A 20-year-old engineering student asks how to stay motivated without daily demoralizing setbacks. Panelists say joy isn't the same as happiness: it's deeper and sustained, built through relationships, listening, and belonging rather than wins like grades or money.
I personally am just a student, I'm a 20 year old student. I'm doing engineering and I came in to study, I guess as with the idea that I want to build products that have an impact on people, that change people's perspective of things and apps that help people on a day to day basis. I'm on the mindset of the university which is getting exams done, getting results done. So how do I stop myself from getting demoralized on a day to day basis while this change happens for the analysis of the future?
So I make the distinction between joy and happiness. Happiness comes when you win the game.
When you get an A in your exam. Happiness comes when your number comes up in the lottery and then it goes away. You know that feeling joy is something more.
The things that you will do children every day. But you love your children every day, right?
And I think we have this, we've created this unrealistic, unrealistic expectation that every.
Day at work has to be amazing.
Like every day of your relationship has.
To be amazing and every day in your friendship has to be amazing.
It's just not. It's an unfair standard to put on.
A human being and it's an unfair standard to put on an organization.
And sometimes it's us, sometimes the organization is trying so hard, but we have a narrative in our head that we can't let go of, that it's us.
That'S creating the unhappiness every day.
We make ourselves victims and everything you see, you'll find all the evidence. Or we can choose to change our narrative.
I have a friend who moved from.
A liberal city to a very conservative city in the United States and she was very worried and I said to her, it's the most wonderful opportunity in the world. She says, but I'm going to hate all these people. I said, or you can learn to listen, understand what their motivations are and understand what they care about. And I bet you'll discover that your values are the same as theirs. Some of it's narrative, some of it's perspective.
Don't seek happiness. The happiness will happen here and there. It's seek joy.
And that comes from relationships and belonging and cause.
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