Leadership Therapy: The Key To "Manifesting"

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We post questions and I am hand selecting some of those questions and answering them. Also people in the community answer them, which is, which is really fun today. The question that I'm going to answer comes from a few people and I. It's about manifesting basically. But we got a Tim here says how to effortlessly maintain the status quo by mastering manifestation of intention. I'm not going to address the status quo part of that question. We'll just let that slide. We'll pretend that that isn't there. And then Bill says how to be more patient with the process and to strike the balance between manifesting my reality and trusting it will all play out the way that it is meant to.

So like kind of to, to summarize is like.

How do you, how do we manifest an outcome? Right? And so when I think about that, I think about the documentary, the secret or vision boards that that sort of thing is manifesting like, you know, how do we will it into existence basically? And I, I kind of have two points about that I think that are.

Probably counterintuitive to what most leadership training or most people out there online would say like the self help industry.

Because I find that, I find that that's very ineffective in a way. So.

Number one, when we're talking about manifesting.

Most of the time the cause of somebody not achieving a desired outcome has way more to do with fear of success than anything else. Like so you know, we're coming up with a goal that we want to achieve and it sounds really cool and you know, we deserve to do more and we're going to do better. And so we're going to visualize this thing into existence.

Most of the time the reason why we even need to do all that jumping jacks or whatever.

Is because we don't believe subconsciously that we are worthy of that thing or that we can't achieve that thing. And so then what happens is we procrastinate, we sabotage it. We do all kinds of things that keep us from achieving that goal. I will tell you guys that of all the people that I know that are really, really successful, they don't manifest something into existence, they design something into existence as A leader, you're a designer. You're designing an outcome. It's not optional. Which brings me to my second point, which is the. That the idea of manifesting something and then.

You know, it being our destiny or letting things naturally take their course, that they're meant to be, is, is the most external locus of control thing that you can do to yourself. Because what we're saying is we're, we're going to think about it and visualize it into existence, which is like, okay, well, fate is going to take over or destiny is going to take over. And you know, really what is, what is happening is we're trying to convince ourselves that it should be true. But that's external destiny and fate is an external thing that we can't control.

We can control how we design something, the effort we put into it, how good we are at executing, how good we are at recruiting the right people to help us on our mission, our ability to work hard and learn those things are inside of our control. And so I would say that instead of manifesting something into existence, take that, wad it up and throw it away, let's design something into existence. You know, when you think about this too, is the thing that gets in people's way is their expectation of things, right? So when we have a fear of success, most of the time we will put ourselves in a situation where we're leaving it to chance or fate. And then there's an. There's an expectation there that it should be easy or it should be obtainable or that we deserve it. Right? That's an expectation that comes along with manifesting. You don't deserve anything, you're not entitled to anything. Like, you achieve something or you don't, it's not going to be easy, it's going to be hard. And most things in life that are worthwhile, that you accomplish, that are something that you should be really, really proud of. Like you're doing something that nobody else has done or that is, you know, really, really hard to achieve, the world will challenge you, challenge you in ways that you won't even expect. And if you're not designing the outcome and committed to the outcome in a way that defies fate and destiny, it's a flip of a coin like that. You're going to get lucky and then it's going to happen. And so, you know, the real strategic way to manifest things is completely different.

The way that the people that are most successful think about this sort of stuff, and the way that I have learned to do it is I replay situations in my head, searching for the worst outcomes and how will I react to them when they come, when way before it happens. And that's not manifesting, that's mentally preparing myself for when I do this, you know, this thing. What could go wrong? Okay, well, what am I going to do when this goes wrong? What am I going to do when that goes wrong? And so I'm. I'm role playing those situations over and over and over again. I also will role play situations where I'm in meetings with people that I would like to be in meetings with. So let's just say for, for an abstract example, I want to be in a meeting with the President of the United States. I will role play how that interaction will go over and over again.

So when that opportunity arises, which will be by design, not by chance or fate, it will, it will most likely come from something that I designed.

That situation will feel natural, and I will be able to convey the story.

Or function in a way that is unaffected by the gravity of the moment. There's a couple examples of that, I think, that come to mind.

I've told this story before, but I remember this one time when I was younger, I used to gamble a lot in Vegas. And I had a system like, that was pretty lucrative for me. Like, I, I did pretty good for a time. I was playing roulette and I was down, and I, I kind of had a system for the money part where I would walk away when I was up, but. But I also would only go down so far. And then I, I would, I would quit and I was down for the weekend. Like, let's say I started on Friday. I was down Friday, I was down Saturday, and now it's Sunday. And I was like, well, I'm just gonna, I'm gonna go to another casino. I'd been to a few casinos and it, it wasn't going well, but I was way down. And I remember I went to the Palms. I ended up at the Palms. And this was kind of when the Palms was newer.

And I was playing roulette and I, I bet heavy on 17. I think at the time. Palm. The Palms had a, a weird thing where you could bet 200 bucks straight up on a number. And if you're not familiar with roulette, most of the casinos cap how much you can bet on a number straight up to a hundred bucks. That's kind of changed over time, but at this time, it was rare that somebody would let you bet more than a hundred. So it was 200 and so then that pays 35 or 36 to 1, something like that. So if that number hits, you're gonna win like, you know, 7,000 something dollars. Well, I had $200 straight up on the number and it hit three times in a row. So 17 hit three times in a row. People around me are freaking out and they're, you know, they're like, holy cow, you're so lucky. I wish I. What are you doing? How can I be lucky? Or whatever. They have absolutely no idea that I'm down for the weekend. They have no idea. I just walk in and I won pretty quickly. I hadn't been there that long. I win, there's a crowd that comes around. There's like this energy when you start to win big like that, where people are paying attention to you and nobody asks or is aware of the fact that I was down like the barely got me to even in that sequence of, of events. And so most people kind of just react in the moment. I remember just kind of having this experience where people are freaking out and, and they would ask me like, why aren't you excited? And I was like, well, you know, like I kind of. One, I expected that my thing would turn and I would win eventually in my system that I was doing. But two, I'm not up. Like, I'm not. And also like, it's not going to change. It doesn't change my life.

I wasn't gambling to change my lifestyle or you know, my, I wasn't not going to be able to make my mortgage payment. I was playing a game in a system that, that I was interested in. That was it like. But I had, I had won and role played winning. You know, many times I'm not, I'm not affected by it. And that, that happens a lot to me where I'm in situations where people are like, why aren't you more excited? Why? You know, and it's like, well, because I expected this. I've already played this through in my mind, like how this is going to go. I designed this. This is by design. Like I'm sitting here with the President because I designed this outcome and I did all this work and a bunch of stuff went wrong and it almost didn't happen. And, and then I doubled down and then I doubled down again. And then when everybody else quit, I kept going and now I'm here. And you're like, why, why am I not surprised? And jumping up and down on a trampoline. Like I'm a little kid excited that we get to have Ice cream. Like, it doesn't, it doesn't register with me. It was designed and I also, in this design, practiced that I wouldn't get a affected by the moment. So I could do the thing that I designed this to do for the outcome that I'm trying to create. And so, you know, that's all based on expectations. Like, you can't expect it to be easy and you can't expect to get lucky. And when it's harder than it is, you should expect that too. Like it's going to be harder. It's not easy. There's a lot of stuff you got to do to be successful. And you know when you ask really successful people like, oh, how, how did, how did you do that? Or. And the first thing that happens is they go to iHome. They go. And there's like a million things flashing through their mind at the time. Like, it wasn't one thing. It wasn't because I put a picture up and stared at it every day. It's not it. Like, you design an outcome, you don't manifest an outcome.

Now.

One thing that should be considered as the recipe to that is that a positive outlook and a belief that things can happen and things can be better and that they are possible is the fuel for any system that you're going to design. Like, you have to believe that right around the corner it's going to turn around or you're going to figure it out. You have to believe that it's possible and have a positive lens on things, a realistic positive lens on things. But that's not manifesting. That's just a context. It's your context in how you approach things. So manifesting is, is not a thing. Designing an outcome is a thing.

Thanks for the question. Let me know in the comments what you think and.

I'd encourage anybody else who has a fun question to post it there in the, in the thread in the Syndicate X library app and I'll talk to you real soon.