A short interview-style video transcript featuring Beth Ridley, CEO of Brimful Life, on why empathy matters in workplace culture and how to develop it. Ridley defines empathy as understanding others' perspectives with compassion, links empathy to trust, collaboration, and better business outcomes, and offers practical steps (slow down, be curious, listen, practice vulnerability). The discussion also addresses concerns about wording across differences and reassures that genuine curiosity usually outweighs verbal missteps.
Chapters
Today, the importance of empathy at work. We are all happier, of course, if we feel respected, we feel cared for. But the truth is, if co workers appreciate and understand each other, it's also good for business.
That's right. Beth Ridley is a corporate consultant who transforms workplace culture. She is also the CEO of the Brimful Life, and we're so excited to have her back.
Hey, Beth. Hey, Beth.
Hi. Good morning, ladies.
Good to see you. I love that you're talking about empathy, because someone would think if you're working with big corporate cultures and executives, empathy is the last thing to talk about. But truly, it's important. So let's start with just the basics. How do you describe empathy to someone?
Yeah. So basically speaking, empathy is just being able to put yourself in someone else's shoes. Right. So being able to understand situations from another person's perspective, and most importantly, leaning in with a sense of compassion towards your colleagues.
So why do you think empathy is important at work?
Yeah. So, you know, even in normal times, when people feel more understood, that really sets the foundation for a culture of trust. And if you have a culture of trust at work, that leads to better collaboration, people feel more comfortable taking risks, and all that leads to better decision making and better outcomes. And then I would say in 2020, given these really unusual and challenging unprecedented times, people are coming to work with a lot of emotion. They're really stressed out. There's a lot of burnout that's happening in the workplace. And empathy and having that compassion goes a long way to helping employees feel their best at work, even when they may not be coming to work feeling all that great.
So how do you take that to the level of. Then expressing it to your co workers and showing them empathy?
Yeah, I mean, I think there's really three simple steps to developing empathy. I really see it as, like, a leadership competency. And the first is just to kind of slide. I think at work, we're always so go, go, go, rush, rush, rush. We're ready to get into execution mode, and we kind of overlook the people that we work with. So the first is just to kind of slow down. The second is to just have a curious mindset about your colleagues and to ask thoughtful questions about them. And then the third is to listen. I think a lot of times we ask questions like, oh, hey, how are you? And then the person says, fine, and then we move on. No one really listens. So that listening is key to. To help people feel understood and appreciated and valued.
I feel like a lot of people are concerned about expressing or showing emotion at work. So how do you know if too much. Too much empathy is more than is appropriate in the workplace?
Yeah, that's a really good question. I think a lot of people are worried about too much empathy at work. But you don't need to be worried because the research shows that there is a huge lack of empathy at work. So there was a study done where I asked CEOs about empathy at work. 60% of the CEOs said there was a lot of empathy in their work, but only 20% of the employees would say that they felt empathy at work. So I don't think anyone's at risk of too much empathy. I think the only caution is to not express sympathy, which can get more into, like, feeling pity or sorry for someone's misfortune, and that can come across as condescending. But empathy expressed in a really genuine way, it's just simple care and. And compassion and curiosity for coworkers. And I don't think you can ever have too much of that.
I think that's great. So, okay, we all know people who are not empathetic. If they are not, how do they learn to be? How do you actually encourage them? Or how does someone themselves learn to be more empathetic?
Yeah, you can actually learn to be empathetic. Like, you can learn anything. It all comes down to practice, practice, practice. So I think the first thing is just kind of like, force yourself outside of your comfort zone to spend more time with people, especially people who are different than you. So you can just appreciate different life experiences. I think lead with questions, thoughtful, meaningful questions, and again, be sure to listen. But I think the key is also to seek to listen, to learn and understand, not to agree.
Right.
Or to necessarily take action or to do anything. A lot of times when people share with you what's on their mind, how they're feeling, they don't want you to solve their problems. They just want to be heard. So simply acknowledging someone else's experience is really enough. And then I think the last thing to do is to also take a risk in terms of being vulnerable yourself. Share a little bit more about yourself at work, and that helps to prompt other people to want to share. And it kind of fosters this whole culture of empathy.
Real quick, Beth. I think sometimes people avoid questions, especially with people who are different, because they're worried about the wording. For example, there have been discussions I've had at work between, should you say African American or should you say Black? What's more appropriate? People talk about indigenous people, Native American Indians, things like that. Do you think maybe we shouldn't get so caught up in the wording, or do you think the wording is extremely important as it relates to empathy?
Well, I know a lot of people are reluctant to engage in dialogue, especially across differences, because they don't want to embarrass themselves or say the wrong thing. And I would say that as long as you're approaching someone with genuine curiosity and compassion, even if you stumble over your words, people are really forgiving. And I think the most important thing is to don't ask someone to speak on behalf of, like a group or a community that they may represent or be a part of. Ask someone what they prefer. So, Molly, as an example, if you were going to ask me, do black people prefer black or African American, if you were to change that and say, Beth, I'm curious to know, how do you prefer to refer to yourself in terms of your race and ethnicity? And I think that can actually open the doorway for some really genuine conversation. It can deepen the relationship. I think a lot of people are concerned. If I have what could be a difficult conversation across differences, I'm going damage the relationship. They think about what could go wrong. I would say think about what could go right. And deepening a relationship at work again leads to that trust and really that strong foundation to do really great things from a business standpoint.
Such a great point. So many great points. Thank you so much, Beth. I appreciate your time.
Good to see you, Beth.
And you make such a great point, encouraging all of us tomorrow, ask at least one colleague, how are you? And invest a little time to actually listen. Tell them Beth sent you. You can find out more about Beth. Well, thank you. Thank you for listening.
