Dennis Prager explains why the "if only" mindset fails: when you solve one problem, your mind immediately generates another to fill the void. Happiness doesn't arrive once a particular obstacle disappears because the mind always finds something new to worry about.
It is absolutely normal to think this way. If only, then I'd be happy. Everybody thinks that way. It is the most natural way to think. And the ellipsis is, if only this changed, or if only this happened. And you fill it in. Here is the point. Have you ever noticed that if you get rid of big problem number 1, all of a sudden problem number 2 takes up its space? That is the way in which we are psychologically structured. If you don't have problem 1, then problem 2 will take its place. I can't imagine if only then I would be happier. I can't imagine because it's so great now.
Life, Legacy, and a Dangerous Mission in the Soviet Union | Sunday Fireside Chat
