In this group coaching segment, Chris Prefontaine guides participants Hito and Rusty through the process of articulating a powerful personal "why" statement. Hito shares an extensive draft that mixes surface desires (wealth, travel, material comforts) with deeper motivations (freedom, love, impact, and being a catalyst for change). Chris highlights the need to shift from vague "wants" to present‑tense, emotionally charged affirmations, urging Hito to define each element (e.g., what "money working for me" truly means) and explore the feelings and ripple effects on loved ones. The conversation also covers the distinction between fear‑driven versus gain‑driven motivations, the importance of daily visualization and reading the statement in a felt state, and practical steps for refining the why: (1) define the concrete outcome, (2) ask why it matters, (3) articulate the emotional impact on self and others, and (4) repeat the statement in present tense. Chris advises focusing on a single resonant mentor or author (e.g., Bob Proctor, Tony Robbins) rather than chasing many, and suggests creating a prioritized list of people to connect with, leveraging the community’s network to bridge the 2‑5‑degree connections to those mentors. Rusty shares his own experience of using Chris’s mentor list to connect with influential figures, illustrating the tangible benefit of the networking strategy. Throughout, the tone remains supportive, instructional, and enthusiastic, with Chris providing real‑time feedback, prompting deeper introspection, and encouraging actionable next steps.
Chapters
Write their names down that you'd like to learn from them, and then let's start getting the connections for you. You're only two, three, four, five connections away from the people that that you want to meet highly likely. Hito, what you got? Let's read it.
Ah, shit.
Yeah, first of all, you know, as you just said that to to David here. I tried to keep all the negative things as much out of it as I could because I try not to, you know, be that negative guy. I don't want to be that. That's where I came from. That's what I was. And so I tried to keep that out of the whys, but of course that is a big motivator behind the why because you don't want to be that anymore. Um, I don't disagree with that.
Some people, some people are driven more by the fear of that than The gain over here, whatever, whatever's gonna feed you. Um, I don't want to be part of the how and get stuck, so I'll listen to it. But, but don't think that that's a bad thing if that's what you want to stay away from. You're running towards or away.
I know, I totally agree. And the how for me is not really, you know, it'll come. It's just, um, what book am I just reading? Um, I think it was actually, um, what's, what's Zach's favorite author? Bob Proctor.
Yeah.
And he had something in there saying, you know, if you don't get stuck on the things that you don't want, because that is what you will attract in the long run if that is your, you know, main thing. And that's super conflicting for me because I, I do study this daily and I was like, uh, okay.
Okay. Where I was going, this, this is important. So where I was going was the emotion of I don't want that. So, so super important. You don't just keep stating. Yeah. Read what you got out and I'll stop you if I want to like say, okay, that's enough and I want to insert, right?
Okay, here goes nothing. Okay. I want to be in a position where I can choose what I do every day. I want to have enough money to buy more time. What I mean by this is I want to have my money working for me and so I don't have to.
Why?
Because I don't want to have to worry about the day-to-day struggles. I want to have Bella by my side and not have to see her go to work. Uh, weeks at a time for, you know, for a long time, uh, for little money. I want to be able to protect her and spend all the time in the world with her and the people that I love and inspired by. I want to travel and explore the world, uh, multiple months out of the year with Bella and the dogs and, uh, don't ever have to leave them if I don't want to. Uh, I want to consume the knowledge of the world and appreciate everything it has to offer. Uh, learn from the oldest, the widest— wisest, and the richest people there are. Enjoy the worldly foods everywhere and every day with those that I love and care about. I want to have multiple nice houses. I don't want to have to worry about paying for them. I want to have all the cars that I've always dreamed and fantasized about. I want to have a 60-foot sailing yacht that I can take out on the summer days. I want to, I want to live every day like it is my last. Nothing but positivity, love, and freedom. I want this because I was told by many people growing up that normal was already crazy enough and I probably wasn't going to be anything extraordinary. I always disagree with this. Normal was boring as it could be, and I wanted more. I wanted more than people out there and anywhere else. I didn't want to be told how to live my life and how the expectations to be part of society. I didn't want a 9 to 5 minimum wage or, you know, work myself up the corporate ladder. If I peel back the onion, At most, at the most surface level, I want to have immediate satisfaction like most people. I imagined spend time with the people I love and care about, do fun things together, buy nice things and have nice cars. But if I pull back the layers of the onion, I want to change. I want to be the change that I hope to see in the world. I want to help people. I want to be in a position where people admire and respect me to a degree where I can help them and teach them, guide them to a better future, coach people on how to live a better life. And make better decisions. Help people in need with the basic human needs: education, shelter, food, and transport. How to make better decisions in life and how to get better from from whatever place they're in. I want to leave the world behind knowing that I did more good than I will ever know, and I would and more love than I ever knew what to do with. This world is becoming more darker and stranger every day, and I hope that I can do something about this and make it better because most days I don't like what I see.
Okay, a lot there. Yeah, I took a bunch of notes if I can reread some of my notes, but just general comments. Hit a first of all, I didn't find it negative. I would maybe just that last statement try to massage, but I don't. I didn't find your statement negative in any shape, form, or fashion.
But I tried. That's I tried not doing that.
Worked at it.
Yeah, I worked at it. No, I did. That took me at least an hour and a half this morning.
So I, I, I think you sound excited saying it. Let me just give you some ideas how to go to the next level with it if I can, and Rusty chime in. You had a lot of want in there. This is just micro. You had a lot of want, so I would just change that to— because you're gonna read the statements. Like, Dave's not there yet, but you're gonna read this. Sounds like I would suggest daily. Let's, let's get rid of want and write it in present tense.
By doing that, how?
Yeah, I have. I choose to have. I'm enjoying. I'm like, I'm doing it. So that emotionally hit it. I told the last group, sometimes driving into the office, I'll do that. I'll get into that state of what I'm working on and it's, and all of a sudden it's the more I do it, the quicker I can do it.
Okay.
So when you read this over and over again, try to get in the state. You're not just reading it to read it. Just get in the state. Like I'm, I'm there right now. So you can feel what it feels like to be there.
That's, that's what I do at night. Most nights before I go to sleep, I kind of—
There's no better time. Yeah, there's no better time. It's awesome. Yeah.
Yeah.
Um, each one of your lines, so without me singling them out, like, you— because there's a lot of stuff to impact there. Um, I would do 2 things, same as we did, uh, on almost every single person's volunteered. Define it and then why. Sort of like Dave's, like, I want my money working. Well, what does that mean? Why is that important? What the heck does it mean to have it working? You know. Well, it'd be really cool if I had this, this, this, and this going. Sort of like the bucket thing like Dave alluded to. Okay, define that. And then why is that important? That'd be fun. What does it feel like? How does it make you feel when you say not worry day to day? Like, get in that state. I'll feel like this. It'll affect Bella because of this.
Yeah.
I mean, I know the answers, but it's good to have this as feedback.
Well, you have a cool— like, that's a cool statement. You could really put meat in this now. This would be good. Am I correct in tracking with you? It sounds like a really— one of the really big ones in here, shorter term, is to have Bella home, not working.
So not working is not a priority as long as she's not away.
Okay, so different work or whatever, right?
Yeah.
Okay, so then define that. What's that going to take? A big driving force, because I know when I met him here and it came out today in the call, of Rick's— Rick Morato— is to get his wife done work. And he's emotional about it, and you know it when you talk to him and how he writes it. So whatever that means for you and Bella, define it. And then why is that important? And then remember the questions I just gave you guys: how will it make me feel? Who else will it affect? How will it make them feel?
Okay, so I got the how would it affect others and how would it make them feel. What did I miss here?
How it affect those, um, how, how it make you feel, then how it affect others and how it make them feel. And then when you've done that, then it's that second level of, okay, well, why is that important? Who gives a shit?
Yeah, okay. Yeah, I took, I took some notes here. I'll definitely work on that. And then I'm also doing the 31-day money makeover. So like a lot of this is entangled with each other, right? Like how much time you make yearly and how much do you want to make this and that. So, um, this is something that I'm actively working on. Like in my head, it's just as I just mentioned, you know, Bob Proctor, Napoleon Hill. It's just some of the stuff is like you don't know when, when in your head you're conflicting, you know. Am I being Too focused on not thinking negative that therefore I am thinking negative. Is this too much? Am I like dude? It's like I know this is kind of how it goes. I know I'm I'm getting I'm getting fruit. I'm already right. I'm already getting the fruits from the seeds that I planted months ago, but yet you know like it's it's it's I know everybody struggles with this. I'm sure that you and and Rusty and and you know everybody struggles with that until they reach that point where they know. It's paid off, but it's, it's, that's the biggest thing because there's, there's no framework. There's not like, this is how it should be. Your systems and your, um, what is systems and, um, mindset, skillset. So those you can measure.
Let me interject this then too, cuz I know you're an avid, I know from your nightly text reading and you, you're, you're a sponge for that stuff, which is super good. What has worked for me, and I'm just suggesting it in some fashion, you guys can massage this, is once, like, whoever it is, if it's Bob Proctor and Tony Robbins, whoever it is, there's someone in something that they do that resonates a little bit more. Like it strikes a different chord with you, all of us. So when you feel that, whenever that is, I chase that instead of keep chasing everyone for mentors, right? I just chase that. I go down that rabbit hole. And then that book might lead to another book and that book, but it's within the same rabbit hole instead of trying to— because they— everybody has a little bit different twist and you're going to resonate better with someone else than, you know, than I would or Nick would. Doesn't matter.
Yeah.
No wrong answer. Just follow what your energy, like your gut knows better. Um, you did say, speaking of that, about learning from others. I think you said around the world of what— learning from others. Yeah. If I were you, I would make a list You could go on our podcast and make a list. You could go online and make a list, but make a list of your top— you can call it your top 10, your top 20, whatever gets you going, right? Steve West used to have like top 100, I think it was. But come up with a top whatever for you, write their names down that you'd like to learn from them, and then let's start getting the connections for you. You're only 2, 3, 4, 5 connections away from the people that you want to meet, highly likely.
Yeah.
And they'll change your world. So that— I picked up on that one towards the end just because I know you love that stuff. Write it down.
I did that when I was considering leaving teaching, right? Chris gave me a bunch of names and I had conversations with Peter Taunton, you know, his brother. So there's, you know, there's about 4 or 5 that I had connected with that really kind of shifted my mind. Yep.
Yep.
That's what one of the strengths of the community, guys, is somewhere in the community, Nick or myself or Zach or somebody knows someone that knows someone that's close to where you want to be. So let's, let's work on that together. That'd be fun.
Yeah.
And then let's not lose track. There's a lot, there's a lot of really cool goals in there. So let's not lose track of the— you had the higher level stuff in there. That's really cool.
You want to be on my sailing yacht, don't you, Chris?
Well, if you invite me, I'd be there.
Yeah.
Yep. Um, really cool. Good stuff, you guys. Were there some nuggets in those 2 whys these guys were nice enough and volunteered enough to share? Great job, you guys. That's not easy. Yeah, good work. That's good stuff that went into that.
