Yeah.
Yeah. That's insanity.
Right.
I guarantee you men don't do that.
Right, right.
And where does it come from? Does it come from a low self-esteem? Does it come from our upbringing of we are to do? It is our responsibility to do. It is our responsibility to keep a perfect home. It is our responsibility to have perfect, well-educated, beautiful, well-dressed children with their hair brushed. The hair brushing, I would debate.
Let those kids go out with messy hair.
I'm thinking every other day. Sometimes some days I'm going to go with every other day. That may not be a battle worth fighting in my house.
But wouldn't you say, and do you help your clients in such a way to realize that yes, even though this might have been the social norm for centuries, you can't even say decades or generations, but for centuries, it doesn't make it right. It doesn't make that any different. It doesn't make it that it's the norm.
But what it does make is that it is— no one's going to give you work-life balance, right? It's not in the script to provide work-life balance, right? So you have to create it or demand it yourself. Right.
Okay. Yeah, absolutely. So, okay, so I, um, yes. So let's start off with— and we're going to cover like tips all throughout this conversation. So let's just start off with the one thing that they could be doing to where it's not, to where they can change that demand? What can one thing that they could start doing?
To me, one very, I say easy, some of you are going, she's gotta be kidding, thing that you can do, so recognize most of us are not ER surgeons, okay? So every single email you get is not—
Curing cancer.
Yeah, incredibly urgent, right? And aren't we setting an expectation and then it is 10 o'clock at night and we get an email from work and we immediately respond. We respond by 10:02. Now we're setting an expectation that she's gonna respond within 2 minutes. Right. At any time, no matter what she's doing, no matter what space she's in, whether it's her home space, her parenting space, her spouse space, she's gonna respond within 2 minutes. So I say, you have set that expectation, You stop it. So stop responding, be diligent about setting your own boundaries. We are horrible as women. I know that's a huge blanket statement, but generally we're not great at setting our— now we may be good at setting boundaries for our children, right?
Right.
But setting boundaries for ourselves, we're not good at that.
Well, doesn't that come to— doesn't that kind of come back to their ability to say no?
Yes, absolutely, absolutely. And I mean, sit on your hands if you have to. Sit on your hands. You can't be the first to raise your hand and volunteer for everything. I get it. And they're all worthy causes, absolutely. The PTA is important. Girl Scouts, important. But you can't do it all, and you can't do it all well. Yeah.
And if they would just learn, even just to start, even come up with one a day, just say no once each day.
The change.
What changes do you see your clients experience even if they just did that?
If you journaled, if you had a no list, like on your notes on your cell phone, if you had a no list and each day you wrote down, you have to have one entry per day at a minimum of a time that you said no, and not only do you write down what happened, but write down how you felt about it. Because at the beginning it might be angst and anxiety and how you've disappointed the entire society because you said no to the PTA or you refused to bring cupcakes. I mean, okay, life without cupcakes, I get it. It is a sad world, but it can't be your responsibility every single time. So not only write down what you say and when you say no, but how it made you feel, and watch the trend. Is it easier? Do you feel lighter? What do you do with that time? I think it's— and please turn off the alerts. Do you get alerts for Facebook and Twitter? No, I don't. I mean, there's so many people.
Yeah.
If you follow me on Facebook and you don't respond or like my photo of my 8-year-old, I'm okay with that. I really am. I hope that you're doing something with your own 8-year-old, or, you know.
Right, right, right. As opposed to just like feeling like you have to appease that person, because isn't it a people— isn't it a pleaser? Yes, we are pleasers. You know, people pleaser. Absolutely, absolutely.
And it's something. I mean, the technology is great, right? But you can't—
it doesn't let you off the hook, right?
It is constant. But turn off those alerts. I mean, there are times when you can search social media and catch up and comment then, but you don't have— but it's not a requirement. We make it, we require it of ourselves.
Yeah, absolutely. Right? Yep, absolutely. So, um, you work with a lot of people, um, and, um, they could be corporate professionals, they could be entrepreneurial professionals. Right. Um, can you give us a couple of examples, paint their picture of what they gained you before and then how you have been helping them to kind of minimize the superwoman?
Yes. So we had this woman in New York, and I was there with one of my concierge. My concierge walks up because she heard that this woman, this executive, needed some help. The woman immediately, she had the eye twitch. So her eye started twitching. She was speaking in choppy phrases. The concierge literally started walking backwards. She was afraid of this woman. What had happened was she had just been told by her employer that she has to go out of the country again. She had to leave in the next 24 hours. Um, so then at home, the nanny, housekeeper/nanny, was washing clothes because she's got to get all these clothes wash so the woman has clothes to take on this trip. The washer breaks. It's filled with her clothes and her now wet, dirty clothes are in the washer. Her nanny doesn't speak any English. Oh! And this woman is just twitching away and telling us this story, and I said, "That's fine," and she goes, "Wait, no, no, it's not fine!" I said, "No, no, it's fine because we're going to handle it." She goes, "What are What are you going to do? And what's really interesting is when they are so stressed out, they can tell you the problem, they can articulate the problem, they don't even have a clue what the answer is. Yeah. And I go—
that's because there's so much in their head.
Right. And so she's coming up with, what do you mean? So she needs to know. So what she's really asking is, what do you mean it's fine? What are you going to do? And I said, okay, so we're going to send— I'm going to send someone over to your house to deal with the washer, someone who speaks English, to deal with the washer because we have to go and look at the make and the model and find out if it's still under warranty and then call the repair guy and tell him what it's doing, etc. She can't articulate that in English. So, and then we're going to have your housekeeper, a Spanish-speaking member of my team, contact your housekeeper and tell her to throw all the dirty wet clothes into a basket and she's gonna drive them to the laundromat and she's gonna get those washed. While we handle the washer situation. By the way, where you're going out of the country, do you need converters for— do you need— you know, she's like, "What?" And I said, "Well, I don't know, your hair dryer, do you need—" "Uh-huh, yeah, I used to have a bag." "Right, what about your—" "Sure." "What about your very special, can only get, only know one place to get it here in the U.S., face cream, etc. Oh, your survival kit, your woman's survival kit, right? We gotta make sure all that's packed up." She's leaving the country —less than 24 hours. Right. All of a sudden, the eyes stopped twitching. And I was like, okay, and then I just need you to do one thing for me. And she's like, what? I said, breathe. Like, the whole conversation I kept thinking, is she gonna pass out? Okay, the eyes twitching is bad enough, but I think she's actually gonna lose consciousness, right? So you need to breathe. Just breathe. And she's like— and she's still not verbal at this point. Right, right. She's nodding. Yeah. And then she just kind of eases back and we take care of it from that point. But how rewarding is that? Yeah.
And it's not just like corporate executives who are flying around the world that have these stresses and strains. And it's the stay-at-home mom that has a bunch of kids. And even that schedule in itself, I always, I have a number of sisters who are superwomen. Superwoman moms and family keepers and CEOs of their household. And, you know, so we're talking to all of you ladies, and you have an option, an opportunity to kind of— we're going to talk about outsourcing, and we're going to talk about some other options for you. But in this, you know, very similar to this situation, you have to get out of your head in order to be clear and be able to to figure out what those options are. Right. Although picking up the phone and calling Times Square Concierge is an option. It absolutely is an option. Okay, we're going to take a quick break. When we come back, we've been using and throwing around this term superwoman, but I like to visualize things. I'm a very visual person and I want to help you do that too. So when we get back with Andrea Arena, TimesSquareConcierge.com, we'll get back into defining what does a superwoman look like and what does it mean to be a superwoman. We'll be right back. Welcome back everyone. We are talking with Andrea Arena, all around kind of helping you to prevent falling victim to the superwoman syndrome. And I was mentioning, um, earlier when we introduced the subject. My sister did. My oldest sister, Mary, she had bought me a book. I was in my 20s, and she bought me the Superwoman Syndrome book that was introduced, you know, like in the '70s, I think. And this was probably the late '80s. And so I totally, totally get it. And I found myself wandering up a parking garage, the Atlanta Airport parking garage, after multiple international trips back to back, hyperventilating because I couldn't find my car. And meanwhile, it was like 10 steps behind me, but I couldn't see it because I was so in my head and so overwhelmed. So paint us a picture, if you would, of what a superwoman is and isn't, but is.
And I think I'm glad you said you were so in your head because I think that's a big part of it. Right? I literally, I always park on the top floor of the parking deck for that very reason, because I am so completely consumed with my to-do list, with my action items, with my meetings, with dialogue about the next presentation, what have you, that I don't really know sometimes how I get to the airport. Okay. You know, and then, but yeah, here I am at the airport, right? Absolutely. So So I'm sitting there, and so every time I park on the top floor. I came out one day and it was— and also because you don't know if your flight's going to be delayed and if you're going to come out and it's going to be pitch dark, right? So I always park under a street light. So I come out and this time it wasn't, you know, in the middle of the night, but it was crazy early in the morning, 3 or 4 o'clock in the morning. So, and I'm— practically empty parking lot And there's my car, easy to find under the streetlight. I'm so exhausted and still thinking about, okay, this business trip is over, you know, I flew the red-eye home and now what action items? Because I'm literally going to go straight to work. I get in my car and instead of putting it in reverse, I put it in drive and I run into the only object up there, the streetlight. Hahaha. I'm sorry. I mean, honestly. The image though. And being the typical, you know, the superwoman syndrome, I don't even get out of my car to look at the damage because I'm still thinking about, oh, that was an inconvenience, but I have, you know, these things to do.
I need to get on.
I gotta get these things done, and da da da da, and I need to write a draft for this next presentation or meeting because I'm actually going straight to work at 4 o'clock in the morning. Oh yeah, get those records. That's crazy. I could have been injured, right? Right. And the fact that I don't even acknowledge that, that's a little incensed, right? So, and I don't, unfortunately, I don't think that's uncommon. You know, and then the scenario of a super, what does a superwoman look like who's a stay-at-home mom? Well, you know, the perfect lunches, you know, how does lunch have to be perfect? The kids' clothing has to be perfect, the homework has to be perfect. You have to be the one to bring all the snacks. You have to be the one who is, you know, involved in every single aspect, volunteering for everything from field day to PTA to, you know, it's— in the perfect— I think there's actually a competition among superwomen about the perfect birthday party. You're setting the bar too high, first of all.
There's a nice green layers of cupcakes.
Inátil for it. I literally ask a mom to lower the bar on hair. Because there was a child who comes to school with her hair perfectly done in a unique style every single day. I was like, you know, you got to lower the bar for the rest of us. It's unacceptable. I don't know what time you guys get up at your house to do all of this.
Unacceptable. Let alone if they're balancing also— because have your clients ever felt a different dynamic between they have a corporate job, all the power to them, And then there's the entrepreneur who— and that's an added pressure because it's almost like they consciously chose to be on their own. And so when they're not making money or when things aren't going right, they just feel like they have to amp it up even harder and more strict on themselves than if they had a corporate job where they're getting a steady paycheck and they know that they you know, we'll have it in 2 weeks, you know, unless they got fired or laid off, which would be, you know, straining and stressful. Um, what do you find when they are balancing kind of all of that? So how do you— like, for instance, what would you recommend and start advising your clients to do to start that outsourcing, as you call it?
And so it It's still your responsibility as a parent to put food on the table, right? To have a meal for your, to feed your family, still your responsibility. But how the groceries got there, not core. It's not your core responsibility. Picking out the produce is not your core responsibility. Sharing a meal with your child, much more important, right? So it's the little things. I mean, our clients outsource things like grocery shopping, picking up dry cleaning. Your dry cleaning is not cleaner because you picked it up versus me picking it up. It's just not. It's the same dry cleaning, right? Car maintenance. No one actually likes that, just FYI. No one enjoys just sitting the quality time in the waiting room, the luxurious waiting room at Chick-fil-A. That is not fun for anyone. And shouldn't that, can't that be done while you are busy at work? When you do it when you don't need your your car. Do it when you're on vacation. You don't need it. If they even have to keep it extra, that's fine, right? So it's that type of stuff. Yes, having a car in good working order, imperative. You spending quality time at Chippy Lou's and watching what, Maury Povich? I just— you can't. Yeah, it's not. So what if they can't—
what if they can't necessarily hire concierge to take some of those things off their plate? What other, like, are there other options? Are there other things they could be doing? Do they just figure out ways to kind of hire that out or delegate that out or task that out? Should they not be able to hire a concierge?
Unfortunately today, there's, and depending on the city you live in, there are tons of services available. I injured my back. And I am a single working mother, and so going to the grocery store and physically carrying groceries— now I realize I should call a concierge, but my concierge works for my clients, not for me. I would never call them for myself. It's so silly because it's like the cobbler's children have no shoes, right? So I use Instacart, and it was pretty convenient, you know, when you think about it. So there are a lot of— So what's Instacart? Instacart is, so you go online and you can order from They deliver from Costco. They deliver from the grocery, Publix or Kroger, whatever the grocery store as well. And you go online and say what you want and they go and get it. And then you pick a window, delivery window. So within 2 hours of me putting it on, putting the request online, my groceries are delivered to my door. He carried them in and I put them away.
Right. Right.
But he carried all the bags in and you're, I mean, there is a surcharge. I think it's maybe 10%. Right, right, right.
But I mean, heck, if your bill is $200, let's say, and it's 10%, $20 for somebody else to do your IV, all over that.
And what is your time worth? And I think that's where as women we don't do that. It's not that we can't do the math, it's that we don't do the math. We devalue our time all the time. If you simply, if you can't get a good grasp on how much an hour of your day is worth, what is your employer paying you?
So I was going to say, how do they do that? Because I do this for myself and folks that I work with, but how do you, do you do a calculation with them to kind of help them understand what they're—
Yes, if you look at your fully loaded comp and then take and then break that down into an hourly rate, What is your hourly rate at work? I guarantee you, you're worth a lot more than that, but at a minimum, that is your hourly rate, and you shouldn't be doing anything that is not core and worth, that you could pay someone less than that hourly rate.
Right, 'cause you're gonna be earning that hourly rate. You need to be compensated. Let's say it's $50 an hour. You'd be earning that versus, giving up that $50 because you're going to go off and spend $20 getting your groceries. Why not just spend that $20 getting your groceries so you can make $50 and therefore you have a profit of $30?
Exactly. Or spending time with your children. I mean, I love hearing the stories of what people, when we free up your time. Now, first of all, honestly, we have to tell our clients, we have to suggest how to spend the time. They've never had free time, like quote free time. They don't know what to do with it. They're like, "Well, what would I do Saturday?" Our intent as a company is to give you back your Saturday in hopes that you take this finite amount of personal time, right, and spend it doing higher value tasks, in whatever you deem a higher value, right? Right.
Even if that's just sitting there and staring at, you know—
Watching the grass grow. I don't care. Yes. Do what is of value to you. Right. I mean, the stories of, I went to my kid's game for the very first time because you guys handled all my running around in the middle of the workday. One, we did it at half the amount of time than if she did it dragging her kid kicking and screaming, you know, in the evening with all the other, you know, everybody else grocery shopping, right? Yeah. But we went to Costco and to the grocery store and all that in the middle of her workday. Half the amount of time, everything's done, and after work she went to her kid's game. And so she, the call gets escalated to me, which usually means that someone's not happy and, you know, I've gotta really do a number here, right? She said, "No, I wanted to talk to you directly to say thank you." She said, "For the very first time, I'm gonna be in the stands." And all I could say to her was, "Cheer loudly." That is the game out of his entire Little League career That is the game that he will remember, the one where he looked up in the stands and his mom was there.
How awesome is that? How freaking awesome is that? And it's so true because I remember when I left corporate and I had all this time on my hand and I went right to work. I started my business like the day after I left corporate, but then I just kind of started doing what you're recommending and trying to prioritize and delegate and outsource, as you call it. And the next thing you know, I'm sitting there on my couch on a Saturday, which was very rare for me. And I'm just like, I have nothing to do.
Awesome! Awesome! That is— yeah.
Okay, we're going to take a quick break. When we get back, I have a couple more questions for her before we finish up, but we'll be right back. Welcome back, everyone. We are in studio with Andrea Arena. Timesquaredconcierge.com. And you can also tweet with her @YourTimesSquared. And then Facebook, Times Square Concierge. Just do me a favor, Google her and you'll find all of her connections. Link in with her. And as I mentioned, if you have any questions, if you want to work with her, if you want to figure out, you know, more tips and advice from her, Also, you can email her directly at, hold on, andrea@timesquaredconcierge.com. Feel free to do that, or you can just go to our Facebook or Twitter, Shannon the Bitch page, put it there and I'll make sure that she gets it, okay? We have a few more minutes, so I want to just kind of have you break down beyond the errand running and whatnot, what are some other efficiency productivity tips you can provide.
Oh, so also, if you follow us on social media, we always promote a bunch of different life hacks. We love life hacks. We love ways to make your life more productive, easier, and they're fascinating and amazingly simple. Everyone just goes, "Are you kidding me?" One of my personal favorites around this time of day is, you know how people drink iced piss Bernadette thinks it's really hot here, so you know how people drink iced coffees? Well, but then they put ice in it and it dilutes it, so one of the life hacks is that you pour coffee, you make coffee ice cubes. Ah, yes. So then you're not diluting your coffee with your ice cubes. Yeah, right. So little things like that that just make your, you're like, ah, that is so simple, why didn't I think of that? So that's a lot of fun. Also, I think it's really interesting with regards to productivity, and we talked about saying no, we talked about setting limits. You've got to schedule in, so we all are slaves to our Outlook calendars, right? And we schedule everything, right? We probably, when to go pee, I don't know. We schedule everything, but do we schedule time for ourselves? Yes. Right? Yeah, sure. And what does that look like for you? And okay, so working out for me, means 5:30 in the morning at my house. That's not ideal, but that is what it is. And I set the clock and I do it, right? Because it is that important, scheduling time for myself. Right, absolutely. You know, I did not, in giving myself permission, I didn't give myself permission after I sold the first company, before I started the new company, I had a little bit of a hiatus. It took me 6 months to give myself permission I decided to read a book for leisure because I read business books. Right. I'm going to learn something out of these books. I decided instead of taking a little class on something I enjoy, whether it's Pilates or something, no, I was going to take a class on speed reading because then I could read the Business Voice quicker. That is mental. That's nuts. Right? That is nuts. What does time for yourself look like?. For me, it's a massage once every couple of weeks. That's a bit of a splurge. I found a really good guy at a really good price. You can tweet me about it. I'll give you some information if you're here locally because he's awesome. But you know, you have to.
I put park on there. I put when I want to go to the gym. I put my goal setting. On there, like 15 minutes every morning I set my goals for the day based on my other goals.
But there's also an interesting new app that I found that is all about how to find that time, okay, how to find that time, and one I want you to look at is called RescueTime, and it is an app on your phone, I mean on your computer that you download onto your computer, and it tracks how you spend your time on your computer, on your computer. You may not want to know how you spend your time, right? But it will tell you if you're spending, you know, how much time you're spending on Facebook and Twitter, and then you can decide, okay, I'm gonna, or maybe you set alarms to cut that off.
Ah, that's awesome. I love that.
It's amazing how much time you can find in your day.
And they don't have an app that you can do it, so your phone, because so many people are on their phone.
Yes, yes, same one.
You can do it on the phone too. Because people do— I do Facebook and Twitter and everything else on—
oh my gosh, it's awesome. Rescue time.
OK, rescue time. All right, so I'm going to give you another 30 seconds because I want more tips.
What else? More tips. OK. One thing is we have this constant internal struggle around quality versus quantity. And I want people to recognize— a tip for me personally is about the— We don't get to pick that we're going to spend more quantity of time with our children, with our families, but—
How we spend it.
For me, it's how we spend it. For me, it's really about being absolutely present in that time, in that very finite amount of time, and I think that is so critical, and that will pay back exponentially.
Right. And you can go back to our past episodes because we talk about being present, being self-aware, being now a lot because that is, even from what she was talking about, about being in your head and being overwhelmed as a result of being in your head all the time. It's kind of being aware that you're in your head and taking that breath consciously and purposely in order for you to ground yourself. And I do, I want you to kind of connect with her in all ways possible and take advantage of those those life hacks and those tips and advice and her services if you're able. And though she's had her current business for 2 years, if I know Andrea at all, she'll have a business like her previous one that she successfully sold that will expand outside of Georgia, maybe, if that's your goal.
Yeah, we're currently in 10 US cities. Nice!
There you go. There you go. There you go. So just take advantage of that, if you would. Andrea Arena of Times Square Concierge, thank you so much. Such a pleasure. Such a pleasure.
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