Inspiring Leadership with an And/Or Attitude with Delynn Miller

Are you ready to break free from the norm and learn how to truly stand out by identifying and shifting your mindset so you become and believe that you are a powerhouse leader? Our guest, Delaine Miller, herself refuses to settle for the same old, same old, and therefore works with her clients to help them find true purpose in their work and life that translates to to great success for their teams, their companies, and for themselves. Delene is going to share with us how to approach life with an end versus or attitude and stop blending in and find your voice and confidence. She's going to talk about reprogramming yourself to be the leader you want to be and to be the leader who inspires versus pushes your team. So stay with us. Welcome, welcome, welcome to Shedding the Corporate Bitch, the podcast that transforms female corporate executives into powerhouse leaders by showing them how to shed the challenges and overwhelm along with any fear, insecurity, self-doubt, and negativity holding them back. I'm your host, Bernadette Boas of Ball of Fire Coaching, bringing you powerhouse discussions each week to share tips, advice, and sometimes tough love so you create the riches in your work and life you deserve. Let's do this. Delynn, how are you? Welcome to the show.

Thank you. Happy to be here. Thanks for having me.

I am thrilled to have you, and especially if we're going to talk at like end or attitude. Love it. Want to understand more about it, but before we do, but before we do I always like to ask one question, really it's just tell us about yourself to where outside of the workplace, who is Dellyn and how can our listeners and viewers really connect and relate with you? So tell us a little bit about yourself.

Absolutely. So I am a life and success and leadership coach, and up in, in the last decade, this is what I've been doing. Before this, I was an executive in corporate healthcare and I shed all of that and stepped into a whole different person of, and into a whole different life and a whole different role, which I'm sure we'll talk about. And yeah, it's been just an amazing journey. So now we, I went from even working in like solopreneur and I really missed working with other people. I missed not just— I really nailed leading my own life. And I wanted to hop back into leading teams and helping other people to lead as well. So this is where Pursuit Institute came up. So we created a personal development institute that specializes in taking people from point A to point Z. And I now work with a ton of really amazing coaches that I've partnered with. And it's just, it's a really cool atmosphere that serves both client and coach to the next level. So that's been really cool as well. Yeah.

Yeah, that is very, very cool. And I love this whole thing about having an end-or attitude. However, if our listeners and viewers like me, I was like, Hmm, what exactly does that mean? So tell us what your take on and/or attitude is.

When, when we have— we live in a society that's very much like, and maybe you were raised like I was raised, like, can't you just be happy with what you have, right? You can have this or you can have this, and it was never and, right? So an and attitude really involves embracing the idea that we as humans, as women, can pursue it all, that we can actually have it all, like simultaneously, not this or this. It's actually this and this, right? Without feeling compelled that we have to have these boundaries or competing priorities that I think a lot of people are really feeling. So when I take this approach, I really try to recognize that, you know, we can be successful leaders while also maintaining really fulfilling personal lives, right? So if we have the or attitude, that kind of is giving us this idea that you have to make choices of this or this. And I like to really encourage the "and" attitude over "or." And where do you think that's stemming from?

Where did the, you know, the "or" really come from?

Yeah, I mean, generationally, we've grown up in, you can't have it all. You can't have everything that you want. You can either have, you can have the job or you can have the family, you can have happiness or you can have the money. You can have, right? Like, this is very much a programming. I know I'm not the only person that was programmed because I coach people that are like, oh my God, my parents used to say that to me too. And that's the thing. It's not a let's hate on our parents thing because our parents, everybody is doing the best they can with their current level of awareness, right? So it's like they didn't mean to pass on this or thinking. But they inadvertently just did, right?

So now, but doesn't teachers and social media— I mean, it's like not just the parents, but even the people that we work with, especially as women. Yeah, even the people that we work with kind of make it seem as if, well, wait a minute, you're a woman, you want to work, and you want to have a family? That's not going to happen, right?

Right, absolutely. Well, and even I remember when I resigned at my corporate healthcare job. Really, it just happened to be just after I had my first daughter. It wasn't because I had my first daughter. It was just kind of like the perfect storm of like, okay, I'm meant for more. I can't do it in this box that I'm being put in over here, and I'm meant to do something different. And I just happen to be a mom now.

Right?

So it's so, so many people when I resigned, because I had like, I was like a, I spent 15 years being like a professional ladder climber in this organization. And like right from graduating university, and I was like, doop doop doop, climbing all the ladders. And when I resigned, everybody was like, oh yeah, now you, and they used to say to me, now you get to spend more time with your babies, or, oh, now you get to do this. And I'm like, No, no. I was already doing that. And it's actually because I started my own business. And yep, my kids are still going to be being watched by somebody else part-time because I got stuff to do. Right? Or, "Oh, now you can do this. Now you can." And I'm just like, "No, no, no, no. I was doing it before. I'm out of here because it's not filling me up anymore." It's not in alignment with how I see my life. Like, that's why I'm leaving. But every woman, I mean, in healthcare, it's very female-dominated profession. It was very much, oh, now you can do this. And it's like, it really showed me that you're doing this and you feel like you can't. You live in an or world. Like, okay, I chose, they're saying like, I'm choosing the career and you're choosing family. And I'm like, no, no, no, I'm choosing me. Yes, I'm choosing me and I'm showing my now daughters that they get to choose them as well. And by me choosing me, I'm actually choosing them.

Yes.

Right.

Awesome. I love that. I love that.

By, by me choosing me, I'm choosing my professional life. I'm choosing my personal life. I'm choosing it all. But it's, it's, it has to start with me first. Yeah. Right. So the or mentality started with me, but the and more mentality starts with me as well.

Yes. And you know, you can back up and wouldn't you say too, the or mentality, uh, started with everyone externally from you.

Yeah.

Um, and therefore we'll talk to the audience and then we each embed what we want to, and/or we decide that we want something more and we change it to an end.

That's right.

All right. And that has to be done individually.

Absolutely.

And someone has to decide on that. Is that right?

Absolutely. Well, I mean, everything starts with a decision, right? You— everybody gets to decide what does my and look like, right? So because we've already been programmed with what does our or look like, like for some, for some people, they weren't programmed with the money or happiness or job or parenting. Or professional or marriage. Like they weren't programmed with those things, right? So it depends on what your experience has been. But first, once you decide where you're going, it's the rest kind of starts to take care of itself, right? At the end of the day, right? So when I, when I decided and I had that epiphany, I mean, it just happened to come when I was pregnant. I was like, wait a sec. Like I, I like this job, but I'm actually really good at it. But wait a sec, I'll probably be pretty kick-ass at whatever I do. So let's scratch that, but you're really good at it, right? Okay, I like it, but I don't love it. And okay, so what is it that I— how do I see my life, right? Because in becoming pregnant for me was kind of just the catalyst to get me thinking in a different way, right? And for somebody else, Maybe it's not getting pregnant. Maybe it's moving into a different job. Maybe it's moving to a different part of the world. Maybe it's getting married or maybe it's getting a dog. I don't know, whatever. It could be different things for different people, right? But there's usually that catalyst that you're literally sent. Like you were sent from the universe to go like, "All right, like pitter-patter, let's start thinking about how we're going to do this." at the end of the day, as humans, we're a spirit having a human experience, right? And all our spirit wants is growth and expansion. Like, that's why else would we be in this human experience, right? So like, we're not, we're not in this experience to have an or life. Like, our spirit's going, okay, you're going to grow through this and this and this and this and expose yourself to this. But what happens is, because we're human, we be peoplein', right? Right? We're— fear kicks in. Like, our spirit's not scared of anything, but as humans, and even when we're babies, we're not scared of anything. We're programmed to be scared of things. We're programmed to be scared of money, to be scared of success, to be scared of like working outside of a job that like guarantees a paycheck, right? We're scared. We're programmed to be scared.

Yes. All right, so before we go there, because I— that's a whole subject I want to definitely get into and talk about. However, you also made the comment about— and I hope I scribbled it fast enough— but you made a comment about like we're sent messages, you know, to kind of, you know, shift us.

Yeah.

How does one recognize those? How does one really get conscious of those type of universal messages to where we just don't overlook them and pass, run past them, and therefore don't get that opportunity.

Yeah, the— it's a feeling. So it might, it might physically come in like a message, um, because there's messengers all over the place, right? When you have the initial feeling and it's like the, the— it's like a blip of a thought in your mind, right? You, you have this kind of initial thought Then you go, okay, is that thought for me? But then what happens is your habit, your habitual way of thinking kind of starts hijacking everything. And it's like, oh no, that's not for you. Who do you think you are? Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Remember, remember your roots, all the blah, blah, blahs, right? So that kind of starts to take over, but that feeling will never go away. And I know for me and a lot of my clients that I've worked with, they're like, I literally had this feeling. 10 years ago, but I ignored it because I got scared. They don't say they got scared. Once they raise their awareness and they go, oh yeah, that was me being scared, me being human, right? Just out there doing my thing. So then it's just like that feeling will keep coming back and you'll keep getting messages. Maybe it's the next book you read. Maybe it's the next song you hear. Maybe it's the next commercial you see or the person you talk to. You will be sent physical messages constantly, constantly numbers, people, like just messages constantly sent to you. But what happens, and especially like me when I was in my like corporate, I'm gonna run the world in heels, I had my like to-do list and I was too busy in my to-do list to catch the messages. When I finally slowed down and was like, oh yeah, I've been getting these, I've been getting, I felt this feeling for years, years, years, years, but I ignored it and I just assumed it would go away. But that's the thing is it doesn't go away.

Right.

Because when your spirit has had enough of like, we've squeezed out of this lemon all that we can get, whether it's a job, a relationship, living in the space, in the house you're living in, living in the country you're living, it doesn't matter. When it's like, nope, we've grown enough here, we're out, it'll find a way to get you out.

Absolutely. Absolutely.

I guarantee. So I've had people that were friends that were amazing at their jobs and didn't see it coming. They get walked out and it's just, they're like, I didn't see that coming. I'm like, that's okay. I'm not just saying there's something bigger coming for you. I'm actually telling you because you can only connect the dots looking backwards, right? You can't connect the dots looking— Correct. So in the moment it seems so devastating.. But it's just like, no, no, no. Universe just did you a total solid. Wait, just ask for your next move and I promise you, you will be given it. But you got to go in. You're not going to find it outside of you. It's about listening. And we call it our intuition. Like our sixth sense isn't I can see dead people as per the movie. It is this knowingness, right? It's our intuition. And so, when you— and it's a feeling that you have. And when you have it, you know it.

Yes.

And I'll never forget when I had like, when I first started coaching and mentoring, I always assumed like, when I was climbing the corporate ladder, I was like, I know I'm gonna work for myself someday. But I always just assumed I'm gonna work my— because that's what I was programmed to do. I'm gonna work my 30 years.. And then when I get to live the good life, when I'm retired, and for those that can't see me, I'm air quoting because that's not the truth. When I get to live the good life, then I'll do consulting or something. I don't know. Right. Teaching. Right. Teaching. I just assumed that that's what it would look like. And then when literally coaching and mentoring, just it found me. I was doing it within the hospital setting, but then when I was like out on my own, I found that I was just gravitating to it. And I said to my husband, I'm like, oh my gosh, like it just lights me up when I see someone like set an intention and then crush it. Like, absolutely, it is the best.

That's why we're here. That's why we are doing what we are doing.

It is now.

So intuition being those messages, and I can, you know, and I can recall very significant, or a large number of them that's happened to me over the years. And so someone's seeing that. It's almost like that commercial. It's a— some college has this commercial where it— someone's being bombarded with messages that getting a master's degree only costs a certain amount of money, and they're kind of— and they're seeing that number everywhere. What do you find? I know you said fear multiple times.

Yep.

But where is— what is about that fear that is, um, causing them to delete it immediately? Delete, you know, the thought or the image or the message, ignore it, avoid it. You know, what is really the inner fear that you find especially those in corporate where everybody thinks, oh, they're confident, strong, powerful leaders. But what, where do you, what do you find that fear to be specifically?

The, I mean, people are going to respond to fear the way they were programmed to respond to fear. So like some people are literally like, I have like parts of my family and we probably all do that are like rug sweepers, right? We'll just pretend that that didn't happen, but really it just scares us. We're going to avoid it. Right?

Why?

Why? It's part of their self-image. It's part of their programming. It's the way that they do. So we have two self-images. We have the one we project to the world. And then we have the one that we hold of ourselves. It's the way we see ourselves. And it's that one that gets us our results every single time. So, but I mean, a lot of people, and I mean, this is a really good example would be like Hollywood, right? There's the way I'm projecting myself. But that's not who I am. It's like a persona, right? And I know for me, when I was working in corporate, like even when I was like new grad, 22 years old, I put on my heels, I painted my makeup on, I put on a suit, and I walked into that boardroom like I owned it, right? Really, I was crapping my pants. I was like, oh my God. And like my habitual thinking is like going crazy in my head, like, oh my gosh, who are you? You don't belong here, blah blah blah blah blah, right? And well, like, all the things, right?

Those are the things that I was looking for. So you're talking the fact that, you know, people are suffering from like imposter syndrome, not feeling good enough, they're questioning their worth, they're questioning their, their value, those type of things.

Yep.

Because for, for what keeps gnawing at me is Do you find that saying that it's their programming—

yep—

is—

does your—

do your clients use that as almost like a crutch and an excuse?

No.

Or do they kind of have to be told by you that that's what it is, and then you, you know, the two of you have to break that down?

Yeah, so I always, um, yeah, we don't use it as an excuse. It is what it is though. But it's like, it's one of those things that it's like, okay, yep, that's the way you're programmed. That's not, it's not your fault, but it is your responsibility to shift it. And if you're going to use it as a crutch, then nothing's going to change. However, what happens is just like you can reprogram your phone or you can reprogram whatever, the branding on your Facebook page, it doesn't really matter. You can reprogram your subconscious mind, your self-image. You can absolutely do that. And you see beautiful examples of this if you've ever watched documentaries on Elvis Presley, Michael Jordan, any of these, Wayne Gretzky, any of these high-level performers, athletes. They will talk about how they— Elvis Presley, he created Elvis Presley. He was, he was, that's not who he was. Like he stepped into that self-image, like he created him in his mind and then he stepped into him. Yeah. Right. And he just like, that's, and that's what we have to do as individuals. Right. So I, when I think back, like I did it unconsciously when I was, you know, new grad getting into corporate. And I was just like, you almost become when you're, when you're taking on a new self-image, you almost become like a self-image klepto. You're like, oh, I like the way she speaks. Oh, I like her confidence. Oh, I like, I like the way she walks. I like the way she dresses. And you just start going, oh, okay, I'm gonna, you know, whatever. But you, what happens is a lot of people start taking on a mishmash of things in their self-image for no apparent rhyme or reason, or they're taking things from people that have nothing to do with where they as individuals want to go. Right? So I ended up, by the time I like figured all this out, I was like, I'm really like a mishmash. Like, I don't really know who I am because I've been, you know, borrowing things all over the place. And yes, it's taken me to here. But then I had the thought of like, what if I did this intentionally? Like, what if I intentionally went through all the areas of my life and said, I want this and this and this and this and this.

I did that.

Right. And then you like intentionally block out all of these areas of your life. And then you become them. Right? Because it's in the becoming. That's what your spirit wants.

It's— well, okay, so maybe I confused myself. So are you saying that that's the good thing that someone should do is go and they control kind of the pieces that they want for them to be?

Yes.

Because I did it in a negative way. I kind of looked at it and went, Okay, I want to become this person that I'm not, and I'm going to take pieces from all these people and become this bitch, because that's where this whole thing came from. Yeah. Um, and then I had to, in your words, reprogram myself when I left corporate and be, you know, and started working on myself 12, 14 years ago, right, to kind of like rediscover who I am. And then, like you said, I, I never looked at it that way, but I reprogrammed by picking what it is that I really wanted to be and bringing that together, right? Is that what you're saying?

Absolutely. So either way, you made a decision. Just like when I was in corporate, I made a decision, but then I noticed I wasn't getting the results. So it always goes be, do, have. But it starts— we as humans, we're always focusing on the having. I want to have the money, I want to have the car, I want to have the job, I want to have the marriage, I want to have the house, I want to have, have, have, have, but we don't ever focus on— there's like 2 steps before that that we got to get to. There's being, then the beingness sets up what you do, what actions you take, then that dictates what you have. So for me, even though I was going, oh, I'm going to like take on all these personality traits and all these things, A, intuitively it didn't feel right. Feel right. So that's your first in— like, it didn't— it wasn't like a, oh, that's not really me. It was literally my spirit going like, what are you doing, girl? Shiny object, but that's a hot mess. Put that down. Right? What was— and again, you'll feel it if you're paying attention. If you're not too busy in your checkoff list, pay attention because you'll feel it. And so then it was like, okay, like, I took on all these things.. But then I wasn't getting the results, right? So it's just like, if you're not getting the results, your results, what's in your bank account, how your health looks, how your relationships look, how you're, how you're all of them, because you get to have them all. If they aren't looking the way you want them to look, go right back to your beingness. Because your beingness, it's all cause and effects. It's a universal law, universal law of cause and effect, right? Being will set up your doing, and then whatever the having is, litter is the effect. So people go, I want the money. I'm like, the money is the effect. Be the person that has the money. Oh, I want the health. Health is the effect. Be the person that's healthy. Oh, I want the relationship. The relationship's the effect. Be the person who has a kick-ass relationship. Like, okay, that person, right?

So, all right, so someone decides right? Yeah, they want to be happy, fulfilled, joyful.

Yep.

And that's the effect.

Yep.

But so how do they then really truly be? Do you find that a lot of, especially, you know, many corporate, you know, individuals who have never kind of paid attention, um, you know, do you find that they struggle actually being, and therefore what can they do to actually be? Because for many, that'll sound woo-woo. That'll be like, woo-woo. You know, that's a lot of like—

for that, I always, I honestly, and even what got me paying attention to it was just the word leadership. I was like, I was like, I want, I want to be a better leader. And then all I needed to be told, your leadership has nothing to do with the letters at the end of your name, which I was in the habit of accumulating. That's how I like defined myself. Me too. So it has nothing to do with that. It has nothing to do with your job title, which again, I was in the habit of accumulating. And it has nothing to do with that. It has everything to do with, can you lead you? And then someone looked at me and said, like my mentor at the time looked at me and said, would you follow you? And I had to start looking at my beingness. And I was like, holy crap, nope, I wouldn't actually follow me. I'd like, I guess if I was told like, oh, this is your new manager. And a lot of people think, oh, I'm a manager, I'm a leader. It's not the same thing. Not the same thing at all.

Yes, we talk a lot about that here.

Yeah, not the same thing. I mean, there's lots of people that will follow out of fear or obligation, like, oh, you got the title of my manager, you hired me or whatever. Or I'm just scared of getting fired because my desire for being here is to get paid every 2 weeks, right? But you're— doesn't mean you're leading. And don't even think that you're going to start leading other people if you can't lead yourself, period. So when I talk to leaders or people that desire to be leaders about that, they go, I mean, it makes sense, right? Like if you're a hot mess, Like, people don't need to know you're a hot mess. They go, well, they don't know that I'm a hot mess. They can feel it because we are all energy, and energy speaks every single time.

So create an avatar for us of a hot mess. Like, create an avatar of the person who is questioning whether they're a leader, right? And they're coming up with like, you're not, you're not, you're not, you're not.

So it's either look like for folks, it's either someone that was like me and that just like climbed the ladder very quickly and is questioning like how it even— it just happened so fast that they're like, oh, I didn't even have time to grow into the beingness of that. That was mine.

Are they insecure? Are they— they're managing?

They're, they're appearing— remember the two self-images— their outward appearance, they look very confident. They're, they're tall, they're articulate, they're, they're their posture and the way they speak, and they can write a mean essay and a mean memo, and they can do all the things. But on the inside, they're literally like, they can't— maybe they can't wait to get back to their office, or they're like having panic attacks behind closed doors, or they're like, other areas of their life are faltering, like whether it's their health, or they have something else that they're pouring into because there's so much fear of being found out over here that they'll pour into. And maybe it's that they're taking a hit in their bank account, or they're taking a hit in their marriage, or with their relationships with their family, or just the other aspects that they're like, I want this, but it's like, I don't know how to have it all. I don't know how to do that. And they're just so scared of being found out, right? Like, how do I— How do I pull this off? I know that's what I was constantly thinking that. I'm going like, what if they figure out that I'm actually not a leader? Like I can't even lead my own life. Like I have like nothing in my bank account or my marriage is falling apart or my, you know, like I have whatever, some sort of like I'm pulling my physically, people have things that they're hiding, right? Like I'm pulling my hair out or I'm like abusing substances or I'm whatever, whatever it is, right? But they don't have to know that because that's not what I'm projecting. That's not what I'm portraying, right? Or I'm in an abusive relationship or it doesn't matter, right? Like there's something, like everybody has something, but it's like, can you lead your own life? And I'll never forget one of my mentors that I had years and years ago. I'll never forget when I realized, I'm like, when I took her off the pedestal of like, she's got the title and all the things that society's like, she had the marriage and the kids and all the things that society says you're successful if you have those things. When I took her off the pedestal and realized that she was a human and really looked at what was happening within her life and it was really chaotic. And I remember for the first time, I was like, oh, like, thank you for teaching me a lot about business and a lot about, you know, what to do and not to do in a boardroom and whatever. But the rest of your life, I literally have to reject it. Like, I want nothing to do with it. Nothing. And it was amazing. And I, because I knew even at 22, I was like, I want to have it all. Like I came from divorced parents and I was like, I'm gonna— this is the way it's gonna look like for me. And I, right, like this is the way I want my relationships to look and feel.

Right.

I don't ever want to— and even at that age, I was like, I love to travel and I love— like I don't ever want to be restricted of that. Here I was hanging out with people that were like, you know, oh, I get 3 weeks holidays a year and I get— and I was just like, And I just, I knew again through the feeling that that wasn't for me, but it took me 15 years. Right, right. And again, the only reason I did that was fear.

Yeah. So what would you, um, what is one or two tips that you would recommend to our listeners and viewers that they could be doing right now as they get, you know, finished, you know, listening to this program that they could start doing to really get in touch with having it all and really going after the end as opposed to the or attitude.

Yeah, I would honestly— you, you have this amazing higher faculty called your imagination. And a lot of people think that imagination is just for kids. And that is the most ridiculous thing ever. What I want you to do is I want you to tap into your imagination. And start using your imagination to ask yourself like, "If I could be, do, and have anything, if my life could look like anything, what do I want it to look like? Like if I climbed a mountain and looked down on the city landscape that is my life, what do I want my health to look like? What do I want my relationships to look like? What do I want my bank account to look like? What do I want my spirituality practice?" Like maybe us talking about out in society land that is going, ooh, universal law and intuition, that sounds woo-woo. Maybe there's something in there that you're going, I don't know, it sounds interesting. And what do I have to lose to learn about it? What does that look like for you? Right? Because even again, in our society, we've confused religion with spirituality. Like, look at what do you want that to look like? Because you get to have all these different aspects that are amazing.

I love that.

That are amazing. And then what happens, and another thing I would then challenge you to do is to start asking yourself, okay, so if this is what I want, who do I need to be in order to have those things? Because it's be, do, have. And a lot of people get stuck in the, yeah, well, I want this car and I live in this house and I'm married to this person. I'm doing this and I'm traveling here. But I don't know how it's gonna happen. Okay, don't worry about the how. Literally don't worry about the how because it literally will, it's the effect. It will start to take care of itself when you decide who you need to be in order to get there.

I love that. I love that, especially that last point. No, you know, not worrying about the how, 'cause so many of us do. And because of the fact that, like you said, the be, do, have, everybody wants the have. Now that they don't focus, and therefore the how, therefore they don't focus on the be and the done.

I love that. I love it. I actually, I have, I have a book coming out very soon. It's called You Can't Mess This Up. And there is an entire section on be, do, have.

Fabulous. Fabulous. I hope that's actually the title of your book.

It is. Well, no, it's You Can't Mess This Up.

Oh, you can't. I'm sorry.

People are scared. They can't. They're just like, I don't want to do it because I'm going to mess it up. I'm like, you can't mess this up.

Yes, yes. Yeah, absolutely. I love that. You can't mess this up. Well, thank you, Delynn, for— this has been fabulous. I so appreciate your time and these great— I have like a whole page of notes here, uh, this great conversation, because it's true for all of our listeners and viewers. You need to be, do, and have. And some of those dos I want you to do is check the— the Lynn out at pursuitinstitutecc.com and be sure to follow her on Facebook, The Pursuit Institute. And we're going to post all of her, uh, connection links, uh, with the show notes, uh, for this episode. But Delynn, thank you so much. I so appreciate your time. I absolutely loved this conversation with Delynn Miller. Of Pursuit Institute, and I want you to check, check her out at thepursuitinstitutecc.com. But she talked about a number of things when it comes to our programming, I will say, from when we're very young even into our 20s, 30s, 40s, and beyond, especially if you haven't tapped into the fact that yes, you have been programmed to think and believe in a certain way. So she shared with us just what you could be doing to, to shift your mindset, to really, you know, move into a place where you really truly understand who you are and what your purpose is. And she talks about the model of be, do, and have. And then she went on to really share with us the fact that we aren't here on this earth, in this life, in this body, with this heart and this mind, to have an or life. We were born to have an and life. And you know, especially as women, we believe we can't have it all. And yet Dolin is like, yes you can. And it's just a matter of how do you identify what it is that you really want, and then how do you be, do, and have. It's— it sounds simple, and yet she'll even express through her own stories as to how that's not necessarily true, that it does take work. However, she is here to help you, to guide you through that process. So it was a fabulous conversation, and I hope you kind of dug deep into it and walked away with your own tips. And I would love to know what those might be. So please do. And I would love to know what your feedback or what you walked away with is. So go out to LinkedIn and share with us on any one of our number of posters or share a post of your own to really help Dallin and I understand what did you walk away from really understanding how to have an and versus or attitude and become that powerhouse leader you're meant to be. And I also am so grateful that you were here with us today to have this discussion, and I will look forward to having you on another episode of Shedding the Corporate Bitch. Have a great week.