644 -Letting Go of Who You Were to Step Into Who You're Becoming

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Let's go. Welcome back to the podcast. I want to start off today's podcast with giving a little bit of an update. There's been so much going on behind the scenes and I feel like I my last few podcasts have very much been about giving you so much value and sharing with you all the next steps to get to six figures to hit 10k months. And, and so I thought I would just start this episode with a little bit of an update on my book on events, on fun things happening. So I feel like it has been an absolute pressure cooker the last month. I can't believe we're in March. Like I think this happens every single year because February is such a short month and February is always so busy. There's always so many people launching stuff like I was launching unstoppable sales. There was so much going on and I'm behind the scenes working on my book, serving my clients, working with incredible ladies and gentlemen, and then also working on a Secret Squirrel event as well. And I want to share with you like the absolute transparent truth of the challenges that have come along the way in the last month. So with all of this happening, obviously learning to navigate your own boundaries and taking care of yourself through the process of launching and then, you know, trying to give your all in multiple different areas is really difficult, really difficult. And I'm sure that if you're listening to this, you're probably experiencing this as well yourself. And, and whether you're in a season of being pulled in different directions or whether you're in a quieter season, I'm sure some of this will resonate with you. So I've been working on an incredible event that I'm bringing to Brisbane in 2025 and I have been working on finding the most incredible speakers. I have been working on thinking about this in a really unique way. So it's so different to anything else that you've seen here in Australia. I've learned so much by traveling to America to be a part of other events. And I've been a part of so many events over the years that I feel like there is something different that I can really bring to this space. And so I want it to be the biggest event that I've ever done. And with that comes challenges and comes mindset blocks and up levels and uncomfortable feelings and emotions and all of that that goes with it as well as with my book. So bringing that to life. Like, I have been working behind the scenes to get the book cover right and to get the. The format is working on it at the moment, getting the graphics right for the book. Like, there's so much that goes into a book. And I was saying to my sister the other day, like, you know, when you see people do their, like, their box arrives at their printed books and they get the book out and they're like, oh, my God, I can't believe how I feel. And they're like, overwhelmed with emotion. Previously in the past, I've looked at that and gone, like, I see why you're doing it. It's a good post to share. Like, it's a great celebration. I'm celebrating them on the incredible, you know, task of putting a book together. But I've always thought about, like, when I do that, I don't think I want to do that type of post. But now when I look at them, I'm like, I get it. I get that they're overwhelmed with emotion because it takes so much to bring a project like this to life and to do it in a way that you are so happy with and you're putting your words onto paper that is always going to exist out of the world. Like, there are so many mindset blocks that have come along with this. And the funny part about it or the irony around it is that it is about imposter syndrome. This book. And I've experienced so many up levels with experiencing imposter syndrome again and again and again. Especially, like, literally talking about imposter syndrome and the brain and understanding the mindset of it and changing the concept of it in the world. Like, I have this real passion about changing Tall Copy syndrome in Australia. And I have this real passion about shifting the way that think people think about imposter syndrome because they think about it from a perspective of, oh, I have this thing, so I can't do the things that I want to do and I want to Change that for people, because that is not true. And so creating this book has been a labor of love, yes. But it has also been this nervous system shifting that causes me to feel so uncomfortable and not ready. And who the hell do I think I am? And I can't believe this is coming out. And what are people going to think? And are people even going to read it? Is anyone even going to buy it? Like, I'm having all of the feels. And so when I think about now, the way I used to look at those videos of people sharing and unboxing their books, I'm like, full. And I can't wait for that to happen. But also, I know I'm also going to be overwhelmed with emotion because it takes so much to bring it to life. And it is this piece of you and it is like your legacy in a way. Like I'm. I will be a published author and that will be out in the world and that's what I'll be known for. Like, it's really overwhelming, really overwhelming. And so then the same kind of challenges have come along with the event. Well, not the same. And others. So I had planned out, I've been working on this event for the past probably three or four months. And I made the decision back in, I think it was like November when I attended the last one. I was like, I know I want to put on a big. And I turned to one in America in November. I was like, I know I really want to put on a big event in Australia. And I have always felt this way. After running the love what you do collective events, having like a two and a half hour, three hour evening event once a month was a lot of work to put on. It was a lot to market, it was a lot to create, a lot to find the speakers, a lot to nail the event. So it was an experience that people wanted to attend again. And it also felt like I wasn't able to really fully give it everything that I really wanted to give it because I had marketed it as a networking event and that's not what I really wanted to achieve. I wanted to shift people. I wanted to inspire people and motivate people. And even though that was the feedback that I would get from people, to me, I was like, I want to do it on a bigger level. And so that's what this new event will be. And I had actually planned to have it in May and I had reached out to speakers that right at the beginning of the year confirmed amazing speakers. And then things didn't go to plan. And so I still don't have the graphics for the event. I haven't created the sales page. I have secured the venue, but nothing else. Because January in February are such short months that there was so much going on that I was needing to work on and I didn't realize how much the book would take me away from working on the event. Plus also obviously all my clients that I'm serving and then launching Unstoppable sales again, like, it takes a lot of attention. And so the event kind of like took a sidestep and I know now that I need a team member to help me with this because it is a massive undertaking. Plus there's a massive investment with this, like to put on an event the scale that I want to put it on at. It's a good 50k investment. It's massive. And so that then comes with a lot of fear, a lot of doubt of like a tickets even going to sell. What price point do I even put it at? Like all the things. And so I've been navigating all this behind the scenes and actually made the difficult decision last week that I'm actually going to push the event date out because I don't feel like I'm going to give it its best opportunity for it to fill the room with incredible people if I try to rush it because I'm also going to launch my book. So it's a lot in the next month or so and so I really need to get clear on. I'm really. I'm sorry, I'm mapping out the next timeline because I'm most likely going to push it back to August and I'm just waiting for the confirmation from the event space that I can do that and then I will come back to you with more details. And I'm so excited for this because it's going to be so different to a conference. We're not going to be just sitting down learning. Yes, it's going to be incredible speaking speakers that you will learn from. But I want you to walk away from that event feeling changed and shifted. And I also want you to walk away with new connections, an up level in your network and and to be able to really think about your business in a really different way because it's about you stepping in and becoming unstoppable. And so I will share more with you once I have more about it and once everything's ready to go because we'll start doing early bird tickets and I'll share all the details. But my God, it's Been quite a challenge behind the scenes. And February is a really funny month. Like, I don't know what it was about February. It was just, I don't know, I feel like I was always chasing my tail and there was always more things to be done. And now I'm getting to the end of the month and I'm like, my gosh, did I really execute in the way that I wanted to execute? And I am now revisiting so many things to be like, okay, now that I've taken the pressure off myself to not have the event ready for May and push it back to August, now I feel like I've got breathing room to really make it epic. Like so epic. And so now it's. Now I'm going to refocus my attention on the book to get it out and give it the attention that it really needs so then I can make a splash with it. And that comes with also now questions around, okay, so what do I do book launch wise? Because I really was actually hoping this big event to be something where I share the book. The event is not going to be about the book, but it was a kind of like nice extra little thing that I can feed into the event. Whereas now I'm thinking I'll actually do a book launch party in Brisbane and in Melbourne and in where I grew up in the, in Gippsland. So, so much still to come. I'm navigating all of this behind the scenes and wanted to share it with you because sometimes, like, there's so much that we're working on behind the scenes that we don't talk about and sometimes it's because I'm protecting my idea. Right. And so that's, I think sometimes really important because especially with my book, especially with the event, like, I don't want to come out too soon and share about it. I don't want it to be misconstrued of what I'm trying to achieve with the book. Like, there's so many things that go with it. So sometimes there is a position where I'm like, no, I'm not going to talk about this because I don't want to open myself up to other people's opinions. I really want to solidify my idea first and make sure that I'm working on it in a way that feels really good for me and that I'm proud of before I then go and open myself up to other people's opinions because that can really influence you. And so you've got to be conscious of that. I think when you're navigating some of these things behind the scenes. Okay. And so that then brings me to the topic for this podcast, which I hope you resonate with letting go of who you were, to step into who you're becoming. This is almost like a baptism of fire or another way that I've heard one of my friends talk about it is it's like the journey of a butterfly. So you almost, like, have to go through a death before you then go through the rebirth. Right. So when a cancer caterpillar is transitioning, goes into a cocoon, it turns into mush and technically dies and then actually becomes and grows into a butterfly. And then there is then still resistance. To get out of that cocoon, the butterfly has to use its wings to strengthen its own wings. And if it doesn't do this, then it doesn't actually strengthen its wings enough to be able to have the strength to fly. It pushes out of that cocoon. So there's so much resistance, and it feels like you're pushing up against everything in order to come out and then fly. And so I always love that analogy when it comes to this next evolution of who you're becoming. And. But not a lot of people talk about the challenges that go along with letting go of who you were. There is so much discomfort in that. And as much as you can say that you want these next level things, and much as you can talk about all the things that you're doing and you put yourself in situations to challenge yourself, the growth can sometimes be enjoyable. And it can be exciting, and it can be so much happening, and it can be so much fun to be this confirmation of, like, yes, it's happening. But in the same process, you've got to hold both energies of the good and the discomfort and the discomfort of letting go of stuff that no longer serves you. And that can be really hard. It can be really hard. And so I feel like I've been going through this over the last couple of months, and it's been coming to this culmination of experiences where I'm like, oh, this is another thing that I need to let go of. And this whole. And this shows up in so many different ways. Can I just say, like, it can show up in your conversations with people. It can show up in, like, your ideal client shifting. So I had a conversation with a client about this the other day, and she's been so comfortable and so focused on a specific ideal client in her business, but she's identified that there's another ideal client that she really wants to work with that is further along than that existing ideal client in their journey. And she's like, I really want to work with this growth focused, next level person. And I was like, amazing. So we need to focus everything on her. And the look of discomfort on her face was like, oh God, what is that going to mean? And what is, am I going, what if it fails or what if it doesn't work? And is that going to mean I'm going to have to change who I'm showing up as? And so it was like this identification of like, she realized that yes, she needs to go over here, but the comfort of what's worked for her in the past was something she needed to let go of. And so it can show up in, yeah, ideal clients. It can show up in your friend circles, it can show up in behaviors in your business. It can show up in the way that you show up on social media, it can show up in business practices on everyday level. Like, there's so many things. Like sometimes you, like, look at it and you're like, oh, this is what I used to do and it worked. And then you have a force to pivot. And sometimes it can be that resistance in between that discomfort that feels like you almost have a choice of like, I can go back to what this was and I can go back to that and be stuck here because it's actually not working for me anymore. But we feel confident, we feel confident and comfortable there. And so it's almost like, oh, I've got to stop holding on to this thing. I've got to detach from it and let it go. And that can feel really hard. Especially if you have a fear around loss and you've had loss in the past and that feels really hard. And the same thing with like friendship groups or certain people in your life that you're like, they did serve me at some point and they've added value to me in my life for so long. And that's amazing. And, and they still can in some way. But there's other times where you've got to protect yourself because it's like where you are going, where you want to go, you can't hold on to this stuff anymore. And it can even be in mindsets. Like you can literally have belief systems and you can have identity markers that who you believed you were, that worked for you, that gave you and fulfilled you, fulfilled your needs in some way that you're like, oh, I'm recognizing that that's also no longer serving me. And if I stay here, that's also going to become painful. And so this discomfort space is almost like that messy middle. And it feels. You'll have moments of like, this is really good. And this is amazing, exciting. And then it's like, this is fucking shit. This is so shit. And it's so uncomfortable and I wish it was different. And you push up against this frustration of like, fuck, why does it have to be so hard? And why does it have to be this way? And why isn't this working for me anymore? Like, it's almost like you go into denial and feel like, far out. Like, I just want it to be easy. And so I had a conversation with someone the other day and we spoke about this thing of like, where are we making it harder for ourselves? And it's this piece of holding on to the past version of ourselves, holding on to this past stuff and. Or behaviors or some type of peace that was keeping us small week or friendship or clients or whatever it might be. It's like if I keep holding onto this, and sometimes it can even be products that you've got. It could be part of your product suite, your service offering, it could be specific offers that you have. Like, and you're like, you know that deep down you actually have to let that go. But it feels so hard because you're like, but that worked for me. It was working for me. It was really good. And maybe it gave me heaps of income and why isn't it working for me now? And so that feels really. And almost like, usually look at it, you're like, I put so much time and energy and effort into that and it was working, but now it's not working. And I feel like if I've let it go, like, did I really give it everything it had? Like, so as we sit in this messy middle, I think there's elements here where the choice has to come back to which direction do you want to focus on? Which direction do you want to keep facing? Because it's literally like you're in the car and you're driving one way, but all you can do is look in the rear vision mirror. Are you looking in the rear vision mirror and wishing it was back there and things were easier and back then it was all good. That's not where your expansion is. If you want to step into the person you're becoming, the more that you can focus on where you're going, the more that you can focus on what's going to serve you. And one of the best things I can do for myself. And that you can do for yourself is paint a bigger picture for what that vision would look like for you in two years, three years, five years time. Because if you keep coming back to that of where you're going, the pain of letting go of the stuff in the past won't be as painful. It's only the resistance, that messy middle piece where you've got, you're holding on like with, you know, white knuckles, trying to hold on to this stuff from the past and the universe is like pushing you in another direction and you're like, I don't want to go, I don't want to go. And that is the resistance. That's where the pain is caused by. And so we need to refocus and come back to. But where, who, who am I becoming and where do I really want to go and will that serve me? Is that something that I really want to live into? And if it is, then it's okay to let go of the past stuff and so can let go of that friendship. It's okay to let go of that product offering. It's okay to let go of that way you used to do things in business because it's as you're stepping into that future self, she will have everything you need. You've got to trust that everything will work out for you and you've got to trust that you are being supported every step of the way. So I've been doing some real identity shifting work lately on this specifically because I'm reworking some of the things for my next level mastermind and focusing this attention on core elements that help you step into your next level of who you're becoming. So it's like next level identity work, right? And so I've been then practicing certain things to, to bring into this next round of the mastermind. And as I go through this, it's. So one of the tools I've been using is like these identity shifting belief systems in an audio where I'm the one talking about this next level version of myself and who I'm becoming. And there's elements there where it feels unfamiliar and it feels like, well, that's not true just yet, and that's okay. But in the consistency of listening to it and stepping into it and visualizing it and embodying that feeling and being that person, I feel so many things shifting, but I'm not there yet. And so this is uncomfortable, messy middle and I'm still taking the action in the face of it. I feel like I need to say that because One of the things that I think that we can get caught up in is we go internal and we do all try to do all that internal work, but then the business starts to be impacted. And so I want you to know, like, in this process, I am making the decisions of my future self in fear, in discomfort. So like booking the venue for this big event and talking to them about the numbers that I want to have in this room feels so uncomfortable and so unsure and uncertain. But I'm like, still do it, still do it. Still put the money down, right? Show up, show up and do the thing. And so that is really just discomforting. That is really uncomfortable. And it's having the uncomfortable conversations, it's facing the fear, it's challenging yourself to be like, okay, but I don't really want to show up on social media today. But that's not what you decided you were going to do. You're going to do that. And I didn't want to really do this Instagram live today, but I'm showing up and I'm doing it anyway and paying attention to like where the resistance is. Is the resistance because it's actually not the right path, or is the resistance because you aren't ready and willing to step into that next level version of yourself you want to become? And so this messy middle piece is uncomfortable and it feels like you want to burn things down and it feels like you just want to give up. And it feels like you just be like, oh, what if I just stopped? What if I didn't do any of this? What if I just went back to having some one to one clients and just keep staying there where it feels really comfortable? And I was like, no, that's not exactly where you want to go. And so it's natural for you to also have those doubt thoughts and it's natural for you to also have those fears and those that uncomfortable feeling of like wanting to go back to it, but recognizing it's in those moments of reframing of that and going, you know what, like, you've been there. Were you actually really happy there? And if you went back, I don't think you'd be happy with the fact that you went back to that, right? So sometimes you've got to coach yourself through that to be like, no, even though it sounds like it's easier, it's actually not really what you want. And through the growth, even though the growth feels really hard, it's actually what's going to fulfill you the most. Because when you come out the other side you'll be like, holy hell. I'm so glad I stayed the course. So I hope this episode has given you an insight into not only what's happening in my world, but also what goes on internally. That the highs and lows and the ups and downs of business is so normal. And whatever you're going through is so normal. It's just about how you choose to where you choose to focus your attention because you can choose to focus on the past, like I said, holding on that resistance and white knuckling it, or you can refocus your attention on the future and be like, where am I going and how do I want to feel and what do I want to do today and who do I want to show up as? Because the only way that you're going to step into becoming the version of yourself you're really proud of and who you really want to be is to let go of the old. All right, lovely. I hope you have an incredible rest of your week and I look forward to chatting with you soon. Thank you for listening.

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