Simon Sinek recounts sleeping beside a flag-draped casket on a military transport plane in Afghanistan. When he broke down presenting at Scott Air Force Base, a four-star general commanded "Go on" instead of offering sympathy. He argues real kindness sometimes means pushing people forward, not just giving them space.
Chapters
I did some work with the US Air Force. I'll spare you the long story, but I went to Afghanistan with them, and I was there to witness them doing their missions, and it was an amazing experience. I was, you know, at Bagram Air Base, and something happened that none of us expected. Me and my two escorts, we flew home with a flag-draped casket on a big military transport plane. So I slept next to this casket for 9.5 hours. I didn't do much sleeping, but I lay next to it. And it was a profound experience that profoundly, you know, changed my life. It changed my perspective on the world. And the deal I made with the Air Force was they would send me into this war zone to observe, and I would come back and report what I saw. And so about a week after the event, I went to Scott Air Force Base in Illinois, and I stood on the stage with all of the generals and the colonels, and I was telling them about my experience and offering some ideas. And then I get to this point in the story. About coming home with this flag-draped casket, the emotion's still very raw. And what go— I go quiet, and what's going through my mind is, "Do I talk about this?" So first decision was, "Yes, I'll tell the story." And midway through the story, I get stuck. I start welling up, the emotions are overwhelming, and I can't go on. I can't move forwards. Now, if this had happened to me in the private sector, and it's happened, where I get emotional on the stage, invariably someone will say, "It's okay." Yeah. "Take your time. Take your time. We'll wait for you." Right? As if to say, "You over there." And I was standing on the stage unable to speak, and one voice, it was the commanding general, the four-star at the back of the room, he said, "Go on." as if to say, "Go on, we are with you, you are safe." I choke up talking about it now. And it was the act of courage when somebody was emotional to say, "Move forwards, not wait." And I think that there's an— we are— we so often think we're being kind by giving people space or saying, "It's okay," but we very rarely think it's a kind thing to say, Move forwards. Go. And I will— the underlying message being, and I will be with you.
