Victoria Lioznyansky - Brilliant Speakers Academy

Do you ever feel nervous when we start this show, Shannon?

Sometimes, you know, a little bit. And I kind of like it. You know, it kind of makes you. There's electricity in the room here, right? When I'm. When I'm recording.

Yeah, no, of course I'm. I'm on. Right. We are public speaking here. But I think that little bit of nerves, I'm like you. I like it. In fact, that's my litmus test. I have found, you know, I spend parts of my life on stage, doing the podcast I consider on stage, but also truly on stage, either public speaking or playing music. If I'm about to go on stage and I don't feel a little bit of those nerves, that's an indicator to me that I don't care about what I'm about to do.

That's right.

And I've been in that scenario and I've learned to walk away from those scenarios. I mean, I'll do whatever that next performance is because I've likely committed to it. But beyond that, it's like I might want to make a change. Like this is a good time for some self reflection. But that level of nerves, fear, that's healthy fear, unhealthy fear, there's paralyzing as well.

And this show could quite possibly be the most important small business show you've ever listened to, especially if you have a fear of public speaking and are looking for ways to overcome that. And all of us have that fear. We just described this mild. You know, our nerves are set on edge a little bit. And that, that I, I as well find that a good motivator to be sure. I'm very prepared.

Keeps me sharp.

Yeah, keeps you sharp. That's right. But you know, as small business owners, you're going to be public speaking no matter what you do. And one of the things that I love about this guest today is that she is going to talk about how you're public speaking all day long. It's not just about getting up on a stage in front of a room full of people. Of course, you may have that opportunity to do it in career as well, but it's also about talking to your employees or your suppliers or a banker or anybody, somebody, you know, an investor when you're making the pitch, so to speak. So fine tuning those public speaking skills goes well beyond just that, thinking of a large group of audience, and it helps you become a more confident business owner over time. So I'm excited to hear this show today.

Yeah, no, I'm excited too. This is A good one. We've got two sponsors for today. TexExpander.com podcast and. And Meetotis.com SBS we'll talk more about the details of that once we've had a little more of the show. But shall we. Shall we get to it? Shannon?

I'm ready to small business, man.

I am ready to small business, too. He is Shannon Jean. I'm Dave Hamilton, and this is Small business show, episode 291.

As soon as we are in a threatening situation where we're in front of an audience, where we immediately go into that space in our mind and what if I'm not good enough? And I think that's where. That's the reason why most people are afraid of public speaking, because they immediately get into that space. And it's just. And it's. And it's natural for us to be afraid, to be less than, you know, to be not good enough. It's completely natural. And people who are not afraid of public speaking are usually people who don't let that little voice say anything. They kind of squish that little voice and continue going. But almost. Yeah, but almost everybody has it. No matter how much, you know, no matter what kind of an expert you are, you stand in front of an audience and the first reaction is, am I good enough? Are they gonna think I'm good?

I know you love to talk in public, right, Dave? You've had.

I. I do, actually. I miss it. That's one of these things that I've been. I've been really missing. Thankfully, we have the show here, so that's true. You know, keep doing it.

I enjoy, too. But there was a time where, you know, I think all of our lives where it can be really terrifying and.

And absolutely. I think back on the first, like, seminar I ever gave, and, I mean, it was just awful. I was petrified. The audience was upset. It was terrible. Yeah, but that's how you learn. That's how you learn. At least that's how I learned.

Learning to be comfortable and confident, speaking in front of people, it's really important to your business success and also your personal brand and as you develop your talent stack over the years. And a lot of people, myself included, at times find it uncomfortable, at least sometimes terrifying. So today we're going to talk about how to get over those fears and how to add public speaking to your talent stack. Today on the show, we're connecting with Victoria Leznanski. I think I got that right. Founder of Brilliant Speakers Academy. To learn how not only to overcome fear of public speaking, but how to enjoy it and thrive in situations that require it. So thanks so much for coming on the show today, Victoria. We really appreciate it.

I'm thrilled to be here. Hi. How are you guys?

We're good, we're good. I'm excited to learn the secrets here because even I guess over, over the years, I've done it enough to where I'm still nervous, but after it's over, I'm just like, dude, I'm a rock star.

Right?

You feel so, you feel so good about it, right, that you, that you overcame it? Yes, seems like that. So let's start a little bit with your background. How did you get involved in public speaking? Share the story that led you to create, you know, Brilliant Speakers Academy?

Well, I definitely did not grow up thinking that I'll be teaching public speaking. I grew up thinking that I will never, ever speak in front of a microphone because I was an introvert. I'm still an introvert. And I used to be absolutely terrified, terrified of public speaking. I had a really sad, I mean, kind of funny thinking about it now, but kind of sad episode. When I was only 10 years old, I had to recite a poem on stage. And that poem was only given to me that afternoon. And I had to recite it from memory all by myself in front of a huge audience of about a thousand people. And so here I am, a 10 year old girl, all, you know, scared and looking at that audience. Completely forgot everything I learned that afternoon. And of course, you know, I'm silent, I'm shaken, and the audience starts giggling and finally I just run off stage in tears. And after that I'm like, I didn't want to do public speaking before this, now I really don't want to do public speaking. And, you know, it's been quite a journey because I started my very first business when I moved to the United States when I was in my early 20s. And I'm going to totally date myself. I'm very old. Back then there was no, you know, YouTube. Oh. No Facebook or no live streaming or Periscope or anything like this. And when you had your business and you wanted to expand it and you wanted to grow it, you actually had to go out in real life and talk to real people and speak in front of real audiences. And that was terrifying. I was very, very, not ready for it. But I didn't have a choice. You know, when you are an entrepreneur, you have to do what you have to do. And it took me a long time, a long Time. A lot of mistakes, a lot of trials and errors, to be honest with you. Before I truly felt, I'd say it took me probably close to 10 years before I truly felt I completely and totally overcame my fear of public speaking. And what was interesting is that I did it my own way. I tried to read what other people did. Nothing worked for me. I did it my own way. And I was in a completely different industry. I was in the technology industry. I was managing developers and so on. And I did a lot of presentations back then and people would come to me at the end and they would say, hey, you a natural? And I'm like, no, I'm not a natural at all. In fact, I used to be scared. I didn't realize that a lot of people were just as scared of public speaking as I used to be. And that kind of started got me thinking that, wait, I just did it for myself. I know exactly how to do it. I know exactly how to take people through this process of being terrified to being completely comfortable. Why don't I teach it? And that was the idea for Brilliant Speakers Academy. I pretty much, you know, being a left brain software engineer, I just. And I reconstructed every step that I had to take and put it all together. And now I'm teaching others how to pretty much do what I've done. But yeah, it was not my childhood dream.

Sure. So, okay, on the background, so this is not your first business. Correct?

Correct.

You had another company. So, yeah, talk about that because it sounds like you use that forum to kind of grow your confidence and learn through that. Tell us about the other company.

Well, I actually had several businesses, and I'm sure you hear this all the time from entrepreneurs that you bring to this podcast, is that when you are an entrepreneur to the core, no matter how many times life throws you back into corporate, you still get out and you continue getting back into business. And that's exactly what happened to me. You know, it's. It's just something that I love doing. It's something that my thing and my first, my very first business had to do with what I was doing at my job at the time. I was a software developer. And so my first business was a web development company back when web development was just, you know, starting. And a lot of companies needed their very first website and did that for a few years. I had a real estate business. I had, well, have, I should say still my franchise, the franchise that I purchased about seven years ago, and it's called Nutty Scientists of Houston. And basically we Inspire kids to fall in love with science. It's all about teaching kids science in a fun, engaging way. And I grew that company from basically nothing from zero to being the biggest Nazi scientist franchise in the United States. And of course we're speaking pre Covid. You know, then sure, sure. Of course things changed for enrichment and school related businesses. But at the same time, I also started Brilliant Speakers Academy. And so this is my fourth business.

Oh, that's great. So, yeah. Why is it so important for people, especially business owners, to be comfortable with public speaking? And is there some common thread that terrifies so many of us when we do it?

Well, you know, I obviously gave it a lot of thought and I think the reason is it's a status thing in a way. I know not a lot of people talk about it, but that's exactly what it is. I mean, think of yourself. If you've ever been afraid of public speaking, think of yourself standing on stage in front of an audience. What is the first thing that comes into your mind? It's not, oh, I'm going to be awesome. Oh, I'm going to blow their mind with how awesome I am. Right. It's not that. Actually. The first thing that comes into our mind is what are they going to think of me? Right?

Yeah. What are they going to think of? What are they seeing? Yeah, that's right.

What, what are they going to think? That I don't know anything? Are they going to think I'm a fraud? Are they going to think, are they going to realize I'm not quite an expert as they thought that I am? We tend to get those crazy things into our head as soon as we are in a threatening situation where we're in front of an audience, where we immediately go into that space in our mind. What if I'm not good enough? I think that's where. That's the reason why most people are afraid of public speaking. Because they immediately get into that space. And it's natural for us to be afraid to be less than to be not good enough. It's completely natural. And people who are not afraid of public speaking are usually people who don't let that little voice say anything. They kind of squish that little voice and continue going, but almost go anyway. Yeah, but almost everybody has it. No matter how much you know, no matter what kind of an expert you are, you stand in front of an audience and the first reaction is, am I good enough? Are they going to think I'm good enough?

Okay, so I have a question about that. Because I've been in this scenario both the, you know, early on especially, but there's still sometimes, you know, you walk in front of a crowd and you're like, oh, like, am I. Am I really the right one to be delivering this to these people? People, you know, that sort of thing. Midway through, when you realize you're taking a question or something or someone offers something when you realize it is actually true, you are not the best expert in the room at this because someone else that's offering a suggestion or asking a question clearly knows more. How do you, as the public speaker, maintain your confidence in that moment?

This is so good. Such a good question. You know, this is extremely, extremely hard. And the truth is. The truth is you will never be the most knowledgeable person in the room. If the room is big enough, you will never be the most knowledgeable person. You have to come to terms with this right away. Like, you have to say, you know what? No, I'm not an expert. No, I don't know everything there is to know about this topic, but I know enough in my own way to deliver something truly valuable and truly memorable. Yes, person X may know more, but they may not be able to talk about it quite in the way that I can talk about it.

Yeah, your perspective, right?

It's your perspective, it's your story, it's your personality, it's your experience, it's everything that you, as you are bringing to the table, right.

I love it. And no, I like this is what you just said was, you know, I know enough to deliver something truly valuable that can be true regardless of your relative level of expertise to any other individual in the room. It doesn't change. I love that. Oh, this is great.

Absolutely. Because, you know, if you think about. Let's go. Let's say you go to a live event, right? And big conference and the room is packed with experts, right? Everybody knows. And you. And you're like, well, who am I? Well, you can't be in that who am I? Space. Because if you were invited to talk, there is a reason. If you volunteer to talk, there is a reason. And that reason is you have a certain perspective that's going to be super duper valuable. And they're going to be. And let's say you and I, we were exactly the same level experts kind of knew exactly the same things, right? And we were. Three of us were invited to speak at a conference on that topic. And all three of us are going like, oh, man, they know just as much. How am I going to stand out that's the talk. That's. It's kind of a limiting belief talk, because if three of us spoke about the same subject and we kind of had kind of the same knowledge of that subject. Right.

Yeah.

All three of us will deliver a completely unique presentation that's going to be interesting in its own. I'm going to deliver it in a way that aligns with my experiences, with my worldview, with my anecdotes, with my sense of humor. You're going to do the same for you. And it's. The audience may not even realize we talked about the same thing. That's how different those presentations are going to be.

And we could each learn something from each other, regardless of the fact that we came in with equal levels of expertise. Because. Because of exactly what you said. Our ex. Our expertise may be the same, but our experience is different. I like this. Great. Absolutely.

And, you know, it's something that I just actually spoke on a live stream not long ago, and I sent an email to my audience about this, and I think it's a really good analogy is, you know how different artists, different songwriters. Not songwriters, different singers, I should say. They sometimes perform the same song. Right. It's like a. It's a different cover. And there was this very famous song in 19, early 90s by Shineto Corner. Nothing Compares to you sure you've heard of it. Everybody knows it. Right. And what I didn't know is that Prince was the first one who recorded that song.

Oh, that's right.

I didn't know that it was Prince. He never published that song. And then after he passed away, his estate actually released the footage. So that was only two years ago. And so all of a sudden his song is out. It's exactly the same song. Now we're talking about same melody, same words, word for word, exactly the same song. But if you watch those two videos, you get a completely different vibe, completely different story, completely different experience. And this was, word for word, the same. Each of us, we can sing our own cover. As long as we bring ourselves into that cover, it becomes our own interpretation of. Of that same story. Nothing is new is new under the sun. Right. Nobody can say something that's so truly unique and mind blowing, but we can say something in a way that is our own angle, and that's what's so important. That's why I like to give cover as an example, because.

Oh, that's perfect. I'm a musician, so you're hitting me right where it counts. This is great.

Yeah. And so. And that Also now, the other side of it, and as a musician you will totally relate to it, is, you know, how some people record exactly the same covers at some else records. Now if you take somebody else's cover and copy it, they're going to be nothing new and you just missed your chance to add something new to the conversation. Right. So if you go out there and you do a live stream, you do a podcast, you do, you know, a presentation from stage, and you try to be somebody who you really admire and you just try to sound like them and you try to act like them because, you know, you're afraid of public speaking and you're trying to show up confident. And so you, you fake confidence, you try to appear confident by mimicking somebody else. You are doing yourself a massive disservice because now the audience actually didn't get the advantage of seeing the real you. And very often, audience sees through it. Very often audience realizes that you are just pretending to be somebody you are not. And that's why it's so important to be yourself. And I know it's hard and scary. It's like when you're trying to be yourself in front of an audience, it's like showing up naked. It's like all of a sudden you have nothing to hide behind.

Yeah, you're not, you're not just covering that person's version. You're doing your own thing. And. Yep. And it feels a lot more naked.

And it feels a lot more scary. But this is truly where the magic happens, where you can deliver. Answering your earlier question. You can deliver the same presentation that somebody else delivered five minutes ago, word for word, but you can do it in a different way.

You know, this makes me, this gives me an idea for like a conference where for an hour, you know, maybe 10 different people deliver the same five minute speech. No, like this could be really interesting, you know, Anyway, all right, this is awesome. I want to take a minute here and talk about our two sponsors. First up is a new sponsor for us, and that is meetotis.com SBS Otis knows that digital marketing can be complicated, time consuming. And that's why mega retailers rely on expensive AI technology to run all of their campaigns. With targeting, conversion, measuring, automatic optimization. Well, with Otis now, entrepreneurs and small business owners like us can access the same technology at a budget level. That truly works. Otis is an easy to use mobile app that uses that same powerful AI tech to help find new customers who will love your business. Otis analyzes your existing customers using data from your point of sale system and then uses that artificial intelligence to find them and other people like them who could become your customers, and then targets your ads to them online. So with Otis, there's no need to learn multiple complicated ad platforms. You can easily create ads for Facebook, Instagram and Google right from within the Otis apple. Once you do that, then Otis will optimize your daily budget across those three channels based on what's performing best for you at any given time. And of course, you can manage your campaigns and view your results from the Otis app in real time. And Otis is super affordable. Many of their clients see impressive results for as little as $10 a day. This is a real headache saver, right? You pay Otis weekly, they pay the socials, and then your ads just work because they're being targeted to the right folks. So you've got to check this out. And we've got a deal for you because we want to get you started with Otis. Our special offer is a 14 day free trial plus a $25 ad credit, but only when you go to meetotis.com SBS that's meetotis.com M E-E-T-O-T-I S.com SBS are thanks to Otis for doing what they do and for sponsoring this episode. And next up, of course, textexpander@textexpander.com podcast. This is one of those apps that like, when it's not running on my computer, I notice it immediately because with textexpander, I have all the things that I type all the time. And these are canned email responses like customer service stuff or sales inquiry replies. Right. Things that I'm saying all the time. But I want to have happen quickly and accurately because they are representing me and my business to potentially someone that's just now meeting us. Right? Very important. You want to be casual but accurate. And you can meet that by getting in there and tweaking that message once. Then you put it in textexpander. Now it's on all my devices, it's on my computer, it's on my phone, and I can just go boom and send right from there. So I see a query come in, I see something, it's like, yeah, that's it. But I also use it for things like my email addresses, my phone numbers, even short little things that I type all the time but are subject to me fat fingering. And with a phone number or an email, you fat finger it. You're not going to get the call or the email, are you? No. This is why I put this stuff in textexpander. That way, it just works. And textexpander can be used everywhere. Like I said, it syncs. You can even have textexpander sync for your entire team, right? You put the snippets in. Either you or maybe someone who's better than you that can edit these things and really make them shine. They do the edits. You put them into textexpander. It syncs amongst all your team, not just you and them, but everybody. Now, you've really got a powerful platform to work from, and everything is consistent and efficient. So check it out. Go to textexpander.com podcast show listeners get 20% off your first year textexpander.com podcast our thanks to Textexpander for sponsoring this episode. All right, Shannon, why don't you take the next question?

Yeah, this is great. That information that is profound, though, that you're sharing about, it's really the power to be yourself, right? And giving yourself permission to get up there and do it from your perspective. So I love that. I love that. So is there a typical type of person that reaches out to you for help? Small business owner, larger company, or is every customer different?

You know, everybody's different, but most, I'd say most of my students fall in one of two categories. They either small business owners or they are employed and they need it for their career.

Oh, okay.

A lot of people, you know, when people say public speaking, a lot of times they're, you know, they think, oh, that's speaking from stage at a conference. Right. But public speaking is everything. Public speaking is such an everyday thing now. Particularly now that we're on zoom, right. Every single day and everybody works on Zoom. And now we have live streams. So, you know, you're a business owner. It doesn't mean you have to go and be on stage. Especially right now, right? You are doing your live streams, you're doing your podcasts, you're recording your videos. This is all public speaking. Or if you at work, you presenting on the status of your project in the meeting, that's public speaking. And so a lot of people realize that being scared, not being confident enough to speak up, even when you know that you need to speak up at work, let's say, but you're not confident enough to speak up, this hinders their growth in a company or that hinders the growth of their business. So. So I'd say those two categories of people are the ones that need help with overcoming fears.

I like that. Because you're. You're so right. Because you're you're public speaking all day at, you know, whether you're online, like now in zoom, or you're in the conference room, or you're talking in the. In the walkway with a few, you know, of your peers. So I think that's really important to recognize that. That's great. So how long does it. I mean, I'm really fascinated about the process. How long does it usually take for you to kind of get somebody to the other side to overcome this fear of public speaking? I mean, I'm sure it's different for everybody, but is something that's ongoing training that's needed, or do you kind of reach a point where you're like, oh, I got this?

You do reach a point where you got this. Because here's the thing, and it's mental. It's all mindset. So once you are no longer afraid of an audience, you are no longer afraid of an audience. It's not like you're going to forget how to not be afraid of an audience. You literally, once you overcome that fear, it's yours forever. You stay with this sense of freedom and confidence forever. Because the truth is, you can't be like, oh, all of a sudden, I'm scared of my audience again, because your mindset is not there anymore. It's not about. Again, as I said, it's not about trying to, you know, apply certain techniques and tips. And all of a sudden, you show up confident or you appear confident. It's changing who you are on the inside. It's really building up your inner confidence so that you never have to worry about, am I showing up confident or not. All you have to worry about, am I delivering what I need to deliver. Because, you know, you are confident enough, and that confidence is gonna shine through anything that you do and the way that you speak. So, no, you don't forget it. Yeah, but at the same time, it is a process. Like when I was doing it for myself, of course, it took me forever because I didn't know I was making so many mistakes, you know, mistakes that everybody makes, truthfully. You know, I was trying to practice and practice and practice, like everybody says, right? Practice makes it perfect. And I was never getting any better. I was still scared. I was still trembling. I still felt like a fraud every time I stood in front of an audience, which made me realize practicing more is not a solution. It's practicing the right things that's a solution. Not just practicing more, being scared the whole time. And it took me a long time to figure this all out. But now that I put it in the system, so when my students go through it, I take them step by step through everything that they need to know. So how to tackle fear from every angle, you know, how to understand what fear is and know kind of the logically what fear is and the science of fear, how to approach fear from the mindset perspective, how to build inner confidence in you, which, you know, has a lot to do with public speaking, but also is for everything, it's for.

Everyday situation far broader than what you're talking about.

Yeah, absolutely. Approaching fear. We, we, we talk. One of our favorite quotes from early, early on, when we started doing the show five years ago, was someone who said, avoid making fear based decisions. And I mean, it just, it, it, you know, we, we've remembered it, we've regurgitated it, we've sort of internalized it. But you know, one step towards that is to learn to recognize and manage fear. And that's one of the things you're helping people do. You have to help people do in order to get, get them up on stage and comfortable. Public speaking.

Yeah, right. On stage or in front of a camera, you know, either way, it's the same process.

It's all on stage. We're on stage right now.

Yeah. The world is. What, how, how does it say the world is a stage and everyone is an actor? Right.

All the world's a stage. That's right.

Thank you. I'm totally not saying it right.

We got you, we got you.

So is there now, are there some common misconceptions about public speaking that, you know, hold people back? Something that, you know, keeps people from being successful or even starting, you know.

Oh my gosh, where do I start with this? There are so many misconceptions and I know you're familiar with a lot of them as well. You know, one of the biggest misconceptions is you. That public speaking is a talent. That public speaking is a talent that people are just born with. And if you're not born with this talent, you know, you'll never be good at it. Which is a complete, complete, complete. I don't know how to say it without using bad words, but it's a myth. Yeah, here we go. It's a myth. And the reason why people think so is because, you know, sometimes they see some, I don't know, stand up comics, you know, comedians that are like so good at being funny and, you know, and it seems like they're natural and yeah, some people are just extroverted and some people can Just talk non stop. I met those people. It's amazing. But a lot more people are, I'd say, like me, you know, who are a lot more introverted, who are not looking forward to, you know, speaking to a bunch of people who are more reserved. And no, I didn't have a talent at all. Zero talent for speaking, zero talent for being out there and talking to a bunch of people. So it's a skill. It's a skill that can be taught, can be learned, can be internalized, and can be practiced. And so that's, that's one of the biggest misconceptions anyone can learn to be a great public speaker. Absolutely anyone. And that goes for a whole bunch of other limiting beliefs. You know, people always say, like, well, I failed in the past. I, you know, I know I'm not good at this, I shouldn't be the one doing it, or I, I don't look attractive enough, or I don't sound attractive enough to be on camera or to be on the podcast. My voice is not, you know, attractive enough. Or people, English is not my first language, or I have an accent. People always come up with certain reasons why they can't. And I like to call out people on this because they're nothing but limiting beliefs. It's like something to hide behind just so you don't have to face your fear. Because nobody wants to face their fear, right? I mean, why would you face your fear? You really are more comfortable not doing it. But for those of us who are entrepreneurs, who are particularly small business owners, we don't have a choice. We cannot spend our business life hiding behind our fears, whatever those fears are. And public speaking is one of those fears. We can't say, oh, well, but I'm not naturally good at this, so I should, you know, I'll never be good at it. Or I'm not. I'm not an extrovert, so I'll never be good at it. So you have to look at those statements and, and truly understand what these statements are. Nothing but a limiting belief that helps us hide behind so that we don't have to make a step forward. And so I think those are really, really big misconceptions about public speaking. And I have had students who came with every single one of them.

Yeah, well, all of us at some point, you know, think like this and, and big part of this show is, is trying to get all of us to overcome those barriers and that kind of loser think in your head that holds you back, overcoming mistakes. I mean, we're huge Fans of them. I'm going to ask you about one of your best ones in a minute here. But I, I also, I want to talk about your business a little bit more now. And talking about Brilliant Speakers Academy, what's been your biggest barrier to success and have you come up with a system to overcome that? How does that work?

You know, with Brilliant Speakers Academy it was a little, I should say a lot easier than with my previous businesses, because with Brilliant Speakers Academy already had the experience of a lot of mistakes that I've made in other businesses. And the biggest mistakes that I've made in previous businesses is that I didn't set up systems early enough.

Ah, we're big fans of systems.

I am a big fan of systems as well. You know, I mean, you ideally, ideally you want your business to run not necessarily without you, but without you being in every little corner of your business every second, right? You want it to become something that runs like a well oiled machine. And that was my goal from the very beginning. It would be so much harder for me to build Brilliant Speakers Academy if I didn't make this massive mistake with nutty scientists and then have been fixing it and actually made it to run like a real old machine by the end. Right before COVID it was just pretty much doing everything without me being involved. But with Brilliant Speakers Academy, I really focused on the systems. And I'm sure you guys talked about this brilliant book, EMI3 visits it by Michael Gerber.

Of course, it's, it's the bible. It's on my counter next to my bed. It's. We talk about it here all the time.

You know, it's interesting how some books make such a profound effect on you. Like some business books you read, you're like, huh, huh, huh. And then you forget the next day everything that you read, right? But this book made such an impact. I read it when I opened my first business and ever since then it was always in the back of my mind. I remember his examples in that book and I'm like, how do I make my business run those examples? And so I would, you know, anybody who is just starting their business or anybody who is struggling with their business, you have to get your hands on that book and really focus on trying to create repeatable processes and that every. And then, and then things become easy or easier for you as an entrepreneur. And so that may not necessarily be, you know, the biggest barrier to success. It could have been the biggest barrier to success. If I have not been, if I have, did not have this barrier to success in my previous business. Let's just put it this way.

Yeah, that's a good system to answer that question. I like it because you kind of spun it, which is good. I'm a big fan of that. We're also really big fans of mistakes on the show since they teach us so much, you know, especially looking back on the them, because I'm sure, I mean, I've made so many. I don't think Dave has made any. But what. What's. What would you say is your best mistake? The one that stuck with you and taught you a valuable lesson as a business owner that you can share with our listeners?

You know, I made a very big mistake when I had my very first business. I decided to have a partner in that business, and I brought. I already had the company going, and. And then I brought somebody who I knew through work, but I didn't really. I was so inexperienced. Oh, my gosh. I was so young and so inexperienced. And we didn't have any paperwork signed, nothing. It was all handshake. And I realized pretty quickly that that was a bad decision, that the partner didn't really know much about what we were doing and wasn't a good fit. But at that point, he was already part of the business. And it was very hard for me to dissolves that situation. And it was something that taught me very early on about two things. Number one, you need to be very careful, very selective of who you bring on as a partner. And number two, sign some papers so, you know, this is not a very common mistake, but still a mistake. Oh, and by the way, speaking about mistakes, can I just say something about public speaking? Because I am. Oh, my gosh. This is one of the reasons why people are so afraid about public speaking in general is because people are afraid of making a mistake, right? You are so afraid of making a mistake. What if I say something wrong? What if I say this way and maybe it was completely wrong or I mispronounce a word or I fall on stage or whatever. People are always afraid of making a mistake. And just like in business in general, you make a mistake and you keep on going. You do not focus on that mistake in the way that you obsess over it. Like when you make a mistake in business, you learn, keep on going. You don't let that mistake stop you in your tracks. Because what sometimes happens in public speaking, right? And this may have happened on the show with you where you are speaking, and all of a sudden you forgot where you were going with it, right?

Let's Say all the time. Oh, yeah.

And it's just when there are two of you, you can play with each other so it's a little easier. But if. Let's say there was one person and you're like, I forgot where I was going. And I already said, like, I've been talking for five minutes, and now I cannot nicely get back to what I was saying. So what? Right? You make a mistake. Okay, what do you do? What do you do in that situation? You laugh. You laugh about yourself. You laugh about yourself. You go, like, so funny. I totally forgot where I was going with it. But you know what? Let me go to the next point, and if I remember, we'll get back.

Or you ask, be authentic about it.

Absolutely be authentic about it. But you have to be able to laugh about. When you laugh about your mistake, your audience forgives you right away. Especially if you. Let's say you are live on stage or you are, let's say, on a live stream, where you get immediate feedback through comments. I had it happen to me where I forgot where I was going, and I just said, guys, I'm so sorry. I completely forgot where I was going with it. If you remember what I was talking about, can you please put it in the comments for me?

I mean, that is. That is a freeing moment, though. I. I now understand. I had a moment like this where I gave the same presentation live in person at a computer conference back to back. There were so many people that wanted to hear it. They asked me, can you stick around and do it again? Which was flattering. It was great.

I.

The first time through, I was terrible, though. I let things get off the rails. It was not good. Second time through, I had my handle on everything, and it was good. But there was a moment where I began sharing an anecdote because, you know, you got to keep it personal and funny. And I could not remember if I had already shared that anecdote with this audience or the previous one. I'm like, I've said this story standing in this exact spot already today. I don't know. But I. And so I just decided I'm gonna look at, you know, these three different people in the front row here, and if their faces look confused, that's gonna tell me that the. That I've already done this. And then I'm. And then I'm gonna. And then I'm gonna fess up and all that. But that moment has stuck with me, and now I realize why. From what you just said, that's the freeing moment where I realized, wait a minute. It's okay to make that kind of mistake. It's okay to make any mistake.

Sake.

Just be honest about it and. And your audience will be with you. No, this is great. Okay, so I have a. A question for you. How. What are. What are your favorite tip or two about controlling a rowdy audience or a. An audience member who wants to sidetrack your. Your presentation with their questions, their concerns, whatever it is, they want to have their own presentation from over there while you're doing yours from over here.

You know, this question does come up all the time in. Among my students in our Facebook group, because this happens a lot, you know, and it may happen in a presentation more like a stage setting, but it also happens in work meetings quite a lot where somebody tries to hijack the conversation. And. Or another variation of that same situation is where you are doing a presentation, say, live on stage, and there is somebody in the room who makes you extremely uncomfortable. They may not be saying anything, but just by being there, they make you extremely uncomfortable. And the best thing that you can do for your mindset is completely ignore that person if you can. Now, most of the time, if you are the one presenting, you are in control of who speaks, right? You are in control of allowing or not allowing questions. So let's say you were allowing questions. Somebody got up and asked some nasty question were very. I don't know, maybe it was just not nice. Polite in the ways they phrased it. Maybe tried to argue with you, and you just have to stay calm, smile, and say, you know what? Let's talk about it just a little later. But let me get back to. And you remember not to let that same person ask a question, and you have to completely ignore them. And then the way you do it is. And you really have to do it honestly. So, like, the way you do it is you put blinders on, right? You put blinders on. You do not make eye contact with that person. You completely don't even look in that part where that person sits. You pretend that person is not there, and you immediately go back to your mindset of I am here for a reason. And that reason is not to argue with this idiot. The reason is hundreds of other people who are in this room that came to listen to me talk about something that's extremely valuable for them, and you put yourself back into that mindset of, I am a giver. I'm not gonna waste my energy on somebody who is trying to create a situation here that's not gonna be even pleasant. For anybody involved, I'm just gonna continue focusing on me being a giver, being. Saying everything to the benefit of the rest of my audience. And I'm not gonna let that one person ruin it for me and for everybody else.

That's great. That's great advice. That we'll deal with it later. Addresses their. Whatever it was they said it addresses it and puts a pin in it. You'll never actually come back to it. But by saying that, it puts you back in control. I like that it puts you back.

In control, but the way you also. But it's also important to say it in the right way. You know, you smile. You don't look like you're about to start arguing, because that kind of a person would feed on arguing.

Well, that's what you're trying to do.

Absolutely. Absolutely. He's trying to create a situation where you and that person are all of a sudden antagonists, and you're arguing and talking over each other and all of that that you cannot let happen. And that's why you immediately go, like, you know what? That's such a good point. But let us get back to that. You always try to, in a way, agree without really agreeing. Right. Without creating a confrontation. So that that person, whatever the negative statement and negative energy that's coming from there, it's counteracted by your positive energy, by you saying that, you know what? It's especially at work, that happens all the time where you go, like, you know what? This is such a great comment. I can definitely see where you're coming from. Let's talk about it in a minute. But let me finish over here. Right. That's what you would do at work. Work anytime, and it works great. And it's the same way you would handle that in the audience setting. But again, you are the one in control. You have to remember, you do not have to get to the level of negative people or people who are there for a wrong reason. Because if there are a hundred people in this room, 99 people are there to listen to you. That one person does not matter.

Yeah, no, that's a great point. This is awesome. Thank you so much. So I have.

Have.

You've already given us so many tips and actionable things. We are huge fans of action here on the show. So before we let you go, I kind of want to give you free reign on this instead of guiding you towards a question. Is there any favorite tip that you like to share about public speaking that you'd like to share with our audience here today?

Absolutely. Let me leave you guys with this because this is something that's absolutely actionable and everybody can start implementing it right away. You know, there is a reason why we go into business, right? Why we become business owners. Especially true with small business. We don't just do it for the money, right? Because the money may not be there. When you are a small business owner, you do it because we prove that.

Regularly.

You do a specific business because something about that particular things that you will be helping people with just ignites your passion, right? There is something, you know, you can open a, I don't know, mosquito killing business, which is, I'm sorry, I'm in Houston though. It's very much a problem here. So, you know, you can open a mosquito business or you can open a business that teaches kids how to have fun with science. Right? You have so many options. But why you choose one business or the other, because you're passionate about it. And every business that you have, you always think about it. How much can I give? How much can I give to my customers? It's not about receiving because as soon as you start focusing on receiving, you, you fail. In business, it's only when you focus on giving, giving, giving, giving the best, the most of you, the best of you. Giving the best of your company to your customers.

Yeah, absolutely.

That's when they become clients for life, right? We all know it about business, but it's the same thing about public speaking. So next time you are turning on that live stream, you turning on that video, you go on a podcast or you are live in front of people, what I want you to do is I want you to focus on being a giver, on trying to do everything in your power to focus on your audience. Because again, naturally, and we started with this naturally, we tend to focus on ourselves and how we're afraid and how we're not good enough. You need to take that thinking completely out and instead focus just on your audience. What do they need? How can I benefit them the most? How can I give them information in such a way that's going to make the most impact that may inspire somebody or change somebody lives? Right? You want to do everything for the benefit of your audience and focus on that only. Because when you focus on your audience and you don't focus on yourself and your fear and your lack of confidence, something magical happens. And that magic is you actually stop feeling fear. You're so wrapped up in that audience and in what they need and what you can give and the stories that you tell and you know how they're looking at you and you see it in their eyes that you are getting through to them. You're so wrapped up in that that you forget to think, oh, I'm scared. Oh, I'm not good enough. And this is a magic moment where the fear goes away. And so if there is one thing that you can do today is as soon as you turn on that camera, as soon as you set up that microphone, you start thinking, not about, oh, it's a camera, it's a microphone. No, who is behind it, it, and how can I make their life better today just by speaking? And that's going to make the huge, the biggest difference.

That's, that's, I mean, the amount, the information that you've left with us today is just so powerful in, in so many ways and well beyond the realm of just public speaking. So, I mean, it's, it's really, there's just some great tips and that we're going to dissect here. And I really appreciate you spending some time with them with us today talking about your business experience and about ways to help us succeed and our listeners to succeed. Thank you again so much for coming on the show, Victoria.

Absolutely. I'm thrilled to be here.

Yeah. And so tell us the best way for our listeners to connect with you and to learn more about Brilliant Speakers Academy.

Well, the best, the best way to connect with me would be through my website, www.byVictoria L for Lesnians. Because nobody can spell it. So it's by Victoria L.com and I have some free resources on my website that you can take advantage of. I have some free training, which is really awesome. You definitely want to grab it and it's going to be the best 12 minutes of your life because I'm going to teach you something in just 12 minutes that's going to make a huge, huge difference. And you can read my blog, you can watch my videos and I would love to connect with you.

That's great. Yeah. I spent some time up on your blog before coming on the show and some, just some great content up there. I love your outlook, your positive outlook, you know, and thank you again. Please come back, keep in touch with us and, you know, let us know how Brilliant Speakers Academy is doing and, you know, take care. Thanks again.

Thank you so much for having me and good luck with everything thing.

Thanks. Wow. I, I, I learned a ton. This was awesome.

She was great. I love her enthusiasm and, you know, her, her authenticity about it.

Right? It is, yeah. Yeah. You know exactly who she is. She's comfortable. She, like you said, she practices what she preaches in. In that she just does it. And yeah, it's great.

And there's so much. Many good tips in here that you should just, you know, listen to this show, go back and listen again. Everything from, you know, the talking about the e. Myth that you should be, you know, reading early stage of your business development if you can. If you haven't, go back and read it now or revisit it. And, you know, also talking about, you know, her best mistake, the. The partnership she set up without any paperwork. You know, we talk about that all the time. Time, you know, and so, And. And that's a great lead in too. You know, our. Our next small business Pocket guide is Publishing on September 1st. We're just getting ready to hit the. Click the button and there's a huge section in there all about why you have to have paperwork. And we also give away the famous working agreement that we talked about here on the show all the time. So you can go get pre order it now. Now we can at the BusinessShow Co guides. If you buy the mistakes Small business Pocket Guide, you get the partnerships guide for free.

That's right.

Yeah.

Yeah.

So it's great. I mean, I really love talking about her. I had a smile on my face the whole time and just some. Some great stuff. So if you need help with your, you know, public speaking in any sort of venue, sounds like she'd be a great fit.

See? Yeah, I, I learned, you know, I, I came in thinking I was an expert at public speaking, and I realized I still have tons to learn, which is always great. It's. It's feeling like you're an expert. I, I find that danger, like, that's a warning sign to me. You know, if internally, like, oh, wait a minute. Can't get too confident. There's always something to learn.

Yeah. I listen to Marcus Lemonis, who's got a show on cnbc, the Prophet. I listen. I went to a conference and he was there. There's only about 50 of us there. And one big thing that he taught was that vulnerability is what connects you with people. Totally. So if you can be real and even if you screw up or make a mistake or, you know, whatever, or tell a story, that's what he did. He told us real, true story about his life that he asked us not to share with anybody else. I'm sure he maybe tells it over and over.

Of course he does.

Yeah. But he's like, please don't share it on the Internet, yada, yada, yada. But you instantly kind of felt a connection with this guy.

Let us smart thing to say. Please don't share it on the Internet.

Please don't share it on the Internet. Let me tell you about something happened to me when I was a young kid and it was a really vulnerable moment and moment and I could see everybody kind of looking, it was all small business owners. It was in Chicago and everybody was kind of looking at going, wow, I've never, I don't think I've had a, a talk started like this before. So, you know, just, it just builds up on the Victoria's comment about authenticity and really being yourself and thinking about what value you're adding to your audience not being so concerned about yourself.

So that's cool. Yeah, no, that's right. It's a great equalizer. Yeah, it is. Yeah, that's great.

I really enjoyed it.

All right, folks, well, you know where to find us. You know where to find the Pocket Guide Business show co is where everything comes from, including your comments. Feedback at businessshow Co. We would love to to hear from you. It we make our day. I would love it. All right, so send us something appreciate. Even if you just appreciate the show and say thanks. That, that means a ton to us. But it does if you have specific comments, positive, negative in the middle, whatever suggestions, send those to Feedback Business Show. And that's all we got. Thanks. Thanks to our sponsors, of course, texas.com podcast and meetotis.com SBS and we'll see you next week. Keep living that charmed life, will you?

Take care.

Of.