EP036 - Mindset by Design - Andy Murphy

Anyway, let's go and help some people do good.

That's why it's here. So this is the whole Man Academy podcast. My guest today is Andy Murphy, who is, I'm pleased to say, a friend and someone I've followed for over five years. And he's the host of Mindset By Design podcast. He's a mental strategist, performance expert for CEOs, business owners, and much, much more. Andy, first of all, welcome to the Wholeman Academy, episode 36. How are you and where are you?

Awesome. I'm pumped to be here, to be honest, mate. And it's cool that we got to hang out the other week as well. So we've done 12 hours of talking already, so this is gonna be fun. Right now I'm sitting in Scotland. I'm going to Liverpool tomorrow to visit family, and then I'm back over to the States. And if South America was open, I'd be talking YouTube from there.

Probably a bit warmer than here. And I know you just touched on it there. I mean, firstly for the guys listening, you know, I first met you probably five, five and a half years ago, and the way that happened was I started listening to podcasts and yours was one of the, you know, one of the first ones I listened to, which I always say kind of saved my life because it helped me gain the confidence to actually leave the city and not just accept a. Another job in the treadmill of boredom and unfulfillment. So I would say, you know what, what that gave me was a stronger mindset, which was listening to your. Either you talking or interviewing guests and sometimes just having, like, even if you listen to half an hour, you might have one nugget of wisdom in there that you're like, fuck, yeah. Like, that's.

That's big, right? That's the power. That's the power of being around people.

Yeah.

And that's the beautiful thing about podcast in general. How amazing the. That we go back to the 80s. I'm getting old, mate. But we go back to the 80s. It's like there was pirate radio. You remember pirate radio? There was these people setting up, like, yeah, off the norm, and they could talk about anything that they want. Well, guess what? That's a podcast.

Imagine that. You could talk about anything you want.

Anything you want. Hey, that's true. For now.

Yeah, that's another rabbit hole we'll go down. But so for me, yeah, that's one of the things I've learned is about cultivating relationships and just staying in touch with people. And say five and a half years between us meeting the first time and then spending for me a mind blowing, probably eight or ten out of Christ knows, hours we spent sitting together. And here's one thing I'd say about that. I'm not sure how many people in the world that I could sit with for eight hours just on our own and talk and at the end of it, be like, we haven't covered enough.

It's true, man. Right, but shouldn't that be with. Shouldn't that be with everyone we pull around us? People get stuck in such situations with family and old friendships or careers that they get forced around people that they don't really have anything in common with. But it's like a UK's thing, right? It's like I haven't lived in the UK for 18 years, you know, back in two. But it's like, it's the pub, right? But you go to the pub. I'm not a big drink or nothing like that. But if you go to the pub, you're around people who you have nothing in common with but drinking.

Yeah.

And most people who drink well, they're there to escape reality. Right. And it feels like that's what's happening in the world right now. But a lot of people, the escape through so many different ways, the escape through sabotage, the escape through Shiny Object Syndrome, or beating themselves up or holding themselves back, it's constant, this cycle that I see. And when I come back to the uk, I'm so happy that you started your podcast, dude, because it's so needed here. I swear on my life, and I'll get shit for this, but it's at least, at least 10 years behind the mental of America, the Australia. It's literally 10 years behind of personal development. They have no idea what it is over here. It's like, I think everyone just thinks of Tony Robbins. Tony. Tony's cool, but, you know, good to have options. Yeah, it's not everyone's cup of tea, you know.

Well, I tell you what, I always say that. I mean, that's one of the reasons we met with through Tony Robbins. You know, I listened to your podcast and then I heard on one of your episodes that you were going to see Big T. And I tweeted you, and we kind of literally managed to have a quick cuddle in the front row, which sounds a bit, sounds a bit weird, like we were 14 at the cinema. But with the UK, I totally agree. You know, for most of us, you say, okay, well, who are the main people to do with personal development and especially if you go niche on men as opposed to just anybody and you're like, dunno. But you go to the States and you've got Brendan Burchard and you've got Tony Robbins and you've got, you know, I could list them all off, but over here, I wonder, why do you think we're 10 years behind?

It's interesting. The way I've looked at it is genetics and a culture difference. I look at the UK as, it's so old, it's such an old hierarchical structure that there is levels, right. And so everyone's come from working class background so that you're not showing options. Yeah, this very small box. And it's like I said, there's a hierarchy all the way up to royalty. So it's always been that way. When I look at places like Australia and the us, well, guess what? The people that came into that country were savages, in a good way. You know, take some balls to go across the ocean, right, and then set a whole new country up. So their genetics were entrepreneurial. Their genetics from the start was their belief system was growth to create. And that's the same with Australia. So what I've seen is that that's in the culture. So when they talk about the American dream, well, what does that really mean? But it means that you can build a business very, very easily, you can do whatever you want. And it's this, here's the difference, it's encouraged.

Yeah.

When we go to the UK mindset, guess what, it's very difficult for me to do my job here. When we hit the highest level, that's fine, but, and I've spoke on, you know, the Marriott's Mayfair with all the rest of it, but it's, it's, it's like they don't quite believe it, right? It's like, I've done this for 20 years, you know. Yeah, but you're not happy, mate. Yeah, but I've done this for 20 years. It's what I know. Yeah, but, and so what happens is it's beautiful that neuroscience is caught up and it shows, the evidence just shows complete evidence of the structure of the brain and constant change. Right? And when we can, when we can understand that, you can't really dispute what happens in the brain looking at neuroscience. So that's what a lot of the world. And when I work with high end people, that's what attracts them because it's like that's the evidence. But in the uk, it's not like that's not showing as much. So it's not that people aren't clever, it's not that people don't want change, it's not that people aren't awesome here. I love them, but it's like they've been suppressed without, like the. Here's a classic example, right? New Zealand and the UK are very similar. Australia and America are very similar.

Right.

Very interesting. So I lived in New Zealand for a long time too, as well. Well as Aussie. But it's. It's like they call it a tall poppy syndrome over there. You heard of that before?

Yeah.

Is that where you. You know, once you get too high, up above everybody else and. Not necessarily it means you're better than them, but you're maybe in your mind you're thinking at a different level. Is that right?

Yeah. It's getting so much like this. You've got the grass, then a beautiful poppy grows above the grass, right? What does the lawnmower do? Puts him right back down to be like everybody else. So think about it. In this country, right? And it's not just this country, but it's a lot of countries. But if you stand out, what do people do? Ah, look at him. He's a show off, this, that. What's he doing? Look at him. Who does he think he is?

Yeah.

If you stand out in Aussie or the States, they're like, wow, how'd you do that? What are you doing there? Wow. How did you do that, man? That's brilliant. Well done. It's encouraged. But that's the problem, right? And it's going to take a time for the UK genetics to evolve and change. But I've come back over here, over, as I say, over 18 years, all the time for family. And it's so amazing to watch the culture change, like, evolve and grow. And it's starting to blossom now and it's a beautiful thing. And I think because the uk, there's some amazing people here, so talented, and it's just like, if we can get out of our own way and understand that our brain literally is creating reality, we can guide it, tune it, we can change it. And the other side is you don't have to do the same thing that you've been doing for years. You can change.

Yeah.

And it was like when I first left school and I'm sure you had the same. And everyone in the UK is going to relate to this. Careers officer comes in, right, the last few weeks of school, right? And the careers office comes in. I remember this so vividly. Man. And all these folders and each one was like a career or a job. And I went through, I spent hours going through everything. I went to this guy, I went, I don't want to do any of that. What else is there? And he went, what? And I said, I've been through everything, I don't want to do any of that. What else is there? And he looked at me and he went, well, that's it. And he literally turned his back on me.

Yeah.

And carried on helping someone that wants to be in a factory.

Yeah.

No one asked me what I'm good at. No one asked me what I like. No one asked me or said, do you know what sales is? Have you ever thought about a business? It wasn't an option, it was military. Be an electrician, work in a factory.

Yeah.

And that's such a shame because there's such talented people who want to get out into the world, they want to help people, but it's just like the system here doesn't encourage or allow it. And it's mad. It's mad. It's not just the uk, but it's such a shame because I really have such a passion and a love for entrepreneurs. I've seen like thousands and thousands and thousands of clients all over the world. That highest level royalty to startups, to everything you can imagine in between world champion athletes, trauma. I've worked with it all. And the truth is, it's not that I'm a magician with this stuff. I just know what to do. I know what buttons to press, I know how to remap or rewire people's thinking. And if I can do it, I ain't special, man. Everyone can do what they want. My biggest thing was when I was going through, I was putting together a project when I was young in Fiji. It was a resort and I went through bankruptcy, nervous breakdown. I got ripped off by my business partner and I literally lost everything. And that was another rebuild.

Yeah.

But what it does, the pain, it's beautiful. I love the pain. Because what it does, it gets you clear on what you don't want and it gets you clear on what you do want. And it was back then, it was like going back, obviously a long time ago now, but it's like I knew that I didn't want to have anybody at all ever telling me what to do, ever. I can't handle it. I was the best employee for about a year and then a nightmare because it was just. I wouldn't listen anymore. And when we can come from that Place of understanding that, man, you can build anything. It sounds cliche, it sounds cheesy, but it's the truth. And all the evidence backs this up. It's like, it's like an athlete, right? An athlete doesn't just become an athlete. Doesn't happen. There's ups, there's downs, there's training, there's dark days, there's highs days, there's wins, there's losses. But does that stop the athlete going and competing and potentially winning that gold medal?

Yeah, it's part of the journey.

Part of the journey, man. Same with us as human beings. Not talking about business, let's talk about human beings. It's the same thing. When we start to understand the brain, or a neuroscience study is called neuroplasticity, what that means is the brain constantly wants to adapt. That's human beings in general. Genetically, epigenetically, chemically, neurologically. We all just want to adapt. It's like if we put a group of people in the forest for long enough, guess what? They're going to adapt to the forest. Right? You put people in a city, they're going to adapt to the city. If you put people in an already organized societal structure, they're going to adapt to it. Give them the freedom, going to adapt to it. That's just how the brain works. So what the beautiful thing is about traveling is when you get there, nobody knows you. And because nobody knows you, you are allowed to be the fullest version of you.

What a lovely thought.

Yeah, it's, it's. Dude, it's amazing. This is how I was able to grow because the only thing that somebody else knows about you is the things that you tell them.

Yeah.

You're not going to tell them all the shitty bits, you're going to tell them all the good bits. And what you're growing, going to do and where you're moving to and what you want. And because of that, you're allowed to expand, you're allowed to find out who you are. But like I go back to just outside Liverpool and it's changed now. But for a long time my mates had treat me like who I was when I left. But I've become one of the best in the world. I've become like, I've become like. I've put massive projects together. I was the best salesperson in two different countries. There's like 18 years of growth there, man. Right.

I guess they wouldn't even be able to get their head around that, would they?

They don't understand it. And there's no reason why they should. And it doesn't make it special. It's just like. It's just like I can't understand the journey of a swimmer going to the Olympics. I can't understand someone else's version of reality. Yeah, this means is we've got to be kind on everyone around us because everybody's had such different experiences, they've made different decisions and they're living in literally a different reality, a different world. Neural nets, which is the software, the filter system in our brain. We are literally seeing every single one of us, literally seeing a very different world, a different reality. And the thing is, we've got to be kind because I worked with years ago, I worked with a lot of trauma victims and everything. People doctors couldn't fix them. And we're dealing with the unconscious mind here, right? So that's the bit of your mind that blinks you, breathes you. It's your body mind, right? It's your nervous system. So when doctors couldn't fix these people, I was able to every time. Why? Because it's the patterns or the programs or the images that are all messy inside people's brains, right? So when we can understand that every time we have an experience since we were in the womb, right, Our nervous system and brain is making decisions and it's forming paths or images. So, for example, right? So a lot of people have money issues. So if your parents, when you were in the womb and your parents were arguing, stressed all the time outside about money, for example, understand that what's happening inside that fetuses and unborn brain and nervous system is there going into fight or flight response. Amygdala is getting lit up right before they even get out to the world. So then instantly in a shit, this is dangerous, then they step out into the world and oh, what's happening is your parents are just arguing about money. It looks up at these godlike people who you adore and trust with your life, and they're arguing and stressed about money all the time. And then people go, well, as a little kid, you're like, oh, damn, this money thing. This is stressful. I mean, I don't deserve this. What's happening here, the world, this is how our brains build. But then when they say the rich get richer, it's, it's, well, think about it, right? We have something in our brain which is a part of our brain called mirror neurons. Mirror neurons are. My description of them is a. This is the part of our brain that was developed or enhanced before we have Verbal communication. So that's the bit of our brain that we learn in tribes from fire techniques and hunting techniques and things like that. Nlp, we call that modeling. Right. So modeling means we look at the strategies or the thoughts of how somebody does something. Okay. That's plain and simple, your brain. Again, we go back to the adaption, right? The human beings adapt. So, so if, here's a classic example. So if you watched horror films every day for a month, how are you thinking by the end of that month? Yeah, you're a weirdo.

Yeah.

You've got problems.

Yeah.

You've got a few issues, man. Right. But if you watched everything about Elon Musk for a month, how are you thinking about business and life and the future and what's possible? And do you think Elon might have had a few people saying he's crazy, trying to take us to Mars, building holes under LA or. You know what I mean?

Yeah.

But the truth is that's his reality. So when we start to understand, if you hang, you've never drank a day in your life and you go and hang around with people who drink, what you going to start doing? Right. You've never trained a day in your life. If you go and hang around with people who train, what you're going to start doing? Go and hang around with billionaires, might not become a billionaire, but you're going to be well on your way. But why? Again, the mirror neuron immerses and starts to become what it's around the most. So think of about people who drink, what is their topic of conversation? Different alcohols, probably escaping from the world, moaning about life. Right. Athletes, what are they talking about? Health, fitness, getting good abs. Performance.

Yep.

Performance, Unseasonable performance.

Yeah.

Mental, physical performance. Billionaires, what are they talking about? Absolute massive growth opportunities, connecting 20, 30, 40 year missions. Right. That's what a billionaire is thinking. Look at those three different worlds.

This, I think that's exactly where, going back to when I first started listening to your podcast, when you would say, you know, it's the software that plays in the background of your mind, as.

It were, where that plays in the background of the computer.

Yeah, that's it.

And I'd be thinking, okay. And then you would discuss, you know, who are you hanging around with, you know, the average of the five people you're with and etc. And I kind of know it sounds ridiculous, but you start sacking people from your life who are draining your energy.

And there's a ways to do this because people have hard like, everyone listening. And I know you're. You're about empowering men, and I love that too, because men have been slapped everywhere in the last, like, five years, 10 years. And there's nothing wrong with. Course, women need to be equal and empowered. Of course they do, the human beings. It's insane that they're not. But what's happened is, is. Is the culture has then put women on a pedestal, which they kind of should, but they sure should put men there. But what's happened is men have been demasculated. Men started to not know their roles.

Not just gonna say it's confusion. Like, what. To the basic level, should you open a door for a woman? And is that. Are you being. Are you saying that she's incapable of the strength of opening the door herself? I mean, I've had that one suggested. And you just, like, I'm not sure if guys know what they should or shouldn't say, especially this world.

Right. This nuts. And it. I think it is the challenge with social media. I think social media is an incredible thing, but it's also a nightmare.

Yeah.

Because. Because of the algorithms and the culture that it's made now, it's made very attractive people. It's like male and female. It's made people go, oh, I know how to do makeup. Hair. I know to be fit and healthy. So they look a certain way. Now it's Instagram, but it comes from darkness. Always comes from darkness. There was an interesting post I saw. Yeah, you've got to have a body like a God. You got to have a brain full of demons. And it's true. But that's also the same with different types of success. You know, it's absolutely the same. The sacrifice that it takes to achieve what you want is. It's unbelievable. It's unbelievable. But back to social media. Social media is an interesting thing, as you sure you've discussed this on the podcast. I'm sure everyone knows about this, but the algorithms are creating an addictive behavior. It's an addictive behavior to different chemicals in the brain. And the biggest one is dopamine. Dopamine is produced. It makes you feel good when you produce when it's novel, not whether it's negative or positive, when it's unique and novel. So what happens with the algorithms is it's literally. Literally like doing cocaine or any other drug. There is no difference.

But cheaper.

Yes, it's cheaper. It's cheaper, but it might not be cheaper in the long run, because what's happening is, how good do you Feel when you come off social media.

It's a strange one, isn't it? No.

Because you might be for a little bit, but then you start to dip. And then it's like what people do. Back on clicking.

Yeah.

Or move around the board, as it were. I know, and I've spoke to people about this, where you go from Twitter to Instagram to Facebook to, you know, Snapchat to TikTok.

TikTok now.

Yeah.

And then when you finish, you're like, oh, fuck, what if there's something I've missed on Facebook, there's a new notification, and I go back around the board again.

And that's escapism.

Yeah.

Go back to that PC world that it is now. People are. You people are confused. They don't know who they are. The media. The media has always done this. But now with social media, it's unbelievable there. What people don't understand is the algorithm gives you what you want to see. So if you're. It could be anything. If you're into cigars, and that's all you'll think, guess what? Everything is going to be cigars. Everything that you see, the advertising, the world, everything. You go on Google, everything's not going to be about cigars. And so it's all for the dollar revenue. But the truth is, what happens is people don't know what the truth is anymore.

Yeah.

They don't know who they are anymore. And I always compare marketing to the biggest marketers in the world. Well, they're not so much anymore. Hollywood. Hollywood's changed the world. Right. But I always. I always ask this question, who are the people are the most famous in Hollywood? The Brad Pitts, the people like that? Why are they famous?

Because they get put in front of us.

They get put in front of us, but they're uniquely themselves.

Mm.

Every. Most people who go to Hollywood try and be like them.

Yeah.

They're not themselves.

The next Brad Pitt or the next Arnie.

Yeah.

But that is the thing. We're constantly influenced by everything around us now. Right. If you watch CNN every single day, you're gonna think the world is on fire right now. You're gonna be freaking out. Right.

It's owned by Disney, isn't it?

Oh, is it? I think sounds about right. So we'll fact check that.

Yeah.

That doesn't mean anything anymore. Fact check. What's that? Right?

Yeah, Fact check. Fact check. You can do what you want.

Yeah, it's true, man. So this is the problem. People haven't got a fucking clue who they Are.

Yeah.

So what's happened is. And whether this is intentional, not intentional. We've been taught in society to focus external. Everything is about external. Not just social media, but cars, houses, everything is external. Well, that's an interesting focus. Well, the thing that actually creates the external is the internal. That's how it works. That's just how it works. Whatever your images are in your head dominantly, that becomes your focus, that becomes your filter, that becomes the muscle, that becomes your reality. Fact. Right. So when we understand that, then it's such a shame that people get caught up in the BS and I've caught being caught up in it years ago. We've all been caught up in it.

Yep.

Guilty. At some point.

Yeah, man. But the truth is behind it, none of it matters. It's about living your life. It's about doing what you want. And something we spoke about the other week was it's I think the millions and the mansions as a focus has to go or it's already changed.

Yeah.

What would someone prefer? And there's so people selling the Lamborghinis and the Ferraris and. But what's the fucking point in having a Ferrari or a Lamborghini, right. If suddenly your income's taken away and this is what's happening. You have Matt, like Cirque du Soleil just gone under.

Yeah.

What?

Yeah.

What?

The first of many.

First of many. So. So when we look at that, what's really ultimately we build businesses and as I say, thousands and thousands of people and ultimately I'm working with people who were like mansions in the Hollywood Hills and all the rest of it. And what's interesting is they build these businesses but ultimately what do they want?

Freedom.

Interesting. Right.

See, I would never come up with that word until three or four years ago because I would say I want to work in an office, have a six figure salary, you know, people are impressed by what car you drive. Etc, etc. Three or four holidays a year. Wow. And then I had my mind fucking ripped open by, you know, people like yourself. It was like, really?

You sure?

And that's why I think for. And never has a time, never has it been more relevant than now because so many people. And again we're talking the men here, but it doesn't really matter who's listening. The men here, like most people are probably a lot of them asking like what the fuck is going on? What is my future?

And that.

Yeah.

And guess what happens when we are on shore again? Again, your fight or flight response. The amygdala is going to do three things. You either you're going to flight, meaning escape, sabotage, look for shiny objects, anything to escape TV addiction, social media addiction, drug addiction, you know, all of these things, right? Or you can freeze. This is the other response to the amygdala or the fight or flight response. Freeze. That's what a lot of people have.

Done, is that do nothing? It sounds obvious, but basically just like. It's like burying your head in the sand.

I just don't know what to do. I don't know what to do. I don't know what to do. I don't know what to do. I don't know what to do. Do. Right? And that's the same with a project that could be. I just, I don't know what to do. I'm overwhelmed. Freeze. Then to escape. Right? Right. We've all done it. We've all done. The third one is fight. But it's a fight. Not as in an intense. Let's go get it. It's a fight as in shit, we're in danger. We've got a fight, man. Right? That, that's fight. That response is no good. It's no good for anything. I lived for a long time with chronic anxiety. I didn't know it was anxiety. I thought it was being revved up, ready to go. No, it's anxiety. It causes damage to your cells, damage to your brain, cortisone spikes. So you. In your chemicals, you can't think. Right. You're in a constant state of fucking frazzled. The reaction to life is wrong. Your communication goes wrong. You cannot be creative. Right.

Guessing your immune system would be suppressed as well, or hammered.

Right? And all of this affects you. So there's another way to live. And it's. It's this. I'll teach this. I don't usually talk about this stuff on podcast, but there's. This is like Secret Squirrel stuff. But one of the things I found is that through 18 years of doing this, being a top performer myself and working with all of these high level people, I learned from them. I learn from them. And what I've worked out is by trial and error, but also all the science backs it up. And now Joe Dispenza is talking about it. I usually teach it a different way. Say like a trader, for example, right? The trading and the caught up in the head and they can't make that decision to come out of the trade, to go into the trade. So their brain is like, fuck, fight or fight, right? Are we gonna fuck it? Let's do this. Or shit, I don't know. Oh, man, I just need another cup of coffee before I make this decision.

Procrastination.

Yeah, exactly, procrastination. So what happens is this response is all in hell. Now, when we connect to something called the heart brain, or the chest brain as I call it, we've got to understand that the chest brain actually has 40,000 neurons. It has its own brain. That's why they're finding, like, in the gut, it's more serotonin produced in the gut than the brain. Now, serotonin is the happy chemical, right? If our diet's off, our gut flora is off, which means then we're not producing serotonin. And that's how we can get chemical imbalances and we're not happy. Right. But when we come from the heart brain, everything changes. And I mean, everything changes. Your intuition, you make rapid decisions. You feel your gut feelings in sync. You're not reacting, you're present, you're calmer. So do you think that might be beneficial for a top high performer?

I was thinking short and long term, everything.

Yeah, you're right, dude. Absolutely. And so there's so many of these things. I can go on and on and on and on and on. But there's so many of these things that people just don't understand. But the other side of it is the average person doesn't understand. I should say. Yeah, higher level, you go. They just have mentors and coaches constantly around them for everything that they're doing. But like the 99% of the world, like, what's this stuff? Look, you weak, bro. Step up, bro. What you been? What do you mean you're sad? Ah, fucking get over it. What do you mean? And it breaks my heart because I've had the nervous breakdown, you know, and I suffer from stuff. And you can't explain to something. We talk about mental health because that's something I know is big in the whole man academy. What's really mental health? A little bit controversial here, but. Yes. Is the genetics. Yes. Is the chemical imbalances. For sure. Do people have certain things that can't be explained? Absolutely. Right. Depression is a real thing. Yes. But let's look a bit deeper. It's messy wiring. Understand this. If you are thinking about your dog that died 20 years ago. Every single day, all day, how's your emotion? Yeah, right. What's going on inside of you? What's the chemical? Right? You're sad. That's the dominant image. And then you go back through all the memories and, oh, my God, I can't just can't get happy. I can't get motivated. Right, look what's happening in your brain, right? So that is just an example of everything, right? So trauma, trauma, kids, is not just abuse, it's not just violence. Trauma is what they've discovered over the past X amount of years is that trauma is really an intense moment that your nervous system gets like, bang. That's really what trauma is. And neurologically or your brain, it gets something called a synesthesia, the neurology gets bound together like that, it gets locked, right? So then guess what if that's locked and that becomes like a, like a set point, like this thing inside your brain and we've got lots of those, right? That's where chemical imbalances, I believe, and everything comes from. Now, does it mean you can't be born with stuff? And of course. But what the finding is, a lot of this stuff can be cured through correct diet, nutrition, fasting, right? And changing your brainwave frequencies, meditation, programming it correctly.

All the natural stuff, Surprise, surprise.

Yep, surprise, surprise.

Unfortunately, people can't make loads of money off that, can they, you know, go.

Down that path, mate. But yes, yeah, it's the same. It's the same with what's happening in revolution in the US right now is around cannabis and also suicide, which is magic mushrooms, and mdma, which is ecstasy, right? But the thing about what they find in right now, and this is all becoming legal because it's so effective at deleting and resetting the nervous system, getting rid of trauma. You've got Obergain, which is abogain, sorry, which is, which basically has a massive success rate, if not like a 90% success rate, are getting people off opiates and drugs.

That's huge.

It's a fucking plant. Yeah, you know what I mean? Suicide, magic mushrooms. They're showing that it's completely getting eradicating Post Traumatic stress disorder. So is mdma. What? MDMA is actually from a tree, the tree in Thailand. So it's all natural. They've been doing this stuff for thousands and thousands and thousands of years. We've just come along and society in the last, what, hundred years has gone, oh yeah, we can make this stuff and then let's control some brains. And every. I think everyone's intention as a scientist, I think it's the right intention. I do. You know, the pharmaceutical level, that's a different thing. That's just about their number one value is money. A scientist probably comes in, the number one value is health and secure the disease. But then guess what? They don't get funded. So it's a messy world in everything. It's the same way to go back to social media. It's ad revenue. Everything's about ad revenue. Alexis, Is it Alexis? No, that's my friend Alexa.

Yeah, we switched that. We've switched that as off.

Yeah, mate, because he's missing it.

Yeah.

And why is it listening? You could go down the conspiracy or you can go down Jeff Bozo's goddamn clever because he's making sure that he knows everything that you want to buy. His intention in the future, I've been told, is to get predictive packages. So because you've been talking about it, they send it you and if you don't want it, send it back. Yeah, you know what I mean?

I spoke about that with. I spoke about that with my. At some point he'll be my father in law and he's always been very. What's the word? I'm trying to think what it is but you know, suspicious of all this.

This.

Anyway, but when I was explaining it and kind of talking about it, he's just like, I mean there's a technical term. Just like, what the fuck?

It's a good technical term.

Yeah, just what are you talking about? Like. And he understands that, you know, you're not making it up. I mean, I would say the most dangerous thing you can say at the moment is that won't happen over here.

Right, let's.

Here's again, I think at the moment, especially with what's going on in. It sounds so weird to say across the world. I mean, you know, let's just talk about the UK is that I think so many guys and say a thing I know from just my, you know, my circle of friends and or guys through the whole man academy that there's a lot of uncertainty about and that be your career, your wealth, you know, your, your fitness. If the gyms have been closed, a lot of guys have stopped doing exercise. If you were taking on a guy and let's say a professional guy who maybe is on a six figure salary, so maybe the money's not necessarily issue at the moment, but he's saying he's unfulfilled at the moment. And I think there's such a difference between three or four years ago, unfulfillment, there was a lot more options than today where a lot of people are losing their businesses that had good businesses. So it wasn't a bad business choice. If you own a brilliant gym and you were raking the money in and you lived a lovely life. Then they're like, sorry, close your gym for three months and they'll probably close it again throughout Christmas and New Year.

Then you're fucked, basically.

So the game has changed for guys like you, I think, or for any of us that do coaching. It's a different challenge now because those guys that were doing well and probably might not be doing much wrong have now had the rug pulled from under them as well. Where do you start with that?

Sad, innit? Yeah, sad. And it's no one's fault and they're working their ass off and they're doing nothing wrong. The mindset was great. It's just things have changed. So what do we talk about? Adaptation. What has to happen. So people, people get stuck in a comfort zone, right? And the comfort zone is a boundary condition in the brain, right? And they get used to and the brain wants to feel comfort. So certainty, one of the values, right? Certainty. So what happens is right now it's about, it's about getting to the truth of what you want. Because just because our opportunity isn't there anymore doesn't mean there's not opportunities.

Yeah.

And so it's about getting to the truth of what you want. And the world's moving online, deep in this world for a long time, so it's fine. But looking at everyone, it's like, wow, okay, everything's moving online. So what you're going to get to is the truth. And we spoke about that word before. Freedom. It's what people want.

Yeah.

No, I remember my second 5 series BMW getting taken away through bankruptcy. It's like, do I really want that? I don't give a shit about it anymore, to be honest. And that's what I feel is happening right now. The things that we thought was important, the things that society showed us was important and we connected to our own self worth and value, right? So what's happened is all of these things are being taken away from people so now they've got no self worth. Especially in the uk, like when I lived here, I was all about Hugo Boss of money. Could I afford it? No. Did I wear everything? Yes.

Yeah.

It's identity means nothing. New Zealand got me over that. I was wearing like a thousand pounds worth of clothes and some guys wearing a fucking five pound T shirt and everyone oh, that's an awesome T shirt. No one cares. No one cares. But the point is, it's like, I'll tell a story. Real estate guy I worked with the end of last year, been Doing it a long time. He was successful, but really just dipped. Like, just. Just real estate's about hammering that phone, right? That's what real estate is. And it just wasn't. And now there was trauma there with these daughter things like that. We cleared all that up. But really what I got to very quickly was the truth of what he wants. So what is this, man? So you get the money, you build the business, you build the empire. Now, what he said, I just want to just travel and work in missions and help people with. My wife said, cool. That's it? Yeah. How much money do you need for that Coming in? He went, truthfully, I want to help my kids and stuff, So I want 20 grand coming in every month. Autopilot. Cool. Do you give a shit how you make that money? Obviously, ethically, Da, da, da. He gives it. No.

No.

How fast do you think he was hammering that phone? How motivated you think he was hammering that phone so he could build his nest egg so he could invest and get this thing he was building. Last time I spoke to him, he's building acres of storage units. That's how he was gonna, like. All I'm saying is that all of this noise, people in panic. He was in panic, freaking out. Money was harsh. Everything was nightmare. Everything. What's the truth? Oh, fuck. This is easy. Now I got clarity.

Yeah.

That's the point. So what people have to do is they have to get truthful about what they really want. That could be £2,000 coming in a month. It could be £5,000 coming in a month. It could be £10,000 coming in a month. But ultimately, how do you want to experience earning that money? Want to go in a million dollars? Beautiful. How do you want to experience earning that money? I want to build a massive, massive empire. Cool. How do you want to experience building that massive empire?

Such a good question.

It's powerful, right?

Because your brain's like.

Right.

I don't know where I came up.

With it, but it's. It's powerful. And. And that's what people have to go to now. They have to. There is no choice, right? How do you want to experience your life? So, to me, we rewind the clock to when I was 28, going through breakdowns and everything like. Like that there was a moment in time where I had to sit down and I was living in an MMA gym, training, scrapping, every day, man. So my focus was that, but really, that was escapism, Right? So then I sat down and worked out what I really want, and it Was to be anywhere I want to be from my laptop to earn a thousand pounds sitting by the beach. It was to work with pro MMA fighters at that point. It was all of these things and that got me so clear. Did I know how? No idea.

Yep.

I couldn't even afford rent or food. But guess what happened? Turned down a job in Hong Kong to work for a massive real estate developers and instead borrowed money and flew to LA for five days for a personal development course, an op course. Came back, knew what I was going to do because I got very clear on how I want to experience my life.

Yeah.

Once you're clear, then what else you doing?

You're either working towards it or away from it. Whatever you're doing.

Yeah.

So it becomes very clear when you have that clarity. So people who are lost right now, they need to sit down and understand that the world has changed. People's psychology has changed forever. It's changed. Right. So we can focus on what was, or we can change our focus and start looking for what I call the next bleeding edge. Not the cutting edge, the next bleeding edge of what's about to trend. What do people need support with now? Now, right? Not in 20 years, not last week. What is going on now? The psychology that it is. So for gym people, well, guess what? Your facility isn't fucked. It's not. You just need to adapt and evolve. So what does that mean? That means leveling up with selling nutritional supplies right now. That means leveling up with building a community online. And also guess what, Destiny training online. Why can't you still do one on ones? You can, you can do that in the physical place. One on one, you can. So there's all of these different ways I could look at that business and go, okay, how do we adapt, change, evolve, look at structure, rebrand, connect to. Do we change the audience? Do we level up? Do we make, what do we do here? There's so many different things and that's going to continue. So if we looked at your existing business model and then what the unconscious mind does is it's like a horse with blinkers. So if you've got one option, that's what you'll focus on. How the unconscious mind works is we open up, we present mostly options. Then what happens is your unconscious mind will find the one that's congruent or excites it the most. That's how we build a business. Constantly adapt and build options. Expand, expand, expand, expand. Play around with possibilities until the right one clicks. And that's how everyone's got to look at their business. Every single person has got to look at their business right now for that reason. Because things have changed. So we can go, oh, it's not. It's the unknown. I don't know what to do. I don't know. Here's a classic saying I've said to myself for a long, long time. Solve the problem.

Mm.

Oh, that person let you down. What the fuck are you telling me for? Solve the problem. You got no money. Why are you telling me? Yeah, solve the problem. Or you feel sad. Solve the problem so you're happy. That's the responsibility of what we need in life. That's the responsibility of what we absolutely need as an entrepreneur. And we need that to become the best version of us. My rule is if I'm still doing the same thing as I was last week, then I'm not 100% moving forwards. Yeah, it's not happening. Right. If I'm doing the same thing last week, I'm not moving forwards. People do the same thing for 20 years. So if we're in a constant cycle of perpetual growth, then everything should be always changing.

Yeah.

As opposed to just. And I guess that comes back to sitting at the same desk or, you know, I sat at the same desk for maybe eight or 10 years, looking out the same window, looking at the same people. And one day you're like. And it sounds like a dull question sounds, but like, is this it? Because you're like, fuck. If I've got asked permission if I'm allowed to go on holiday, then that's, that's the starting pistol for me to be like, okay, you know, it was fine when you're doing when you were young because you didn't have any other thoughts on it. Be like, is this what I'm going to do? Am I going to be sitting here.

When I'm 50, when I'm 69? Yeah.

And still people still got friends who are, you know, basically sitting, doing the same thing and probably on less money, some of them now, but they're like, well, it's too scary to think of what else to do.

Are they happy?

I don't think so. I know several. A lot of my friends that weren't happy but because they were getting paid, you know, a six figure salary and they've got to have their Mercedes or their Range Rover and their, you know, expensive gym membership and their expensive watch, what have you. And I'm like, listen, it's like you, there's no if that's what you like, that's Great. But I feel that some people are sacrificing, living a happy life to maintain all the shiny stuff that is to impress other people.

It's 100%. It's external validation. When the only validation that we need is inside of ourselves. Everything that we do, for everything that we do. The only validation is that you have done your best. Then there's no guilt, there's no shame, and it doesn't matter. And the journey only stops when you stop it. Yeah, that's the point. Your growth never stops. Little, little side note, this is again, I don't share this often, but maybe I told you this the other week, but one of the biggest, most powerful things anyone's ever said to me is my grandma, my nan. And this was a lady that I was very close to. She'd read thousands of books. We're talking thousands of books. Not educated, no money, thousands of books. Knew everything about every religion, every topic, everything. I was up until she died at 86. I was still talking to her about astrophysics and quantum physics and spirit. This is an intense lady, right?

Wisdom.

Oh, man. Where I get it from, right? Is this. So I just talked to my nan, right? Called my nan. So I talked to my nan and every single human being, just like this. This is me. I don't. It's not an act. This is just me. And, man, this gets emotional every time I bring this up. But she had a couple of stroke, like multiple strokes by then, and it wasn't quite my nan anymore, you know?

Yeah.

And. And there she was. It was about a month before she passed away. And I said to her, all right, Nan, okay, here you are lying on your deathbed at 86 years old. What's the golden nugget to life?

Yep.

And, dude, she paused back. I remember this. She paused and turned and looked at me and she said, none of this matters. I said, what do you mean, none of this matters? She said, do you think for one moment that anything you've accomplished or not accomplished, the things that you've bought, the things that you haven't, the grudges that you held, the grudges that you didn't, the things you stressed about, do you think any of that matters when you're lying on your deathbed at 86 years old?

Yep.

Two ways you could take that. You could go, what's the point in trying? Or the way I took it, what's the point in not trying? Yeah, it doesn't matter. So if I win at this or fail with this, all of it doesn't matter. You can't fail at anything. You just evolve. So for everyone out there listening, man, if I can create a nice life, I don't give a shit what's going on in yours, so can you. I could go into all the trauma that's been through my life, but does it come up? Does it get triggered? Oh, yeah, there's loads of childhood mad stuff that happened to me, but you get triggered. Then you go, well, let's deal with this, let's get over it now what? And then we move on. You fall down, you're tired one day you can't do anything, then sleep, get up the next day and get going again. That's it. What else are you doing that's so.

Important, I think, for people to listen to? And I maybe learned from that myself because, you know, working for your yourself, there's always some things to do. There is. No, I'll switch my computer off at 5 o' clock and I'll come back on, you know, Monday morning and the markets open again. The weekends for me would just do whatever you want, which usually involved, you know, football, dating, dancing and nightclubs and getting drunk.

The.

Some of the, Some of the good stuff back then.

Yeah.

But working for yourself, there's always, you know, I've got a list of lists of lists of lists of things. And sometimes it had to be like, even on Friday, I finished doing various coaching sessions and God knows what else. And then at 2 o' clock in the afternoon, I was like, I just need to lay down. And I fell asleep for two and a half hours. And when I woke up, I felt so much, you know, once I'd kind of got myself moving again. You felt so much like you just downloaded a load of shit off your brain.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. And it's important. That's what people, that we go into circadian rhythms and sleep. But it's like sleep so important. It's so important. And it's undervalued as a high performer. Right. When you've got Gary Vee saying, just keep pushing, it's like, Elon Musk, you're gonna die soon, dude. He knows it, though. He knows it. He's just pushing so that he's redlining constantly. But what I know for certain, I have health issues now because of extremeness in my life. Yeah, Maybe it's getting hit in the head a lot when I was young, whether it's nervous breakdowns, whether it's just, whatever, genetic, whatever. I have a lot of health issues that I manage and including staph infections that I get from, I've got from grappling and stuff. And it's, it's why. No, it doesn't matter where you are, what you've got. If your health isn't right, you just can't. You just. It all goes away.

It's exactly what we, we sent a, an e letter out to all the people on our, on our kind of list the other day and it was very much about your health is your wealth. And we've all had it where you can be having a great time and things are going well and you know, I, when I worked in the city or when I left and everything's going really well and then you're ill for a day or two and then suddenly back to what your gran said. Nothing else matters because you can't function properly. And that's where I see it with high net individuals earners work in the city, brokers, traders or owning your own business. It's all good until you're unhealthy. And once you're ill, it doesn't matter how much money you've got in the bank.

And it really doesn't. I have a friend and an old client and he's. Yeah, man. One of the top marketers, Internet marketers in the world. One of the top guys in the world for what he does, like tens of millions of dollars. Nicest guy in the world. Nicest guy in the world. He went through a two year battle with his daughter with cancer, right?

Yep.

And lost her.

Yeah.

And then guess what happens. Twelve months later, his wife gets cancer. Now, whether that's psychosomatic and I believe it is. Do you? And he traveled the world with his daughter to get medical. To get medical. Every treatment natural and not every fucking thing. She still passed away. So it didn't matter how much money he had. No, doesn't matter in the science.

And I guess he'd give it all away to have his daughter back.

For a day. Yeah, for a day. And that's what I get to. With everyone. It's the truth. What people think is they're gonna live forever. You're not.

Newsflash.

Yeah.

You're not. Right. So this life goes so fast and as I get older, I'm 42 now, as I get older, what you want radically changes. Radically changes. Because what was important before, it doesn't become important. The more wisdom you have, the more life experience. For me, this is just about. It's about freedom to the utmost level, to the point where I can disappear That's. That's where. That's my whole mission right now. And you will not find me in the next five years, which, the way.

Things are going, that's a probably a good plan to have.

I've had this plan for about 18 years.

Yeah.

What's taking you so long?

Hey, I'm already doing it. But that's the point. That's what's important to me now. And security and safety and making sure my girl's okay. Being happy and not caught with demons in my head. Live. And I also know if I got too much free time, I'm not good. My brain, I'm not good. I have to have movement. And that's because of dopamine and chemicals, stuff. Like, we have to have movement. It's also intuition. It's also alignment. It's also, what the fuck are you living on Earth for? You know what I mean? It's like, that's my point. And that's why every day I do my best and hand on heart to hand, help everybody I can, everybody with passion. Because, one, there was no one there for me back in the day. Like, nobody. So this is why I'm resilient with stuff, because nobody helped me. And the other thing is, people shouldn't have to go through the pain that we've been through because there's other ways to do it. And do you know what I mean? It's just like, life goes so fast. We got to enjoy it, and it doesn't matter what's happening in someone's life right now. And I mean this, I don't care, because you're more brilliant than what you can comprehend. What people are holding on to is what's done. It's like watching a movie and watching again and again and again, expecting a different ending. It's gonna end the same. So we've got to now work out what the hell we want and build it. That's it. That's it.

Yeah.

Someone asked me a question, and I have to jump in a second. By the end of your life. I think we spoke about this, but the end of your life. Would you prefer $100 million or to have helped 100 million people?

Yep.

It's not even in comparison. Some people will say, oh, $100 million. Well, that means I could go and help more people and more people. Right? Maybe not the question.

Yeah.

Would you prefer to help 100 million people to have $100 million?

It's another one of those powerful questions. And again, I had one when I was being interviewed on a podcast, and they said, you know, what do you want to be remembered for through the whole man academy? And I was like, instead of me saying, I want to help 100 million guys, because that adds a huge amount of pressure to you, but I was just like, you know what? I'd like to have had, like, helped thousands of guys do life better.

Win kick.

Now, I know you need to go. I know you're a busy man. You've got things to do, people to see and places to go.

It's been a lot of fun. Always awesome hanging out with you, mate.

And how are the best people want to get hold of you? Is it head to your website?

Yeah. You can head over to andymurphy Biz biz. And you can go over to the podcast Mindset by Design.

That's it.

Covers it all. Well, I'll say this, Andy, I love you too, because I really mean you changed my life and the trajectory of it, which means that, you know, I probably wouldn't have kids now with Emma if I hadn't have started down that route. And that sounds a bit deep, but perhaps that's for another podcast and we.

Should do another one.

Mate, I'm sure we've got enough to.

Cover content and also we got to get you on mind, dude. So let's set that up in the next few weeks.

Love to. Absolutely love. That'd be an absolute pleasure.

Of course, mate. Of course. Perfect.

Right, well, Andy, thank you for your time, my friend and I will speak to you soon.

Absolutely. Bye, everybody. And I'll see you soon.

Bye.

Bye.

Bye, mate.