Study Skills, Self-Awareness & Support: ADHD Life Hacks for Neurodivergent Entrepreneurs

Hello there. I'm Danielle Ralston. I am the founder and head coach here at ND Out Loud. What is ND Out Loud? ND Out Loud is a team of neurodivergent coaches. We are neurodivergent, every single one of us. TBIs, PTSD, ADHD, autism, AudiHD, and so much more. Bipolar disorder, all of the things. We also have a passion for supporting others like us so you don't have to struggle like we did in our past. We have All taken trainings and certifications and all of that so that we can support you in living a better life and upgrading all of the things that are frustrating about your life. What is this session going to give you? This session is going to give you actionable tips. So yes, we're going to talk about our programs and all of the things that we offer, but I want you to walk away with something actionable for something that is overwhelming, frustrating, or just plain annoying you right now in your life. Or if you're a parent or a spouse of someone with neurodivergence, To help them as well. I want you to walk away with something today. So please sign up today for a free call. We can learn more about each other. Hello, hello, hello. It's Danielle and Katie for ND Out Loud, and we're just chatting today. We're not going to chat about any specific subject because I think those are more fun. And I also want to hear from Katie what she's up to lately. She's got so many cool things going on in her business and what we're doing here at ND Out Loud. I want to hear more from Katie and what she's up to lately.

So I'm almost done working on a program. I'm really excited about it. It's teaching kids how to study. So by learning about your own learning preferences, I teach you, I walk you through that. I walk you through the different VARK learning styles, and then I have you take your assessment, and then I actually teach you how to work on these skills over the summer through non-work activities. Through learning a new game, doing something with a friend, just watching videos you're interested in, doing whatever your learning style is and learning something fun with it. And then when you actually go to college or when you're in honors and AP classes, you won't be like, ah, I don't know how to study all this material because it's a lot. So that's one thing I'm really excited about.

Oh, it's a lot.

So I'm working on that and just posting on Instagram and everything and just managing my own ADHD. And it's interesting being an ADHD entrepreneur, I'll say that.

So why is it interesting?

Well, something that you told me, I, one of the most important things that Dani ever told me was there's no one way to build a business and there's no one right way to build a business. And I just think as someone with ADHD who has constantly has so many ideas and is thinking of so many things. It feels a lot more free to be myself and to not follow prescription and just be like, well, today I have this big idea. I'm just going to go all in on that. It just feels very nice to live in my element.

I think that's one of the cooler things about being neurodivergent, ADHD, whatever your flavor of neurodivergence is, and getting to do your own business thing is you really do get to do it your way. And I think that's where A lot of neurodivergent business owners fail is they're trying to do it the guru's way or their business coach that they hired their way or whatever. That doesn't work for us. And I don't care even if you work with a neurodivergent business coach. And this is something I have this conversation with my clients all the time. Don't do it. This is my suggestion. Try this. If it works, great. If it doesn't, let's try something else. There is no one way. And I've built multiple businesses, multiple successful businesses, multiple not successful businesses too. So just putting that out there. But I've learned that every business is different. Every brain is different. Every month, how I operate in my business is different. And having the freedom and understanding that I can do things differently every single week, great.

If I'm having a good brain day, awesome. I can do whatever I want. And if I'm having a bad brain day, sometimes I'm a little bit slower. Sometimes just things go on in your life. I can push everything to the side and just say, I need to take care of myself. Or I need to write down this awesome idea and think about this awesome idea so that I can give myself a little bit of spark.

And it's awesome. So as an ADHDer, because you are diagnosed with ADHD, what are some life hacks that are part of what's making you successful doing your own business right now that are things that you've done forever and ever to accommodate yourself?

So one thing I do to accommodate myself is I live and breathe off my planner. I live and breathe off it. It has everything I need to do. And it's not just during the day, but I'll flip back to previous pages and see, did I miss something on this page? Is there a task that I keep writing down and I'm not following through with? Why am I not following through with it? But then also, and this is another project I'm eventually going to do, I want it to be a little freebie on my website, but I do these things called Sunday meetings. And I wrote about it in one of my blogs, but I really like these Sunday meetings because it gives me a chance. I write down a bunch of questions and I'll give it to you guys soon after I finish my other program. But I take a chance to reflect on my week, check in what I've done, how I feel about my week, what I've learned, because you always learn something, what I celebrated, what I socialized, and then what do I want to do next week that was the same and what do I wanna do sometimes that's different? And that just because with ADHD it's now or it's not now.

Mm-hmm.

And I have a really hard time figuring out, reflecting when I don't have these tangible things in front of me, when I don't have things written down in front of me. It's kind of, oh well, last week was whatever. Last week was fine. Last week was busy. Last week was bad. But if I don't take that time to reflect and think, well, what went really well? What didn't go so well? And how can I make my week better? Or just sometimes we get really into our business and sometimes we forget to socialize. Sometimes we isolate ourselves. And that's something that I know I do a lot. And so sometimes when I sit down and I have my Sunday meeting, I sit down and see, oh, well, did I socialize this week? Did I talk to anyone besides my boyfriend? Did I do anything for me besides building this business? And sometimes I think and I'm like, oh, well, maybe that's why I broke down more than normal this week. Maybe that's why I'm feeling really bad about myself. Maybe I haven't given myself enough go-happy moments, given myself enough positive hits. It's— and I feel like it just makes my life so much better.

Yeah. It does. I do something similar and I call it my second brain system and I do a lot of the same things. And if you've known me or followed me for any time, you talk about those things. So as, because you have these life hacks, it really makes you more self-aware where you are, what's going right, what's going wrong. Does it help you celebrate yourself more when things are going well?

Oh, because I actually have a question in here. It says, I celebrated. So I have a bunch of prompts that tell me what to do. And because I have a hard time celebrating myself, I like to think in the moment I'll say, oh, good job, Katie, and then move on. But that's not enough for me. And so when I put down, I celebrated my patio, building my new patio, getting new patio furniture, I celebrated myself. I sat out there and was like, I am proud of myself for building this space. This is awesome. Or what's another one? This is not realistic because there's a huge pile of clothes under a blanket back there, but I actually did my laundry and put it all away. That is awesome.

And just sitting in that reflection and being like, wow, look what I accomplished this week despite my craziness, my chaos, and my ADHD.

And it seems like it can be really anything, the small things to the big things, but I like celebrating the small things because There's a lot more of those and it keeps me energized and ready to go for when the big thing comes.

Absolutely. So what is one of your biggest struggles as an ADHDer? Let's get real here. What is the thing that cripples you the most? That is the biggest struggle?

Overwhelm and anxiety and imposter syndrome. Let's just throw that one in there too. All of those.

I think we all suffer from those to a certain extent, but when you're neurodivergent, Because I, I hear that, well, everybody has that. Well, but no.

It's not when you wake up and you are so paralyzed. I don't lay in my bed after I get up, but when I'm so paralyzed, I sit here and look at everything and I'm like, oh my God, I don't know where to start. Or if I had a day where I didn't get to do the things that I wanted to do, I didn't get a chance to— if I was running around between clients and doing every errand that I thought I needed to do in that moment because Well, I tend to do that when I'm procrastinating on work stuff. We're really good at that. We're really good at pushing other things off. And I really am good at procrast cleaning. I'm— even though evidence is not there, but I'm really good at it. But when you're so paralyzed by all the things you have to do or want to do, or the mundane things like bills are really hard for me to do. Bills are paralyzing for me, even though I have all of them on autopay, but opening up things that might look like bills or checking the credit card statements because sometimes things get hacked and, or sometimes I buy a lot of stuff and I'm like, ooh, that's a lot of stuff that I spent money on. Maybe I should not do that next month. But when I'm sitting here and just so overwhelmed and paralyzed that it, it's hard to get into the routines that you're gonna make you feel better. Working out in the morning to help with my anxiety, that really helps me, especially when my medicine kicks in. And it just brings my heart rate up. Not in a bad way, but if I don't get that extra energy out, it is bad and it does affect my brain.

But analysis paralysis is a huge one for me. Well, is this a good idea or should I do this one over here? But this one might work this better and I should— that's a huge one for me. And even imposter syndrome for me, I do pretty well with it most of the time because I don't give a crap. Attitude a lot of times, but there are times that still gets me. And I had a moment of that this week. And for me, it's using the tools that I have built for myself to get outta those moments. So for me, it was to go to one of the coaches on my team and say, I have to ask you a question. Do I do, is this something you have seen me do? Is this, I'm stuck in this. And she's like, that's not you. No, no, that's not. And, and fight the negativity that comes up with ADHD because it can be absolutely paralyzing. This is way more than just a neurotypical person having a moment. of temporary weakness. It can cripple some of my clients for months on end. And it's a real thing. So to go to one of my coaches on my team, because I have that support system built in and say, hey, is this— and they'll walk me through the logic of it. And the answer is usually no. Or if it's yes, why is it yes? What is triggering that? Why is this a problem? How do I fix it? And it helps me get out of wherever I'm stuck when I go to them.

Absolutely. Absolutely. It's a little negative to— it's the big— it can be the negativity spiral, and that is really hard to get yourself out of.

But knowing, being self-aware enough to know that I'm not going to do it myself, I have to rely on somebody else for it. And that's what we have ND High for and ND Allowed.

Yes.

Prevent being stuck. Absolutely. And it helps. And Katie and I had a call earlier this week, and just jumping right into some of those things that we do to support each other, It flips the switch on the day.

It does. And even just whether it's body doubling, that's something I constantly go in and out of because I know it's really good for me. But then sometimes the mean thing comes in and it's like, oh, well, you could be paying more attention to doing work on your own instead of working with other people. Well, sometimes it's good to work with other people because if you get stuck or if I get stuck, Sometimes I forget, hey, I can ask other people questions. I can ask other people their opinion or what they know. And when I have that body doubling there, it's a lot more— I'm a lot more likely to say, oh wait, I'm stuck. Let me just ask somebody and then I can pivot to something else while I'm waiting for them to respond. Normally it doesn't take that long, but that's just how my brain works. I like to pivot.

By letting it go and asking somebody else to share that thought process or that burden of a thought process, even if they haven't responded yet, is such a huge relief.

Or even if you just need to complain a little bit and just say, I'm so frustrated with XYZ, and just having someone be like, me too, or I hear you, that sucks. That is so—

It's extremely powerful. And I know that that's— and I was showing our developer the other day of, I want an AI to ask some questions and do some polls for us, and I want to build an automation for that because I don't want to have to worry about remembering. Do that. And I was showing her. So, but I want them to be not, are you struggling today? Say yes or no. I don't want to know that. What I want to put— and I showed her by using one of our chats that we have going from the Disney trip. And I said, who else is feeling lonely today like me? And there was so much of everybody's like, that just made me feel better. I know somebody else was struggling like me. That was emojis back and hell yes, sister, 100%. Nobody had to out themselves. Nobody had to use a thought.

Because it's hard outing yourself. And it's hard saying, oh, I'm feeling this way. But when other people are like, oh, I'm feeling this too, it's like, oh, I'm not alone.

I'm not broken. I'm not whatever the thing is that you need to fill in in that moment.

I'm not dumb, stupid, and lazy. I'm smart, creative, and resourceful and whole. Exactly.

And understanding that we aren't alone, that's huge.

That is huge because our brain can feel—

we isolate ourselves.

It can feel like a lot. And when it feels like a lot, we can crawl into a corner, but We don't have to hide ourselves and feel ashamed.

We definitely don't. If you like this conversation, if you're like, oh my gosh, I wish I had that, if you are an adult or college kid that just wish they had friends that got them, come join us. Because somebody said to me last night when we were talking about this, what, in one of our group chats, they're like, Danielle made me so many friends.

It is true.

I just gave them a space to find them. I didn't make the friends for them. But it really is true when you have a space of people, other neurodivergent people that just get it. And we have people that are just, and I put these in quotation marks for anybody just listening, have PTSD, just have a TBI, just have ADHD, just have autism, have AuDHD, have schizophrenia, whatever. We have all of those flavors in our group. Everybody gets it.

There's— Everyone gets it.

You just make friends easily because you're not going to get judged for saying, today sucks and I want to kill everybody. And while that seems like pretty extreme, it's still having somebody be able to hear that and go, I gotcha. Yep. I feel the same. It's so huge. If you're looking for the same, come join us. We are $19.99 a month. We are as cheap as I could possibly make it easy to find your hive with us here at ND Hive. Have an amazing rest of your day. And if you need anything, Reach out and ask. Bye!