Join us as we talk the fun of Mediation with ADHD

I'm invited with Indie Out Loud. And today, we have ADHD Asian Girl with us as well. And we are super excited to have her with us. So tell us what you've been up to, because we've—

we talked to you in February, you were at our summit in February.

But what have you been up to since February?

Yeah, I taught my first cohort of meditation course. And actually, the second cohort is happening starting next Saturday. So if anybody is curious and wants to sign up, it's a donation-based 4-week introduction to mindfulness course, definitely designed for ADHD folks. And all the people who attended the first cohort were people with ADHD. So I really got to test out some of my strategies, and that was really fun. That was the big thing I've been working on. Yeah.

That's very, very cool. So Vaida and I have been doing a lot of things. We, uh, fully launched our one-on-one coaching around here at NDLA Loud and doing all kinds of things. And this year we also get to, as a team, we had one member of our team last year who was speaking at CHAD, but this year as a team, we're presenting an innovative program.

So we get to do that.

And Vaita, you're on a panel. What panel are you on again, Vaita?

I'm on the LGBTQIA panel.

And, uh, you're going to be on a panel as well.

Yes, I will be involved with the Asian roundtable, which is really exciting. Yes, Asian ADHD roundtable.

Yeah, so we get to— can I connect again at CHADD, which is in Anaheim, California this year? So we're all excited about that. But so we want to talk about ADHD and meditation and how meditation can be fun even with ADHD. Most of us Okay. So I will admit, I'm very much a, I look at meditation as this torturous thing to do. And I know a lot of our clients feel that way too. So tell us how ADHD and meditation actually can go together and work well together.

Yeah, I think it's probably very similar to any habit building and probably innovative habit building ideas. One thing I always like to tell people is start with where they're naturally, their mind and body is in one place. So for some people, it's in the shower. For some people, it's after they work out. For me, people like me, I'm like kneading a bread dough, and that's where I'm like body and mind in one place. So start with naturally where you already have that moment of you're in the present moment, you're aware of what you're doing, you're in your body, you're aware of all your senses. So that would be an easy way in. And the second thing I always try to help my clients or people who come to my class to see that routine doesn't have to be a daily thing. What if you meditate every other day? That's pretty good, right? Like, and the routine doesn't have to look exactly the same every single day. Um, some days I do a 5-minute box breathing exercise and that's my meditation, and some days I'm really high energy and I can do like a really long sit. So I give myself a range of flexibility of what I can do. And the most important thing— yeah, no, yeah, please go.

No, go ahead.

Yeah, no, I was just gonna say most important thing is to realize that There's many ways to meditate. Like, you can, you can do walking meditation, you can meditate within nature, you can listen to music. You know, I have incense, so you can engage all different sensories and see how you can explore this whole new world and make it fun. Kind of make yourself feel, feel a bit like a kid in the candy store. That's how I felt.

So— I love that. So, Vida, what is One of your favorite ways to meditate? Because I know that's something that you will do, especially when overwhelmed.

Um, okay, so I say it's my favorite stim, but I will hula hoop. But when I'm hula hooping, like, there doesn't have to be a sound or anything. Like, even if I'm listening to music while I do it, I'm super in my head. Like, I'm in— not like in a bad overanalyzing way, like in a You know, your mindfulness space, right?

Mm-hmm.

I also like to color with my opposite hand, with my non-dominant hand. And if you— that's really hard to do. So it is— if I'm hula hooping, it's like my thinking, uh, meditation. But if I'm coloring with my non-dominant hand, like, there's zero room for thought because you're really concentrating on making those things happen. So It just depends on how I want to unplug.

Yeah. Tell me more about the hula hooping. Like, so when you do the hula hooping, are you paying attention to your body sensories or are you like kind of going through like mindfulness of thoughts almost in the process?

Well, it's— there's so much, so many sensations, right? And hula hooping is not a sensation that we get very much as adults like this. It's, it's a lot of like stomach-type massage, right? Like, hula hooping is like— so there's, there's this place on our body that most people do not touch on a daily basis for, you know, insecurities or whatever. So when you're hula hooping, it, it kind of draws your attention to your center.

Mm-hmm.

Because that's where the hula hoop is, right? And so, and then you start noticing different things in your body, like, oh, like You know, and so it's more of an active moving type meditation, or at least that's, you know.

I learned something in my somatic healing course that I'm doing the other day, and I just remembered that I wanted to tell Vita about it. When you're hula hooping, especially Vita uses a weighted hula hoop, and there's those exercise things that you can use. Do you know you're releasing trauma out of your body when you're doing that?

Yes.

So as an ADHDer who carries a lot— all ADHDers, I don't care whether you're an ADHDer who had a traumatic childhood or not, we all have trauma. And whether it's self-inflicted, RSD, all of those things that are part of trauma and being ADHD, and hula hooping is a really, really good exercise to help dump your trauma so you're less overwhelmed.

That's so interesting. I was just thinking about how it's like related to the solar— what's that chakra called? I forgot. Solar—

Don't ask me, I'm bad at that.

But yeah, it's true, trauma gets stored around our hips, so it makes perfect sense.

Like, that's it. It just never clicked with me because that's something that Vida does a ton of, and I avoid like the plague. So now I have to get a boobie. Uh, but one of my favorite ways, because I am I am AuDHD, so I'm the combination of ADHD and autistic.

So is Vida.

But for me, it depends on the day what's winning, whether it's the ADHD or the autism. Usually it's a battle going on for me. And for me, the meditation that works the best is actually sitting and listening to music. And I use— and I've talked about this quite a few times— the entrance music to Galaxy's Edge in Disney World. Because that music, the tones of it Um, the flow of it and everything is actually meant to help you center yourself and like take yourself to another world. That's what it's meant for. But the science behind how all of the tones and everything were created is super— for me, super— I can inwardly focus, I can calm down, I can control my breathing if I'm in panic mode or agitation mode, and it calms down all of my sensory overload very, very quickly. And I actually have a video where I did that while in Disney World with people walking like Tons of crowds walking by me and all of that. I was able to just sit and center and focus and meditate for like— I think I actually sat there for 15 minutes.

Wow, that's so interesting. I never thought about that, but I definitely have moments I specifically listen to like planetary-themed music, like Jupiter. And yeah, like you're right, like because the music is composed in a certain way, it takes you to a different place. That makes perfect sense. Yeah.

And I'm also a musician. So music is automatically going to be something that I can focus in on. But I will tell you, 99% of the time when I'm meditating, I'm fidgeting, I'm moving around, I'm not sitting still. But yet I still can very much get in that zone. And I think that was one of the things that, that I had to learn over the years is that meditation is not sitting still and emptying our mind of everything, because that's not going to happen.

Yeah, I think another way to talk about meditation is more about like an embodied presence. So instead of thinking about like we're upping our mind, more like we're down in our body, we're aware of our sensory, then yes, like we can be in movement and still be mindful of what that feels like.

It's one of those things, it's a hard habit to build, which is one of those things that Vida and I teach, obviously, is But once you build the habit of being able to focus yourself, you can use that in so many ways. Like, you can carry that into taking action and getting work done, getting your house clean, whatever it is that you're struggling to get done. Meditation doesn't necessarily mean sitting still. Again, you can be doing it while doing other things.

Absolutely. And also, I think another big thing for me mindfulness has helped me is actually prioritization. And being very clear on like what I'm saying yes to, what I'm saying no to, and being able to be flexible and adapt— adaptive towards like the flow of life and readjusting, which like, you know, I used to be like getting super frustrated when life happens, which life happens all the time. So I have to learn to be like, okay, it's okay. I can think about it differently, you know, adapt and responding a different way.

So what is some of the best ways that you, especially with a group, and you're doing some group meditations, I would guess, and things. How are, how are some of your attendees being able to really learn that meditation process in a group versus just doing it one-on-one?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So what, what we usually do is, you know, I will preface the practice with some talks so we understand what we're doing. And then before we are doing a practice, I usually try to lay out very clear outlines, like, okay, this is what we're doing. Because I, my ADHD brain finds like the outline super helpful. Otherwise, I'm like, what are we doing? Like, how is this related to anything else? And then in a group, and then we always end with a share and question. And sometimes whatever the practice I've shared doesn't work for them, they can tweak it. Or, you know, they really have an easy time to engage with it. I think the key is really to include any sort of experience into the mindfulness, even If, you know, I may have doubts sometimes when I listen to guided meditation, or I may have a sense of aversion towards a certain teacher, just include any sort of response in our emotion, mind, body into this awareness piece. That's practice.

That's so cool.

I love, I love what you do because hence why we have you on here.

Hello.

But what is one thing that over, especially as a coach, because you're doing, you're coaching people through this process, what's something interesting you've learned about yourself in doing meditations through coaching others and the practice of learning how to coach?

I think it's really just about like collaboration that I think everybody has some gem to share within themselves. Like, I always see like where just this exchange of flow and energy of like I'm learning from them as much as they are learning from me. And that's one of the reasons why I love interacting with human beings. And I can't get enough of it. It's just this gem. Like, we're like, I gather some gems, I share with you, and you gather some gems and you share with me. And I love that. And then to see like the result of collaboration.

Yeah. I love that. I mean, obviously that's about what we do. Yeah, that's what we do. So, Vida, as a coach, so it is disability— it's Disability Pride Month. So as a coach with the disability that we're coaching people on, what's some of the things that you've learned through this collaboration and learning from other Coaches that you have seen or worked with or follow online?

Well, specifically, uh, our lovely guest today. You know, I learned that, you know, meditation does not have to be the static thing. The only thing that I had ever seen about meditation that really resonated with me prior to meeting you was there's a scene in the movie Venom, the first one, And his, uh, neighbors are trying to teach him to meditate, but they can't teach him to meditate sitting down. So they had told him to lay down.

Mm-hmm.

And that was so such a mind switch for me that like it didn't have to look a certain way. And then when you and I met at CHAD and we were talking, and like you said, like when you meditate, like you're, you're kneading bread dough, like you're in this activity. It's And that was like such an aha moment for me. It was like ADHDers can meditate. It just looks different because they have to have an outlet for— not all of us, but some of us have to have an outlet for that extra energy. And so, so that was one of the great aha moments of this last year. And, and I use it all the time because then it put into perspective some of the things that I had been doing for myself as more of a coping mechanism. But looking at it through that lens helps me.

So I was just saying that I love what you said about the extra energy output. And sometimes I think the other way around, the extra layers of input of, I have to, you know, wash dishes while I listen to lectures, you know, I can't pay attention to lecture, I can't pay attention to wash dishes. But if I put 2 and 2 together, suddenly I can do both. Or I'm calling my friends while I'm folding clothes. So I always help people think about like, what's your optimum level of input so you can actually focus? So for me, it's much easier for me to focus on meditation when I'm sitting outside in nature because there's wind, there's bugs, there's like all kinds of noises that you don't get to hear when you're like sitting in a quiet room. So yeah, think about the input and output. That's for sure, like really helpful.

So I think one of the things that I learned about meditation that I Is that I'm— I've already been doing it. When you and I talked at chat, I was like, well, I do that already. Well, I do that already. I do that. Oh, I already do. Because as someone who was— especially as adults who have gone through most of our life without the proper support, we find ways to accommodate ourselves. So I think— Mm-hmm.

You—

it was like, oh, I do that for myself already. Oh, wow, that's meditation. That's not just me. Like, I always looked at it as, okay, Danielle's overwhelmed, she needs, needs her break. And then this is my, my overwhelm break. And I was like, no, that's me meditating. I didn't, I didn't like put two and two together until I talked to you. But that, but that's— and I teach my clients how to do all of those things. Like, I've taught them for 20-something years, and I didn't realize I was teaching them. Forms of meditation, right?

Yeah. And using your strength as well. I love what you said before, like you're a musician, so music makes sense to you. Like, yeah, turning, turning our eyes towards like where we naturally are doing and we're naturally good at usually is a good way to start.

It's just all kinds of things that we already do for ourselves that we don't realize we're doing. And I think one of the big things that so many, especially female ADHDers, AuDHDers do is we beat ourselves up about the things that we can't do or or that we're bad at, or I— or just automatically think we're going to fail at, so we don't bother. And we have this huge shame cycle that we live in because of it. But yet we probably are already accommodating ourselves in some ways for these things.

Yeah.

And in the end, it's looking at the needs. Like, what is the underlying need to meditate? It's probably to emotionally regulate or have a calmer nerve system or relate to people better, relate to ourselves better. So in Whatever way, shape, or form, if we're doing that, like, it doesn't matter so much of what the tools are or like what the exact version of the tools look like.

So what is, what is your favorite thing that you have learned recently that's— that you've kind of added to your, your, your things that you do for yourself?

Yeah, so if it's meditation related, one, one thing, another hyper focus interest of mine is astrology. So I just came across this idea of meditating with planetary energy, like, like kind of what you talked about before, like that planetary music. And yeah, I've been sitting with the idea of like, what if I'm connecting with like planets or plants or trees or rivers, and believe they actually have spirit and then like sitting that sitting relation to that because a lot of my clients Also find, or my people who attend my classes, they also find it's much easier to meditate in nature. I think there's such thing to be said that nature co-regulates us a lot. So yeah, to just really sit with the idea there.

So if you have any questions for us, we actually have a chat going in YouTube right now. If you have any questions for us about meditation or being ADHD, you have 3 ADHD coaches here who are here and can answer your questions. Please ask away. So what is one of your favorite ways to totally disconnect from the world and disassociate? Because I think that's something that we do so often as ADHDers, and we all have our ways to disassociate. But what, what is your way? Do you actually kind of weave meditation into that, or do you have a complete disconnect that you do when you disassociate?

I go into nature, I bake bread, and the meditation particularly I really like to do around those times is called shaking and dancing. It's taught by Dr. James Corden. He taught that practice in many countries after natural disasters or after wars. So it's really just like shaking all your limbs out and pausing and dancing to a music that you really like. So it's really about like releasing the excessive worry or energy. Like, God, like I use that so much. Like, especially if I get excessive worries, I'm like, okay, it's time to do this, you know, think about like— and I also borrow that from my dog of like, you know, how my dog would shake. I'm like, okay, yeah, we're doing similar things.

That's really cool. So Vida, what is your dissociation? Hmm.

I can read in the middle of a hurricane. I could read a book, like, I can dissociate from the world, like, so hard, you know. And, and it's that, you know, they make the jokes about it all the time, right? Like, where you're trying to read a book and other people are talking to you. So, like, people started reading with headphones on so people wouldn't talk to them, you know. But like, if the book is— if I'm super into it, like maybe— of course, most books I get into, but people can talk to me for a hot minute before it registers that there are people outside of this world.

For me, it's very similar. I can do similar things. I can, I can watch videos without the sound on. And just scroll and watch TikTok without the sound on for a very long time, and nobody can break into that at all.

That's so interesting. I was just gonna ask Vaida if, if you read like fiction or nonfiction, because I find fiction so much easier for me to disassociate. Like, I just zoom into that world and I just completely forget.

So fiction for me, that like, that's the thing, it just carries me away even if it's Yep. But I have found there are some nonfiction books that are, are very narrative in the way they present information. And that is something that as an English teacher, or former English teacher, I have found that a lot of neurodivergent people have like a narrative memory. Like, we remember things, they're episodic, they're in a story. There has to be some kind of beginning, middle, and end. So nonfiction books that are written that way appeal more to me. Like, you know, if they tell you something and then they tell you a story where the thing happened, and then they have some kind of like wrap-up or conclusion, like, I can get into those.

That makes sense. That makes total sense.

Yeah. And if I'm reading, I have to be reading fiction. Has to be fiction. I read, especially since now that I'm back in school, I'm reading pharmacology books and books on the DSM-5 and 7 and all of the things coming out, like all of those things. I want a juicy, boring, like Action-packed sci-fi book to read because I can just lose— it takes no thought process. Yeah, but I'm not completely disconnected from the world when I'm reading. Just everything interrupts me. Everything.

Yeah, I was just gonna ask, how do you make— manage not to binge read? Because that's part of the reason why I stopped reading fiction, because I cannot stop myself from binge reading it.

It's okay. It's super hard. And I will find it in my— well, in my adult life, I didn't do this so much as a kid. But since I had started college and stuff that I will push and push and push, right, like most of us do until I reach burnout levels. And then I will start like, I'm going to take a break and I'm going to read a book. And I'll look up in 2 weeks and I've read 20 books and, um, I, I don't remember what day it is, you know, like I have to be really, really careful and it's kind of— okay, the dissociation thing is kind of like anything we do, right? We have to get really careful, we fall into the quicksand of it, like sugar or relationships Or whatever, because we have a hard time with moderation. So like Danielle said, I have to use a timer, or I have to— I used to do scheduled procrastination. And so I would give myself an hour a day to procrastinate. But the only way that I got it was if I did all the things that I needed to do.

Mm-hmm. That makes sense. Yeah, I, I have to try timer with reading fiction. I haven't tried that one yet. Definitely give me something to work to test it out. Yeah.

Yeah, that's reading the 20 books by me was not a careful thing. That, that was the whole hyperfocus trying to disassociate to read. Um, but now, like, as we— especially being ADHD, AuDHD— as we age, we kind of learn our own coping mechanisms and how to put ourselves in boxes to control our hyperfocuses somewhat and scheduled procrastination. I call them squirrel days. I will have a whole entire day where it doesn't matter what I do. In my squirrel days, I could literally be doing 20 things at once, which makes my brain so happy. I could be watching a movie, listening to music, playing a game on my phone, have my Kindle out and a book, and I could be jumping between all of them all at the same time. You never know what I'm doing, but My brain— and, and that's one of those burnout things I need, is to give myself those squirrel brain days where I just do 20 things at the same time because my brain— that's what my brain is feeding on or wanting. Or it could be I just read a whole entire book. I have been reading through the Throne of Glass series by Sarah J. Maas, and I read 8, 7 books in less than a week.

Wow.

Big books because I just needed that. My brain was so overtaxed with school and all of those things, I needed to give myself those breaks. But this— and the reason why I use this timer, people are like, why do you use a timer like that, not your phone? Because this thing is obnoxious as all get out and ticks the whole entire time it's counting down, and I notice it, where if I put another reminder on my phone, I don't notice it.

I love the idea of a squirrel day. Definitely like the intuitive, actually living with our brain and not having demands, not having to follow structure or time. Yeah, definitely. That's so recharging.

Not having to brush my teeth, eat real food, any of those. Yeah, whatever it is I want, that's what I do.

That's amazing. Yeah.

So thank you for joining us today. What is— you have a class coming up. So tell us more about the class coming up.

Yeah, yes, it's starting on July 20th. So next Saturday, and it's a 4-week introduction to mindfulness course. And like I said, I designed it for ADHD folks, or anybody who can't really meditate, and including a lot of the practices I've been learning from a course I'm taking called Neurodiversity-Informed Mindfulness, which is taught by the only teacher basically talking about neurodiversity and mindfulness. And yeah, So I really am excited to see more people in my course. And like I said, it's donation-based. I'm teaching this to graduate from my meditation teacher training program. Yeah, if you want to build a habit of meditation, or, you know, you're like, what the heck is even mindfulness? I try to explain it in very simple models and simple terms so people can actually relate to it. Yeah.

So if you're looking for her and want to reach out to her online, she's ADHD Asian Girl everywhere. You can find her under ADHD Asian Girl everywhere.

Yes.

You can find us at ND Out Loud. We have our YouTube channel, has a ton of videos, our podcast. We, we have a group program that is $19.99 a month where you get up to 5 coaching sessions a week and unlimited body doubling and goal setting and all kinds of things. And we have an online community for you. So we have a lot available as well as one-on-one coaching packages and stuff like that. So come join us if you're trying to learn how to thrive. And I, I'd be kind of sick of hearing this, but thrive with your ADHD. It is possible to upgrade all of the frustration of ADHD and not live in constant frustration. So we're here to help you do that by bringing you people like ADHD Asian Girl.

Yes.

And all the things that she teaches all of us. Please join us at some point. We want to hear more from you. And if you have questions, leave them under the video. And we had questions over on YouTube, so I've been, I've been typing and answering questions over there. Just let us know how we can help because we truly do all want to help you. So reach out to any of us, DM us, we will help just in the DMs. So have an amazing day and happy Disability Pride Month!