Bernadette BoasExecutive Leadership Coach, Trainer and Speaker, Ball of Fire Coaching · Become the Leader Everyone Wants to Follow and No One Can Overlook.

Why We DENY Conflict: Understanding Human Reactions

27 Jun 2026 · 0 min

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When conflict hits, we instinctively deny it, get defensive, and blame someone else. The only way out is to pause and actually think instead of reacting. That moment of stepping back is what lets us move past the denial.

I think one of the things we talked about before we went on camera is we are all human and we all react to conflict very similarly initially, unless we're able to step outside of that initial reaction and say, let me think about this for a second. Right. But our initial reaction is usually one of confusion or misunderstanding or miscommunication or not me, not ever. I didn't do anything wrong. And at some point, some of that doesn't even matter.