The #1 Priority Every Parent Must Teach

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On today's episode of Timeless Wisdom.

Raising children is the ultimate issue of this particular hour, and specifically, specifically the issue of character über alles, character above all. That in setting priorities for how we raise our children, character has to be number one. And for very, very, very many parents, good-willed and decent people, very often character is not number one in the way they raise their children.

That's coming up on Timeless Wisdom with Dennis Prager.

If you're eating less, staying disciplined, and the weight still isn't coming off, the problem may not be your effort. It may be your metabolism. After years of stress, dieting, and lack of sleep, the body adapts. It slows down and holds on to fat. That's why PhD Weight Loss focuses on your metabolism first. So your body stops working against you. Mention Prager today and receive 2 free weeks plus free food, a $1,500 value.

Call 864-644-1900. That's 864-644-1900.

Welcome to Timeless Wisdom with Dennis Prager. Hear thousands of hours of Dennis's lectures, courses, and classic radio programs. And to purchase Dennis Prager's Rational Bibles, go to DennisPrager.com.

To be or not to be, that is the question. Where was God? Isn't God supposed to be good? Isn't he supposed to love us? Does God want us to suffer? 10 years, you're not finished yet? Marty! Why did you do this to me? Who are you? Bruce, I am God. Bingo! Yahtzee!

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Our service has—

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Well, it was nice to meet you, God. Thank you for the Grand Canyon, and good luck with the apocalypse.

Dennis Prager here. This is the Ultimate Issues Hour. Every hour— every hour, auspicious opening— every week at this hour, I talk to you about some great issue of life, and it's called the Ultimate Issues Hour. Pleasure to be with you again. I'm Dennis Prager, and thank you for being with me. Raising children is the ultimate issue of this particular hour, and specifically, specifically the issue of character über alles, character above all. That in setting priorities for how we raise our children, character has to be number one. And for very, very, very many parents, Good-willed and decent people, very often character is not number one in the way they raise their children. And I will give you example after example where we will place success above character. We will place feeling good about themselves above character. We will place being healthy above character. We will, we will place being popular above character. Here is a test, by the way, that you might want to engage in with your child, and it's— if your child is 5 or your child is 50, it's still worth doing. Here goes. What do you think— ask your child, whether 5, anywhere between 5 and 50— what do you think I, your mom, or I, your dad, most want you to be? You have to get the language perfectly down, folks, otherwise it doesn't work. What do you think I most want you to be? Not what do you most want to be. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. What do you think I most want you to be? Happy, smart, successful, Good. And then you, you will learn whether goodness has been the priority. Now you know how much emphasis I place on happiness. In fact, the Ultimate Issues Hour idea derived from the success of my Happiness Hour, which I have every week and have had for about 10 years. I place enormous importance on, on being happy. Happy people make the world better. Not on having pleasure. Pleasure is not the same as happiness, but that's, that's another subject. I'm talking here about being good. That's the number one thing we have to be in life, is to be good. And this hour I argue that in raising children, goodness, being a good person, treating others decently, not being a bully, not being— not picking on, being honest, not cheating on tests, Being a good and decent purpose— a person are not the priorities in raising children. Other things are feeling good about oneself in the self-esteem movement and, uh, and, uh, doing well in school. Those are things that, that animate much of the upbringing of our children. Here's another question to ask your child. But this time it's a— if, uh, actually you could ask your child, has to be in high school for this, high school or older, do you think I would be more upset if you cheated on a test and got into a prestigious university thanks to that, or didn't cheat and never got accepted to a good— to what I consider to be a good college? Which do you think would upset me, your father, or upset me, your mother, more? If you cheated, but you got into a great university, or you never cheated and didn't go to a great university? Which would upset me more? The cheating or the not getting into a great college? Now this, this started this issue which I have raised at different times in different ways and coalescing now into this Ultimate Issues Hour. Began with a question that I will pose to you, to those of you raising, let us say, a teenager. Not let us say, for those of you raising a teenager, would you rather your child cheated on tests or smoked cigarettes? Okay, that's, that's my question for you. 1-800-DENNIS-PRAGER-776. Dennis Prager, 776. Now I always get— not always, I often get the answer, well, that's apples, and that's apples and oranges. Yes, I admit it's apples and oranges. That, that is correct. So I'm asking you, which do you prefer, apples or oranges? I fully acknowledge it's apples and oranges. I'm not asking would you prefer your child cheat on tests or not cheat on tests. I know your answer. Except in the case of the getting into a great college issue. But I'm asking here, what would you rather, or which would upset you more, if your child cheated on tests or smoked? And I'm talking marijuana, smoked tobacco. 1-800-PRAGER-776. 1-800-PRAGER-776. People get very uncomfortable. I have tried this and people get very— I get hate mail. I've gotten hate mail on this as I wrote about it. It a long time ago. People get very annoyed with me with this question. I don't find the question annoying in the least. To me, there's no question. I'd rather my teenager smoked and didn't cheat than cheat and didn't smoke. There's no question. The smoking may or may not stop, and even if not, then there is a possibility that much later on in life he or she will suffer health problems as a result, but certainly not now. But if I don't register my powerful, powerful disapproval of the cheating, then the character that is being formed is the most troubling thing to me. So I'm very clear about it. Many, many wonderful, decent people have smoked, but if a nonsmoker cheats, that's bad news, very bad news. So my children— not saying that I am a perfect parent, I'm far, far, far from it. I've learned a lot in parenthood through mistakes that I've made. But it's been no question to my children what is most important to me, their character. And you may have a different priority, fine. I'm here for clarity, and a lot of parents are not, are not fully clear about what it— what messages they are sending to their child. And that's why you need to prioritize for yourself what is most important. For those of you who answer on this question, well, I don't want my child to smoke and I don't want my child to cheat, that's fine. I didn't ask you whether you want your child to smoke. I asked you which would trouble you more. And if you say equally, then that's a statement too, that, that health issues and character issues are identical to you. All right, so that, and that too is a, uh, is a, an important aspect of the way in which we raise our children. That's why this is an ultimate issue, because the way we raise our children is the way the future of any society will be. And I strongly believe that for many children, character is not integrity, honesty, decency, character— goodness is not the priority. 1-800-PRAGER-776. And we go to Grand Prairie, California, and Nancy— hello, Nancy, Dennis Prager.

Hi, Dennis Prager. Nice speaking with you. Actually, you know what, I totally agree with you. I would rather my child smoke than be dishonest. I've told him that his word is the only thing in the world that he owns, and when he gives his word, and that's to be honest and truthful, then, I mean, he, he's, he is controlling his life. When he lies, he's not. So of course I don't want him to smoke either.

Yes, yes, exactly.

Absolutely.

All right, well, congratulations to you. I have no doubt that that affects the way your child will, uh, will grow up and the type of person, uh, that the child will be as an adult. Paul in Woodland Hills, California. Dennis Prager.

Hi Dennis, it's, uh, Paul. I just wanted to let you know how much you impacted my life with my own children. Uh, about 7 or 8 years ago, my daughter started going to school here in Los Angeles. In public school, the emphasis— whenever I would go to a dinner party or something, everybody would talk about their kids, and they all wanted to tell me that their kid was accepted into this magnet program.

That's right.

And I sat back and I turned to this one man, I remember, and I said, "You know," I said, "that's really great how smart your kid is, but I'm really interested is your child a good person.

God bless you, and I guess God bless me if that's what I brought to you. We, we return in a moment. I will repeat the questions you should ask your kids.

This episode of Timeless Wisdom will continue right after this.

If you're eating less, staying disciplined, and the weight still isn't coming off, the problem may not be your effort. It may be your metabolism. After years of stress, dieting, and lack of sleep, the body adapts. It slows down and holds on to of fat. That's why PhD Weight Loss focuses on your metabolism first so your body stops working against you. Mention Prager today and receive 2 free weeks plus free food, a $1,500 value.

Call 864-644-1900. That's 864-644-1900.

Now back to more of Dennis Prager's Timeless Wisdom.

Hi everybody, Dennis Prager here. This is the Ultimate Issues Hour, and one ultimate issue is certainly how do we raise our children. And I'm focusing in on the issue of emphasizing character, goodness, above everything else. Above their being happy, above— and you know how important, how much importance I place on happiness— above their being smart, above their being successful. And I will repeat the question that I suggest that you ask your child, whether 5 or 50, during the course of this hour, and, or at least twice, at least once or twice. Uh, but I have asked the question, I have asked the question to give an example. If you have a teenager, would you rather your teenager cheat on tests or smoke? As an example of you setting for your own self your priorities. And we go to Chicago and Greg. Chicago, Greg. Dennis Prager, hi.

Hey Dennis, how you doing?

Okay, well, thanks for calling.

Good.

Uh, I would definitely think that the cheating is worse than smoking. Smoking. And it's funny, I'm reading a book right now about Ben Hogan. It's called American Hero. And the thing about Ben Hogan, he was, you know, very much a purist, very honest, hardworking, you know, very dedicated, but he smoked. And he smoked a lot. And it's just, you know, I think the character flaw is a much more important thing to deal with with your children. You know, smoking is something that you can address. Obviously you don't want them to do it, but you can address that. But if they have character flaws, that's just something that you really have to deal with right at the beginning.

Yep, well said, my friend. I appreciate that. Eric in Honolulu, Dennis Prager, hi.

Hey, uh, well, um, I just want to say that, you know, I recently pulled my two of my four children out of public school so I could have a little more emphasis on their life and their upbringing.

Um, you mean, you mean to homeschool them?

Homeschool them, yes.

Yeah, okay, go on.

And in learning about homeschooling and about the importance of homeschooling, one of the biggest features of that is being able to instill, um, not just religion but character building that they can't do in public schools. And as far as your question earlier about the cheating or smoking I would have to say emphatically that cheating would be the larger of two flaws, because if you build the character of a child, of a person, then their self-esteem and their self-awareness is going to go along with that. And the smoking issue, if it were an issue, would dissolve sooner or later anyway.

So how do you deal with the cognitive dissonance of knowing— I assume you feel that I have a at least an acceptable level of integrity? Talking about me, Dennis Prager. Okay, but I smoke a cigar every day. Do you feel it's a character flaw? And I'm not being insulted, don't worry about it. I want to understand how— it sounds to me as if you said that character is number one and character will then take care of the smoking issue, because if you're of good character, you won't smoke.

Well, inasmuch as a self-awareness of health and what you consider is good for your body, everyone has their release. Everyone has their way of dealing with stress. Some people smoke. Some people drink. Some people do different things. And within moderation, as long as it relieves the damage and danger of stress, then it is in the end helpful.

Okay, well said. Okay, all right, I just wanted to make that clear. Eric, thank you so much. All right, appreciate your call. Yeah, because that's— I don't want people to be confused. There are health issues and there are character issues. They're not the same thing. And, and that's very important for people to understand. In, in a, in a film that Alan and I made with David Zucker on goodness, we have a scene where we show, uh, 2 tables at a restaurant, and at one of the tables is an unbelievably, let's see, what, a guy who's like a model or a woman who's like a model, I don't even remember, but I remember the other table was a very heavy guy. And the very heavy guy treated the waitress beautifully and left a very nice tip. And the really good-looking health fiend Dennis Prager basically was a demanding, an arrogant person. There is no connection really between health and character. It's very good to be healthy, and that's a wonderful thing, but it's not a character issue. Are you more likely to be treated well by a fit, trim, fit person than by a fat person? I have the idea is preposterous to me. I have no idea who would be kinder, uh, uh, uh, under any given— or more honest under any given circumstance. I have no idea. That's part of the reason I raised this on an Ultimate Issues Hour, is for you to be clear. You can't raise your children with clarity if you don't have clarity for you. This is not a criticism. It's, it's true for all of us. If we're not clear about what we think is most important How can we possibly convey to our children? All right, Steve in Rosemont, Minnesota. Dennis Prager, hi.

Hi, how are you?

Okay, thank you.

Um, I guess I would like to assert that I would rather— I mean, I am not a parent by any means, but I would rather have my child smoke rather than cheat.

Mm-hmm.

Um, I guess I would have a hard time separating smoking with being a character flaw. I mean, Uh, with, with smoking, I feel like it's also a character flaw. That is something that—

wait, wait, wait. So which, which would you rather your child do, smoke or cheat?

I would rather have them cheat.

Oh, because you said smoke.

Oh, I'm sorry.

Yeah, okay. I, I had a feeling that we were confused. Okay, okay. You rather have your child— that's okay. You rather have your child cheat than smoke because— go on.

Um, I would rather have them, uh, cheat because I feel like that's also a teaching moment and It's something that you can work on, yes. I mean, I'm not condoning either of them. However, smoking I feel like is also just something that's going to be a lifelong addiction. It's going to be something that they're stuck with. And I would have a hard time separating that as not a character flaw. I mean, they're turning— most, I would say, a lot of people turn to that, you know, when they're stressed out. And there's other more productive ways that I feel like you can get rid of stress. Yeah, but it's exercising or being outside, you know, those sort of things.

Yeah, of course, that's true about many things, but it's a health issue. Why do you call it a character issue? Do you think that everybody who smokes— I mean, I'll use me again. I mean, you listen to my show, you must have some respect for me.

Yep, yep.

Well, so when I publicly acknowledge that I smoke a cigar and a pipe Does that— do you feel that, well, that's— look, it's, you know, I wish Dennis didn't because the ultimate health benefit of not is great, but still in all, it doesn't impact my understanding of his character, or do you truly feel that that's a character flaw?

Well, I guess it's a— I feel as though it's not respecting yourself as much as one would, and I guess the same could be said for cheating at the same time.

No, but cheating is not a matter of respecting oneself. Cheating is a matter of hurting everybody else. It's an ethical character issue.

Well, I guess I'm just gonna have to disagree.

Okay, that's fine. And I'm a character, and you know I appreciate disagreement, and you know I only aim for clarity rather than agreement anyway. But all right, there is a man who is 23 now, and he's not a father as he points out, but when he's a father He will emphasize health, in my view, health over character. All right, he has his priorities. That is the question that I am posing to you on this Ultimate Issues Hour. For me, character trumps every other aspect of a child's growing up.

This episode of Timeless Wisdom will continue right after this.

If you're eating less, staying disciplined, and the weight still isn't coming off, the problem may not be your effort. It may be your metabolism. After years of stress, dieting, and lack of sleep, the body adapts. It slows down and holds on to fat. That's why PhD Weight Loss focuses on your metabolism first, so your body stops working against you. Mention Prager today and receive 2 free weeks plus free food, a $1,500 value.

Call 864-644-1900. That's 864-644-1900.

Now back to more of Dennis Prager's Timeless Wisdom.

Dennis Prager here. This is the hour of the week I call the Ultimate Issues Hour. Every week at this time, some great issue of life. And here is the priorities with which we raise our children. And is character number one? Goodness number one? That to me is clear, and that is what I am emphasizing here. And to give you an idea of some of the conflicts that arise in parents raising of their children is the question of, well, is health more important? Is getting into a good school more important? How much would you be troubled by your child cheating on tests if it got them into a great college? And my question of the hour: would you rather your teenager smoked or cheated? And there is one recurring theme here. Well, I guess I should allow you folks to do the recurring theme. But let me get as many of your calls as possible. If you got in, please stay on. There are very important calls up there. Jesse in Akron, Ohio. Hi, Jesse. Dennis Prager. How old are you?

Um, I'm 11.

Okay, thank you for calling.

Um, so my dad thinks that it's more important— um, it would be worse if they cheated on a test because, well, Um, it would affect other kids around us, and it would— they would think that it would be all right to cheat.

Mm-hmm. What do you think?

Well, I think that's pretty much the same too.

Mm-hmm. Well, that's wonderful. You have a good dad.

Thanks. And, um, well, also my sisters, which one is 17 and the other is 14 or 15.

Um, you're not sure of your other sister's age? You're not sure of your other sister's age? No, that's okay.

So they, um, you're a guy. My mom got them a thing for Christmas for smoking, and they actually started to use it.

And wait, wait, your mom got them what for smoking?

Forgot what it's called, but it's just something—

To stop smoking?

It's an Arabic thing.

Oh, a hookah.

Yeah.

Okay.

Yeah, so, well, they started it, but when we found out, we just said, stop right now. Don't do it anymore. They took them away.

Well, a hookah is not particularly dangerous.

Yeah, I know, but—

So it's probably, if it's a substitute for cigarettes, it's particularly good, actually.

Yeah, but it's still legal until you're 18.

Oh, that part of it. Whoops. This— it's okay, it's all right. Well, I can't advocate breaking the law on radio. Yeah, tell your mom I wouldn't report her.

Yeah, okay.

Okay, thank you. Thank you, Jesse. I didn't even know I was wrong about it. Oh well, so, so, so be it. Okay, this is really very important stuff. Lance in San Diego, California. Hi Lance, Dennis Prager.

Hi Dennis.

Hi.

You know, not the child, but the kid, the gentleman right before that. I used to feel exactly like him with the, you know, thinking that cheating was not as bad as smoking.

Right. You know, the one who's 20, the 23-year-old.

Yeah.

And then what happened? When did you change?

You know, I don't, I don't know. I just, uh, I, I, I, I kind of knew you were right, but I didn't feel that way. But what, what did it for me was, um, I thought, who would I rather marry or date, you know, a smoker or a liar?

There you go. That's it. That's a great way of posing it.

When you think about your children, that's right.

Who would you rather, or, or who, forgetting even marriage Who would you rather hire?

Yeah, but you're—

Somebody who you knew is cheating in school? You're hiring a college student. You want one who's cheating in school or one you know who doesn't cheat but who smokes?

The problem I had was, I think everybody has this, when it comes to your children, your immediate impulse is to protect them from all danger.

Naturally.

And so you get hung up on the, well, I don't want them smoking. And 'cause they'll die of cancer. But when you break it down and think like, well, you know, who would I rather marry? And then do I want to raise my children that somebody actually wants to marry them and raise them?

Anyway, smoking doesn't kill any children. It kills adults in later life. Right. So, you know, no, no, that's important to remember. It's not like if somebody said, well, would you rather your child slit his wrists or cheat on a test? I mean, you know, obviously I want a living child I could work on. So that's important to remember in this question. But well done, Lance, it's exactly right. Who would you rather— whom would you rather hire? All right, you are running a business and trust is essential. Person handles your money. You know somebody cheats or you know somebody smokes? It is inconceivable Unconceivable to me that anybody listening would debate that question. 1-800-PRAGER-776, the Ultimate Issues Hour on the Dennis Prager Show. Dennis Prager here. This is the Ultimate Issues Hour, and the ultimate issue today is raising children, and specifically placing character and goodness as the number one priority. In the raising of a child, and that's why I've posed a question which I know is annoying to many, and I do know that, and I don't mean to annoy you, though I do mean to provoke you in this regard to think this through. And would you rather your teenager smoke or cheat? And that is a good question because the question becomes ultimate priority, health versus character. And now, again, if it's, would I prefer that my child swallowed Drano or cheated? Yes, cheated, of course I would answer that because there's a permanent, death is permanent if you burn out the esophagus and burn out the stomach with Drano. Of course, I mean, I'm not nuts. But that's not the case with smoking or some other habits like that. So this is a question to help you establish your priorities. Now, I promised you I would repeat a question that I would like you to ask your child, whether your child is 5 or 50. That question is, what do you think I, your mother, or I, your father, would rather you be? I most want you to be. Again, what do you think I most want you to be, not what do you most want to be. And they are happy, smart, successful, good. It's a very good way to see what you have presented to your child. Baltimore, Maryland, Ron. Hello, Ron. Dennis Prager.

Hi, thank you very much. Um, okay, I guess for me the issue is, uh, ideally of course you want the character to be, uh, optimized, but in this In this case, especially with a teenage kid, I guess what would upset me most, because that's the question, what would upset me most, is which problem would be harder to fix. Now if the kid, that depends on the kid. If the kid were the kind of kid who I thought I could fix the problem of cheating a lot easier than I could fix the problem of smoking, I think the smoking would upset me more. But still kind of a close call because I think smoking is a character problem. People who smoke are not, you know, are being inconsiderate of others if they smoke in the presence of others. Even if they don't smoke in the presence of others, they're putting a burden on the health insurance and the healthcare system by risking their own health and creating a burden for the health system. So it's a tough problem all the way around.

Well, yeah, the problem with that, there are many— I don't consider it a character flaw, so that's one place that we differ. But I'll give you, first of all, Do you believe that people who eat dessert every day have a character flaw, or have a Big Mac every day? Is that a character flaw? Um, would you rather your teenager have a Big Mac every day or cheat? Um, well, that's— since obesity, obesity they say kills as many— I'm sorry, we're told that obesity kills as many people as cigarettes.

Well, if you were to eat that much to the point of becoming obese, then yeah, it's just as bad as smoking.

Um, well, well, if you be— you don't become obese immediately, and you don't die from smoking until much later in life. So you don't— you can't say immediately. Well, okay, but so I'm asking, Big Mac every day or cheat?

Well, like I say, depends on which one I think I could fix.

Okay, so let me tell you on that. All right, so, so let me tell you on that. Even occasional cheater, let me tell you something. It is unbelievably hard to change character traits. Unbelievably hard.

Yeah, I understand, I understand.

Oh, okay. All right, listen, thank you. I appreciate— it's a thoughtful call. Talk about thoughtful calls. Here's, uh, Janine. Janine in Loma Linda. I know you, Janine, and I know you're a very, uh, very serious thinker. So go ahead.

Ah, that's, that's a really nice compliment.

Well, you, you know I believe that. Go ahead.

Well, first off, I want to say I would rather my teenager smoke than cheat, no question. But I am a member of a church that believes our body is a temple of God. It's the Seventh-day Adventist Church, which places some emphasis on health, not the greatest emphasis certainly. And I would like to know if you think someone littering in a synagogue or someone coming in and chipping away at the foundation of your synagogue every week would be a character issue, because I find this in—

Right, but here is a rare example of where I think that you changed the criteria. Okay, the— it is— there's a huge difference between my body is my temple and my temple is everybody's temple, right?

But what if that person, um, what if nobody noticed, um, the— what if nobody noticed the, the littering and it was in a place that, uh—

well, no, but it's still— it is still affecting others, uh, in, in a detrimental way. If you can imagine a situation where it might not be No, no, of course not. And if it weren't, it's— if it's like going through a red light at 3 AM on a rural road, then I don't have a particular problem with it.

Okay, well, I guess that— okay, then I think you're consistent.

Yeah, that's one thing I tend to be.

For the Seventh-day Adventist—

maybe wrong, but consistent.

For the Seventh-day Adventist Church, um, since our bodies are the temple of God, yeah, it is, it is a desecration to pollute it.

That, that may well be, but I can't believe that a, uh, that a, uh, an official in your Church would say, uh, folks, if, if you have a Big Mac every day, we consider that the same as if you commit adultery.

But, but you didn't— that you're changing the criteria now.

No, I'm not.

No, you didn't, you didn't say the same. You said, is it a character issue at all? And I think it's a little character.

Okay, all right, final. Well, all right, for— because you believe that the body is a temple.

Yeah.

Okay, all right. The body, yeah, the body may be a temple, but that could be taken to very extreme ways. I mean, if a person doesn't work out every day, they're secrating their body.

Well, so we take it as a whole. If you treat your body healthfully overall—

All right, but even that, even that, Janine, becomes very complex. I give you an example, and I thank you as always for your call and for your emails and all your work. The— we are told, and I believe this, that people who have friends live considerably longer than people who just have acquaintances. Or don't have friends or people they're friendly with. We are told that people who go to church every week are healthier. Would that be included? I mean, it becomes— health then becomes almost a catch-all for all issues in life. So if our child, you know, would you rather your child smoked and had friends or had no friends and Dennis Prager. All right, final, uh, final segment. 1-800-PRAEGER, 776. Priorities in the raising of children, and the one I advocate is goodness and character overall. We return in a moment.

This episode of Timeless Wisdom will continue right after this.

If you're eating less, staying disciplined, and the weight still isn't coming off, the problem may not be your effort. It may be your metabolism. After years of stress, dieting, and lack of sleep, the body adapts. It slows down and holds on to fat. That's why PhD Weight Loss focuses on your metabolism first so your body stops working against you. Mention Prager today and receive 2 free weeks plus free food, a $1,500 value.

Call 864-644- -1900. That's 864-644-1900.

Now back to more of Dennis Prager's Timeless Wisdom.

Hi, my friends, Dennis Prager here. Last segment, final segment of this hour, this Ultimate Issues Hour. And you can go to prageradio.com and download it because you— I think you would love to play it for your kids or play it for friends or give it to somebody if Whether you agree with me or not, it is a wonderful subject. The clarity of priorities in raising our children, and for me, character trumps all. Trumps getting into a good college, trumps being popular, trumps being happy even. Goodness trumps happiness, and you know how much emphasis I place on happiness. And certainly trumps something like an unhealthful habit like smoking. So that's why I posed this question: would you rather your teenager smoke or cheat? Let's try to get as many as I can here. And Temecula, California, and Jim. Hello, Jim. Dennis Prager.

Dennis, it's very good to talk to you.

Thank you.

Once I heard your questions, I actually called my 15-year-old daughter, which, oh, by the way, is my stepdaughter. I've been with her about 5 years.

Mm-hmm.

15 years old. I asked her the question of what would you rather be happy— or what would What would you expect I would want you to be? Happy, smart, successful, or good? She immediately said good. She brought a tear to my eye because I felt right then and there I was doing my job.

You are, you are, and I am happy. You brought a smile to my face. That's exactly right. Okay, uh, and we go to Oak River, Illinois. Kim, hello Kim, Dennis Prager.

Hi.

Hi Kim.

Um, you know, I think it's a difficult thing because we have, we We teach character to our children. It's one of the most important things in our family also. But I think that when you talk about cheating or smoking with a child, I think they're both character issues, because if a child smokes, that is being disobedient to authority, and that's a character issue for me.

Mm-hmm.

Now, an adult—

But is all disobedience— is every act of disobedience to authority the same? When I jaywalk, I disobey authority. And if I murder, I disobey authority. Yes. So disobedience to authority, uh, is— it doesn't make all of— all disobedient acts morally equivalent.

You're right. Although if my child smoked, I would be completely shocked and lose complete trust in my child. Oh, you should know how— what a serious thing that is. I do understand what you're saying.

Yeah, but don't make it— don't make it that serious then. Say you say it's unhealthy. It shouldn't be up there with cheating. That's what I'm trying to say to all of you. We need to make priorities. I don't want my child to smoke cigarettes either, of course. So you explain it's dangerous, that, that one out of every three cigarette smokers will die prematurely. You tell them the facts about it, but you help them understand that that's hardly the same as stealing answers for an exam. That's your duty as an— as a parent, to make these things clear. This has been the Ultimate Issues Hour on the Dennis Prager Show. Tomorrow on Timeless Wisdom with Dennis Prager, I'm going to address a very difficult issue for many couples. So I am going to try, as a guy, And the men know how often I try to explain our sex to women and defend us guys as well, often. But I'm going to try to make an argument or a series of arguments to married men why you should stay faithful. And again, they're not religious-based and they're not morality-based.

Join us tomorrow to hear more on Timeless Wisdom. With Dennis Prager. This has been Timeless Wisdom with Dennis Prager. Visit DennisPrager.com for thousands of hours of Dennis's lectures, courses, and classic radio programs, and to purchase Dennis Prager's Rational Bibles. We want to take just a second to thank the team at Life Audio for their partnership with us on the podcast. Go to LifeAudio.com to find dozens of other faith-centered podcasts in their network, including shows about prayer, Bible study, parenting, and more.

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