A short YouTube conversation (Chad Silverstein + a second speaker) about how unresolved conflict in company culture quietly damages teams. They describe meeting rituals used to surface issues (‘‘clearing’’ before meetings), warn against avoidance, and recommend concrete first steps: write the issue down, talk with a trusted person, then decide whether to address it directly (privately or in the moment).
Chapters
I believe this is one of the.
Biggest silent killers in any company culture. Conflict that does not go addressed.
People who are avoiding the hard conversations.
Not getting it out.
We used to have disciplines on my team. I think I've shared them before, which is that we used to clear before our meetings, we'd have to look at someone and say that we're clear, we're clear, we're clear, we're clean. We used to have all different ways of doing it, but we wanted to make sure that there were no unresolved issues so that as we were talking.
About important, key, you know, challenges in.
The company, that there wasn't going to be sabotage, because in spite of someone else, and I'm pissed off at this person, you know, they're going to kind of just derail the conversation out of spite.
And I think, you know, you got.
To be able to kind of put the problems on the table. And if that means you do it privately, you do it privately. If that means that you have to, you know, address something in the moment with someone, then you do it.
And delaying it and not doing it.
And avoiding it is just. It's a recipe for disaster. And it's never usually as bad as you think it's going to be.
I mean, sometimes it could be, but.
I think not addressing it is the.
Worst decision you can make.
So if you're having a problem and.
You have one right now that has not been addressed, you can at least start by not assuming anything, by not making it out worse or playing the story out in your head, which might.
Be just your version of the story.
And start writing it out.
Write it out what's upsetting you, what.
Happened, and just keep writing that out.
And find someone that you can share with. If you don't feel comfortable addressing it.
With the person, and try to see it from a different perspective, and there's.
A good chance that you'll be able to resolve it, act differently towards the.
Situation than if you would not have.
Put pen to paper. Not saying it's going to work every time, but a lot of times talking to someone and writing it out is.
Going to help surface something that you.
Just couldn't figure out or didn't come to yourself when you were just ruminating in your head about it. Avoiding conversations that are hard and not.
Addressing conflict is the worst thing that.
You could possibly do, not only to.
Yourself, but to the team and to the company.
And a lot of times people's excuse they feel is really good because it's not a big deal, but if it.
Bothers you, it's a big deal.
Period.
It's only hurting you anyways.
So I can't tell you how many times people address conflict and then they kick themselves in the butt for letting it go so long.
Or they always come back and say.
It was never as bad as they thought it was.
Or I've seen people become close friends.
Because they decided address the conflict that.
You know was kind of wedged between them and kept them not so close.
So think about who in your life you've got conflict with, and think about what you've been avoiding. Start by writing it out. Talk to a truth teller, and then either decide to take action or not. But know that there's a consequence for not doing anything if it does bother you.
