Chad Silverstein, 48, explains why he ditched broad networking for a few deep relationships. He has three people he can be fully vulnerable with and credits the Build to Lead program's one-on-one coaching for teaching him that transformation happens in small trusted circles, not through transactional connections.
Questions this video answers
48 years old
Three people
Chapters
I love Bill to Lead's tagline. I remember when it went through a rinse over the past couple years. It used to be together we improve and Chet gave it a rinse and it was together we transform. And I love that because to me it was like it was about me and him. You know, I'm there to make him better just as much as he's there to make me better. And I was a client and then I tried to reverse that. And here's my employees that are coming into the program and I'm trying to transform their lives for the better and they're trying to, you know, know helped me on my journey. And we had just a really cool, really cool thing at my company when it came to the whole build's lead journey and the process and the few people that we had lit up and we had more than a few. I was very blessed with a lot of like minded people who had a growth mindset that, that fell in love with built lead and, and me embracing, letting them dream big. And even if that meant not with my company, I accepted it and no one had to hide it and they were open about it. And I think that was a really cool thing to do. No one is meant to go about things alone. Nobody. And I think one of the, the biggest ways that a government can torture somebody is by putting them in, you know, a cell by themselves and not let them have any human contact. There's a reason for that. We are, we are destined to connect with other people. I have over the course of my career lost the urge to connect on a larger level network and be a, you know, someone who can just walk a room and just connect with everybody. I just don't enjoy it. I've. I've come to just really enjoy deep relationships with a few people and become more introverted and that, that used to never be my thing and that's who I've become and I embrace it. But I still desire the connection, a deeper connection for sure. That's why I love the coaching platform that we have because it allows me to connect with people on a deeper level. It's why I love practice. It's why I love one on ones with my clients. That's why I love spending one on one time with my wife and my kids and why I don't have a huge group of friends that are results of transactional relationships. I'm looking for transformational relationships. And so the always together and the comma after our tagline always together, it's just meaningful to me. And I hope that you can feel that you have this built to Lee community, that you have practice that you can show up to, that you have people that you can lean on. If you don't have anyone in your life, but your aim is to find a few people in your life, throughout your whole life that you do have is one of your few. And you're blessed if you have one. If you have anyone in your life right now that you can be completely vulnerable and transparent with and tell them everything that you're thinking, wow, you are blessed. And I. I will tell you firsthand, I've had three people in my life that I can do that with, and right now, I'm 48 years old, and I feel so blessed to have them in my life, and they're still in my life, and I can tell them anything, and they love me, and they just. They just. We have that relationship, and I don't have to hide anything. I don't have to be someone that I'm not. And that is the goal, is to become someone that can show up wherever you are and whoever you're with as who you are. It's one of the hardest things in the world to do, is to become distinctly you. And our nature, our wiring, is to change other people. It's crazy. Like, you have to be nuts to think that your job is to change your. Your spouse, your friend, your kids. There's no way to do it. If you want to change anything, you got to change you. And if you want change, then you have to be the change, period. And I think there's some. There's so much truth to that. So whatever you're complaining about, whatever you're a victim of, you know, you got to flip the script and you got to look in the mirror and you got to be honest with yourself, and you got to put the pen on paper and dig out whatever it is that you have suppressed, that you have not faced, and just throw it up, throw it up and share it, get it out and let it go. And it is very freeing to be able to do that. And so the first step is to wake yourself up, realize what's there, and get past it so that you can move on and you can grow from it. And that kind of stuff can lock people down for many, many years, where you'll see and you'll hear people's sad stories that they've wasted their whole life worrying about things they can't or delaying what they didn't want to face and deal with because they don't like to talk about it. It's too hard. And again, that's why, again, it's the road less traveled. So always together, Find a couple people, find one that you could trust, and then have some courage to let it out. And hopefully you can find that with someone in the built fleet community eventually. I think that's. That's a gift.
