Chad Silverstein delivers a short coaching monologue emphasizing that word choice and self-talk shape behavior (discouraging words like "try" and "should" in favor of definitive language: "I will"/"I'm going to"). He also advises surrounding yourself with high performers to raise your average and accelerate growth, and cautions against self-sabotage by keeping weak influences.
Chapters
One of the things we do in Built to Lead is we correct the words we use because we know that words matter. And when we're in Built to Lead practice, you'll hear people use the word try and we always stop and we always have them rinse that word. Because when you try to do something, you're not going to do it. I wish I would do this. You're not doing it. I will do it. I'm going to do it is what we need to hear people say. Because you know, your, your words matter and what you tell yourself is important. You know, I should do this, I'm going to try to do that. No, you're not. That's, that's the key is you're actually not. And you've been saying that for a long time. So we're really careful in practice when we are building into our teammates about the words we use and the chatter that we're telling ourselves. And I think that's an important nuance for anyone who's building themselves to recognize when they do it. I work with a client now and he catches himself, he'll say, you know, I'm going to try to do that. And he'll correct himself. And, and I always say it's good, it's good. He, he caught it, you know, and he'll keep doing that to the point where it won't even be part of his vocabulary. So we used to always joke because Chet would talk about Yoda. Yoda always has his one liner that do or do not. There is no try. And it's wise advice from that little guy, you know, there is no trying. You can't try, there's no should. You gotta just do it and surround yourself with people who are going to make you do what you can. That's, that's the aim. You want to always win, then be around people who are weak. If you want to always be the top producer, then be around a bunch of losers. You want to get better and you want to push the pedal. Then be around high performers who are going to make you better. You know, it's true what they say that you're the average of the five people that you hang around with the most. So ask yourself, who are you hanging out with? Who do you spend the most time with? Check yourself and make changes if you need to make changes. Because every day that you don't just hurts you. And there's no point in self sabotaging yourself and your growth.
