In this 5‑minute motivational episode, the host addresses the common inner voice that questions whether one is being “too much” when setting expectations or boundaries in business. She shares a client’s dilemma about emailing a request and fearing judgment, then affirms that the client is not being excessive but is upholding high standards that deserve clear communication. The host links this self‑doubt to gendered conditioning that tells women to be seen but not heard, and she challenges that narrative. By separating emotion from facts, she demonstrates how to validate one’s standards objectively. She explains that strong emotional reactions often highlight either a core value, a crossed boundary, or a personal standard that must be defended. A second client example shows how a past trigger can be reframed into a growth opportunity by recognizing the boundary and communicating it differently. The episode concludes with actionable advice: identify the emotional trigger, understand what value or boundary it signals, and communicate the standard confidently, refusing to let others’ judgments silence you.
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Welcome to 5 Minutes of Momentum. These episodes are a short 5-minute burst of inspiration, motivation, and massive action. If you need that little kick up the butt to get things moving and to inspire you to take massive action, then every single Thursday I'll be sending you through a 5-minute episode to download, digest, and implement to finish your week off strong. Are you ready to get started? Let's go. Have you ever had that inner little voice say to you, "Ooh, can I say that? Can I ask that?" Is this being a bit too much? Am I being too much requiring that? Or is that going to make people judge me for being a little bit too precious or a little bit too much with regards to the expectations that I'm setting? If that is you, then this episode is definitely for you. I recently had a client have this experience and shared with me that she was like setting a boundary with something that had happened within her business and she needed to communicate to someone else. It wasn't a client, but to someone else, a specific expectation that she previously hadn't said out loud. And so I'm always a big believer of like, if you haven't communicated the boundary out loud, then you cannot expect someone to follow through on it, right? And so she had this experience and she said to me, this is what I want to email them. Is that okay? Am I being too much? And I said to her, actually, she said to me, I've just acknowledged that I even said that to myself. Am I being too much? She's like, but I just want to know, like, am I in my rights? Am I okay to, to ask this? And when we actually digested this a little bit more and we explored where the thought process was coming from, we explored what she was expecting, we, we explored how she wanted to handle the situation. This is what I said to her: you are not too much, you are not expecting too much, you have high standards, and it's important that you communicate those standards, otherwise they will not be upheld. What she had created and what— how this is going to impact what she had created was so worthwhile protecting. And this is so incredibly important when you think about what you've created with regards to an offering that you have, an event that you have, a stage that you have, a platform form, when it comes to a podcast that you're on, like whatever it is that you've created, if you have high standards around it and you are telling yourself that maybe I'm a bit too much by communicating these standards, I want you to acknowledge that a man would never think that. I'm just saying it out loud, like a man would never think that. That is our conditioning as being a good little girl. Don't ruffle feathers. You should be seen and not heard. You should be spoken to and not spoke— allowed to be spoken. You know, let her express yourself the way that you want to express yourself. Like you're being too dramatic, too overly emotional. That's a crock of shit. Your business is an emotional piece. Like, you have to be emotional in your business. You are going to make decisions from emotions, and you are not being too much. And so when we looked at the facts, so I said to her, like, even if we look at the facts, like, let's take out the emotion from it and we just look at the facts. You are not being too much at all. And it was such a beautiful, honest, realist— like, realistic conversation that we were literally working through changing some of that conditioning and programming in the conversation. Because when she realized that, she was like, oh, of course, like, a man wouldn't think that or say that. They would just basically say, like, this is not okay, this is what I expect from you, and let's work on a solution to come to the right place, right? So sometimes we have to recognize, like, am I being overly emotional, or is it— am I overly emotional because this is important to me, right? If something is important to you, then than it is doing honestly two things. One, it's highlighting your values, right? So you've got core values that are really important to you, most likely have business values that are really important to you, and it's pushing on the boundaries of those values. And so maybe someone else is doing something that's completely out of alignment with those values, or you are being forced to or asked to do something outside of those, out of the alignment with those values, right? So it's highlighting a value that's important to you. And so you need to be triggered by that emotionally because it's important to you, and you need to be aware of like, hey, I need to say something or do something about this, right? Secondly, it could be highlighting a boundary that has been crossed that you're not okay with, right? The way that you're being treated, or the way that you've been spoken to, or the way that something is, is turning out that you're actually not okay with, right? That sometimes does also highlight, highlight a deeper value. But just in first and foremost, like on surface level, sometimes it's actually because you either haven't communicated that boundary, and so they don't know how to treat you in relation to that boundary, and it's time now. Like, sometimes we have those experiences to be like, hey, like, this is actually grinding on my gears or annoying me or frustrating me, because it's important to you and you have a boundary that's been crossed, right? So this happened actually with a— actually with a different client of mine. This actually happened, and she had been emotionally triggered by a situation because it was a replication almost of a past experience that she had. And so it activated her, and she was like— she was overly emotional about it, and she was like, I want to be able to communicate this differently, but I also want to respond differently to how I have in past because this similar experience happened in the past and I don't want to respond in the same way. I want to grow from this. And so she was able to then see that as a shifting opportunity to be able to behave in a different way. And so we were able to again look at the facts, understand that a boundary had been crossed, and she— it was up to her to actually communicate that boundary because she had not communicated in the past. And so before you go and judge yourself, before you go, oh, I'm being too much, I want you to stop and actually ask yourself Why am I emotional about this? What is it highlighting to me that maybe I need to be aware of? Because maybe it's a boundary, maybe it's a core value that is absolutely worth standing up for, or maybe it's a standard that you have for your business, an expectation of yourself and the way that you operate that is absolutely worth upholding, right? There's a reason why people come to you and work with you is because of those standards. So don't try to— don't push those standards aside because someone might judge you for being too much. All right, I hope you've loved this episode. Let me know what you take away from it. Send me a DM on Instagram. Otherwise, have an incredible rest of your week.
