Neurodivergent Tax

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It always takes forever. Good morning, everyone. I hope you're having an awesome day today. We're talking about ND-TACS, ADHD-TACS. Autism tax, invisible disability tax. I mean, every one of us has some sort of level of tax when there's disability involved. And so what started this conversation? This was like a conversation 2 weeks ago, I think. So why did we want to talk about this?

So I was Doing some research for something and came across this therapist that was doing EMDR intensives for neurodivergent individuals, which intensives, if you're watching and don't know what those really are, those are like 5 to 6 to 7 to 8 hour long. You know, stretches of therapy built into— sometimes it's multiple days. I think this one was like 5 days, um, and it was an EMDR intensive. It was marketed towards neurodivergent— like, you could tell it was just all through the website. Like, you know, the SEO was just pinging on ADHD, neurodivergence, autism. And I got so angry. Because what neurodivergent individual is going to want to sit through therapy for 7 to 8 hours for 5 days straight? I can't even do that for an hour without being like, all right, bye, I'm good. You know, so it was just very angering and it just brought to scale, like, the bigger problem of So many people marketing, you know, to the ND community, but not truly understanding what that even looks like or doing it the right way. Like, why would you market something that intensive to people that— To somebody with an attention span that has a hard time doing 30 minutes. So thank you.

So there are things that came up when you, you and I got hyperfocused on this for a little while. There are other things that came up for me. One, as a coach— and let's be clear, she's a coach doing this. She probably is an ex-therapist or, or doing this outside her normal therapy practice. That means it's not covered by insurance either. $10,000.

Yeah.

Which is absolutely ridiculous because if I did this in a therapy office, it would be my copay for a therapist to do this in 30 to 45 minute sessions across Mm-hmm. Probably months. Um, which also is safer for a neurodivergent brain. Well, any brain, not just neurodivergent brains. So there were so many red flags that went with this. And then it's just a clear— she's clearly not neurodivergent, even though she was marketing to them, which is always a red flag to me to work with somebody who says they are neurodivergent friendly, but don't experience that life. Because if you've met one neurodivergent person, you've met one and only one. And there's so much that goes into being neurodivergent that is fundamental changes to how we do everything, including getting rest. Okay. Like everything, brushing your teeth can be a sensory overwhelm, like all of these things. And the, and people that market to neurodivergent Adults, ADHD adults specifically, because obviously that's one of the bigger SEO keywords, are always missing the mark.

Yeah.

And then we had this conversation again yesterday where I have a client who is looking for a very specific type of therapist, and I'm like, I— do you know of anyone? Because I have to make sure they're actually understanding neurodivergence, because the amount of therapists advertising that they're neurodivergent friendly is— there's a massive amount, but we all know from experience they're actually not.

Yeah. Well, and I mean, it goes back to when I first saw that and I had texted you and I was like, who, like, what client? And I was like, I, you know, as being ADHD myself, couldn't even sit there for 7 to 8 hours a day, 5 days straight, talking to the same person about the Same thing. Like, no, no, no, no, no.

So what are some other areas that we pay tax as? And I'm going to widen this to not just neurodivergent because I, I pay a massive amount of tax as a neurodivergent with also other invisible disabilities. But here are some ADHD ones that I, I know that I have paid in the last I'm going to say last couple of weeks, I forgot to return something to Amazon on time. So now I'm stuck with this item that doesn't fit.

Story of my life.

That I can't return and get my money back for.

Mm-hmm. Late fees, like, you know, late payment fees, cancellation fees for appointments.

Gosh, there's so many that Like shame, the shame tax on things like that though, where you forget you had an appointment and you didn't show up. Now you have to pay the, the fee for not showing up and the shame of forgetting about an appointment again.

Yeah. Which then ties into like the financial piece and Lord knows the majority of us. Yeah. We struggle with finances. Um, you know, so it just, It just keeps on going.

Um, well, and then we have, we have the medical debt that is a heavy tax on those of us that are neurodivergent, have chronic illnesses. I think 98% of us that are neurodivergent have other chronic illnesses to go with it. So like for me, I have to go get treatments that are not— I have so many things that are not covered by my insurance. That I have to pay in order to function.

Yeah. Yeah. I think my health insurance plan, my max out of pocket is like $7,500 and I'm close to meeting that just this year alone. Just all the different appointments and copays. And I think one of the other places where There is an ND tax mentally is having to educate our own providers.

Oh my gosh.

On neurodivergence and connections between neurodivergence and, you know, various illnesses. And, you know, like sitting in my orthopedics office and having to explain like there's a correlation between Ehlers-Danlos and Neurodivergent individuals and being looked at like, what?

Like, my, my favorite is, did you know that there's a correlation between Ehlers-Danlos and MS? And my, my whole entire team, I have told every doctor and they're like, no, there isn't. There's no such thing as Ehlers-Danlos. That's it.

You're like, illness. Yeah. You're like, hold my beer. I got this.

I mean, I have heard that more than once, or there's no correlation. Yeah, then why do 98% of us with MS also have this? Like, don't tell me even if it was only 46%, there's still a correlation. Yeah, but it's not. I mean, and, uh, other things like, um, understanding that sensory issues and having a wheelchair Being Autie HD and being a wheelchair user, I have to consider the sensory overwhelm of being in said chair.

Mm-hmm.

And at Disney World, everybody that was with me experienced that because I had a pad on my chair that was, because it was so hot, was making me break out and just making my skin crawl and all of that. So I put another pad on my chair and then that made that even worse. And it took me like, I must have spent like 15 minutes before we even got in the Skyliner. One morning, like rearranging everything because it was from a sensory and my skin. Yeah, I was ready to jump out of my skin.

Yeah, yeah, and so much of our lives, you know, we're paying a tax either financially, mentally, physically. I know last night I just. quickly binge-watched because there's only 3 episodes. Um, it was on Hulu, it was Trophy Wife. And the guy had a clinic, a dentistry clinic, where he did sedation on all patients, like before major procedures. Um, or like they could just get sedated and come in and have multiple different things done all at one time. And I know I've worked with several clients who going to the dentist causes them so much anxiety because of the sensory part, and they've talked to their dentist about like, can you please sedate me? Like, this is way too overwhelming. It's sensory overload. It— my anxiety— and insurance doesn't cover it. So then it's like, if they want to, you know, go through with the sedation, they're having to pay out of pocket.

One of my ADHD medications—that is a huge tax for us, and it's both mental and financial. Many of our insurance don't want to cover more than a certain amount of dosage, and they've decided what our dosage could be, like very arbitrarily. I have so many clients that run into this, and then some states require you to do a drug test. Every time you have to go to the doctor's, which you have to pay the copay, and then you have to have a drug test, which you have to pay the copay for.

Yeah.

And then you have to take the prescription, physical prescription, because it cannot be emailed, messaged, faxed to a pharmacy, and then have them question you on your need for this medication.

Yeah. Yeah.

I have a client that is currently unmedicated because all of the steps in order to even get a prescription were too overwhelming for her and she couldn't handle doing it. So now she's completely unmedicated and has lost her job.

Sounds about, about right. I've dealt with so many psychiatrists, um, that are just not neurodivergent friendly. And, you know, I'd send them to them for medication and they tell them, oh, you have to go find a psychologist. Um, to actually diagnose you with ADHD, so then you can come back and we can get you on medicine. And I'm like, okay, wait, hold on. You're— you've got a medical degree, you can diagnose yourself, A. B, like, you're asking a neurodivergent individual to now go to a brand new person instead of just taking the word of the person who, A, has a license and can diagnose, And B, has a rapport with, you know, like my clients would come to me so anxious then because it's like, now I've got to go through all of these steps, talk to this brand new person, go to a psychologist who may or may not accept the Medicaid insurance that I have. And like, it was so stressful. Or like one of the places I had gone at one point, like in order to get my medication refilled, My ADHD meds, I would have to call the doctor myself every month and tell them, hey, like, I need my meds refilled. And then I would have to wait, and their office would be closed on Fridays. And I mean, hello, I'm on ADHD, like, I'm gonna not remember until I'm out of medication or the day before. So it always happened that I'd learn on a Friday, so I'd be without meds for at least 3 days. Then it would take them time to call me back. And like, that's the other thing, the amount of places that do not have an electronic communication system.

Oh my God.

Requiring that.

Yeah. Well, so, and here's another thing, we've got so many psychiatrists and psychologists now who are only cash pay. In thousands and thou— they don't take insurance at all to get diagnosed, and then there's