Madeline Mann says writing your own recommendation letter is ethical only if the person named as recommender reads, edits, and approves it first. Otherwise it's inappropriate. She suggests offering to draft it or send bullet points, writing LinkedIn recommendations for others to learn the style, and making it easy for your referees by cutting their work.
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Hey everyone, this is Self Made Millennial. I'm Madeline Mann. Today we're tackling the topic of is it ethical to write your own reference or recommendation? You may need references for a program you're applying to, a job you're interviewing for, a product you created. You need reviews for your podcast. There's a million reasons why you could ask someone for a review or recommendation, but let's say they say yes and then ask you to write it for them. Is that okay? I'll give you my thoughts and then some, as well as some tips on how to have great recommend. This question comes to us from JT in Orlando. And while Justin Timberlake is an avid watcher of Self Made Millennial, this is a different legendary jt and he asks, is it ethical to write your own reference? And my thought is, yes, you can write your own reference. And let me tell you why. When you ask someone to write a reference for you, that is a big lift, especially if they're not naturally a writer. They want to do this for you because they do want to refer you and they believe in you, but they might not be able to find the words. And they also are daunted by the that they might not completely understand the program you're going for or your next job. So they feel like they don't know exactly what to focus on in the reference. So then they say, yes, go ahead and write it for me. I'll review it, edit it, and then I'll submit it as myself. This is the only way that it's ethical. If they have a chance to read it, review it, edit it, and then explicitly say, yes, you can put my name to this. Otherwise it's really sketchy. Never submit something with someone else's name on it if they have not completely approved it. In the end, everyone wins. You get the recommendation you need focused on the points that are most important, and they really do recommend you. So they're really happy to do this and at least get a help in whatever capacity they're able to. Here's a tip. Next time you ask someone to write a review or recommendation and they're not necessarily getting around to it, offer up the option that, hey, would you like me to write a draft? Or hey, would you like me to send you some bullet points of things you could potentially focus on and see if that helps them. Because they could just be having writer's block. Or an even better tip, pay it forward. Offer to Give recommendations on LinkedIn to other people and just ask them, hey, what are some bullet points of the top specialties that you want to be known for. I want to make sure I include those in my recommendation for you. In the end, it's all about helping others and having the courage to ask for their help. And then once you do, make sure you help them help you. Now, I'm asking you to help me by hitting a like on this video, as well as subscribing to this channel and maybe even leaving a comment saying something like, thank you for the tip. It helped. Or your dress looks like ketchup. Now I want French fries. See you next time. Wi Fi. High five.
