How Workplace Belonging Improves Leadership and Performance

On today's episode, we are diving straight in to a tension that so many ambitious leaders feel but rarely name. It's the exhausting choice between fitting in and burnout. Our guest, Andrea D. Carter, organizational scientist and CEO of Andrea Carter Consulting. She's the creator of the Belonging First methodology, the first validated framework for measuring workplace belonging, and her research has impacted over 150,000 employees across 8 industries. She's a TEDx speaker, a Forbes Council member, and was named a top 10 MSN Women Disruptor for 2025. And today she's breaking down what most workplaces still get wrong about belonging. If you're giving 100% and still feel invisible, Andrea explains the 100 to 0 dynamic where you're doing all the work to belong and how powerhouse leaders are actually shifting into a 50/50 model of accountability instead. We'll unpack the 5 indicators of belonging: comfort, connection, contribution, psychological safety, and wellbeing, and show you how to use them as your own personal diagnostic. You'll leave with 3 concrete power moves you can use this week, including scripts for asking for what you need, setting boundaries, and showing up authentically without apology. So you can lead with strength and be the powerhouse leader you're meant to be. Stay with us.

Welcome to Shedding the Corporate Bitch, the podcast that transforms today's managers into tomorrow's powerhouse leaders. Your host, Bernadette Boas, executive coach and author, brings you into a world where the corporate grind meets personal growth and success. Each and every episode. Let's do this.

Andrea, welcome, welcome, welcome. How are you?

I'm fantastic. Thanks so much for having me today, Bernadette. I'm excited to be here.

I'm excited that you are here and I'm excited to really understand what an organizational scientist is and everything that goes with it in regards to our topic, because I think this topic is extremely powerful and, and will provide a different and unique lens for our professionals at any level that they're at as far as really belonging and what they need to do to get career advancement. So as we kick off, can you help me understand exactly what an organizational scientist is, what they do, and how it's applicable to the work that you do?

Totally. So everyone thinks that that is a really big word. Like, what is an organizational scientist? But really it's a researcher and a practitioner. And what I do is I basically apply research methods to understand how, um, an organization is functioning, how the people are behaving within the organization, and then how to design both infrastructure and systems to both improve performance and human experience at work. So it's, it's kind of like psychology, sociology, management theory, economics, neuroscience, all wrapped up into one.

You're prescribing pretty much.

I wouldn't call it prescribing. That wouldn't be only because the researcher in me is like, well, no, it's, it's not prescriptionary, but it certainly is, you're able to find the source. So because you're taking data in, because you're measuring what belonging is, because you're measuring performance, and I think most people think of, okay, so if we're measuring for engagement, you know, we understand what's happening in the organization, but that's actually not entirely true because engagement kind of shows who is busy, whereas belonging actually shows who can actually succeed. And so with those two elements, we can actually see direct correlations between when we measure for belonging, when we measure for engagement, when we measure for performance, we can actually see how when you put infrastructure around that, you can actually regulate your engagement. You can regulate speed. You can actually see quality coming forward in conversations rather than repetitive solutions. So it's more innovative, it's more creative. You're actually putting the structure in place so that people can succeed and do their best within the environment. When belonging has infrastructure, so I always say, people always think that belonging is like, oh, it's a feeling. And I will push back on that and I will say, well, no, belonging is actually a science that you can feel, and you actually need 5 indicators in order for your brain to go, okay, I belong here and I'm actually creating belonging here. When you have that infrastructure, that is actually what impacts or correlates with your engagement, your performance, innovation, quality, speed, all of those things. Like there's a lot of people on LinkedIn right now talking about their belonging culture, and I would be very willing to say that, you know, 99% of them don't even know what belonging is. You can't say that. That's why we're here. That's why we're here.

Why we're here. So let's, beyond what you mentioned about what belonging is, let's dig into it.

Okay, let's do it. Yes.

Give us a really good where we can feel it. We can visualize it, we can then almost see how we need to apply it. Uh, what is belonging?

So without going too far into the indicators, I'm gonna give you the names for each of them. So belonging starts with comfort, connection, contribution, psychological safety, and wellbeing. And those 5 came out of the data. Okay. They're, they're not categories that I invented. Um, they're consistently what emerged as conditions that had to be present in order for belonging to be experienced. And belonging is the reason everybody relates to it. And I joke about the fact that everybody on LinkedIn thinks that they know what it is, is because there is a feeling that associates with it that your body actually picks up on. Before your brain catches up to it. But belonging is actually what calms us when we are in conflict or friction. It's what gets us out of our panic state so we can think clearly. It bonds us, so it creates trust in those friction situations. It activates and motivates us so that we can actually move through the friction. It protects us so that we're willing to keep going and keep showing up even when there's a bit of fear of social punishment. And then it actually renews us. So belonging requires— it's different than fitting in. And we've been socialized to believe that belonging is fitting in, and they're actually on either side of the spectrum here, right? So fitting in is 100% on me. For me to shapeshift into what you want from me, Bernadette, so that I can actually be accepted in the environment. Belonging, on the other hand, requires that both you and I participate. So it means that in an environment, in any given environment, you are not only receiving belonging, but you are giving belonging. And we can be very one-sided about this. And so what the research shows though, is that when you actually have that 50/50 engagement, that's actually where your brain can do its best. It's where you are going to perform at your top because you can go into a situation and you already have the clarity and the success factors and the predictability to go, okay, my brain doesn't have to think about all of these other issues that are in the environment. I can just focus on what I need to do. You have enough trust that is not transactional, but it's actually developed so that you have a hormone that's released and you're known and people want to know you. They wanna have your back. They wanna know what you're going to say. They wanna know what you think about things. You know, they, they keep, even when you make a mistake, they want you to keep going because they understand and they see something in you that they can tell that you're on the cusp of something or you're producing. And then they also care about sustaining your wellbeing. And not always being in these highly volatile situations. And so building in where there is rest and when there is— yes, there are going to be times where you are full out and it could be 6 weeks, but we need rest within those 6 weeks at key points where people are actually looking out, okay, what's on your plate? What do we need to shift? How do we reprioritize? All 5 of those things create belonging. And so when you have that, think about that environment. That's the environment that you go into and you can have an argument. You can ha— you can disagree upon whatever the information is, but you stay in that conversation. You repair when there is harm and you actually come together because of the friction that leads you to producing something incredible together. And the thing that most people don't understand about the human brain is that we are interdependent, which means that our brain is always looking for our social systems that we can rely on. And so when people start to try and do everything on their own, it actually takes them into a space of loneliness. It puts the brain into high alert or defensive. It makes us more angry. It makes us more aggressive. Um, and so there's all of these elements about if we are only ever showing up 100% to zero, we're actually never allowing the interdependence to show up for us. So that we can actually create really incredible things together.

I'd like to get practical about this. And what I mean by that is someone listening or watching this and they're trying to wrap their head around it. And maybe they work with a lot of people that aren't necessarily in touch with their emotions or their feelings, or they've grown up like I did in that robotic, just, just come to work, leave your emotions out the door. Uh, we're not going to be friends. We don't need to connect. We don't need to engage. I just need you to get the job done. And yet, to your point, inside there's so much turmoil and stress about them wanting to truly belong, not just fit in, as you said. So. Can you give it like a belonging for dummies when it comes to just kind of practically how can managers and leaders look at it so they can see how they can apply it?

Totally. Diagnostic question. Let's go there. Do you have clear expectations for your role? Is it transparent as to what the criteria is? For your deliverables? Do you have a predictable enough environment that you can actually perform at your best? That is comfort. So if you're a leader, are you creating clear expectations for your direct reports? Do you have the language to actually do that? Is it really transparent of what the success criteria is for deliverables? When you go into a meeting, For example, are you actually saying this meeting is about this specific action item? This is what we need to decide by the end of this meeting, and this is who the final decision is being made by. That is comfort. Okay? That, that is very clearly laid out so that the brain goes, okay, I have all these things. Check, check. Yay. I can go to work because the thing that we know, especially right now in today's volatile environment, in these economic times, political times, what we're seeing is that everything is always changing. Nothing is stable. And so what the brain actually needs at this point in time is to know what it can rely on and what won't be changing. The more that you can actually give the brain things that this is exactly what it is. And it seems so basic, but it's amazing to see what happens in people's brains when they actually have this. Everything down to just that one specific thing of this is what the meeting is about. This is what we need to achieve. This is what we need to do, and this is who's making the final decision. Even that allows people to show up at their best and it puts their prefrontal cortex into action. So Connection. That's the next one. That's the one that you were talking about. And so this is connection is what bonds you together. It's what produces oxytocin. And so it used to be that like oxytocin was thought that it was only between like a mother and its newborn baby. But neurologically, oxytocin is actually the hormone that's released and it says, hey, I'm safe here. And I can extend trust here. Now there's a theory called the polyvagal theory. And it basically tells us that we have to rely on social cues. And if those social cues are absent, inconsistent, or threatening, that means that our social engagement brain disengages and our older defense circuitry kicks in. So that means that if you're not getting that 50/50, you're really easily going to go into defense circuitry consistently, and you're going to be looking for people and their actions that are both unsafe and places where you can't trust. So the way I like to think about connection is that connection is a bioenergetic resource that the brain treats as like oxygen or glucose. And when participants actually see trusted friends beside them, they literally perceive hills as less steep. Okay, that's how powerful this is. And so if you are working with a team who are not connecting with you and they are seen as threats, you are going to perceive that report, that whatever product you're working on, that is going to be 10x'd to what you feel is possible rather than standing with people who you're bringing metabolically aligns with so that you work less hard to accomplish the same task. Like, just think about that. Yeah. So the way I look at it, you know, isolation is actually really expensive for humans. Belonging is cognitively efficient because we actually can go all in and we're actually better together.

Connection. So we have comfort, we have connection. So share with us some major tidbits on contribution.

Yeah. Okay. So contribution is, it's backed by dopamine. Okay. Dopamine and serotonin. And it is the, you know, when you're, you're, you have a checklist. So many of us have checklists. Lots of us are gamified, right? Where we check something off and goes, and you're like, ooh, that's so, it's so gratifying. It feels so good. That's dopamine. Okay. That's dopamine saying, yeah, you did it. It is a reward signal. And the brain doesn't just need dopamine to do meaningful work. It actually needs evidence. And if we're not getting feedback loops where you know that the work that you are creating is actually creating an impact, the dopamine actually rises and then it falls flat. And so then what happens is that over time, your motivation doesn't actually continue. You actually need serotonin to keep going. And the only way you get serotonin after that dopamine raises and you want the serotonin to come up is you actually have to have somebody recognize your work, or you have to be able to see where it's actually made a difference.

The impact.

The impact.

The possibility.

The contribution. Yes. And so most leaders think, you know, if I'm giving somebody praise, that's good enough. But the neuroscience actually says that people need the visibility of what they did mattering. Okay? Those are not the same thing.

Right.

And so the pattern that we're seeing, and this is something that I would say is like a really quick fix, but think of all of the people that contribute to a report. How many names are actually on that report? Usually it's like the leader's name or maybe it's like their direct contributor. Maybe it's a team of 3. You rarely see all of the people that made an impact. And you rarely hear leaders say, we got to this point because Bernadette thought of this and Richard contributed that. And that piece of just being able to name and say key specific elements.

Yeah.

Those pieces matter more than just that, hey, Bernadette, great job.

No, it's true. I was at a client yesterday. I'm going to throw this out real quick. Client yesterday, uh, he was presenting to his team, setting up goals and expectations for the year. And he started off with wins and he started off with highlighting specific individuals and the contribution and the value that they brought to the team. And yet they all of a sudden would just like, you'd see a smile, you'd see them sit up, you'd see them like just look around to see if other people are, are kind of giving them a good job. It was beautiful, I'll call it. Um, yeah, cause it definitely showed that not only the recognition to your point, but also he discussed the impact and the contribution that they made.

Absolutely. So we know that it's, we know that when we build this infrastructure, we know that we can change the results. And because we're able to measure it, we also can not only validate what's happening within the experience, the feeling, but we're actually seeing it on paper too.

I'll often hear that even if it is hard feedback, they appreciate and they really feel valued in in the fact that individuals was willing to give them that feedback because they would want to improve, they want to change, they want to grow.

That willingness to show up, that's contribution as well.

Okay.

Because you're willing to meet the other person. That's where connection and contribution have a bit of overlap because you're coming together. And even if the conversation is hard or the it's a difficult challenge. The friction that you're experiencing is there so that both of you can do better so that the overall environment can do better. We don't thrive when we don't get out of our, I know comfort zone sounds a little bit funny, but people always come up against this with me anyways, 'cause it's like, well, if we're always trying to just be nice to people, like how do we ever grow? And that's not what comfort is about. Comfort That indicator is about taking the brain into its optimal state, whereas connection and contribution are building that trust, building that bond so that when things get hard, we can actually both contribute. And even if we're not on the same page, we can work through the friction to actually get to the other side.

Okay. All right. Psychological safety. Big. Yeah. Who's loving point?

When it comes to psychological safety, you know, we're looking at the brain being able to take intelligent risk. That is how I will articulate it because social threat triggers the same circuitry in the brain as physical threat, OK? So rejection, exclusion, humiliation, shame. Those actually light up the same areas that process the regions of physical pain. When psychological safety is low, the threat of social punishment overrides the capacity for contribution. So people will only give minimal impact. They're going to protect themselves. You get compliance, you don't get performance. And so when you think about psychological safety, There's actually really wonderful studies that actually show that people who have gone through high periods of workplace trauma, workplace toxicity— workplace toxicity is at its highest, 80% right now, up 14% from 2024. So that data was at the end of 2025. So we know that this is a problem and we know that people's brains are actually being taken off line because it's showing up as pain. And there's studies on this that actually have people taking acetaminophen, which of course reduces pain experience. And on functional MRIs, we can see that their brains are actually not as reactive. So we know that not having psychological safety in the environment, that's why it's so important. And that's why Amy Edmondson has just done incredible things. And yet we actually need to bring in that 50/50 concept so that your cortisol isn't spiking all the time. Because when we don't have psychological safety, your adrenal glands and your pituitary gland, they don't know when to shut off. And so they're constantly producing cortisol. Stress, stress, stress, stress, stress, stress, stress. And so that is going to activate your social threat mechanism 10 times, 20 times, depending on what you're then paying attention to.

So how does that feed into wellbeing?

Look at our burnout rates right now. Okay. So social threat activates the same circuitry, meaning that our cortisol is constantly going. Wellbeing is really about sustainable performance. And right now there's this trend of like delivering resilience training. And that always makes me laugh because it's like, okay, Bernadette, if you can go away with this app and these meditations, this exercise routine and this nutritional plan, and you bounce back, you're a good person. You're a good worker. But if you can't, too bad. The reason I'm downplaying this, and I'm obviously making light of it, is that wellbeing and resilience doesn't happen in isolation. It's not a solo sport. We actually know based on all of the, um, research done from natural disasters. So think back like Hurricane Katrina, any of the disasters that are happening right now, um, we see them across the world. When there isn't a social infrastructure, it actually takes the brain and the body significantly longer to recover. So the data shows that when there is a social structure in place where I'm showing up for you and your wellbeing, and you're showing up for me and my wellbeing, we will recover 40 to 60 times faster than people that don't have a social network.

Wow. Wow. Yeah.

So the cumulative cost, physiological cost of sustained stress without recovery really degrades all of the other indicators over time. And so that's why when we look at what is sustainable, building sustainability into our practice, into the structure of our working days is actually really critical so that we can also be mindful of what's going on. I think that being able to look at someone before they get to a place where they're crashing and recognize, okay, Bernadette, what can I take off your plate? Even if it's just for today, what can I help you with today? How can we shift a priority today? What do we need to do for this week? You're not always going to be able to change the urgency and the critical demand. Of what your workplace is asking of you, but you can certainly change how you show up for each other. And when you have that support, it completely changes what happens and how resilient you are. It's how quickly you bounce back.

And it's not necessarily support to where—

there's no athlete on this planet who can perform— think of the Olympics. They're not performing at peak performance every single minute of their day. They have recovery built in for a reason. The more that we can build recovery in, into our day, even if it's 10, 15 minutes, we're actually giving our brain what it needs in order to perform at its best. And belonging does that as well.

I love that. I love that whole thing about recovery. That is very, well, it's, it's powerful. And I love the analogy of an athlete. Because I, I'm thinking to myself, you know, tennis players, and I watch a lot of tennis and they always talk about, you know, their, the 2-hour recovery that they have to do even when they're finishing matches at 1 o'clock in the morning, they still have to stick around and do their 2-hour recovery. So you speak about 3 power moves that someone can then focus on to reclaim this belonging that we're talking about, which then I've seen that you tie that also to executive presence, like how people are showing up.

Absolutely. So one of the things that we had to do when we were looking at belonging was we had to look at what our shared language is. And Bernadette, you alluded to this early on in our conversation where you were talking about, you know, what happens if you were raised like me and it was a stiff upper lip and it was just like, go figure it out. You know, I think that, that, that's important for us to think of here because a lot of the reason that we don't know how to create really strong teams or really strong leadership is because we don't have the language when belonging breaks down. I'm gonna give you 3 power moves, and then I'm also gonna give you something that you can use so that you can see where that belonging is breaking down. Perfect. So the first thing that I will say And you need to have a conversation using shared language.

Okay?

If you're not using the same language, it really makes it hard for people to understand because all of us have different elements of how we show up and how we perceive things. And so, absolutely. And so pick one relationship that feels fragile and there's a tool I'm gonna give you. I want you to just go identify where that belonging is weak, whether that's comfort, connection, contribution, psychological safety, or wellbeing. And what I want you to then do is take whichever one is weak for you. And you may already, you don't even necessarily need the health check to do it. You can often think in your mind, like, where is it breaking down? What you wanna do though is you wanna think about it and go, okay, I realize I haven't been clear. In what I actually need in this specific indicator. And here's what would help me. Having that conversation about belonging in those 5 indicators doesn't mean that you're, you know, bringing up all of these elaborate things. You're literally starting from one specific place. So imagine that you see that there's constant tension between you and another person, and it always happens in a meeting. Likely, there's no clarity or predictability on what you're actually trying to achieve together when you're in that meeting. So get clear and, you know, even just like what I shared with you earlier, just acknowledge what it is that you need to do together so that when you're together, you're actually getting that done. Giving people language to understand what you're asking for actually acknowledges your own responsibility to them. You're inviting them to opt in rather than assuming that they're not going to or that they don't care enough. That is something that we often go into and we have to look at how we're showing up so that we show up and use language that allows them to show up. The second thing I would say is bring your voice and ask for what you need. So that you're actually, again, using that language. So here's what I mean. Identify like one spot that you are shrinking, over-softening, not actually saying what you mean. Look at it this week. Okay. And don't just do it and hope for the best, but really think about where am I not showing up here? And then have that conversation where you say, listen, I just realized I've actually been softening my language, or I've been holding back, and that's actually not helping either of us here. I wanna speak more directly and, and challenge some of the decisions around what we're missing. And here's what I need from you to make that work. And what I'd love for you to do is after I tell you what I need, I want you to tell me what you need. And then we can actually challenge each other in ways that will make an impact, that will make a difference.

Love it. Do you see how that language really, it changes how we're showing up and it changes how it's received and it's allowing people to lean in as opposed to, you know, lean back or get defensive right off the start. Yes, absolutely.

Totally. Last power move, have a capacity conversation with someone. So this week, what I would love for you to do is initiate a conversation about sustainable pace and workload. This doesn't mean that you're necessarily, you know, putting the brakes on everything and, you know, everybody is getting time off and massive bonuses. That's not what we're looking for here. Okay. What we're looking for is, I wanna talk to you about how we're managing workload and pace together. Here's what I'm committed to. I'm gonna communicate my capacity honestly before I hit the wall or before I push through something. I really want to respect the boundaries that we have as a team, and here's what I need for you. Check my current workload before adding on new requests. Or help me prioritize what matters most when we're all at capacity. If you're modeling some of that language, and if you're, if you're the leader, you would flip it. So it would be, I wanna talk to you about how we're managing workload or pace together. Here's what I'm committing to. I'm gonna check your capacity before I'm adding work to you. I'm also going to help prioritize so that you're not always feeling like you are on 100%. I want you to also have your recovery time so that you actually have the time to recover so you can keep going at the pace that we're at. Can you hear that language? How when we communicate honestly and when we talk about, hey, you know what, we're in a situation where this isn't getting easier in the immediate future, but we can certainly work together about capacity and about workload. So that we all have recovery time so that when we come back to the time together, we are in work mode, we are in productivity mode, we are in engagement mode. If you're not actually taking care of how the brain is reacting to threat, you're actually paying for maybe a 50% employee. And it's because that person's brain is never gonna be online to the extent that you need them online. And so their salary is costing you way more. So as a leader, I actually would push back at this. And we actually have data where we looked at, you know, two different manufacturing plants, Plant A and Plant B. Plant B didn't have belonging, Plant A did. And when you look at their productivity, when you look at how they solved safety issues, all of their work was 75% higher than Plan B. And so you can see that you don't have, you don't not have time to actually make people a priority. And as AI demands more and more of the attention and the direction, your employees are actually going to demand more of the human skill and the brain work that we need in order for us to regulate. Because every single leader walks into a room and they either regulate it or they dysregulate it. And I can tell you that a dysregulated leader is the start of mold. And that mold, it spreads fast these days.

Right.

And that workplace toxicity data is at an all-time high.

Well, the fact that it went up 14%, even just since 2024, and it's at 80.

80%.

Hear that, people? 80%. That's just something that should just blow away anyone who considers themselves a leader and to find this infrastructure of belonging that can help to transform it.

And it's actually not that hard. Like once you know the indicators and once you know some of the key elements of it, it's actually really quick and you can, you can see it in real time. Which I always think is so great.

You have a diagnostic assessment. Yes.

So you can go to belongingfirst.com/belongingbreakdown. It's 5 minutes. It's a health check on belonging. It's 10 questions, 5 for you, 5 for the other person that you're thinking about that you think belonging is fragile with. And you'll actually figure out where belonging is fragile. It will give you insights, if you will. Into understanding where you're either not delivering belonging or where belonging isn't showing up and how to actually have the language to have some of those conversations.

I will make sure all that information is in the show notes. So be sure everyone to get access. It's called the Belonging Health Check. And again, you can go to belongingfirst.com/belongingbreakdown. Also check out the work Andrea is doing. It's fabulous. And on her website, belongingfirst.com, and also LinkedIn with her. And of course, that's @AndreaDCarter. Andrea, thank you so much. This has been absolutely fabulous.

Thank you so much, Bernadette, for having me. I know you've been a fantastic host and I've just been so thrilled to be here. Thank you. You're very, very welcome.

Power! What a fabulous conversation with Andrea that went way beyond fitting in. I thought it was just an unbelievably powerful conversation. I hope you did as well. And if you did, please feel free to share it with your team members, your peers, and colleagues. So all of you can help to transform your teams and organization, and even yourself as a powerhouse leader. You can also follow the show. Go to bolafirecoaching.com/podcast and follow us on any one of your streaming services and on our Shed the Corporate Bitch TV YouTube channel. I'll look forward to having you right back here for another episode of Shedding the Corporate Bitch. Bye.

Thank you for tuning into today's episode of Shedding the Corporate Bitch. Every journey taken together is another step towards unleashing the powerhouse leader within you. Don't miss any of our weekly episodes. Subscribe to our podcast on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you love to listen. And for those who thrive on visual content, catch us on our Shedding the Bitch YouTube channel. Wanna dive deeper with Bernadette on becoming a powerhouse leader? Visit balloffirecoaching.com to learn more about how she helps professionals, HR executives, and team leaders elevate overall team performance. You've been listening to Shedding the Corporate Bitch with Bernadette Boas. Until next time, keep shedding, keep growing, and keep leading.